https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 16 Jun 2026 14:47:37 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641644 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 20:47:52 +0000 wrkbrk 2641644@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jackiedavis87: my baby's non birth twin?? I didn't know! I'm sorry mama! So glad it's not still going on! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641632 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 20:21:01 +0000 travellingbee 2641632@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My oldest has always been challenging and was a terrible sleeper to boot. He is super strong willed and had bad colic (later found out it was MSPI) and chronic ear infections. It was a very tough first year. He also is very active and hated being worn or even held. The twos and early threes were filled with tantrums and power-struggles and that was pretty rough too. But now at 3.5, we are finally in a very good phase. Many fewer tantrums and he is so so bright and talented. He is such a joy and is a wonderful big brother. He's funny and everyone at school adores him. And he finally sleeps through the night haha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641615 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 19:47:53 +0000 MrsGeePerez 2641615@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>And it was walking that seemed to turn things around for us, or maybe eating? Once he started walking a couple of weeks ago, he started sleeping through the night (10, 11, 12 hours! Unheard of!) and he suddenly got this huge appetite for solids and now he's just a little king that stomps around all day with a huge smile on his face, giggling and laughing and running around until his next lavish meal... :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641613 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 19:42:36 +0000 MrsGeePerez 2641613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jackiedavis87: it is so incredibly traumatizing isn't it? </p> <p>I finally felt that "heart exploding into millions of butterflies of love" feeling that everyone talks about... at one year! :bummed: </p> <p>I'm a firm believer that us humans are very resilient and despite how brutally hard it was, I'll get over it in time and I won't be so afraid to go for number two, which a few months ago I vowed would never happen. I have an inkling that the second time around will be easier in many ways. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641611 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 19:35:25 +0000 Eko 2641611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DS was like that too. The constant crying and no one believed us about how much he would cry. He would never stop. It got a little easier when he was eating more solids and we were able to start trying to transition him to his crib. Everything had to be done over long periods of time. At a year was a big turning point for us. It still took me a couple months to get over how terrible everything was even after he was sttn. We are in such a good place right now. His tantums I don't even blink at. I like to think it has given me the patience to deal with him now and in the future. Sometimes my family is like oh remember when he used to cry all the time, yeah I'm still trying to forget. Nothing fazes me now. FYI he is 17 months now </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641577 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 17:41:11 +0000 arosebyany 2641577@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My son was the worst newborn, even now at 10 months, some days I want to cry over the momories. He was colicky, MSPI, and could not be put down for the first 5 months of his life. He also screamed 10 to 12 hours a day, but those hours were 6pm to 6am, so just for the first 8 weeks we were on a vampire schedualle. I ended up with PPA and PPD. I fondly remember showing up at my MIL bawling because my child "hated me". Seriously though I envy people who talk about thier perfectly content newborns lol. Before DS we had planed to have 2 children, but now I am one and done, I've already informed DH and he'll get used to the idea eventually. Now at 10 months he's a completely different child, he mellowed out around 6 months. But even still just the thought of being pregnant starts to give me an anxiety attacks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641562 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 16:33:12 +0000 mrswin 2641562@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsGeePerez: I can sympathize, my DD was a terrible newborn. She screamed non-stop, hated being held but cried if you put her down, nursed for hours on end and didn't sleep. I honestly do not have fond memories of her early days which is sad but things are much better now. At 18 months and is so fun and silly. She is fiercely independent and definitely has an opinion. </p> <p>I don't think she liked being a baby :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641351 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 12:43:54 +0000 Mama Bird 2641351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsGeePerez: that sounds so difficult! Colic, constant discontent and scars on nipples? :shocked: I'm glad he's grown out of that phase.</p> <p>I've been thinking about this, and realize that comparing babies is just a recipe for stress. My youngest is so much more difficult than my oldest in many ways (also very wiggly and unhappy as a baby, awful sleeper, refuses to walk on her own) but if I stop focusing on the negatives I realize she's also do much easier in many ways. I've never struggled to nurse her, she's easier to take on vacation because all she needs to sleep well is her human pacifier :silly: , and I'm glad she's the younger kid. If she were the older kid I'd be going gray with stress now comparing the two of them - DS had low muscle tone and his development seemed normal to me when he was my first, but he was so far behind compared to her! Though funny enough, he walked much much earlier - go figure! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641170 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 09:29:00 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2641170@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My older son (who is now 4) was such a colicky baby. I couldn't stand the screaming night and day. I honestly felt like I was going out of my mind. He started to get a little better once he turned 4 months, but it was a gradual progression until he became happy at 6 months. It was so hard...I had a friend who had a little girl who fell asleep just hanging out on the floor while my little guy screamed his head off. </p> <p>If it makes you feel any better, my 4 year old goes to sleep no problem at night while her daughter stays up until 10pm or later and will not fall asleep alone, so I feel like I got the better end of that deal! </p> <p>My second son was far more chill. And I don't know if it was because I was expecting the worst or if he was really a normal baby, but it was glorious. I felt like I had paid my dues and was getting rewarded with the sweetest little dude! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641155 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 09:22:11 +0000 MrsGeePerez 2641155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@catlady: my son never once fell asleep on his own, either! As a newborn and infant, he needed so much help, and so many hours were spent desperately trying to help him fall asleep.</p> <p>Only now, at 12 months, I can put him in the crib, kiss him on the head, and walk away, and he babbles to himself until he falls asleep. I actually sat on my bed and cried tears of joy last week—sleep was such a huge daily struggle. Sometimes I think the postpartum I had wasn't really postpartum at all but just the overwhelming difficulty of caring for the hardest baby ever.</p> <p>We had diagnosed my son with MSPI around 2 months, and after cutting almost everything out of my diet, it still only helped a little bit. Moving to Nutramigen helped even more, but it still didn't stop the colic or craziness!</p> <p>After seeing so many happy babies this month, I was starting to feel like the only one out there with a wild one! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641135 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 08:57:56 +0000 catlady 2641135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine wasn't nearly as hard as yours must have been, but she was very close to colicky, especially before we diagnosed her MSPI and I corrected my diet. I remember having such a hard time on my maternity leave and being so exhausted all the time by having to deal with her crying constantly. She was also a terrible sleeper and wouldn't go to sleep without lots of intervention. She never, ever just "fell asleep on her own" like so many newborns do. We had to resort to all sorts of things to get her to sleep at all (mostly movement, like the swing, stroller, or dancing around while she was in the baby carrier), which of course resulted in a ton of sleep crutches that we had to undo a few months later.</p> <p>These days, she is 3 and such a great kid. We are thankful all the time for how well behaved she is compared to some of her preschool friends. Yes, she's 3, so she has her bad moments, but it's so easy to deal with compared to the early days. And she is a rock solid sleeper, still naps, and never gives us issues in the middle of the night. It's amazing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641087 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 08:09:28 +0000 walshbee15 2641087@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yep I feel you. I didn't know anything different so I just assumed all babies cried and flailed constantly. I eventually stopped eating dairy and soy and he got less miserable but even now at 9 months, he's a lunatic. haha I like the way you put it and I totally agree, his wildness comes out in more constructive ways now. Occasionally destructive ways, as well, but nothing compared to the newborn days. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641042 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 06:32:25 +0000 MrsGeePerez 2641042@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Love hearing how some of your "hard" babies have grown into great little ones. I think the further we get from our baby stage the less it will bother me. If I'm brave enough to try for another, I hope that it's different and we can enjoy that stage more. I can't help but be sad when I look back at our beginning and feel a bit of jealousy when I see those chill little babies! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2641009 Mon, 24 Oct 2016 00:22:46 +0000 808love 2641009@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsGeePerez: My LO was super hard in public. Everything had to be orchestrated and timed to run decently. At least that is how it went down in my sleep deprived mind. She has grown into a sweet, fun, bright kid. She just spent all weekend with my girlfriends from out of town and they kept saying how great and easy she was to have around. She is five now. Every year since she was a baby had been better and better. (Cheesy but true!) Also, although I still don't call her a 'bad' baby, every other baby I have seen out in public has been better than her as far as calmness etc. and I am always so impressed with everyone else's baby. :) Still so happy with LO in so many ways --it is just part of our story now and she definitely was trying to communicate her needs to me every step of the way. She remains an awesome communicator, in a nice mellow sense of the word!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2640988 Sun, 23 Oct 2016 22:01:19 +0000 Foodnerd81 2640988@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter wasn't as challenging as your son, but I can distinctly remember people saying "oh newborn's are so easy to bring anywhere, they just sleep!" And having no idea what they were talking about. My challenging baby is 3 and still a handful but super smart. </p> <p>My second baby is usually that chill baby and I can't believe it. If I only had her I would think you were exaggerating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2640974 Sun, 23 Oct 2016 21:01:06 +0000 MrsGeePerez 2640974@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you ladies! </p> <p>I think one good thing about having such a rough beginning is that nothing has even come close to the torture of the colic stage. A one year old that is running laps around the house, getting into everything, having dramatic little temper tantrums, and needs chasing at all times? I'll gladly take that, thank you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2640969 Sun, 23 Oct 2016 20:44:12 +0000 Silva 2640969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i watched a baby two weeks younger than mine happily chill in the car seat while his mom grocery shopped today. He fell asleep while the cart was still and she was just chatting with someone. Once when I was in a postnatal yoga class with my 9 week old a baby next to us just fel asleep on the floor, unaided.</p> <p>I have a baby who will literally screAm for an hour in the car seat, every single time he's in it. And I have had to nurse both my babies to sleep (often for hours), and both refused pacifiers.<br /> I haven't had as tough a go as you- but trust me, I totally feel the jealousy. I'm even willing to admit that my style of parenting does not encourage independent sleepers but that lady with her car seat loving baby and that magic unicorn baby who will literally just pass out on the floor?? They just got lucky. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2640963 Sun, 23 Oct 2016 20:35:54 +0000 LemonJack 2640963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter wasn't as challenging as your son, but she was a very difficult newborn, and I cringe when I think of those days as well. I think so much of it is just by chance. Some babies are naturally just easier. I'm hoping the next time we have a more pleasant newborn experience. </p> <p>For what it's worth, my daughter is like your son in that she turned into a happy, silly, fun little girl, but she still has that little streak of sassy/stubborn in her that we saw during those newborn days. I know it will help her to have that personality in the future! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/comparing-to-other-babies#post-2640959 Sun, 23 Oct 2016 20:18:07 +0000 MrsGeePerez 2640959@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok, Mamas. My son just turned one and I've been reflecting a bit on the past year. I've been spending time with lots of friends/family with younger babies and I notice that none of them are like my son was at their age.</p> <p>My son was constantly screaming, crying, hated to be held but refused to be left alone, and always trying to escape whatever position he was in. Breastfeeding was terrible, he left big scars in my nipples and he could never, ever get enough. Switching to formula at three months helped, but did not fix all his issues. I never cuddled with him unless he was asleep (only tightly swaddled) and he barely slept for the first 6 months at least. It was pure hell. I cringe when I think about the newborn and infant days. I can't think of any positive memories between two weeks and six months. But as a first time mom, I thought everyone went through this. The other babies I see are quiet, content, not constantly moving or ninja kicking their parents. I felt like I was wrestling a wild animal that never stopped fighting. There was never any sitting quietly on laps or content baby sighs or anything like what I see other babies do. </p> <p>Has anyone else had a very, very difficult baby? Did they grow out of it?</p> <p>At one year, my son is the most glorious, beautiful, happy little dude. So strong, always moving (still), but he's sweet and his "wildness" comes out in more constructive ways. I think he'll always be a little bit harder to handle but he's whip smart and loves people. Things are clearly better now but I feel like I was in shock at how bad it was, and no one seems to understand what I mean when I describe what he was like as a newborn/infant. </p> <p>Has anyone had a similar experience? I feel like I barely made it through, so this one year milestone feels huge and so very happy! </p>