https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 11 May 2026 04:15:40 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2128508 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 16:07:42 +0000 littlejoy 2128508@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Would you consider waiting to find out the sex until birth? </p> <p>Or, maybe you two could sit down and talk about all of the perks of having a girl or a boy. Find the excitement in both!! </p> <p>We were team green, but I felt like we were having a girl. We did have a girl, but if she was a boy, I would have felt disconnected. I think all of these thoughts are totally normal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2128477 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 15:53:45 +0000 AprilFool 2128477@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: I guess it depends on how deep your preference goes. We will be going TG for #2 because I know those 20 weeks won't help me adjust like the actual babe in my arms would. But my preference is slight and I am actually expecting to not get it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2128472 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 15:50:37 +0000 QBbride 2128472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I totally get it!! I was the opposite, we had a boy (which was my preference for #1) and i would have loved a second boy but we are having a girl!! I knew deep down that it was a girl from the beginning so I wasn't shocked but now that I think about it, I'm a little disappointed. I know I will love this baby no matter what but I had always imagined life with two sons! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2128442 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 15:23:47 +0000 babynumber1 2128442@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am on the other end of the spectrum, I have a girl and we find out the gender of LO #2 in 3 weeks. DH really wants a boy, but I would like another girl. I feel bad for wanting another girl when he wants a boy so bad. Only time will tell... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127908 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 10:28:24 +0000 cascademom 2127908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We wanted a girl for our second pregnancy like many others. I had a strong feeling that the LO whose cooking right now was a boy long before I got the blood test results back. At first, I was a little disappointed, but got over it quickly. We have all the clothes already. We know how to manage boys. I can buy girly things for my niece and not wince with sadness about no girls. My parents' neighbor describes having two boys as being "adored by many men." We're also done at two. I'm totally fine with the two boy scenario. I know plenty of other two boy moms as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127795 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 09:26:33 +0000 lovehoneybee 2127795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We really, really, really want a girl. We've decided not to be team green for a second pregnancy just because I'm sure there will be some initial disappointment if we have another boy. Plus, there hasn't been a girl born into my husband's family in 78 years, and this will be the last baby born in this generation so there's a lot of pressure for #2 to be a girl. I'm sure if #2 is a boy we'll eventually be thrilled, but I think it's totally normal! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127703 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 08:26:48 +0000 ElbieKay 2127703@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@NurseDMB: First of all, don't feel guilty. It's ok to want a daughter and doesn't necessarily have anything to do with how much you will love a son.</p> <p>Secondly, even if you have a daughter, there is no guarantee she will be girly. I say this as a woman with a math degree who works in financial technology and always hated Barbie and the color pink even as a very small child. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127692 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 08:16:54 +0000 snowjewelz 2127692@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@AprilFool: Me too! I have a girl and actually want another girl! I have a sister so I think that's why having a boy is so foreign to me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127663 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:39:36 +0000 Smurfette 2127663@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: I totally agree with this. I would have been disappointed to have a boy, so being TG wouldn't work for me. I would have needed the time to adjust to the news. </p> <p>DH and I totally want another girl. So when we do have another, while I will be happy cause I have a girl already, that I don't feel the pressure with #2, I will be a little disappointed with a boy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127656 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:29:26 +0000 Little Misters Mom 2127656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree with everyone else this is totally normal and common. Sometimes I think you just have to admit these things out loud (or on the Bee) to be able to sort of get past it.</p> <p>ETA: I don't know if anyone else has seen the In Gender forums. I stumbled across it while goggling on nub theory when I was pregnant. If you're really struggling with intense gender disappointment those go very deep (and honestly, just having the perspective that at least you aren't THAT crazy, might help). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127653 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:25:07 +0000 lawbee11 2127653@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's totally normal to feel this way. Lots of people have a preference and experience disappointment...don't feel guilty!</p> <p>@wonderstruck: Agreed. I had a preference for a girl and I think if I had been TG and had a boy my disappointment would've taken away from the joy a bit. Sounds awful but it's true! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127651 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:21:11 +0000 hilsy85 2127651@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: I also think is would be a reason for me to want to know beforehand--I would want to process before meeting the baby so that moment is not affected at all by what I "thought" it was. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127648 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:16:02 +0000 wonderstruck 2127648@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@babycanuck: not necessarily true...I guess it depends on the person, but my SIL was team green with her second for this reason and the look on her face in the picture where she found he was a boy...yeah, it's not great. Took her awhile to get over it and start bonding with him. Of course, not saying that would be the case for you! Just that for some people it's better to be able to process the disappointment before birth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127645 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:13:43 +0000 wonderstruck 2127645@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt this way and had two boys. Love both of them to death but it sucks that now I have a decision to make - give up on how I've always wanted a daughter, or give up on how we only planned on having two kids. It's a crappy decision to have to make, and I certainly understand not wanting to have to! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127640 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 07:11:05 +0000 hilsy85 2127640@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it is really normal and nothing to feel guilty about. I think it's ok to feel sad for a little bit if you end up having another son--you are saying goodbye to that image of having a daughter and that is hard! Doesn't negate your love for your new LO if it is a boy. The reality is that you will love your LO whoever they are, and you are a great mom! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127631 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 06:57:12 +0000 babycanuck 2127631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is one of the reasons I don't want to find out the gender. I have a preference and know I will deal with the guilt/disappointment and if I wait until the baby is born, it won't matter as long as the baby arrives healthy.</p> <p>Don't feel bad - a lot of people go through this :( ::hugs:: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127626 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 06:50:10 +0000 travelgirl1 2127626@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had gender disappointment this time, I wanted another girl and we are having a boy. Although I obviously know all that matters is a healthy baby - and I was surprised I felt disappointment because I had suffered a loss in between and really, really just wanted another baby - but it has taken time for it to sink in. It does get easier though and I know without a doubt I will love this baby to the moon and back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127609 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 06:30:57 +0000 Adira 2127609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is soooooooo normal! I felt the same way. I've always always always pictured myself having a daughter, but I have two sons and we're done having children. I'll just have to hope I like any future daughter-in-laws I might get.</p> <p>When I was pregnant with my second, I felt pretty sure I was having another boy because my pregnancy was so similar to the first time. But still, I was bummed when we had the gender scan and found out we really were having another boy. BUT by the time he was born, I was totally over my disappointment and soooooo excited to complete our family!</p> <p>Now I'm excited about the fact I have two boys! I grew up in a boy/girl family and so did my husband, so we have no idea what it's like to have two of the same sex, but we're excited about it! I'm hoping it means they are more likely to stay close. And hopefully they'll have similar interests and we'll be able to do things with them that they both enjoy.</p> <p>Good luck to you. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127587 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 06:06:31 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2127587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sure everything will be ok. The fact that you feel guilty about it says that you will love this baby no matter what the gender. I think society has a preference for "one of each" and lots of moms want the girly stuff (seems like that on hb too) so that also may be influencing how you feel. In any case I'd say to have faith no matter what everything will be ok and don't worry about it for now. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127577 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 05:44:39 +0000 ValentineMommy 2127577@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Totally understandable. I had a strong preference and am having my second son. Although we would like more than 2, it's still difficult, especially when you get a ton of comments about it. Once you're holding that baby in your arms, it won't make a difference one way or the other. Don't feel guilty, it's normal. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127576 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 05:39:56 +0000 Trufflehunter 2127576@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No need to feel guilty as you'll love your son (if indeed you do have a boy) as much as a girl. But sex disappointment is real and quite common. I definitely had a preference for a girl (we did have a daughter) and yeah I would have been upset if she had been a boy especially because it is entirely possible we will only have one. Next time I won't mind if it's a boy but I would LOVE two sisters :) :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127575 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 05:32:03 +0000 AprilFool 2127575@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I get it. I want another girl and can't picture myself with a son but it's a 50/50 shot and what's meant to be will be!</p> <p>You're a great mama and it will be ok! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127573 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 05:06:06 +0000 youboots 2127573@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a girl preference and felt really guilty about it. Sometimes I still feel bad about it. So I get it. When I thought about our future family I always saw a girl. I think it's fairly normal/common. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127563 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 02:14:47 +0000 MrsMccarthy 2127563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Don't feel guilty. You will love your children no matter what. You may have to mourn the idea of having a daughter and that's okay. It doesn't take away from your new son. You may have a girl anyway, you never know but no matter what it will all be okay. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/confession-5#post-2127553 Tue, 31 Mar 2015 00:47:14 +0000 NurseDMB 2127553@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So, I'm pregnant with #2 and my son is 20 months old. When we found out he was a boy I was excited and didn't really have gender preference, although eventually I hoped our second would be a girl. </p> <p>I'm only 11 weeks so have another 2 months until we find out the gender of this baby, but I'm really thinking it's another boy and since we only want two kids, I'm so worried and feeling guilty about feeling gender disappointment if this one is a boy, too.</p> <p>I love love my son to death but I would love to have a girl! I've always been girly, never had guy friends growing up, only had a sister, and my dad passed away when I was young so it was just me, my mom, and sister for a long time. It doesn't help that my son is a MAJOR daddy's boy and always has been, and I'm so scared that the same thing will happen with the next one.</p> <p>I know this all sounds pretty stupid, but just had to get it out! Has anyone felt this way? I feel so guilty because I know all that matters is a healthy baby </p>