https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 15 May 2026 13:39:34 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-281177 Tue, 04 Sep 2012 08:44:53 +0000 Mrs.B 281177@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ladyfingers: I made DH screw our Flat Screen TV down to the table thing it's on lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280694 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 15:47:07 +0000 ladyfingers 280694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH does ti to me, but more with parenting stuff I read. The biggest fight we've had so far is about our flat screen TV -- I want to mount it, he thinks that it's too small to be that far away (huh? It'd be like, 5 inches farther back) and literally rolled his eyes when I told him that toddlers injure themselves by pulling TVs down on themselves. </p> <p>As for the risky stuff, he's more paranoid than I am. He's constantly asking me if I should be doing something, etc. I wanted to paint, and he was so uncomfortable with it, but I forced him to let me because our doctor said it was cool, and I'm a control freak. We did the living room together and he got paint everywhere so I did our bedroom myself on Saturday (low-VOC paint, well ventilated) but after spending 11 hours painting that bedroom, I'm ready to hire professionals for the rest of the rooms!</p> <p>Anyway, I agree that if something is risky to you, don't do it. And if he gives you a hard time, just state that you'd rather be safe than sorry and would rather not do it than have to live with yourself if something happened. And then just go about your business. He'll adjust! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280622 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 13:46:48 +0000 lomom 280622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Lol thanks for the replies! Sounds like I'm not the only one who had this happen. I asked him if there was stuff I could do in another room that would help and he found something. I think that was a good compromise. </p> <p>I'm hoping he'll be able to come to appts with me, I bet that'll make him realize really quickly that I'm not making this stuff up! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280621 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 13:45:34 +0000 yoursilverlining 280621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The thing is....*everything* is "risky" these days. Think up absolutely anything you can think of, and google it, and you'll find that someone out there will claim it caused them to miscarry, or is responsible for their child having autism, or what have you. Unless you live in a bubble (and probably even then), you breathe in and come in contact with all sorts of nasty chemicals and things every single day. You have to decide what you're comfortable with, and if you are not comfortable with something, your husband should back you up.</p> <p>The position I took, which my husband completely agreed with, is that I'm the one carrying the baby, its my body, and I'm the one who is at risk. If I feel comfortable doing something, I'm going to do it, and frankly, I didn't want hear any shit about it. If I didn't want do something because I thought it was risky - same rule applied. Luckily (I suppose), we both agreed on what we considered "risky", and what we just didn't. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280605 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 13:25:13 +0000 travelgirl1 280605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I totally agree with @Googly-Eyes, we have to pick and choose the risks we're willing to take, and those we're not. In general though, I have listened to DH with the ones he's uncomfortable with me taking, and in return he's listened to my reasoning when I've done stuff I maybe shouldn't have, like having my steak medium, still having soft serve ice cream, etc.... One thing he HATES me doing is having the laptop on my knee. Ha and watching trash TV - he wants me to get out of the habit now so I don't pass it on to baby : ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280571 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 12:56:34 +0000 googly-eyes 280571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>To be honest I think we all have to pick and choose which risks we are willing to take. Sometimes DH and I agree on those, sometimes we don't. In the beginning he was less helpful but when I finally got to the third trimester and had a noticeable bump and he could feel and see her moving around, he became super protective, so it is possible your DH will change his mind.</p> <p>Regarding painting (and other things that don't happen everyday) I would just explain to him what the risk is, why you don't want to take it, and then I'd drop it, at least for now. Just simply don't paint or don't do whatever you don't feel comfortable doing, but don't force him to do non-essential things either. Then I'd try to see if he can make it to doctors appointments. Hearing the heartbeat and seeing the ultrasounds when he can has helped my DH stay involved and I think played a role in his becoming more and more protective.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280537 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 12:06:54 +0000 Mr. Coco Bee 280537@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs.B: I was like that too with the nail-polish remover :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280528 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 12:00:17 +0000 Mrs.B 280528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: At first DH was alot like your SO but with time he has gotten WAY overprotective. It's a little annoying at times. He doesn't even like me removing my own fingernail polish because the chemicals can soak into my skin and hurt the baby. After our anatomy scan it became "real" for him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280527 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 11:55:01 +0000 Mr. Coco Bee 280527@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@septemberlove: @coco bee always asked me to do stuff because it wasn't good for the baby (cleaning, painting, moving "heavy" items). At first I thought she was making some of it up just because she didn't want to do it, but after reading up on most of the risks and complications that can happen, and also having our midwife say similar things during our prenatal appointments this totally changed my mind. After that I started getting overprotective of my wife and not letting her move anything, clean anything, or paint anything.</p> <p>I would have him read up on the risks and complications that could happen during pregnancy, and even have him come along to any prenatal appointments and ask the doctor/nurse/midwife questions. Probably best to just show him why rather than just tell him why. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280503 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 11:32:19 +0000 heffalump 280503@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had the opposite problem. My DH was always on the computer researching for himself so he knew a lot and I couldn't get away with anything! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280462 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 10:57:20 +0000 MamaMoose 280462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh I totally get this! My husband picks and chooses what he decides is a real risk. For example he yells at me when I eat non organic produce and yet when my doc sent me to the ER in the middle of the night for the stomach flu I woke hubs up to take me and he says "is that really necessary?" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/dads-to-be#post-280440 Mon, 03 Sep 2012 10:43:45 +0000 lomom 280440@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So it's only been three days since our bfp but I've devoured everything pregnancy-related (well, truthfully, i started researching long before TTC) and started to sort out what's safe and unsafe. I tell DH and he questions me. I'm sure that not every woman who ever painted during her pregnancy had complications, but why risk it?? That's been my message: why take the risk? I feel like he's second-guessing me. </p> <p>How did you share pregnancy information with your husband? </p>