https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 10:52:44 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161620 Thu, 17 May 2012 14:26:44 +0000 T.H.O.U. 161620@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ive had a few "talks" with our center and they have gone really well. I also make sure to loop in the teachers so they don't feel like I am going behind their back. </p> <p>What your talking about doesn't sound normal. Our center has a 1:4 infant ratio and it is tough but thats not right. </p> <p>Also, I have asked them in the past, that if for some reason she is really fussy or inconsolable that I want to be called. I would rather leave work and come get her then for her to suffer all day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161612 Thu, 17 May 2012 14:19:14 +0000 Crisark 161612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: I can't say that I wouldn't be afraid of the same thing as far as backlash is concerned. If they are already bitter about their jobs they may not take kindly to it. However, your child's well being and care are far more important than any inflated ego's. Follow your gut without any reservation and you'll know what the right thing to do is. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161600 Thu, 17 May 2012 14:10:07 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 161600@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Crisark: OMG - that makes me livid! That's the picture I have in my head of what happened yesterday. </p> <p>The other thing I asked them about was if they wipe down the toys between the kids so that they're not constantly passing illness to each other. They said that they wipe them down at the end of the day only..... I'm so frustrated right now - I've already broken down once today. My husband and I are going to meet with the director and get some of this worked out. </p> <p>My biggest fear is that if I bring up my frustrations to the director, and they're relayed to the teachers, then it will backlash on the care she is given. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161445 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:39:05 +0000 Mrs. Stroller 161445@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You need to trust your instincts. Is there a director you can talk with? If you don't think your child is being cared for properly, and don't feel like you're seeing an improvement after voicing your concerns, then don't hesitate to switch. Are there other centers in your area you can visit? Have you talked to other parents here to see if they have similar concerns? Have you considered a home daycare rather than a center? </p> <p>It's difficult to find the right situation for your child and what works for someone else may not work for you. Once you have it right, you'll know it. There's no harm in trying a few places before you find the right fit for your family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161435 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:33:55 +0000 mrs. wagon 161435@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Lozza: oh god, most definitely... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161430 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:31:09 +0000 Lozza 161430@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs. wagon: They still look better than I do after I spend a full day with LO, so it's not like I can fault them :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161424 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:27:32 +0000 mrs. wagon 161424@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Crisark: good for you!!!! That would have totally traumatized me as well. Poor baby. :(</p> <p>@Lozza: haha this is so similar to our daycare-- the teachers definitely like and pay attention to Wagon Jr. at dropoff and pickup, but sometimes they do look tired. But they still make an effort, which I really appreciate. And I don't blame them for being tired AT ALL. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161419 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:25:07 +0000 lemondrop 161419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No experience here, but I wouldn't be able to take my eyes off that webcam! You pay these people a lot of money to take good care of your daughter- so you can be productive at work, worrying all day is not productive. They should be excited to see her everyday and be willing to give you a summary at the end of the day. I hope you are either able to get some changes made through someone in charge or find a better fit for your family. Hang in there and definitely don't let this go! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161417 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:24:05 +0000 Lozza 161417@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our LO is at a larger center, and whenever a kid gets dropped off, all the teachers (and the older toddlers get in on it too) act like they're totally psyched to see him/her. They all try to talk to LO when I'm dropping him off and smile at him and get him to wave. Sometimes at pick-up, some of the teachers look a little tired (can't blame 'em), but they ALWAYS seem to genuinely like and care about the kids. Sometimes my daycare isn't the most organized, and our current daycare isn't as meticulous as our first daycare about reporting on the minutiae of LO's day, but I never ever get a feeling of indifference from them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161400 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:06:01 +0000 banana 161400@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any personal experience since my son doesn't attend daycare yet. But my best friend had to enroll her daughter in 3 daycares before she found the right one. And she complained of similar things....providers that seemed annoyed, not paying attention to her daughter, not giving timely and accurate daily updates. If you're unhappy with the level of service you're receiving at this daycare, I'm sure there are other daycares that would be happy to take care of your daughter and provide better service. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161396 Thu, 17 May 2012 12:00:38 +0000 Crisark 161396@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had the same thing happen with my youngest LO when she was around 8 months old.<br /> But, no one ever told me she was "difficult" or "needed too much attention". I dropped in one day to bring them more diapers for her while I was on lunch from work and found her sobbing on the floor, hyperventilating and being completely ignored while the other two adults in the room tended to the ONE other child that was there. That other child happened to be the grandchild of one of those adults.<br /> I immediately picked up my LO grabbed all her stuff and told them exactly what I thought about them and we left. Never went back and I made a complaint with our local Job and Family Services against them.<br /> DO NOT ignore any bad feelings you have about her care. And I'd recommend switching if you don't think it's improving and if she continues to get ill like that.<br /> And she's 5yr old and just thinking about that makes me sick to my stomach. Follow your gut instincts. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161388 Thu, 17 May 2012 11:53:35 +0000 MamaG 161388@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I struggle with daycare as well. I always ask how her day was when I pick her up, somedays I get more information than other. When we've had issues, I voice them to the director. We seem to have more success with issues getting addressed in that manner.</p> <p>That all being said, my daughter will be moving to a different daycare when she's done with the infant room (1 year). I would have liked to moved her already but I really like one of the teachers she has and I didn't want her to go through anxiety issues with being moved around a lot in her first year. I didn't notice issues as early as a month though either. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161374 Thu, 17 May 2012 11:37:21 +0000 lilteacherbee 161374@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a preschool teacher who has worked in daycare. I have more experience with 3-5 year olds, but I've substituted in infant classes for a couple months. </p> <p>I would definitely bring up your concerns with the director. In one of the classes I was in, there were 8 babies (6 weeks-12 months) and only 2 adults. It did get tough (at one time I had twin 8 week olds and 2 older babies by MYSELF), but I loved it! Of course, it can be stressful, but I love babies so much (esp being around older kids, babies are a nice change of pace). It gets busy, but the staff should always be able to answer your questions and they should be enthusiastic about the kids! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161363 Thu, 17 May 2012 11:30:47 +0000 purrpletulips 161363@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it is daycare center, I would bring your concerns up with the manager/owner because that is unacceptable. They are caring for your child and you are paying them for that service so your expectations/needs (which do not sound unreasonable) should be met. Although colds are common for kids in daycare, it sounds like they may not be keeping things clean enough that she has gotten that many in 3 weeks.</p> <p>My daughter has been at a daycare center since 8 weeks old and although she has had a couple of colds in that time we've been lucky enough that she hasn't gotten anything more severe. The center we are at is constantly washing hands (even at 8w they would wash her little hands after each and every diaper change) and cleaning the surfaces the kids touch. In the infant rooms they would also put any toy that they saw in a child's mouth in the sink to be washed immediately after the child stopped playing with it so that another child didn't pick it up and start chewing on it. Each night we get a daily report that lists everything DD ate/drank as well as the number and length of naps and a note telling us how often her diaper was changed and the diaper contents each time. If she needs diaper cream or other meds that is noted as well. The teachers typically include some little note about something she did as well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161351 Thu, 17 May 2012 11:22:49 +0000 Honeybee 161351@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would say something to the director/manager. The sleep issues might be forgivable; the sickness is to be expected from a group setting; but the negative attitude and the screaming incident are not standard operating procedure. I would be really upset if my daycare allowed my baby to cry for 45 minutes without putting forth an honest effort to console her. </p> <p>DD is at an in-home daycare, so it's a little different, but our provider is only rated for 4 kids under 2 at a time (with 3 additional helpers), and she has a personal policy of having one helper for each baby under 1 year so they get enough individualized care. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161335 Thu, 17 May 2012 11:15:40 +0000 ktdid23 161335@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am not sure if your daycare is a center (like a ChildTime or KinderCare) or a home-vased daycare, but either way this is not how daycare should be. We use a larger center and have had a GREAT experience. My daughter started going when she was 14 weeks old, and the infant teachers were fabulous. They would always say hi to her when we waked in and would take her from my arms into theirs when I left. I never once left her on the floor before walking out to go to work. I have a fairly flexible schedule, so often my daughter would come in late or leave early, I could see that all of the babies were bottle-fed while in someone's lap. </p> <p>You are paying your daycare to provide a loving and supportive environment for your child while you are working. The minimum expectation shoud be that you feel comfortable leaving your child there each day - if not, it may be time to shop around and find a place you feel good about. The teachers should be warm and open and should want to share your child's day with you. You shouldn't feel hesitant to ask about your daughter, and I don't think it is standard for an infant to be left to cry for 45 min. unconsoled. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161316 Thu, 17 May 2012 11:03:14 +0000 LuLu Mom 161316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yikes, I think they shoudl be excited to see your LO. Even if she has had a difficult time the last couple weeks they should want to console her and comfort her! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161305 Thu, 17 May 2012 10:56:54 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 161305@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ok I'm glad to see that I'm not the only one who gets a bad vibe. </p> <p>We get a sheet at the end of each day that shows the start/end of the nap times and when and how much she ate, but that doesn't tell me if she was cranky or happy. I can watch her on the webcam but it's a really small picture so I can't always tell if she's crying or just moving her arms and legs. But of course I'm watching it like a hawk today. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161297 Thu, 17 May 2012 10:53:16 +0000 daniellemybelle 161297@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That is really sad. I wouldn't settle for that kind of care. </p> <p>@LivsMama: This story made me really sad. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161260 Thu, 17 May 2012 10:29:04 +0000 Goldilocks1107 161260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is the daycare a larger one that has specific age-based rooms (it kind of sounds that way). If so, is there a manager/owner that you could voice your concerns to? When we were looking at daycares, we were told that we would get a run-down on the day, every day, until the child is old enough to tell us how the day went.<br /> I think it's definitely worth pursuing because it's not right to let an infant scream for 45 minutes without really doing anything to stop it. Or even calling you at work to tell you about it and see if you had a recommendation for something they could try. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161242 Thu, 17 May 2012 10:10:19 +0000 mrbee 161242@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@highwire: I think a lot of people go into the work with good intentions. :-)</p> <p>I have never had to work with a roomful of crying kids though... it must be so hard. It's hard even when just one of my kids is screaming! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161236 Thu, 17 May 2012 10:04:07 +0000 autumnlove 161236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So sorry to read this! I don't think you should stop asking about your LO's day!<br /> I feel like my daycare providers dislike me ever since I asked them about intentional pacifier sharing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161225 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:57:06 +0000 mrs. wagon 161225@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's awful. I would not feel comfortable leaving my baby in a place like that. I feel your frustration. Can you look into maybe a smaller, home-based daycare? Maybe 1 or 2 adults for 3 or 4 babies? At least until your LO is crawling and requires less naps? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161224 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:57:05 +0000 DillonLion 161224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I just don't understand why someone would work at a DAYCARE and then get frustrated when you have to TAKE CARE OF A KID. Was that not understood going in? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161223 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:56:20 +0000 mrbee 161223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyBoecksMom: Ah ok. What a bummer... it sounds like the the daycare providers resent the kids that are more demanding. :-(</p> <p>It's definitely tough to get individual attention for your baby if the adult:baby ratio is higher than 2:1. Is it possible for you to get a nanny until your LO is a bit older? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161222 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:56:18 +0000 LivsMama 161222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, do NOT back off and stop asking how she did. That is your child, and its their job to tell you how she did. DONT be intimidated to ask or to get the answers.</p> <p>I can tell you - our nanny used to work at the infant room in a daycare center, and said that she was the only one of the 3 in there that "paid adequate attention" to the infants. She would rock them when they cried and was told to "stop paying so much attention to one infant." She would sit in the glider to feed them a bottle, and theyd tell her to put the baby back down and prop the bottle because more kids can get fed that way. She said they were very hands off with the infants because they were constantly scrambling to try to tend to their needs since they werent on schedules, </p> <p>I understand that they may be busy with so many infants, but allowing one to scream for 45 minutes without REALLY trying to calm her down isnt ok and its definitely not a reason for them to be annoyed with your asking how she did that day. Something doesnt seem right there. Id consider being firm with them or looking into another center or waiting until shes a little less dependent. I wouldnt be comfortable leaving my daughter there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161218 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:53:56 +0000 Andrea 161218@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That doesn't seem right to me. When LO was a baby, they could not wait to tell me about her day. Now that she is 2, they are a bit more chill and don't tell me as much because things are more stable. 3 adults for 8 babies seems like a good enough ratio for individualized attention. But maybe they are not all babies ... I see Mr. Bee already asked that question, though.</p> <p>ETA - just saw your response. Yes, something doesn't seem right and you should speak up. Sorry that you are having issues. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161213 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:51:47 +0000 heffalump 161213@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Awww so sorry you have to go through that! I don't have any answers, my LO isn't in day care. Hope others can help you out, that's scary to be so unsure about where your baby is all day long! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161211 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:51:33 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 161211@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Her class only goes up to 9 months, and she's the youngest one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-frustrations#post-161209 Thu, 17 May 2012 09:50:28 +0000 mrbee 161209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our daycare has 2-3 adults for 10 kids, and is able to devote a lot of individual time to each kid! But they have a much higher age limit, so the kids are a bit more self-reliant, I think.</p> <p>How old are the other kids at your daycare? </p>