https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 07 Apr 2026 06:32:10 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296999 Mon, 21 Sep 2015 10:02:07 +0000 Madison43 2296999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh man, this depends on so many personal factors. For us, having a nanny was the only practical option. I need to have flexibility in my schedule and day care couldn't accommodate that at all. Plus, in my area, nannies are so abundant that it was actually easier to find a great nanny than a daycare with an open slot. As for socialization, I have no worries about this at all. My nanny was hugely proactive in this area and reached out to her nanny network to find kids my daughter's age so they meet up with at least one other kid for a play date almost every day. And they go to classes and story time together. For me, it was really important to me that my daughter was in the comfort of her own home while she was little - I'm not sure why, but I was obsessed with her nap time and making sure she was able to nap in her own cribs. She's almost 2 now, so this isn't as important to me, but it was definitely on my mind when she was an infant. Now that we are expecting her another LO in November, I love that our nanny will be around to help out as needed during my maternity leave and that she'll get to know LO2 and her routine well before I have to go to work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296902 Mon, 21 Sep 2015 09:18:19 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2296902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: for about the first year I say nanny. We're planning on a pt nanny when I'm working and grandma and dh will take the other days, did is just starting preschool and we can add extended daycare. I think between 1-2 more socializing becomes important and then daycare might be a better fit, but the first year is stressful enough without daycare if you can pull it off, in my opinion. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296839 Mon, 21 Sep 2015 08:33:00 +0000 snowjewelz 2296839@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: I totally feel you as I have the same struggle! I keep leaning towards center b/c it's easier to find than nanny! Since I have some time tho, I'm still mulling over this... I was thinking maybe getting a nanny that has her own kid to bring over so there's some socialization!? Or an in-home daycare close by that has a few other kids but not full-blown daycare... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296529 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 18:02:15 +0000 MrsH 2296529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: I agree we should talk to her teachers about it. This just happens to coincide with DD2 being a month away from also entering daycare so is only one factor in the decision. For what it is worth she has never met a stranger and typically (even without a parent around) is observant but talkative. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296394 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 14:32:52 +0000 yerpie110 2296394@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MenagerieMama: Haha, it's more like me being too lazy to take her out ;) That's flexibility for both school and nanny is key, and we certainly feel lucky! Hope it works out for you guys! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296391 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 14:30:44 +0000 Truth Bombs 2296391@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: if your daughter has been saying a word at home for six months and her teachers have never heard it before my assumption would be that your child doesn't feel comfortable to come out of her shell at school. If she's shy/reserved, I actually think day care would be best for her to help her with social skills. I would ask the teachers how they think you all can work together to get her more engaged, and if you are unhappy with the outcome I would look at other day care situations before switching to a nanny. I have always preferred the accountability of a day care center to a nanny or an in home day care provider. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296385 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 14:25:39 +0000 MenagerieMama 2296385@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yerpie110: Not until 18 mo? Dang, my LO must be hypersocial! She can't even focus on swinging at the park if big kids are there because she just wants to watch them. She loooooves being around other kids. Even though I doubt she actually plays "with" them. Leave it to my very introverted self to have a very extroverted offspring ;) That sounds like you have a really awesome setup, I wish I could find a great daycare that did parttime like that, most of the good ones around us are full time or nothing. We have a temp spot right now for MWF but will likely have to pay for a full spot once we get off the waitlist for our permanent spot. Gah. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296380 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 14:20:14 +0000 yerpie110 2296380@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We like both, so....we have both! DD1 was at home with our nanny until 2yo and then started 3.5 hours week every morning at daycare. I WOHM pt, so I pick her up two days a week and the nanny does the other 3. I do pack her lunch so she can eat with her friends, and they do lots of activities. She's a learned a lot at school and loves playing, but then she gets to nap at home on her own schedule and have the one-on-one attention in the afternoon + spend more time outside as our nanny drives and take hers to the park, pool, classes, playdates etc. The flexibility of having a nanny continues to be a huge pro for us. She also does light housecleaning and preps most of my daughter's meals. </p> <p>We are expecting DD2 in a few months and the nanny will come full days on the days we need her and will be home with the infant during the mornings and then pick DD1 from school as usual. I'll probably put DD2 in school part time earlier than I did with DD1, but probably not before 18 months - they aren't really socializing much until then, and I really prefer her to get one-on-one attention while she's young and minimize the germs (though I'm sure she will get all of them from her older sister). Truthfully, the key to all of this working out was finding both a daycare and nanny that we LOVE and are affordable and flexible. Still expensive! But the cost is manageable and worth it to us. </p> <p>Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296320 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 13:26:00 +0000 Foodnerd81 2296320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: my LO isn't in daycare, but I will say she definitely talks a lot less in a big group that she does at home or just with one or two other kids. It's not even a shy thing, I think there is just a lot going on and she takes it all in, where at home she just chatters to me or to herself constantly. So that could be part of it. </p> <p>And I see the pros and cons of each. As a SAHM, I see a lot of kids with their nannies at different activities and the playground, and they seem very well socialized and active. But the ones I see, of course, are ones who are going out to story time and music class and the playground. I'm sure there are others that do less and the kids would like more socialization. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296319 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 13:25:53 +0000 MenagerieMama 2296319@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We did nanny for age 3/4-10mo and then now in daycare. I think both have their pros/cons and I think that nanny until at least 6 mo and then starting daycare between age 6-12 mo is ideal. I'm sure everyone's LO is different but once my LO became social and craves it! Around the 8-9 mo mark I was really struggling to find ways to have her see other kids (I'm part-time WOH) and our nanny didn't drive here and we have very little kid heavy stuff other than parks (with minimal attendance).</p> <p>Nanny:<br /> pros - no drop off/pick up, keep routine, less illnesses, one on one (which I highly valued for those infant days), can watch her if she's sick<br /> cons - $$$, figuring out care when she was sick/on vacay, taxes/benefits (we used an agency that took care of that thankfully), less socialization, less oversight (we got nannycams we had such a hard time finding a good fit at first, I think the first one we tried was taking smoking breaks on the job!), prepping meals</p> <p>Daycare:<br /> pros - lots of socialization, activities (LO isn't even one and already does art projects! it's adorable, I think she paints herself more than her paper, but I have no mess to clean up since it's not at home), learning from older kids, so much playtime inside and outside with the chance to be independent as well, more affordable, more oversight (our daycare is NAEYC or whatever it is, ha, accredited and she has a daily report and her teacher has so much to tell me about her day each pick up), not having to pack meals because daycare provides<br /> cons - illness (LO made it almost a month before getting sick enough to miss time, we'll see how the rest of the time goes), pick up/drop off, figuring out back up care for weird holiday closures (Columbus day? come on) and potential snow days</p> <p>For us the tipping point became when she was way more social, and she needed that structure/socialization and we could use the money save! Once we have a second LO I have no idea what we'll do. Because I want future LO2 to have the same benefits when young, but also don't want to pay for nanny and daycare, but also would hate to pull LO1 out of school to be back in nannycare when she loves school! So I don't have a good answer for you! It's hard! Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296309 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 13:17:16 +0000 Mae 2296309@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So I haven't done either... but... I used to think a nanny was ideal. I was actually talking about a nanny share with a friend of mine so we could afford it. But now that I've been a SAHM for 1.5 years I actually feel like daycare would be better. I mean presumably I, as her mom, should be better than a nanny, right? And I actually feel guilty that my kid isn't in daycare. I feel like I do as much as I can with her at home but she really misses out on interaction. It may be a personality thing though. My LO clearly looooves other kids and we go to the park most days. She follows other kids around on the park and I'm like... aw I wish you could play with them all day! I just think she'd have more fun in daycare than she has at home with me all day honestly. So when I go back to work I think daycare is definitely the choice unless something changes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296308 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 13:15:41 +0000 MrsH 2296308@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: last week one of the teachers told my husband that DD1 said "ball" and acted like he should be amazed. His reply was that she has said the for about six months and has quite a large vocabulary and the teacher replied that DD1 does not talk at daycare. I don't think it is a shyness thing and I am more concerned that it is more of they don't pay attention to her thing </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296281 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 12:19:46 +0000 JCCovi 2296281@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We love our nanny. She's very organized and structured so the kids get the best of structured and free play. The kids both get a ton of love and they are learning Spanish (our nanny is from Mexico). I get far more details about how their day went and she will send me pictures/videos during the day sometimes.</p> <p>We also have a ton of flexibility with our nanny which is essential for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296273 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 12:05:51 +0000 creativemomma15 2296273@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I vote for a nanny if you can do it! I agree that a good nanny would probably have fun ideas and activities to do with your kids. And your nanny could still go to parks and story times with your kids. The convenience is so nice to not have to take the kids anywhere, pack stuff, etc with drop offs and pick ups. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296268 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 11:52:28 +0000 TiredmommaMD 2296268@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I work long hours and we chose nanny because we already stay up to get work done after the kids go to bed, I can't imagine staying up even later to wash and prep bottles and pack lunch. Also, our time with our kids is so limited during the week I just want to come straight home and play with them not spend time in the car with them. We do have DD1 in a preschool two mornings per week for socialization (she's 2.5) it's a hard decision, you just have to decide what's most important to you. I wish we could all have the best of both worlds. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296239 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 10:54:26 +0000 Truth Bombs 2296239@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsH: I'm confused by your statement that your "DD1 apparently doesn't talk very much". Is day care telling you that she doesn't talk as much as the other kids in her class, or is a doctor telling you that she's speech delayed and you think daycare is to blame for that? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296238 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 10:47:21 +0000 gingerbebe 2296238@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it really depends on age and temperament/personality. My son is 1 years old and he's been at home with me, DH, and my mom since birth. Now that I'm back to work 3 days a week, he's with my mother those 3 days, whom we hired as our nanny.</p> <p>He's gone to the park every morning for about an hour since 7 months old. Since 11 months he's also been going to church nursery once a week on Sundays during service. This works for us because DS is pretty introverted and gets overwhelmed/overstimulated with too many new people at once. I don't think daycare would have been a good fit for him as an infant. Also, we really dislike the illness factor. So far, he's had 2-3 mild colds in his first year and that has been annoying as it is, I cannot imagine things like HFM or worse. </p> <p>I guess I just don't feel like kids need that much stimulation until they are toddlers? In the next year, we plan to add one or two classes, like swim lessons (because he loves the water) or tumbling, which are Mommy and Me type classes, but with other people too, which will ease him into more socialization.</p> <p>As he gets older - like after 2 years - he will need a little more socialization than we can provide at home. I think at that point we'll find him some early preschool type programs a few mornings a week and take it from there. </p> <p>And yes, the pros of having a nanny are great. I leave straight for work in the morning after kissing DS good morning, he gets his schedule respected, I don't think or worry about him while I'm at the office, he's having his dinner or a snack when I get home, I don't have to worry about his meals, and no illness! My mom helps with laundry, cooks us dinner once while she's here, and puts DS to bed for us so we can take a date night once a week. Its wonderful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296235 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 10:24:19 +0000 LindsayLou 2296235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My little one is only 3 weeks, so I haven't experienced what it's like to have my kid in care yet, but personally, I would go with a nanny. I have worked as a nanny for two different families and as a childcare teacher at two different centers. Although there's absolutely nothing wrong with centers, and they have some amazing benefits, for me, the one in one time wins out. In my experience, even with the most amazing center, and awesome teachers, those teachers just can't pay as much attention to each kid as they want to. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296233 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 10:14:27 +0000 shortcake 2296233@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've done both and vastly prefer daycare. Staying at home even while going on playdates is not fun and educational enough. My kids learn so much at daycare from real teachers. Also, I had a nanny who always needed time off for her or her kids and it was a scramble to cover those days. Daycare is never closed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296228 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 10:09:14 +0000 MrsH 2296228@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Bao: we can budget the money but it will have to come from someplace else - the cost difference is enough for a trip to Disney (maybe two trips even) :( </p> <p>@petunia354: I know! Having two 18 months part is making it a hard decision for us.</p> <p>@Modern Daisy: I don't actually get PTO. I have a billable hour commitment so as long as i bill those hours my schedule is flexible or I can work at home if need be. That said both DH and I have stressful jobs that can have crazy schedules if we need to get projects done.</p> <p>@oliviaoblivia: daycare here seems a lot cheaper than a nanny - unless we paid one under the table or something :p </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296225 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 10:06:13 +0000 travellingbee 2296225@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We've done both and I prefer daycare. He's learned a lot more. Also, it may not bother some people but I found it stressful to have my house clean enough for a "guest" every day. I didn't want her to judge us for a messy house but it felt like a lot of pressure. I also like the accountability and oversight at a daycare. I feel confident in his safety because there are many other people there to make sure things are running appropriately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296219 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 09:57:23 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2296219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When I ever go back to work we will be doing a combo.<br /> DD1 will be in part time preschool while DD2 and DD3 will be with a nanny.<br /> We did a nanny share when it was just DD1 and it worked really well. They were so active during the day and still got tons of socialization but if either kid wasn't feeling well they would have a quiet day.<br /> Daycare for an infant is just a couple hundred less than a nanny here so having two in daycare is insane. Three in daycare would be almost $6,000....haha not going to happen.</p> <p>It's nice having some help around the house too. A lot of nannies will do food prep or throw a load of laundry in. Those little things really help during the week. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296216 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 09:56:02 +0000 Modern Daisy 2296216@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've done both and prefer daycare hands-down. It's more work, but there are SO many pro's that it's really hard for a nanny to compete with especially when kids get older and more interactive. And you mention drop-off and pick-up take a long time, but with a nanny I found this was even worse. I've had two nannies who don't have any family at home and they would NOT leave my house when I got home, even when I asked them to. In my opinion the only upside to a nanny is that you don't have to take PTO days constantly every time there is a fever. If you have crazy work schedules this would be a huge upside. But with daycare I can take a PTO day and drop DS off and just relax at home or go shopping. Plus it is way more affordable, not just on a monthly or weekly tuition vs. salary basis, but also with a nanny you have to pay for a lot of activities so they have places to go during the day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296214 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 09:51:29 +0000 petunia354 2296214@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No advice but we are having the same dilemma now that #2 is on the way. It's so hard to decide what is going to work best for our family! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296213 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 09:50:37 +0000 Bao 2296213@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nanny if you can afford it! But that's just what I would do if I had to decide. I was a nanny for 7 years and I actually planned a lot of activities for the kids. I think not having to lug kids anywhere would be so nice. Especially during the winter months! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/daycare-versus-nanny#post-2296209 Sun, 20 Sep 2015 09:45:11 +0000 MrsH 2296209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Please Give me some pros and cons. I'm really struggling with this.</p> <p>Nanny cons: will cost more, less socialization, less structure<br /> Nanny pros: in our home so no packing lunches, no pickup/drop off, less germs, lots of one on one time, newborn can stay home, less stress??</p> <p>Daycare cons: still expensive for two kids, DD1 apparently doesn't talk very much and we aren't sure how much they are paying attention to her, drop off/pickup is a pain, have to pack lunches because of food allergies </p> <p>Daycare pros: Lots of lessons and art and things for her to do daily, lots of little kids/socialization, much more structured days</p> <p>What would you do? </p>