https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 11 Apr 2026 11:30:06 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1503483 Wed, 19 Mar 2014 07:49:36 +0000 SweetiePie 1503483@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: Yeah, totally hear you. I guess I'm hopeful and maybe even naive in thinking they wouldn't screw me over so I just don't want to screw them over. But if they did there would be hell to pay :silly: But seriously, I guess it does differ employer to employer and everyone needs to feel out their own situation. So that's a good point!</p> <p>I'm still trying to figure out how to tell them in a way that's fair to them and doesn't screw myself. I'd still be shocked if they told me to leave early - it's a position and company with a steep learning curve and I'd think they'd at least want to keep me around for a transition/training. My peers are already stretched thin and they'd be screwing themselves more than they'd be screwing me. I'm definitely going to wait as long as I can...probably 15 weeks or so? So that gives me 2-3 more weeks to plan my attack ;-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1503372 Wed, 19 Mar 2014 07:00:24 +0000 looch 1503372@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: I hear you completely. The problem is though, that employers aren't always fair either. Had I returned, I would have likely been let go...there was a woman that was due 3 months after I was and when she returned to the office, the first thing they did was tell her that she had been let go. No notice, nothing. That's not fair either, especially since you have the whole daycare thing to organize and now all of a sudden, you're out of a job, you know what I mean?</p> <p>I do think though, that if you do plan to return to work, you want all your ducks in a row and have left on good terms, because you never know when they'll need you back or you'll need them for a rec.</p> <p>Did you decide, by the way? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1503368 Wed, 19 Mar 2014 06:56:55 +0000 SweetiePie 1503368@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: See I still don't see a problem with that. I agree there are some reasons why you might change your mind. And you still gave ample notice and even hinted before you left that not returning was a possibility.<br /> My friend knew before she went on leave she wasn't returning, gave them no indication she wasn't returning, and waited till the last possible second to tell them she wasn't. I guess it's not "wrong" because she still earned her maternity leave through the years she worked there before...I just thought the lack of notice and acting as if she had every intention of going back was inconsiderate. I just couldn't leave my employer and colleagues in that position with clean conscience. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1503350 Wed, 19 Mar 2014 06:42:32 +0000 looch 1503350@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: I actually did that, go on maternity leave, and then not return to work. It wasn't an issue because I had already asked the question of HR and I gave them ample time during my leave. I had a 3 month notice period, so I called before the end of February to tell them I would not be returning in July. </p> <p>Sometimes, you can't control things, like if your child is ill and needs extra care, for example. This was the scenario I was thinking about when I asked HR...what if my child is born and has some health issues and I can not return to work? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1503349 Wed, 19 Mar 2014 06:40:47 +0000 looch 1503349@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Lolo: There are rules for the last possible week in which you can tell your employer you are pregnant, at least I know that there are for many countries in Europe. So, I'd look there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1503345 Wed, 19 Mar 2014 06:37:04 +0000 London Mama 1503345@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ Lolo: that is a tricky situation. I would consider what my options are if they were to ask you to leave, do you need the income or will you be ok without it? Depending on how important the job is, I'd decide when to tell my boss. Another important factor is what your local colleagues are like, do they have a lot of contact with your boss and are they likely to tell HR/your boss if they suspect you're pregnant?</p> <p>I'm in a similar situation, with the difference that I've been in this job a lot longer, I'm also pregnant (13 weeks) and my boss is in the US (I'm in London). I won't see him at all until due date other than through video but several of my colleagues have close contact with him. The long and the short of it is that I think I'll have to tell him soon as I'm already showing (2nd baby), and I'm sure one of my local colleagues will put me on the spot in the next few weeks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1495975 Sat, 15 Mar 2014 12:22:08 +0000 Lolo 1495975@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you for this post! I am currently in my probationary period of a new job &amp; found out a couple of weeks ago that I am pregnant. My review to confirm that I have passed my probationary period (I'm pretty confident that I have) will be when I am just over 12 weeks. I will not be able to take paid mat leave as I have not worked at the company for a year, I have decided to leave a couple of weeks before the baby arrives. My concern is that if I tell my boss during my review that they will replace me pretty quickly. I am currently in the Middle East where basically I have very few rights work wise. So my question is how late should I leave it to tell my boss? Oh &amp; he works in a different country &amp; I'm unlikely to see him again after my review before I plan on leaving. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1495681 Sat, 15 Mar 2014 07:35:14 +0000 SweetiePie 1495681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Matcha Latte: Thank you! This does help! It sounds like the best thing is to tell them when I feel comfortable (whether that's 13 weeks or 15 weeks or something else, I don't know) and if they ask about when I'll return saying I'm not sure. Then in July or August, depending on when I want to leave, giving 30 days notice.<br /> This sounds like a fair plan to all, I think. I'm being honest, but not opening the door to be fired sooner, and still giving plenty of time for them to fill my role. </p> <p>Thank you all so much! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1495676 Sat, 15 Mar 2014 07:24:32 +0000 Matcha Latte 1495676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: I did the same thing you are thinking about doing. I worried that my coworkers would resent me or my work would for quitting so far in advance but it ended up working out. </p> <p>I did end up telling my work when I was around 12 weeks that I was pregnant so they would know that I would at least be expecting to take some kind of time off around the baby's due date and they could prepare for hiring a temp. Then I just gave them a months notice before the day I wanted to leave. I didn't tell them I was leaving to be a SAHM but just let them know that due to the distance and other requirements of the of the job it wouldn't be as feasible as I hoped to continue working there after the baby's birth. (I had a 1-1.5 hr commute one way and there would often be times where I would have to stay until 9pm). I was and am still dealing with horrible morning sickness which made it unbearable to sit in a car so long so they also new about how horrible I would be feeling each day. It was nerve racking bringing it up to my boss and HR but it ended up going pretty well and I still am on good terms with quite a few of my past co-workers. As a few other people have mentioned I would just give them 30 days notice as that should be sufficient in giving them time to prepare and hire someone to replace you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1495642 Sat, 15 Mar 2014 06:38:57 +0000 SweetiePie 1495642@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@purrpletulips: @septca: @stratosphere: That has occurred to me too and I'm glad someone else said it. I really don't think they would because we have a good relationship, but it's a possibility. Quite honestly though, I hate the job and don't need the money. Everything I make is just "gravy" for us, so that doesn't matter to me. Secretly I'd be a little happy if they let me go sooner! I guess the biggest reason I'd like to stay till August or even early Sept is so that I hit 1 year of being there. I know it sounds silly but I think that will look better on my resume should I decide to go back to work.<br /> But I think that one of the natural questions they'll ask after telling them I'm pregnant is "what will you do for mat leave" or even "when will you be back". I just can't lie to them and say I'm coming back when I know I'm not. I guess I could say I'm not sure and Id like to see how I feel as my due date approaches?</p> <p>@Chillybear: I'm a contractor so I get no real benefits, and no paid time off. But my husband covers all that stuff! So it's not a concern. But good thinking!</p> <p>@Beyond2: @lamariniere: Yeah I totally get that! I know some women have every intention of returning and then while on mat leave change their mind. What I wouldn't be ok with is knowing I'm not going back while collecting mat leave pay and putting the strain of my job on my coworkers for a few months when they could have hired someone else. I have a friend who fully knew she wasn't returning but took the mat leave anyway and then quit. I think that's wrong. In my case they wouldn't be paying me, but I know they'd hold the position until I got back and one of my colleagues would pick up my slack. I'd feel bad! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1495619 Sat, 15 Mar 2014 04:25:03 +0000 stratosphere 1495619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would tell your boss you're pregnant whenever you want to, but wouldn't give notice that you're quitting until 30 days before the day you would like to be your last. If you give them super early notice there is nothing keeping them from terminating you now and going ahead and finding your replacement sooner rather than later. I think 30 days is a good courtesy notice in this situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493820 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 09:28:32 +0000 septca 1493820@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would not resign at the same time. You risk being let go immediately not having a paycheck for the next few months. I would just play it by ear - you might not even want 2 months at home before the baby comes. If it were me, I would tell my boss I was pregnant but not mention not coming back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493784 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 09:19:57 +0000 purrpletulips 1493784@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't see why you couldn't, the only thing I would say is that if you have an either party can terminate anytime clause be prepared that they may terminate it themselves earlier than you planned. I'm not in HR or a lawyer but I would think that since you will have told them you are not returning and they would have to hire/train someone to replace you, they could do so earlier than you chose. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493763 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 09:16:12 +0000 lamariniere 1493763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Beyond2: I had a similar situation. I had planned on returning after my 4 months of leave, and even extended 4 more months. But after the first month of the extension, I decided to quit. My boss was very understanding, and they ended up just fully hiring the woman who covered my mat leave.</p> <p>In your particular case, I would imagine they would be grateful that you give them so much notice. If you tell them now (or soon) that you are leaving and not coming back in August, I don't see how they could be anything but understanding. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493696 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 09:04:38 +0000 Chillybear 1493696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>does health insurance coverage continue or end if you make that decision? i dont really know how that works </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493653 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 08:47:58 +0000 Beyond2 1493653@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I originally said I was going back to work and then decided to be a stay at home mom. When it was close to my return date I went to lunch with my boss and told her. I still have a really good relationship with the people I worked with and we often go to lunch together. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493637 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 08:40:28 +0000 MrsH 1493637@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: it's as good a time as any. Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493631 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 08:38:15 +0000 snowjewelz 1493631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it's a good segway esp since you don't want them to ever know that you want to leave b/c you don't like the job! In my last job though there were def people that went on maternity leave and decided not to come back. I don't think people assume they planned it at all; we just chalk it up to them realizing exactly how demanding motherhood is and that could afford to make that kind of decision. There was never any ill will towards them (that I know of) but it is a bit of a scramble to find someone else. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493601 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 08:24:28 +0000 looch 1493601@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@SweetiePie: Oh I see, if you want to leave in August and would be visibly showing, then yes, I do agree about being upfront and telling them why and when at the same time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493593 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 08:21:43 +0000 SweetiePie 1493593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I technically have a contract till the end of 2014 with option to come on full time. But either party can end the engagement at any time.<br /> I want to work until August and I'll be 7 months at that time so I'd feel weird not telling them I'm pregnant, ya know? And maybe it's cowardly but I kinda want to use "I'm having a baby and don't think I want to work anymore" as my excuse for leaving.<br /> I guess they'll be disappointed no matter what and I figure this is the best reason to tell them I'm leaving. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493447 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 06:41:10 +0000 looch 1493447@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since you are a contractor (as am I), do you have a notification period if you do not want to continue working? Are you on for a specific amount of time?</p> <p>I would probably not even mention the pregnancy, but tell them you do not wish to work past the end of a specific month, such as April. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-anyone-quit-at-the-same-time-you-told-your-boss-about-pregnancy#post-1493439 Fri, 14 Mar 2014 06:28:16 +0000 SweetiePie 1493439@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Long story short, I really don't like my job and would like to not return after I have this baby. My husband is ok with it. I'm not even 100% that I'll be a SAHM, I just see it as a good opportunity to cut ties with this place, and I don't like the idea of a mat leave end date hanging over my head. I want to return to work when I am ready. </p> <p>I'm wondering if anyone else has told their boss about pregnancy and when the question about maternity leave or returning came up, told them that you wouldn't be coming back. Should I wait a while to do that?<br /> I won't receive any paid maternity (I'm a contractor so I don't get any time off paid) and I wouldn't feel right taking it and leaving even if I did. I guess I want to give them enough time to find someone to replace me, but don't want them to resent me for the next 5-6 months. Oh, that's the other thing - I want to take off a good month or two before my due date so that I can have those 2 months to do stuff for me, prepare for baby, etc. </p> <p>They don't know that I dislike the job so much and I don't want them to know - even though I don't plan on returning, I do like the people and want to maintain a good relationship. </p> <p>Not sure what I'm looking for - I guess reassurance that someone else has done this and maybe how you presented it? What was their reaction? </p>