https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 23 May 2026 04:47:23 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2643595 Thu, 27 Oct 2016 13:50:04 +0000 combatlibby 2643595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No judgment. My brother "S" is in your shoes: two girls, but they had no plans for a third until their second daughter was born. "S" will be 38 this year and says a third would be crazy although they do have the financial means for it. His wife is fine with not having more. "S" wants his name carried on.</p> <p>Last Christmas, we met his second daughter for the first time (2mo) and "S" asked my mother how many more grandchildren she would like... as if her answer would solve their problem. My mom isn't one to care because she's conscious of what's inappropriate to ask of your child's marriage (i.e. "get pregnant already") She gave the safe answer, "I already have two granddaughters and one grandson. I'm happy with whatever happens for any of you."</p> <p>They still haven't had a tubal or vasectomy so I guess it isn't out of the question. Perhaps they'll wait to see what I'm expecting before making a move? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2608018 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 18:13:58 +0000 ladybee 2608018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With our first, no. I wanted a healthy baby and always assumed number 2 would be a girl. When we found out number 2 was another boy I was devastated. My grandma had just died, I desperately wanted to use her name, I couldn't imagine myself without a daughter. I still would love a daughter but man do I love that baby boy. We are done so I know I'm a boy mom and most of the time I'm good with that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607994 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 15:21:09 +0000 maddyz 2607994@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A little bit. I was pretty sure lo2 would be a boy as well, I am excited about brothers so close in age and i have always thought I'd be a momma to boys for some reason. I think dh would be amazing with a daughter and feel sad that that might not happen. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607988 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 14:35:59 +0000 Mrs. Pen 2607988@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pinkcupcake: it's funny how it typically works out that way :) once they arrive, you realize gender doesn't even matter. They're YOURS and you are so overwhelmed with love for them. It's seriously the best :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607963 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 12:25:29 +0000 pinkcupcake 2607963@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really, really wanted a daughter. My first was a girl and I think I would have been extremely disappointed if it had been a boy. </p> <p>I wanted my second to be a girl again because (1) I wanted my daughter to have a sister, bc I never had one, and (2) I love having a daughter and would have been thrilled with another. Found out he was a boy and have to admit, I felt some sadness - especially when I started to go through the bins and bins of clothes I had boarded, just in case. </p> <p>He's here now though, and I forgot how much I wanted a girl - I absolutely adore having a boy :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607940 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 10:14:17 +0000 Mrs. Cookie 2607940@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Always pictured myself with girls. Love my relationship with my mom and sister (and brother too). But when we found out our first was a boy, we were both thrilled! I did have some sadness at hearing we were having a second boy but it was because I grieving the girl I wasn't going to have. I really love having brothers and if we do have a third we will go team green because it doesn't matter and I can't picture anything but being a boy mama now! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607926 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 08:27:35 +0000 MrsKoala 2607926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, I feel like one of the few people out there that really has no preference! I guess that's why I'm able to do the TG thing each time and it doesn't feel difficult at all. I think this time my husband will be disappointed if baby is a boy but only because he's had multiple dreams that this baby is a girl. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607882 Sun, 21 Aug 2016 00:24:28 +0000 ALV91711 2607882@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was team green. I really wanted a son, for unknown reasons, and I got him. </p> <p>I'd love to have another son. </p> <p>I have two young nieces, so if I don't ever have a daughter I have them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607872 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 22:55:07 +0000 Boogs 2607872@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all, I got exactly what I always hoped for! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607838 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 21:01:32 +0000 Mrs. Pen 2607838@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rachiecakes: oh my gosh. But wow. I'm happy having a son has helped him to heal. Sometimes being a parent is perfect for that :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607836 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 21:00:26 +0000 rachiecakes 2607836@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Pen: he had a really abusive/traumatic childhood and the idea of a little boy was a huge trigger for him (actually having the little boy here has been really healing for him though) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607829 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 20:47:59 +0000 Mrs. Pen 2607829@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rachiecakes: wow, that's shocking! You typically hear the fathers want a son. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607809 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 19:31:46 +0000 erinbaderin 2607809@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yin: When I found out I was having a second boy the first thing my boss said to me was "so I guess now you have to have a third to try for a girl!" Uh, nope! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607808 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 19:24:58 +0000 lilteacherbee 2607808@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, we have two boys and I didn't have a preference either time. We're TTC #3 now and while I would love to experience having a daughter, I would equally love a house full of boys! However, my husband is really hoping for a girl this time and I think he would be a little sad if #3 turns out to be another boy (but he would get over it quickly). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607804 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 19:16:09 +0000 IRunForFun 2607804@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LCTBQE: That's weird. I feel like I know lots of people who really want/ed a boy first. Myself included. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1/page/2#post-2607800 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 19:00:11 +0000 rachiecakes 2607800@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Pen: funny, I wanted a boy because of my relationship with my mom! :silly:<br /> DH had some serious disappointment, he really wanted a girl. He went to therapy over it leading up to DS's birth. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607793 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 18:31:52 +0000 Mrs. Pen 2607793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I did a bit with my first. I wanted a girl. Now I have the second on the way and since my first is a boy, I'm really hoping this one is a girl. We even have a girl name already chosen. Honestly, as terrible as it sounds- I never wanted to be a boy mom. I would have been happy with 2+ girls, but I'm nervous I'll have 2 boys and struggle with it. I don't want to feel that way, but I can't help it.<br /> Especially since we were on the fence about a second anyway, so it's likely we may not go for a third.<br /> I adore my son and so happy I did have a boy first. He's made me love having a little boy. But I look at my moms relationship with me and my sisters vs with my brothers and it really makes me want a girl. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607788 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 18:17:28 +0000 erinpye 2607788@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>None! I am thrilled with 2 girls, and I would have been equally thrilled with 2 boys, or one of each, even though now it's hard to imagine my family any other way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607655 Sat, 20 Aug 2016 08:16:06 +0000 yin 2607655@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wasn't disappointed at all. I wanted LO1 to be a boy and just expected that I would have another. I think everyone else around me is disappointed and wants me to "try for a girl." Yup, that's totally how it works. My parents tried for a boy 5 times and ended up with its 5 girls. Lots of disappointment on their end. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607579 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 23:57:59 +0000 LCTBQE 2607579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: wow, no kidding! the only people I know who ever deeply, obviously experienced gender disappointment had it with their second or third (usually last), if it turned out they weren't going to get one of each or something. my MIL had 4 boys before she finally got her girl--I've never asked if that's why she kept going :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607577 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 23:35:21 +0000 AprilFool 2607577@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a terrible relationship with my brother and really wanted DD to have a sister, it's why we were TG. Zero disappointment once he was born though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607570 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 23:05:05 +0000 birdofafeather 2607570@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LCTBQE: funny because i can think of two families who were DEAD SET on baby #1 being a boy. like to the point where i am pretty sure they would have had some disappointment fairly evident! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607569 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 23:04:05 +0000 birdofafeather 2607569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>no, but i had a slight preferences for girls. when we go for number 3, i won't be disappointed if we have another girl (my girls are the best!), but i will definitely mourn not having a boy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607543 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 21:27:41 +0000 LCTBQE 2607543@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>this board is just like my real life experience, at least for the first baby: with one exception, *everyone* I know wanted a girl. the ones who got one were thrilled, the ones who got boys were either very slightly disappointed, or so happy and grateful they didn't care, even though deep down they did prefer a girl. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607539 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 21:11:45 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2607539@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ginabean3: I hear you, I want a fourth girl. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607529 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 20:18:07 +0000 yellowbird 2607529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, initially. I 100% don't now, but I was a disappointed when we found out LO2 was a boy. I really wanted a sister for DD, but now that I know DS I have no disappointment at all. He is amazing. I feel guilty for ever being disappointed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607519 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 19:46:30 +0000 sunnyday 2607519@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Heck no. I couldn't imagine being disappointed and don't get how sex plays a role in happiness as a parent! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607500 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 18:41:16 +0000 Megatherium 2607500@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It wasn't that I wanted one or the other, but I'd just always thought of myself as a mom to a girl. I'm so close with my mom and sister that I thought I would have girls, but it wasn't a preference. During the pregnancy my husband and I both referred to the baby as she. When the ultrasound tech said it was a boy I was shocked. I sort of had to take a moment to mourn the daughter I thought I was going to have for a second. I knew instantly that we were lucky to have a healthy baby, but I was a little sad. Now that my son is a year and a half I couldn't imagine it any other way. I'm pregnant again and prepared and happy to take whatever biology has cooked up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607497 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 18:38:45 +0000 lovehoneybee 2607497@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ehh, sometimes. Not anymore, now that I have one of each. But after Evan was born I used to longingly look at the little girl clothes and get sad that I didn't have a girl to put them on. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-have-gender-disappointment-1#post-2607491 Fri, 19 Aug 2016 18:16:03 +0000 Ginabean3 2607491@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, not at all! Two girls and very happy. If we do decide to go for a third...I want another girl! :girl: :heart: :wink: </p>