https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 11 May 2026 13:23:52 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109764 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 20:36:27 +0000 MsMini 109764@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think anyone who comes to help should get some baby snuggles! That really is primarily why they are offering I think. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109721 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 19:01:26 +0000 DigAPony 109721@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm not a mom, but as someone who has visited to help out a new mom/deliver food/etc., getting to hold the baby for even a minute is the best part! I would never expect someone to let me hold the baby if they were sleeping, or make them feel bad about it, though I would be disappointed if I didn't get to hold the baby for a short time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109706 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 18:45:08 +0000 Rubies 109706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In the weeks immediately after LO's birth, my in-laws would come over and just take her away from me thinking I would want to sleep. But really, I just wanted to be left alone with my daughter. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109685 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 17:46:29 +0000 sorrycharlie 109685@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@miss-spunkin: haha seriously! even before I was pregnant, if someone I knew had a baby, I never asked to hold until they offered. I just felt weird! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109619 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 16:33:27 +0000 Mrs. Pen 109619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@artbee: more like "expected" to hold him.</p> <p>I was fine with my sister and mom here anytime and holding him, helping out. But others? I was more hesitant. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109617 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 16:31:32 +0000 heffalump 109617@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I always share lo and than get sad about it, so good for you! I'm a sahm so I get her all day every day. So when people come over I let them hold her. Did they even ask to hold her? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109614 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 16:30:35 +0000 Mrs. Pen 109614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sorrycharlie: sometimes I just wanted to say, get your own baby! Lol I never invite myself to a new mom's home to just "hold the baby" lol not cute. I mean sometimes I had people hold him so I could sleep, but I loved having chores done so I could just be with him.<br /> That's our perogarive as mothers, right?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109613 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 16:30:23 +0000 chopsuey 109613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom came to stay with us for 2 weeks (she lives out of state). I knew she was here for a limited time, so I let her have a lot of time with the baby. Before I had my LO, I thought I wouldn't want to "share" her with anyone else. I actually didn't mind letting people hold her as long as they were clean and healthy.<br /> We don't have too much family close by, so everyone kinda left us alone for the first few weeks too.<br /> So far no one's made me feel bad.. although, a few people have annoyed me with their parenting advice--telling me how I should put my LO down for the night, how I should feed, that I need to get out more, have more play dates, etc. </p> <p>I took some advice (against my better judgment) and totally ended up regretting it. From now on I'm going with my maternal instinct and what I feel is right. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109608 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 16:25:55 +0000 sorrycharlie 109608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't been there yet, but I'll probably be the same as you! I've already had people proclaim they'll come over to just "hold the baby" because they (self-proclaim!) themselves as "baby hogs!" as though it's cute. NO. you are not going to just come over and take up space and hold the baby! haha! I feel like that sounds so selfish, but if these people don't come over and sit for a few hours now, why would I find it any different then? grr! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-you-let-people-make-you-feel-bad#post-109606 Mon, 02 Apr 2012 16:24:02 +0000 Mrs. Pen 109606@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Before having my son, so many people told me that if others offered to cone over or help, then take them up on it and pit them to work- ask them to do some chores so I can sleep/be with my new baby.</p> <p>And that's what I did and I don't regret it. Those newborn moments are so precious, all I wanted was to spend time with my husband and new baby, being together.</p> <p>I had a friend offer to come help me for a week when my husband went back to work and I was so thankful. She helped with meals and chores since I was still healing and not able to do much anyway.</p> <p>But she and my mom said something about me hogging MY baby. My mom told me I had to share, and my friend was upset she didn't get to hold him her first day here.</p> <p>I was a little upset, wasn't I doing what everyone said?! And I don't regret only holding/feeding my baby every minute of every day, he's my baby, right??</p> <p>Was there people who ever made you feel bad for your parenting decisions? Did it make you second-guess yourself, or do you know you did the right thing? </p>