https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 14:06:16 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-155348 Fri, 11 May 2012 08:32:31 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 155348@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My great-aunt's husband died at the hands of a kamikaze pilot, so when I brought home an Asian boyfriend (Chinese), she was very suspicious at first. She still made some boneheaded statements like, "Oh he's really nice, not how I thought Orientals would be." But I was impressed with her ability to try and move beyond her experience, though I wish she was able to progress more. She was in her 80's at the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-155338 Fri, 11 May 2012 08:29:58 +0000 yoursilverlining 155338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mr. Bee: a guy friend of mine from college was Korean and started dating a Caucasian girl, which he knew his parents would NOT approve of (only wanted him to date Korean girls). He called them and told them he had met someone and was dating her, and that she was Japanese. When his parents completely lost it (as that was even worse than dating a Caucasian), he then told them he would break up with the Japanese girl. After that, they were fine with his “new” Caucasian girlfriend, because they said at least she wasn’t Japanese :(</p> <p>I went to an inner city middle school where whites were the minority. The school was very racially segregated, which caused a lot of tension. Additionally, there was a lot of economic segregation which caused even more issues (the school served the “upper 1%” as well as homeless teens and everyone in between). In my home ec class I was the only white girl, and two other girls verbally refused to work with me on projects because they “didn’t work with white girls”. It stung of course, but it was what it was. It’s nothing compared to what others receive as treatment on a daily basis! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-155316 Fri, 11 May 2012 08:20:16 +0000 heffalump 155316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think that's kind of silly. I don't get mad at people who are German for all that happened with the Holocaust. They didn't do it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-155312 Fri, 11 May 2012 08:19:03 +0000 mrs. bird 155312@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm of Irish decent &amp; live in MA, so not growing up. I was kind of oblivious to this type of treatment (in my young naive mind it didn't happen nowadays in New England). But now it's something that I'm concerned about for my future offspring as I've seen it happen to DH who is AA. His little cousins who are AA as well call me 'white girl' &amp; will sometimes yell that at one another in an unkind tone- I don't know what it means to them, but it hurts my heart when I hear it. </p> <p>I'm curious to hear from people who did experience this, what your parents did about it &amp; if you felt it was helpful at the time &amp; in hindsight if there was something you wish they had done </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-155307 Fri, 11 May 2012 08:17:04 +0000 autumnlove 155307@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't experience a lot of tension growing up about my Chinese ethnicity. My MIL is Japanese and does not like Koreans. One of my BILs was in a serious relationship with a Korean girl and my MIL refused to speak to her or acknowledge her presence when they would see visit her...AWFUL! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-155266 Fri, 11 May 2012 07:42:04 +0000 Grace 155266@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My grandfather (from Holland) often had a hard time with my dad (parents are from Germany). Just beause of his background. My German grandparents were already in Canada during the war and they hated the nazis, so I always felt it was unfair. </p> <p>You are a bigger person than I, @mrbee:, I'll be damned if I'll apologize for awful things that people did before I was born. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-154607 Thu, 10 May 2012 19:07:23 +0000 mrsjyw 154607@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: def remember hearing rude comments about japanese ppl from korean adults... i didn't have any japanese friends so i was never caught in any situations, but def understand that cultural barrier from that generation. </p> <p>i remember several moments of awkwardness between customers and my parents and my aunts, etc.</p> <p>My parents owned a dry cleaners in an african-american community and my aunts still own beauty supply stores in african-american communities... most of the customers are super nice, but other ppl have made comments about the vietnam war (my family is korean) and other derogatory asian comments. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-154588 Thu, 10 May 2012 19:03:19 +0000 chopsuey 154588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sucks that you had to apologize for the Japanese of that generation.. :T<br /> I didn't really have any tension with kids of other races when I was growing up. Maybe I would have if I had Japanese friends? Maybe not personally, but perhaps my parents wouldn't have been pleased? Eh. Dunno. We've had so many Toyotas and LExuses. HAHA. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-your-ethnicity-ever-cause-tension-with-other-races-growing-up#post-154558 Thu, 10 May 2012 18:54:46 +0000 mrbee 154558@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am half-Japanese... growing up, a lot of my Korean friends had parents who had suffered terribly at the hands of the Japanese Occupation, and swore that they would never forgive the Japanese. So for example, they would not buy Japanese cars, they'd be rude to my mom (even though she speaks Korean), etc. </p> <p>If the topic came up at some point, I would usually apologize on behalf of my people, even though my family didn't fight in the war and we lost everything during the Tokyo firebombing and the post-war poverty (I wouldn't mention this, of course). It was interesting, because it ended up being a intercultural healing of sorts for a number of my friends' parents.</p> <p>It ended up being good practice, because when I met Mrs. Bee's dad... he had many similar feelings, By that point though, I had a lot of experience dealing with it. We were able to get past it all pretty quickly... and he even owns a Japanese car now. :-)</p> <p>Did your ethnicity ever cause tension with other races growing up? How did you deal with it? </p>