https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 11 Apr 2026 19:43:33 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/3#post-1760700 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 16:46:25 +0000 dolphin 1760700@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, he asked my dad and told my two older brothers. I thought it was really sweet. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/3#post-1760698 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 16:44:25 +0000 lilteacherbee 1760698@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup. I'm not sure how long afterward he proposed, though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/3#post-1760630 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 15:56:47 +0000 Mrs. J 1760630@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He took my dad out for a beer about a week before he proposed. My dad thought he was gonna ask for money! Haha </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760560 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 15:24:10 +0000 HLK208 1760560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He asked both of my parents </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760558 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 15:21:51 +0000 anandam 1760558@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wouldn't say "permission" is exactly the right word, but he did try to talk to my Dad ahead of time about his intentions, more to recieve a blessing or gesture of acceptance into the family, an expression of trust in his potential for partnership. We all view marriage very much as a family and community institution, not just an individual decision, so I thought this was appropriate.</p> <p>I guess Dad felt awkward and just kept changing the subject, though, and DH decided the conversation wasn't going to work. So we made our intentions clear and moved forward. There is a disparity of religion between our families and it worried Dad, but everyone's on board now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760232 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 13:16:16 +0000 sunny 1760232@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. I didn't expect him to either. I am surprised so many SOs discussed it with the parents! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760208 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 13:09:15 +0000 AngelicOne 1760208@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope &amp; I'm glad he didn't. We didn't get engaged until I was 30 &amp; I'd been on my own since 18 so he had no say in what I did. They never even met until our wedding in 2012. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760187 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 13:01:00 +0000 mrsrain 1760187@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No way. I had been on my own for years when he proposed. I love my Daddy (yes, I still call him "Daddy"), but he hasn't been my "keeper" since I was in college. I don't think my Dad would have minded being asked, but it certainly wasn't expected. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760145 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:48:41 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 1760145@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Of course! He took my dad out for lunch and a beer and asked him for his blessing... I think it was about 2-3 months before he actually proposed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760141 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:48:13 +0000 bushelandapeck 1760141@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes! He took a day off of work and drove up to have lunch with my dad and ask his permission. It was a really sweet gesture and meant a lot to both me and my dad. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760136 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:47:20 +0000 travelgirl1 1760136@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lawbee11: Awwww I love that, both that your DH did it and your dad's answer.</p> <p>Ha ha no, mine didn't, he thought it was none of my dad's business. I would have liked him to though, just as a nod to tradition, not to seriously ask him. But I remember my little sister's boyfriend asking my dad,they were going on holiday to Egypt, my sis had literally just turned 18 and he asked my dad for a private word at a family BBQ. Me and my other sisters were mortified, she was soooo young!! Not that that is too young to get engaged, but she's my baby sister, you know? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760125 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:45:04 +0000 Espion 1760125@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He told my dad and my sister (ETA: he didn't "ask") while I was taking a quick shower, heh! My sister was jumping up and down and woohoo-ing and he was afraid I'd hear! </p> <p>I nearly found the ring, because I'm a rule follower and was rifling through his Dopp kit for liquids to go through airport security. :p </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760102 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:38:03 +0000 DigAPony 1760102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely not. I despise that tradition--very old-fashioned and sexist. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760100 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:37:49 +0000 lamariniere 1760100@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm really surprised by all the people who's SO asked! It didn't even cross my mind, and I'm pretty sure this is not something practiced in DH's culture. We are very untraditional though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760018 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:12:10 +0000 travellingbee 1760018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He talked to my parents about his intentions but didn't "ask" since we were 34 at the time!! But he did go over there and have dinner with them and let them know and I thought that was very sweet. It made me feel like he was acknowledging that he was marrying into a family not just me. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760010 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:08:44 +0000 MamaG 1760010@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: I tend to be on the same page with y'all. I was 36 when we got engaged. We were already living together (gasp!). And I had already successfully made three cross country moves and purchased two homes independently. I didn't feel like my Dad needed to have any input in my decisions as I was clearly an adult and capable of making life decisions.</p> <p>We aren't traditional though. DH and I shopped for my ring together (I choose the setting, he picked the stone) and I knew he had the ring. We purchased the ring together (yes, I helped with the cost!). He did show my Dad the ring before he actually proposed and my Dad was shocked (I was present for this). </p> <p>The only thing I was traditional about was that I still wanted him to actually ask me to marry him rather than just handing me the ring as we walked out of the store. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1760001 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:05:53 +0000 MoonMoon 1760001@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Aw hell no, he knew better than that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759989 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 12:02:35 +0000 lemondrop 1759989@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He asked for their blessing- more for my expectation than theirs. He asked while meeting my dad and brother halfway between our houses since I was working and needed him to drop off our pets before a big conference we were going to. Amazingly enough, they kept it a secret for an entire month- unheard of! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759979 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:59:28 +0000 renee 1759979@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, and I'm happy he didn't. He actually asked me once if he had to ask my dad if he wanted to propose. I told him no, my dad would think it was strange because I had been living independently from my family and living with my then-BF for years. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759972 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:57:16 +0000 mrs. wagon 1759972@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes! And my parents said no! Haha. They knew we were going to get married, but they wanted us to wait. To be fair, we were only 23 years old, and they had JUST paid for half my brother's wedding, and my dad had just been laid off. But 2 hours later, Wagon Sr. had charmed and convinced them. Haha. </p> <p>They said no when my brother told them he was going to propose to his girlfriend, too...!! They made him wait a year. Wagon Sr. knew I didn't want to wait.... he is very convincing!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759953 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:53:01 +0000 oliviaoblivia 1759953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: totally let the cat out of the bag. luckily they laugh about it. As he was reading it he got to the last word and was Ohhhhh...whoops. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759921 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:45:27 +0000 Adira 1759921@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: OMG, your dad spilled the beans to your sister!!! Too funny!!! Did she immediately figure out what BIL wanted to talk to him about?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759902 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:40:11 +0000 birdofafeather 1759902@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH took my parents out to dinner to ask for their blessing, not permission. but my dad told me, oh yeah [BF] is coming up for dinner tomorrow... and i was like, that's weird. ha. so i knew it was coming. ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759870 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:32:33 +0000 oliviaoblivia 1759870@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm surprised so many SO's asked!<br /> DH didn't. I didn't expect him to. I always thought that marriage is an adult decision that I should be making for myself.</p> <p>I talked with my mom about it after and she said that she and my dad never expected him to because that's not how our relationship works. </p> <p>My BIL asked my dad when he proposed to my sister. Funny story, he asked my dad to lunch over text and my dad read the "I'd like to talk to you about some important things" text out-loud in front of my sister. Not so much with the secrets in my family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759860 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:29:48 +0000 HappyBluebird 1759860@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes he did, he asked both my dad and mom! I know its not for everyone and for us it was more of asking for their blessing rather than permission. I'm very happy he did and I know my parents were too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759851 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:26:15 +0000 JessKas 1759851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, and I would not have been ok with it. The whole thing creeps me out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759823 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:20:29 +0000 looch 1759823@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband called my parents to let them know what was happening, I think he felt obligated because they'd only met a few times and are a plane ride apart. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759788 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:07:52 +0000 lovehoneybee 1759788@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, and given my relationship with my father I would have been annoyed if he had. He did ask for the blessing of my surrogate mother, though (or at least informed her of his intentions). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759784 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:07:00 +0000 sandy 1759784@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/did-youyour-so-ask-dad-for-permission/page/2#post-1759776 Tue, 15 Jul 2014 11:04:25 +0000 blackbird 1759776@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope! It was not important to me at all. I just don't see it as any of his business or place. </p>