https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 19 May 2026 23:37:01 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2619187 Sat, 10 Sep 2016 00:04:41 +0000 lamariniere 2619187@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We each talk to our own parents. I'm very direct with my dad while my DH seems to always need me to prod him before he'll bring up something with his parents. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2619065 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 19:58:21 +0000 alphagam84 2619065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have no problems telling my parents if they mess up, they haven't besides one or two minor things, but I know they'd be responsive to anything. They've never once questioned what we're doing and just act interested in what we're doing. My husband isn't great about confronting his parents so I'd probably have to do it but they don't get to watch DD so nothing has really come up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2619018 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 19:23:29 +0000 MrsRcCar 2619018@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can tell my parents when they mess up. My mom is pretty good. My dad needs a little more reminding. </p> <p>My FIL is extremely respectful and great with our kids. I wouldn't have trouble letting him know if he messed up tho. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2619014 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 19:19:58 +0000 maddyz 2619014@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom is very good at listening and watching how we parent and also I have a huge amount of respect for her way with kids. I would say something if it came up, but nothing has.</p> <p>IL are another story, it's going to be a long time before we leave the kids with them for any amount of time. They just aren't up to it. We have already had a few conversations about guns in the house and I continue to worry about then all actually getting locked up. Lo1 is a very curious guy and will get his hands on things you never thought he could/would. This will continue to be a hard topic. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618999 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 19:01:50 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2618999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When it comes to LO, DH can be very clear and very direct with his parents. I haven't had any problems doing the same with mine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618981 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 18:16:04 +0000 Anagram 2618981@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I'm better at this than DH, so it's a good thing neither of our parents oversteps too much or does really terrible things with our kids.</p> <p>One time ever, my MIL, while well intentioned, overstepped seriously and I was extremely angry and then DH talked to her about it the next day. But it was wayyyyy overstepping, so he really had to. Thankfully that was like, over 2 years ago and nothing has ever happened since. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618976 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 18:00:56 +0000 IRunForFun 2618976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm dreading this. DH is terrible with confronting his parents about anything and his mom is awful about always being right and knowing best. I'm pregnant now and she's already talked about setting up a 35+ year old drop-side crib at their place for when we have baby there or she's watching baby. Off the cuff I made a comment that those cribs aren't up to safety standards and she did the eye roll and "Well, all 3 of MY kids used it and turned out fine." I talked to DH about it afterward and he was kind of like "I'm not saying anything," so if it comes up again I know I will have to be the one to be firm. There are other things I can see them doing as well, like not paying attention to car seat rules, etc. I am hoping we just don't have occasion to leave baby with them for any extended period of time. </p> <p>My parents, I'd totally be fine saying something, but I don't think I have much to worry about. They're great with me niece and nephew. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618974 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 17:52:32 +0000 codeitall 2618974@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It helps that we don't live close to either set of parents, but since DS was the first grandkid on both sides, it has been a learning experience.</p> <p>We powwow after the fact and come up with a response that won't damage relationships, but gets the point across. Then give it to our own parents.</p> <p>Like my MIL giving my 1 year old sips of her Diet Coke. Not OK in my book and I had to convince DH to tell her that it wasn't good for him and she couldn't do it. He was all 'What's the harm?' but I convinced him why it was bad and then he had to talk to MIL.</p> <p>I don't know if it is a mother-son thing; my MIL is just super sensitive about any criticism and is obese, so any health topic seems super-charged, even if it is really about my toddler.</p> <p>Talking to my parents seems a lot easier, but then again, I haven't had to tell them to stop doing anything. I've told my siblings, but they don't have kids, so I paint it that way and it goes just fine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618916 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 15:58:05 +0000 youboots 2618916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We each deal with our own parents for unpleasant conversations. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618912 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 15:45:34 +0000 caterw 2618912@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We each have serious conversations with our own parents. My folks overstep a bit because we lived with them when DD was born- I have given them a couple gentle reminders to reign it in and they are quite responsive. We also share a similar parenting style to my parents so they don't tend to do things that enrage us... My ILs parent very differently than we do (DH deliberately does NOT want to raise his kids the same as he was brought up and we are 100% on the same page) and they love to totally disregard the rules we lay out that they don't think are necessary. DH has had to give them the smackdown several times about healthy eating, safe sleeping practices, etc. They take DH more seriously than me which is annoying but at least they listen when he talks to them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-conversations-with-your-parents-or-inlaws#post-2618875 Fri, 09 Sep 2016 14:24:33 +0000 BSB 2618875@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If one of your parents or in-laws made a mistake that concerned the safety of your kids or pets, would you or your SO be able to have the difficult conversation to tell them how they messed up?</p> <p>Could your SO have the conversation with his mom or dad?</p> <p>I can certainly have the conversation with my parents and tell them if they messed up. We don't have a super close relationship and I will tell my parents if they messed up. I don't make excuses. If you guys know my background, I certainly got mad at my aunt and uncle (and haven't spoken to them since... they refused to apologize and don't think they did anything wrong) when the whole vitamin C debacle earlier this year. </p> <p>DH struggles with this. Not sure if this is a mother and son thing. I need him to tell his mom that she messed up. Yes, I can also tell her but I need him to do it, too.</p> <p>Do you have this problem? Or do you both have no problems talking to the grandparents. </p>