https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 15 Apr 2026 15:56:47 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-802402 Thu, 23 May 2013 05:12:52 +0000 Andrea 802402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am so sorry. I also voted to attend the funeral. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-802362 Thu, 23 May 2013 01:23:10 +0000 mrbee 802362@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go to the funeral. Maybe you could get together with some daycare friends later to have a second farewell party? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-802360 Thu, 23 May 2013 01:08:28 +0000 googly-eyes 802360@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends on how close the friend was to me, honestly. If it were more of an acquaintance I'd go to lo's program and then to the thing on the weekend, but if it were a good friend then I'd go to the funeral. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-802158 Wed, 22 May 2013 21:01:12 +0000 Boogs 802158@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go to the funeral. If it was my LO's high school graduation or something, then I wouldn't miss that. But, in this case I don't think you'll regret choosing to go to the funeral. Best of luck with what you decide either way! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-802130 Wed, 22 May 2013 20:47:52 +0000 doodlepoodle 802130@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>First off, I am so very sorry for your loss. :( Big hugs coming your way!! </p> <p>I didn't vote because quite honestly, I'm torn for you. I saw the preschool graduation at the daycare at my work today and got teary eyed thinking about Jacob eventually being there, so today I think about that, but I know that my friends are unbelievably special to me and there really is only one time to say goodbye to your friend. I really do like the idea of someone taping the program for you! I hope there's someone who could do that for you.</p> <p>I'm sorry I'm no help. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-802097 Wed, 22 May 2013 20:34:18 +0000 LovelyPlum 802097@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so sorry for your loss. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800514 Wed, 22 May 2013 11:21:52 +0000 Pirouette 800514@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i'm gonna go against most of the others and say go to the memorial on saturday, unless you were really close with the friend and the family would expect you to attend both. when there's a funeral and a memorial, i think it's perfectly acceptable to attend one and not both, unless you're family or practically family. </p> <p>i'm really sorry for your loss and for your tough decision! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800399 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:52:23 +0000 Foodnerd81 800399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it depends on how close you were to this friend. I would actually be more inclined to go to the memorial on Saturday and go to LO's end of year thing on Friday. I guess... that's what I would want my friends to do if it was my funeral, which is kind of weird to say. I also tend to think funerals are more for extremely close friends and family, and the wake is more for general friends, but I might be in the minority on that.</p> <p>I'm sorry for your loss. That's terrible news and must be really heard. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800367 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:43:30 +0000 pui 800367@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Were both you and your husband close to your lost friend? If you were close but he wasn't really, perhaps dad can go to the end of the year program while you attend the funeral? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800362 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:41:32 +0000 NovBaby1112 800362@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am so sorry :( I would go to the funeral, like others have said </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800355 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:39:19 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 800355@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rahlyrah: I like this.<br /> Maybe a grandparent can take her and video tape it.</p> <p>I wouldn't miss a last chance to say goodbye and honor the life of a friend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800330 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:27:31 +0000 winniebee 800330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd go to the funeral b/c your LO is still so young and won't know the difference. It will be hard to miss that event, but you may regret not going to the funeral. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800325 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:26:03 +0000 PurplePumps 800325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go to the funeral. A memorial/get together with family and friends is not the same as seeing him one last time and saying your own good bye to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800311 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:23:10 +0000 regberadaisy 800311@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is it an open casket? When is the burial? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800256 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:13:10 +0000 Ra 800256@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is there another family member who can attend the end-of-year program? Perhaps they could tape it for you so you can still see it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800230 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:06:58 +0000 plantains 800230@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go to the funeral for sure. There will be so many more end of year things, but this is the only funeral for your friend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800228 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:06:45 +0000 wahine08 800228@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm really, really sorry for your loss. I would go to the funeral and celebrate your daughter's special occasion at a later time. I think you'll need the time to grieve and say goodbye to your friend. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800224 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:06:02 +0000 MamaMoose 800224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would go to the funeral. Your LO is still so young she won't remember this anyway. You'll have many more chances to go to her school programs. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800223 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:05:52 +0000 mrsjazz 800223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd definitely go to the funeral instead of the end-of-year program. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800221 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:05:23 +0000 mediagirl 800221@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think it really comes down to what you feel comfortable with. Do you feel comfortable not going to the funeral and just going to the memorial that is the next day? It sounds like you were pretty close to your friend. I think I would skip the end of year thing and go to the funeral. Your lo won't really know the difference either way. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800215 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:04:34 +0000 loveisstrange 800215@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd go to the funeral. To me, saying goodbye to a friend is more important. There will be more school events. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/difficult-decision-which-would-you-choose#post-800208 Wed, 22 May 2013 10:03:15 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 800208@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I lost a friend last Friday in a motorcycle accident. The funeral is tomorrow at 4pm, and it's over an hour away from where I live. Tomorrow also happens to be the day of my daughter's first end-of-year program at her daycare. I feel awful, but I'm torn between going and seeing her program and saying goodbye to my friend. </p> <p>They are having a memorial/get together on Saturday for those who can't make it to the funeral, so I was thinking of going to that and sending flowers for the funeral, but it doesn't seem right to not be at the funeral. </p>