https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 25 May 2026 21:28:49 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251621 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 08:21:12 +0000 Clementine 251621@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251611 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 08:14:04 +0000 regberadaisy 251611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Clementine: I expect M's caregivers to be SUPER humans!<br /> &lt;please insert non serious tone&gt; </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251609 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 08:13:13 +0000 Clementine 251609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>what a tough situation. my hearts aches for you. let's hope she was having a bad day because she's human and some unannounced visits will help confirm this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251603 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 08:06:03 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 251603@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251582 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 07:53:40 +0000 regberadaisy 251582@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Sunglasses: yea, after we came down our initial parent mama/papa bear mode we decided we'll just monitor things extra carefully from now on. But the next time my husband gets a whiff of something he doesn't like he's saying something immediately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251579 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 07:51:46 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 251579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly it's tough because I put myself in their shoes and couldn't do their job. On the other hand they shouldn't have to lash out but I know it's easier said then done. I would kinda make unexpected stops to see how things were. If it happens again then I would say something. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251578 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 07:51:01 +0000 regberadaisy 251578@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks everyone!</p> <p>I have asked my husband to make unannounced visits before even before this occurrence. He's gone by earlier than usual to pick her up before etc. I think after this I'll really push for him to make a few more unannounced visits.</p> <p>I mean in all likelihood it probably is nothing. But you can't help but wonder "what if" especially when it's <i>your</i> child.</p> <p>We have both definitely been exasperated and uttered those same words before. But when it's someone else that is caring for our child on a day to day basis it opens the door to a lot of doubt.</p> <p>@mrstilly: I actually started to look into this last night to see if the center has had any past complaints. I never thought to check because my husband's cousin works there and i trust her explicitly. That if the center was bad in any way she would not have worked there for so long. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251569 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 07:43:06 +0000 purrpletulips 251569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with @Thehistoryofus and other posters who've suggest drop-in visits if possible. I know I've heard similar statements in our daycare but they are usually in response to one worker talking to another about something that happened and not necessarily directed at a child. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251554 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 07:26:42 +0000 Mrsbells 251554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: Sorry you are going through this. This week I also went to pick my LO and she was crying and I think being ignored. Once they saw me they all came running to her and kept repeating over and over that she "just woke up" and jut started crying. Its very hard to trust that other people are caring for your baby the way you want them to but like previous posters have said even we as mommies get frustrated with our babies sometimes.. but its eally difficult to see someone else vent their frustation at your baby. Its just so hard and there is really no fool-proof solution because you truly never know what goes on when you arent there. I am planning to drop by unannounced, but that still wont ease my worry </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251544 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 07:19:10 +0000 cvbee 251544@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What an interesting issue and I think you've gotten great advice here from everyone. You will have to update us. </p> <p>I know kindergarten and infant care are different but thought I'd say that I've been a kindergarten teacher many times, and I would definitely say what she said only in the staff room, but never ever in the classroom because I think that is inappropriate for children to hear. My 2 cents. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251516 Wed, 08 Aug 2012 06:09:58 +0000 mrstilly 251516@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I said those exact words and was very frustrated when my son managed to fling all the food off his tray last night onto the floor. I'm sure I've also felt and spoken similarly about diaper leaks, spit ups, and the like. </p> <p>But at the same time if I heard my daycare say the exact words that I have to DS I would be concerned also. With daycare there is the unknown element. I would do a couple pop in visits. You can also call the licensing agency and ask if they've done a recent check (anonymously) or see if they can spot check as well. I'd be inclined to believe that at a daycare center with multiple teachers that your LO is fine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251433 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 22:32:25 +0000 brownie 251433@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sorry. This sounds very disconcerting. I agree with PP on going in and observing more often. I know with my very fussy baby, I am glad I was able to get in home care with few kids (a SAHM friend with one 4 year old). He was able to get the extra attention he needed.</p> <p>Take heart, your baby will grow out of the fussy eventually. Well, then they have something else happen (like teeth or terrible 2's). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251417 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 22:05:08 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 251417@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Thehistoryofus: good suggestion.</p> <p>I walked into my daughter's classroom once to hear one of the teachers speaking more harshly than I would have expected to another little girl. I got wary of that teacher for a little while, but observed her closely for a couple of weeks and saw nothing of concern. She literally had one off moment where she told a little girl to hurry up in a harsh tone. Observation will either reassure you or raise your level of concern appropriately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251393 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 21:26:18 +0000 T.H.O.U. 251393@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe have a few unannounced drop ins to check thins over. When I read the story I could see how someone might say something like "are you freaking kidding me, you Pooped Again" but not really meaning anything to the baby just voicing my frustrations. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251391 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 21:22:18 +0000 polkadots 251391@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@regberadaisy: It can be frustrating sometimes If the caregiver is having a hard day... or the little ones are having a hard day. I wouldn't be too worried since it sounds like your LO is in a childcare center. At centers there are plenty people around to help and watch. (at the center I worked at there were cameras and a viewing room for parents) I would be more concerned to hear this if it was a home daycare with one caregiver and multiple children. Hopefully its nothing and wasn't toward your LO, maybe keep a closer eye when your picking up or if you can make surprise visits. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251349 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 20:16:44 +0000 Mrs.B 251349@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a daycare provider it does get frustrating at times. As long as she wasn't saying anything in a angry or nasty tone I wouldn't put to much into it. She probably had a long day and I think as Mom's we can all relate to that and the frustration it can bring at times. I would recommend making some pop in visits while LO is at daycare in the next few weeks if at all possible. If after a few surprise visits she seems to be doing ok then I would suggest stopping the pop ins because it can really mess up your LO's routine at daycare. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251338 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 20:06:23 +0000 regberadaisy 251338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When she gets fussy she can get very very loud and I understand how it can get frustrating. Because we've been there too but then we're on a one to one basis where they are not.</p> <p>They asked for the 3rd time today regarding a pacifier which tells me she probably was quite fussy today. And she tends to fuss when she's given formula. So there's that dilemma. We've been upfront with them on our use of pacis. We only typically use it in the car because there's nothing else we can do. But she consistently spits it out many times before finally taking it. At home there's been a few times where she was so fussy we resorted to trying a paci and she refuses it at home! I'm very reluctant to give them a paci at daycare because I'm afraid they will just use it ALL THE TIME. You keep jamming a paci in a baby's mouth and yeah they're eventually going to take it. And that's not what we want. But then is that a lesser evil than having them get frustrated and irate with her??<br /> It's a different story if she always takes a paci at home. I just feel like we shouldn't have to resort to a paci to calm her down if she doesn't need it at home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251327 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 19:45:34 +0000 pinkcupcake 251327@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would definitely talk to your husband's cousin... how upsetting :( :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251274 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:46:36 +0000 Mrs. Pen 251274@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>oh my... that is hard! I never want anyone getting frusttrated with DS even if he is frustrating at times!! I would definitely ask them about it but TRY not to assume the worst :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251252 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:23:25 +0000 regberadaisy 251252@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@tequiero21: agreed which is why I made sure to make the distinction in the post. As did my husband when he was explaining the situation.</p> <p>@BoogieBea: We regularly do bc she can be quite a fussy child. And they have told us in the past if she has been. I don't think my husband asked today because he wasn't sure how to approach the situation.</p> <p>@yoursilverlining: I guess we can't be 100% sure because we were not in the room at that exact time. But knowing my husband and how perceptive he is I can say I'm 90% sure it was directed at M. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251249 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:21:11 +0000 chopsuey 251249@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>:( that stinks..<br /> Your Lo's still so young.. What could she have done to frustrate them so? -.- I would definitely talk to her or your husband's cousin.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251247 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:19:34 +0000 yoursilverlining 251247@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Are you 100% sure what the teacher said was directed towards your daughter, and not said in conversation about something with the other teacher in the room? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251245 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:18:08 +0000 BoogieBea 251245@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe you can ask them if LO has been extra fussy lately. Maybe that will get them to tell you what's been frustrating them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251243 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:12:39 +0000 tequiero21 251243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Can't say exactly since I haven't been in the situation... But I think its ok to be frustrated. Not ok to be angry... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/disconcerting-news-re-daycare#post-251233 Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:01:16 +0000 regberadaisy 251233@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband picks our daughter up from daycare every day about the same time. Today as he was rounding the corner to her room he heard her crying. Then he heard one of the teachers say "are you freaking kidding me". In a frustrated tone, not angry. Then another one of the teacher whisper Ssomething to her because she saw my husband. Then they were both extra nice which is disconcerting to us bc when people act extra nice it's a sign of guilt.</p> <p>The odd thing is the teacher is one of the ones that have taken a real liking to M.</p> <p>So we are contemplating whether we should say something to that teacher privately. Or give her the benefit of the doubt and maybe it was a one time deal and she was just having a bad day? But then what if it's not the first time she's 'lashed' out at our daughter?</p> <p>On the other hand my husband's cousin and daughter work there. And I know during their lunch &amp; breaks they often go hang out with her. If its happened before I don't see his cousin not saying something?</p> <p>What would you do?</p> <p>I would say I was concerned enough that during tonight's bath I was a bit extra careful and checking for bruises... </p>