https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 05 May 2026 08:03:05 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699725 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 14:51:12 +0000 prettylizy 699725@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@knockedup_nowwhat: If I could have convinced DH to be a more active student without the classes, I might have skipped them. He doesn't listen to me that well though! lol! Having someone else say it all made a huge difference. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699716 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 14:48:37 +0000 JoJoGirl 699716@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@knockedup_nowwhat: We did a childbirth class AND are having a doula. I feel like the class is Childbirth 101 while the doula is having the professor there. For the final exam the professor will be invaluable, but doesn't mean I should skip class entirely :) It was helpful to know what to expect, learn some massage techniques etc., know what to expect at the hospital, but the doula will be valuable day-of. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699697 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 14:44:22 +0000 knockedup_nowwhat 699697@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@prettylizy: Yep, I do really feel like the classes will be mostly for DH because he is not a big reader and prefers to learn more hands-on.</p> <p>@Mrs. Chalk: Thanks for your perspective! I did talk to someone this weekend who used the same midwife group / hospital as us, and they said their doula was invaluable. I've also heard from several people now in a Facebook group that the midwives in our practice can get very busy, and if you think you need a lot of hands-on support, a doula is the way to go. That is really what is making me strongly consider it! Awesome to hear that you were able to do without though. I'm definitely going to ask at our next appointment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699479 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:45:58 +0000 Mrs. Chalk 699479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@knockedup_nowwhat: I am actually going to be somewhat of a dissenting voice here. I've had two natural births (both in the hospital), but haven't had a doula with either one. </p> <p>My first birth, I was with an OB and just used my husband and the nurse for support. The second birth (this past January), I was with a group midwife practice. The midwife was SO hands-on during the birth that I really can't even imagine what more I could have needed from a doula. </p> <p>Have you asked the midwives what they think? I found it really helpful to hear their perspectives; they definitely were able to explain to me what they would be able to do for me versus what a doula might offer, etc. I also had a short birth with my first, and was anticipating the same with my second, so that made a difference as well. If I anticipated laboring at home for a long time, the doula may have been a much greater help.</p> <p>All this to say: do what feels right for you, ask around at your midwife group, talk to other people who have given birth at your hospital, and figure out what makes sense financially as well. I totally respect the work of doulas, and think they can be invaluable, but I also think (and am proof) that natural birth can be achievable without that additional support. Good luck! </p> <p>(I actually wrote a post about this as well: <a href="http://www.hellobee.com/2013/02/06/the-great-doula-debate/)" rel="nofollow">http://www.hellobee.com/2013/02/06/the-great-doula-debate/)</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699305 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:08:57 +0000 prettylizy 699305@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We took our childbirth class through our Doula (she does both) so we got a reduced rate for all of her services. A lot of the info in the childbirth classes was redundant for me (thanks HB!) but DH took away SOOO much information that he never would have absorbed no matter how much I gabbed or asked him to 'read this please'.So worth it for that alone. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699283 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:03:04 +0000 DillonLion 699283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@knockedup_nowwhat: Not really. I was voracious for information so I was all about as many classes/books/etc. as possible. </p> <p>But by the time the actual class rolled around, I was super swollen and uncomfortable, so the sheer act of sitting in a chair for 4+ hours was really draining and miserable. And there wasn't much learned in the class that I couldn't find online or by calling the hospital to ask about their specific procedures. </p> <p>I did enjoy the other specific classes that we took: breastfeeding, car seat safety, infant CPR, and DH did a daddy boot camp class. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-699270 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 12:57:08 +0000 knockedup_nowwhat 699270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks for your feedback everyone! You all - and a couple we hung out with this weekend - really have me convinced!</p> <p>Now the question is, do we really need a full childbirth class AND a doula? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691726 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 13:02:23 +0000 SAHM0811 691726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Since you're not sure if it's worth it, how about hiring a doula who is close to certification and needs experience hours? That will lower the cost. We did that and I'm really glad we did. She was an invaluable support. My DH was wonderful while I was in labor, but I knew that having another person there would help us both. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691716 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 12:58:46 +0000 heartonastring 691716@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Depends on you personally and your general situation.</p> <p>We interviewed a doula and considered it very seriously, but ultimately decided against it. I ended up getting into a midwifery practice and my midwife and her student will be with me non-stop during active labour. So between that and the fact that DH really wants to be my primary labour support we decided against it. Given that your midwife may not be with you the whole time, it sounds like it might be very worthwhile to consider a doula.</p> <p>The other factor you need to consider seriously is personality fit. We interviewed one doula and our personalities didn't mesh - she made DH feel like he would take a backseat to her, and obviously that wasn't okay with us. But absolutely, if you can find someone with whom you and your DH mesh well, I think it's a great thing to explore! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691714 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 12:57:40 +0000 rachiecakes 691714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't have a doula but I'm pretty private when it comes to stuff like this. I didn't even want DH touching or talking to me either. I just get "in the zone" and need to be really in tune with myself to get through things like this. But it's just me. A doula would've been totally wasted on me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691695 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 12:51:12 +0000 lawbee11 691695@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There are a handful of women in my office that planned to have unmedicated births and they all ended up getting epidurals. They all agree that a doula is essential next time, so I think if it's important to you then you should get one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691688 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 12:48:52 +0000 Sugar.Biscuit 691688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>All this talk about midwives &amp; doulas has me thinking I need to do more research. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691656 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 12:38:21 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 691656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I felt the same way at first... I wondered how essential a doula really was - I mean, was she just going to stand by and watch me give birth? But it was THE BEST DECISION we could've made!! No regrets and worth every penny. I even wrote an entire post about it - <a href="http://www.hellobee.com/2012/07/16/the-case-for-a-doula/" rel="nofollow">http://www.hellobee.com/2012/07/16/the-case-for-a-doula/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691646 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 12:33:13 +0000 ParkerHaus 691646@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>With that scenario I would say YES! We are birthing a birth center with a midwife practice where we will have the same midwife through our whole birth and we are still hiring a doula. </p> <p>Personally I couldn't imagine birthing in the hospital environment (even with a certified nurse midwife) and not having a doula. The doula stays with you when the nurse midwife might be checking on other patients. The doula can also provide support to your husband to help him be more supportive of you. Many Doulas have payment plans if $$ is holding you back. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691179 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:41:44 +0000 Foodnerd81 691179@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@knockedup_nowwhat: I'm in the exact same boat-- midwife practice with hospital birth, hoping for unmedicated labor, and debating whether or not we want a doula. </p> <p>I asked DH about it, because I think it would affect him a lot as well, and so far we are pretty much leaning towards not having one. My hospital and the midwife practice attract a lot of people who want as low intervention as possible, so my thinking is the nurses there are more knowledgeable about unmedicated births than at other hospitals. We are also taking a one day 'preparing for childbirth with a midwife' class. That said, I'm still not sure if it is the right decision or not!</p> <p>I also asked my midwife about it, and she actually works as a doula as well and said she thought one of the big benefits of having one is that they will come to the house while you labor at home, which obviously no one at the hospital can do. </p> <p>For me, really, it's coming down to money and taking the time and energy to find one, so we will probably go without. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691140 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:35:16 +0000 maybebaby 691140@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are paying a $250 for an apprentice doula who has had all the training but needs to attend 3 births solo to get her full certification. We couldn't justify the expense of a more experienced one, but from the two prenatal visits we have had with her already it seems very worth it. I suggest looking into volunteer or apprentice doula programs if you are interested in it. I can't yet speak to the birth experience, but I feel much more comfortable with our plans to try for unmedicated with a doula on our team. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691121 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:32:17 +0000 lovehoneybee 691121@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't have a doula (but I wasn't trying for an unmedicated birth). However I did have my mother, who had been a childbirth coach for many years, and when my epidural stopped working she was right there coaching and supporting both me and DH and helping me stay focused and breathing out each contraction. DH was a wonderful cheerleader but my mother got me through it. </p> <p>So knowing that if I want to try for an unmedicated birth with a second LO if she couldn't come I would definitely hire a doula. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691117 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:30:29 +0000 JoJoGirl 691117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We hired a doula! I'm not due for another 7 weeks but to me it does feel 'essential'. Going to a childbirth class to us felt like the equivalent of one driver's ed class and then racing in the Indy 5000. How are we supposed to remember everything/know what to do/what's best etc? And who will help support my husband in his first time in such a scary role? We prefer the idea of having someone there with us to show us the ropes (in addition to a class). She is so awesome already and I'm thrilled she's going to be there with us :)</p> <p>ETA: I also have a midwife but it's true she may only be there for part of the time as she could have other patients. We wanted someone dedicated. Also, doulas are more familiar with laboring positions, massage techniques etc since mom's comfort is their job (vs. the midwife whose job is baby and mom's safety). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691105 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:27:14 +0000 mrskc 691105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would pick a doula over a childbirth class any day. My doula was 100% worth the cost and I really believe I would not have been able to go all natural with out her. I will not give birth now with out a doula. She was an amazing support to my DH as well. I know he was feeling a lot of pressure about getting me thru labor, and she really helped him and I both. He was ready to give into me and let me have the epi, but my doula really pushed me to keep going and in the end, I'm so glad she did! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691102 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:26:39 +0000 looch 691102@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I didn't have a doula, because the midwives that were "assigned" to me when I gave birth were with me the entire time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691100 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:26:17 +0000 Arden 691100@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>As a doula I'm totally biased, but ABSOLUTELY! I'll leave it at that. :)</p> <p>Feel free to ask any specific questions you may have about doulas. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691093 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:25:43 +0000 DillonLion 691093@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We loved our doula. They are experts in comfort measures and support during labor. They suggest different things to try depending on your specific situation (you will probably meet before the birth and she will get a good overview and background of your history and wants/needs for labor). They area also a good support system for DH. They can advise him when would be a good time to rest/take a nap/update family. And the doula can stay with you and be supportive while he is away briefly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691068 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:21:28 +0000 Weagle 691068@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We skipped childbirth classes and went for the doula. We don't regret it one bit. It was our best spent money for baby prep. In fact, DH loved having her there more than I did! She really was great in enabling him to be really supportive of me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-i-need-a-doula#post-691046 Thu, 04 Apr 2013 10:16:34 +0000 knockedup_nowwhat 691046@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I want to attempt an unmedicated birth in the hospital. I am going to a midwives practice, and DH &amp; I are going to go to a natural childbirth class. I honestly feel like that should be "enough." The expense of a doula does not seem worth it to me, and I'd honestly rather it be just me, DH, and the medical staff.</p> <p>Still, I keep reading about how essential doulas are, and I'm starting to wonder if I will regret not hiring one. The midwives do rotate like OBs, so if its a busy night, the midwife on call will not be able to be with us the whole time. I've heard the nurses at our hospital are usually great but you never know.</p> <p>What do you think? Should we hire a doula? </p>