https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 31 May 2026 05:35:05 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1650696 Thu, 22 May 2014 06:17:02 +0000 SugarplumsMom 1650696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Comments like that don't bother me at all. But when parent's of older children don't seem to remember what it was like to have a baby/toddler, it really pisses me off. Especially when they're assumptions about how "easy it should be", when in fact they themselves always had family helping. Grrrr. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1650682 Thu, 22 May 2014 06:06:42 +0000 Dandelion 1650682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sometimes when people see me with M, the "just you waits" come and then when I tell them I have another boy who is almost 7 and he was easy, they then go on to say how stressful my life will be with 2 boys...some people just have to put a negative spin on everything! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1650658 Thu, 22 May 2014 05:29:23 +0000 illumina 1650658@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It only bothers me if the tone is condescending/patronising. Like "you think this is hard now? just wait until she starts crawling, walking, throwing tantrums etc." in a sort of 'I've been there, I've dealt with all of that and I'm better than you' tone! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1650485 Wed, 21 May 2014 21:29:20 +0000 jedeve 1650485@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hate them!!! I think they are so rude, and completely discounting a person's current experience. </p> <p>I remember being in soooo much pain with SPD that I couldn't stand for more than a few minutes with my first pregnancy. I mentioned to my mom that it made it hard to cook dinner. She said, "just you wait - its so much harder with a baby!" Was it? No!</p> <p>Of course, there were some things people were right about. I was way more tired with a newborn than in my third trimester. But that doesn't mean I wasn't tired in the third trimester! There are definitely things that looking back, I wish I had appreciated more. I complained bout being unemployed and then just working pt with my first pregnancy. Now I'm like, "omg I had so much free time! I could do whatever I wanted every afternoon with no one else to worry about! What on earth was I complaining about??" But when I was talking to a friend about her first pregnancy, I didn't say "man just you wait till your second, it's way harder!" I mean, I'm not in her shoes. </p> <p>So sure, there are times my gut reaction is "oh just you wait." But telling someone to appreciate what they have now by discounting their current suffering and trials doesn't work and isn't helpful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649807 Wed, 21 May 2014 15:12:28 +0000 SnowLion 1649807@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It really depends on how it comes off. If I get annoyed I gently remind people that every stage has its own issues. What really gets me is when people judge because a toddler is having a breakdown. I've gotten a lot of comments from older women about learning to control your child. I just smile and say "I'm sure your children were always perfect angels." That usually shuts them up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649384 Wed, 21 May 2014 13:05:09 +0000 kjpugs 1649384@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hate them SO VERY MUCH. Every stage has good and bad parts. EVERY stage. Looking at someone and being envious of the good part you see, then making that type of comment, is just sh!tting on someone else to make yourself feel better or to feel like a martyr. That mom probably forgot the negatives of having to do so much for your child before they can feed themselves, or walk, and have to be carried about, and need to eat more often, etc etc or whatever struggles you may have. People who told me "get sleep while you can!" while I was pregnant CLEARLY forgot how painful pregnancy can be and the insomnia and discomfort and peeing every 2 hours. I just don't get why people need to bring others down to bring themselves up... since we're moms we're in the same boat.</p> <p>But good for you for taking it positively and not letting it frustrate you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649370 Wed, 21 May 2014 12:59:05 +0000 JennyPenny 1649370@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hate it! But I mostly get it from my own mom in response to ideas I have about how I want to try parenting. For example, I'll explain BLW to her and that I want to give it a try and she says "just you wait..." like it won't work out at all the way I hope. She says this for every parenting decision I discuss that's different from what she did....it's incredibly infuriating! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649190 Wed, 21 May 2014 11:49:05 +0000 hellocupcake 1649190@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I sometimes say it unintentionally. Like at the store a guy asked how old LO was and said he had a 10 month old. I told him how lucky he was she's not mobile yet. Meaning: Just wait until she's walking and you'll be running around like I am. But, I always try to follow up with a positive version. With him I told him just wait until she can run and play, it's also so much more fun..when you're not trying to stay in line at the store :) </p> <p>I think everyone does it, just some don't do it so negatively. Those are the ones that bother me. The "you won't be able to handle it" type comments. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649173 Wed, 21 May 2014 11:41:39 +0000 swurlygurl 1649173@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrain: @ScarletBegonia: I also slept so much better after the baby was born. I could not sleep for the last 5-8 weeks of pregnancy - I was miserable!</p> <p>I HATED them while I was pregnant, but don't mind them so much now. People just like to complain and project their misery onto other people - I'm sure I do it plenty too :)<br /> Plus it's helpful to know that some things aren't all they're cracked up to be - like walking. People started 'just-you-waiting' me about walking, so I made sure to soak up the bliss of the non-walking stage instead of rushing it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649157 Wed, 21 May 2014 11:34:51 +0000 farawayyama 1649157@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Typically they do. I don't need to constantly hear about how awful parenthood is. I am not an idiot - I assume there will be challenges, I don't need you to destroy the small amount of hope and anticipation I do have.</p> <p>Same as I always heard how awful marriage is. I naively listened to those comments and am pleasantly surprised as to how good it actually is! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649060 Wed, 21 May 2014 10:53:54 +0000 Honeygold89 1649060@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ElbieKay: I feel the same way </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1649050 Wed, 21 May 2014 10:52:02 +0000 Honeygold89 1649050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Some do and some don't. The one that bothers me and DH are the ones when people ask if he sleep good and then when we say yes they say oh just wait that'll change which we've been told since LO was born and he's still the same good baby </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you/page/2#post-1642680 Sun, 18 May 2014 10:38:01 +0000 PixieStix 1642680@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They annoy me because I feel like I have enough to worry about, and the "just you wait" comments feel like they're saying, "Haha, it gets worse!" Or "If you think this phase is bad, you ain't seen nothin' yet!" There's also a sense of showiness when some people say them, as if they're so proud of their knowledge and being "ahead" of you, that they can help but pipe up and share what they know. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642651 Sun, 18 May 2014 10:16:30 +0000 MoonMoon 1642651@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't get annoyed, either they're right (in which case I learn something), or they're wrong (in which case I get to be smug, haha!)</p> <p>Luckily I haven't heard those kinds of comments that much, so maybe they'd be more annoying if I did. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642625 Sun, 18 May 2014 09:53:47 +0000 mrsrain 1642625@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ScarletBegonia: Thanks for saying that! There's no telling what will happen, but I'm so glad to hear that it got better for SOMEONE! :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642525 Sun, 18 May 2014 08:08:28 +0000 Trailmix 1642525@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They don't bother me. Actually, I catch myself saying it sometimes :shocked: But I usually note how annoying it is to say it, so at least I hope that makes it less so, lol. And I try to say it for positive things, like just you wait until they're walking bc it's so much fun or whatever... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642507 Sun, 18 May 2014 07:29:29 +0000 SweetiePie 1642507@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It bothers me because often when I get them it either insinuates that my life will suck with an LO or they are "just you waits" about things I would never let my kid do anyway. </p> <p>I view it as one miserable parent trying to make other women miserable so they're not alone. Just because your kid is a little sh*t and runs around a funeral wake wiping his greasy hands down people's suits and on the widowers carpet doesn't mean mine will (in fact I can guarantee he won't). And I'm pretty sure that laughing as your son does it only perpetuates the issue.<br /> These are the type of people I get "just you wait" from. </p> <p>I also get it for changing dirty diapers and crying. Ok, yeah, I'm pretty sure that when we paid $25k for IVF after a 1.5 year wait to get pregnant, we knew our baby would poop and cry. Thanks. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642454 Sun, 18 May 2014 04:24:17 +0000 nana87 1642454@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Last night I told mil that lo fights going to sleep, and she said just wait... Ergh yes I know children often fight sleep, but my 6 week old only slept in 1 hr stretches the night before, then she's older and purposefully fighting it, it'll be annoying at bedtime but eventually there will be sleep! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642444 Sun, 18 May 2014 02:41:02 +0000 ScarletBegonia 1642444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsrain: If it makes you feel any better I'm sleeping much better with a 9 week old that I did when I was in my 2nd and 3rd trimester!! I quite loved being pregnant, to be honest, but I felt like I didn't sleep at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1642443 Sun, 18 May 2014 02:34:44 +0000 Mrs.Panda 1642443@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm 17 weeks pregnant and get the Just You Waits about how horrible I will feel in a couple of months. Have painful varicose veins? Just you wait until you're 9 months and all your veins in your legs are popping out! Already having bad sciatica? Just you wait until you're much bigger and you'll be in a whole lot more pain! Or just the plain "It gets worse". Thanks bitches. Like I didn't already know that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641785 Sat, 17 May 2014 14:06:15 +0000 blackbird 1641785@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends on how they're saying it, what it's in reference to, and how well I know them. The other week someone said it to me about E walking and I was like ummmm she's been walking for 3 months?....thanks stranger</p> <p>I really hate when I say I'm busy or tired and they go "just wait til you have two!" Yeah. Bite me asshole </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641780 Sat, 17 May 2014 14:01:57 +0000 Rockies11 1641780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hate hate them! I feel like they are untrue (or are only reflective of the speaker's experience) and are mean - like for the purpose of scaring the person in the moment. How is that a good piece of conversation? All the "just you wait" people when I was pregnant are now, since I have become a mom and am having a great time, are now saying "just you wait until she's a teenager". Just, like, can it, people and let me live in the moment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641763 Sat, 17 May 2014 13:31:25 +0000 Modern Daisy 1641763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think they're a little condescending. And I don't like the negative connotation either. Overall I feel it's unnecessary to "warn" someone about how horrible things are definitely about to be for them. When people say it to me I always smile, nod and wink but I roll my eyes when they walk away. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641759 Sat, 17 May 2014 13:23:44 +0000 StbHisMrs 1641759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Dandelion: Same here. If I take just the baby I get all kinds of "you don't know what you're in for", or "is she walking yet? Well enjoy it now, cause you'll never sit down again" type comments. I look at them and smile, then tell them I also have a 12 year old and a 2.5 year old, they stop! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641744 Sat, 17 May 2014 13:10:41 +0000 mrsrain 1641744@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It always feels like "just you wait" comments minimize the current experience. I posted on FB one day that I was exhausted, after being unable to sleep most of the night thanks to pregnancy aches and pains. The "just you wait" and "enjoy what you have while you have it" comments pissed me off! Yes, I understand that things will be different, maybe even harder, later, but comments like that make me feel like my current discomforts or feelings are worthless. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641743 Sat, 17 May 2014 13:09:52 +0000 meganmp 1641743@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends on why they're doing it- sometimes, people (with one kid, mind you) would warn me that we wouldn't be able to go out and do things at all. Guess what? We did. When we would go out, people would say, "Oh, just wait until they're walking, you won't be able to go out with them anymore." Guess what? We are. If they are said with condescension or are implying that I'm an idiot and I don't know what I'm doing- those make me mad. The well intentioned ones? No biggie. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641728 Sat, 17 May 2014 12:42:36 +0000 spaniellove 1641728@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It tends to annoy me because the kind of person who says this (in a negative context) often has other negative things to say in general. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641688 Sat, 17 May 2014 12:05:55 +0000 wonderstruck 1641688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Applesandbananas: I'm getting the same thing with crawling! "Just you wait, you think you want but he'll be into everything and you'll hate it and blah blah blah." Well, he's been crawling for several weeks now, and I continue to be super excited to see him progressing and being so proud of himself for being able to chase after his toys and get where he wants to go. Yes, it requires attention and re-directing on my part, but it beats the heck out of watching him be SO frustrated like he has been the last several months when he wanted to crawl but just couldn't figure it out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641609 Sat, 17 May 2014 10:40:02 +0000 Applesandbananas 1641609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO has been making progress with walking and I've gotten so many just you waits about that. I'm really excited for him to be walking, so it kind of annoys me. Like they're intentionally trying to rain on my parade. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-just-you-wait-comments-bother-you#post-1641564 Sat, 17 May 2014 10:07:15 +0000 autumnlove 1641564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They usually bother me.</p> <p>@MrsTiz: you just described me! I can't wait! :-) </p>