https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 14 Apr 2026 10:43:19 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-916244 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 14:36:52 +0000 mrs. wagon 916244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Considering we don't have yard work (our landlord sends landscapers) this is a little tough to gauge for us. But for the most part we both just do the work we like to do (or what the other is really not good at). I cook and clean and do laundry. He takes out the trash and vacuums. I do all the prep work for the kids and he does most of the hands-on stuff. We're both always doing something! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-916224 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 14:34:32 +0000 Rescuemom10 916224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not really much at all. We both cook. Sometimes him more than I. We both clean. We both do outside work with a few acres to maintain and what not its a must. I think most of the tools in our garage I actually bought.<br /> With him being gone and when he is deployed, well then obviously I do it all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-916204 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 14:31:55 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 916204@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yep! He works more and I'm home more so I do 90% of the cooking and cleaning. He tends to the yard, cars, and trash. If he needs help outside, he asks and I help. The same goes for me inside. Neither of us will refuse to do something just because the other usually takes care of it. </p> <p>I'm curious to see how it will be balanced when we have a LO. I'm hoping he'll be in charge of as much of the nighttime routine as possible since he'll be gone most of the day. That way he can get some quality time in with the baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-916165 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 14:24:09 +0000 LuLu Mom 916165@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes for the most part. I do cooking, he does yard work, we split the cleaning and the baby raising :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-916159 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 14:22:16 +0000 mrsmate 916159@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, we are totally divided along gender lines. I can't really complain. DH just rebuilt our deck almost single-handedly. He does a lot of stuff like that, so I don't mind making dinner and vacuuming.</p> <p>Yesterday I suggested he comb DD's hair and put it in a ponytail before he takes her out in the mornings (on weekends). He said, no that's women's work! He was only half-joking. We need to have a talk about that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915945 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:38:10 +0000 Sugar.Biscuit 915945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not really. I do most of the lawn work, cook &amp; clean the upstairs, deal with insurance, run errands &amp; he does the laundry, pays bills &amp; cleans down stairs. I'm the body, he is the brains. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915936 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:36:14 +0000 mrsjazz 915936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For the majority of tasks we do conform to gender stereotypes but I'm a way better cook than he is so I don't mind cooking. And he's definitely the garbage man. </p> <p>For the majority of our relationship he did all the laundry but we both do it now. He does bath time with LO but I put her to bed and do all the night time waking stuff. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915910 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:31:51 +0000 MrsF 915910@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In the household chores, sort of. DH mows the lawn, BBQs, car-related things and I do most of the cooking and cleaning (I'm also home more than he is). In the kid related tasks, DH is way more involved than the traditional role I suppose. He can and does do everything I can do with M - sometimes better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915900 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:29:28 +0000 Koolbreeze 915900@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Kinda. He cuts the grass and does most outside stuff, but I do help some. And he does the cooking and most of the laundry. I do all the inside cleaning, the light stuff and the deep cleaning. Parenting is evenly split when he's home though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915895 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:29:00 +0000 Caly 915895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Pretty mixed! He does do all the yard work, I tend to clean the bathrooms, he usually does the laundry. I pay the bills, we both cook &amp; clean. When the twins arrive later this year he'll be the SAHD. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915864 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:24:08 +0000 Mrsbells 915864@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mostly.. I do a lot of the cooking and the kitchen stuff, he does laundry and garbage and cleaning the bathroom. but we fold laundry together.. he also does dishes.. I dont know if that fits the stereotype or not </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915856 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:22:04 +0000 lilteacherbee 915856@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Kinda. But he does all the cooking! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915848 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:19:51 +0000 mediagirl 915848@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sort of, I guess. He does the yard work and I do laundry. We share everything else, though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915839 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 13:18:50 +0000 heffalump 915839@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Totally. He does all the handy man things around the house, takes out the trash, deals with yard work, etc. I cook and take care of LO, the laundry, etc. We have a cleaning lady but we're both pretty tidy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915640 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 12:44:00 +0000 BoogieBea 915640@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope, it varies for us. We chip in with everything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915638 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 12:42:43 +0000 MrsStormy 915638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For many things yes, but not for all, and when the baby comes I really doubt we will have traditional parenting roles, I think DH will be very actively involved, he would love to be SAHD. I do most of indoor cleaning, including laundry (although its not uncommon for me to ask him to do the floors or something if I'm too busy), he cleans the kitchen, does all the dishes and such, and we probably split cooking 50% some seasons he cooks more and some I do, he does all the outside yard work though, except for plants, I have to water the plants. </p> <p>I think we have split things up the way we like them to be split- things we each prefer to do or dislike and it just happens to be somewhat traditional. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915553 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 12:14:45 +0000 MamaJ 915553@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH cooks and I do dishes, cleaning, etc. He does the yard and garage. I'm the one that sits down and pays the bills, but he works and I stay at home. So we are a mix I think. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915538 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 12:10:17 +0000 cavalierkcs 915538@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We both cook, but DH always cleans the kitchen afterwards. He also does a lot of the housework since he's home more. So, I guess we don't follow the stereotypes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915444 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:43:29 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 915444@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're all mixed up with our gender roles (if you consider traditional splits to still be relevant in modern society). My daughters think daddies stay home while mamas work at the hospital. I laughed last night, though, when Mr. Jacks was outside BBQing and I was inside cleaning. I thought'how very traditional of us'. But I'm not going to go out of my way just to spite traditional gender roles either ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915439 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:42:01 +0000 IRunForFun 915439@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. Not at all. He does the laundry, he scrubs the bathrooms, he does the ironing, he does the grocery shopping, we both wash the dishes, we both cook, I vacuum, and I do the gardening. In some ways we split traditionally gendered chores equally, in others we do the opposite of what is traditional. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915421 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:37:18 +0000 HLK208 915421@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For now, yes. DH works and I stay home with the kids and try to take care of the house. He does cook though and helps with laundry.</p> <p>In a few years it will be different when I go back to work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915409 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:35:12 +0000 Adira 915409@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, definitely not. We split the cooking, though Hubs usually does the dishes. We both take out the trash. I usually clean the toilets, though Hubs will if I ask him to. We both do laundry. We both mow the lawn. We both vacuum. And neither of us take care of our cars - the mechanics do that for us!</p> <p>As far as parenting, I probably do more, but not a whole lot more. Since we're breastfeeding, I handle all the feeding, but Hubs helps out a lot, ESPECIALLY if I'm sick. Then he handles all night wake-ups unless Xander's hungry. We both change diapers, give him a bath, and Hubs does daycare drop-off and I do pick-up. And we both play with him (though Hubs probably plays with him more than me). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915408 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:34:55 +0000 lovehoneybee 915408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hmm...well, as far as household stuff, yes. I take care of the house--his chores are taking out the garbage and cleaning the cat boxes (and mowing the lawn, which he enjoys doing). He'll do other things if I specifically ask him to do them, although he'll occasionally take the initiative to do the dishes or something. I do everything else--cleaning, cooking, laundry, etc. </p> <p>As far as parenting I'm a SAHM so by default I do the bulk of it. If DH is home he'll sometimes give him a bath/put him to bed, and he takes him to Baby Hour at the library. And he changes a lot of diapers when he's here. He's always been involved, but he's just at work a lot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915406 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:34:24 +0000 Charm54 915406@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We pretty much do...he shovels the snow, mows the lawn, takes out the trash....I vacuum, dust, change the beds, etc. I cook, but he does the dishes. We split the laundry. </p> <p> We used to be more evenly split but now that we have a house cleaner my workload is considerably cutdown so I have taken on more of the traditional roles on my own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915402 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:33:09 +0000 citymouse 915402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A little bit. I cook and do most of the cleaning. But he does the dishes and all the laundry. He mows the grass but I like working in the yard in the spring w him. We dont have kids yet, so well see how that goes! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915399 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:32:06 +0000 mrsjyw 915399@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>mostly traditional. sometimes dh helps with indoor stuff and sometimes i help w outdoor stuff. finances are split 50/50. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915397 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:31:26 +0000 looch 915397@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I think I agree with your assessment of the traditional parenting roles, maybe enhancing it to include that the dads are the coaches for the afterschool sports teams and maybe the designated drivers for morning weekend activities? Maybe the dads help out with the math and science homework, while the moms are more likely to help out with the arts/humanities? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915383 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:27:41 +0000 mrbee 915383@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: For chores, I think the historical stereotype is that guys do the outside work (yard, car, trash) while women do the inside work (cooking, cleaning, dusting).</p> <p>For parenting, the historical stereotype is probably that most guys don't do that much? i.e. no night wakeups, "helping out" when asked but not proactively parenting, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915376 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:26:55 +0000 MrsTiz 915376@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes 100%. I do everything inside and DH does everything outside. It actually really makes me mad because if he wants me to act like a 1950's housewife, he needs to make more money so I can stay home like one, HA! </p> <p>@looch: you would do everything :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-and-your-so-conform-to-gender-stereotypes-when-divvying-up-the-householdparenting-work#post-915375 Tue, 09 Jul 2013 11:26:43 +0000 MapleMoose 915375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's a mix, some chores we both do and some we have assigned roles. DH and I share many chores like sweeping, vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom. I tend to do the laundry and DH mows the lawn. We often alternate the cooking, but whoever didn't cook has to wash the dishes. </p>