https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 06:17:29 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts/page/2#post-2603920 Mon, 15 Aug 2016 08:06:15 +0000 LuLu Mom 2603920@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My in laws bought LO her first bike, they asked us and I said "SURE!" it was a great gift. My parents bought them a nice swing set, they love it. I'm not sentimental about that stuff I guess? I do want to take them to their first concert though, so I guess if someone bought concert tickets I would be sad? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2603913 Mon, 15 Aug 2016 08:03:01 +0000 sandy 2603913@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I love and appreciate whatever gifts people want to give to LO. Just bc someone gifts your LO something doesn't preclude you from buying your LO what you really wanted to buy him/her anyway. Like if my parents bought LO a bike that's fine with me and it might be the bike we keep at their house. </p> <p>Also, I don't think gifts should be given with expectations or conditions. Like if someone gifted me some art for my house I would thank them for being thoughtful and appreciate the gesture but I'm not obligated to display it front and center in my home if I don't love it or it's not my style. Same with gifts to LO. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2603775 Sun, 14 Aug 2016 16:01:24 +0000 Cole 2603775@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@irene: we (OK, mostly I) fall into the pain in the ass category too. I exchanged about half of my daughter's birthday gifts last year. My mom and one sister have mostly embraced my mentally and just buy super cute upscale clothes and stuffed animals (we are overrun by stuffed animals but at least they are nice ones.) My mil buys the weirdest stuff though... Not even stuff you can return either like a ceramic piggy bank made by some artist and it looks like they were inspired by Picasso... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2603758 Sun, 14 Aug 2016 14:44:59 +0000 Boogs 2603758@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wouldn't mind, but something like a bike we would prefer to know what it was before to make sure it would work for LO. And would like to be present to watch when they open the gift. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2603114 Fri, 12 Aug 2016 09:01:54 +0000 SugarplumsMom 2603114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Generally, no. My mom bought DD her first trike (although, I did get to pick it out). However, I do care if it's a large piece of furniture or something that I have to use for prolonged periods of time (i.e. stroller, carseat, bed, etc.). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2603099 Fri, 12 Aug 2016 08:31:12 +0000 irene 2603099@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's a difficult question to answer.... I think I would be OK with it but I imagine DH wouldn't be because he's a control freak. He researched DS's first balance bike for months before he ended up buying one, and we still haven't bought a paddle bike for him because apparently he couldn't find one that is just right. I really wonder how he would feel if someone just buy DS a paddle bike randomly without research.</p> <p>Actually come to think about it, in general I don't like people giving DS gifts.... even if it is his birthday. I just don't like random toys. If we are to throw a birthday party I think I am going to ask people to NOT bring any gifts. A friend bought us a BPA water bottle with DS's name on it randomly at a gift shop, we also never used it because DH has a thing with food utensils being "made in China". In-laws also buy us a ton of DS's clothes whenever they saw us.... while I am ok with it I am not excited about it. We do let DS wear some of them when I can, but mostly they would be too big, or I don't like the style they selected, I'd hang them in the closet and totally forgot about them while they fill up my closet space .... :(</p> <p>So yes, we are pain in the asses and control freaks. I am not proud of it but I can't help it... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2603051 Fri, 12 Aug 2016 07:09:34 +0000 caterw 2603051@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like to be a part of DD's special experiences and gifts. I definitely don't mind if someone wants to actually buy a gift for her but I would like to have input on the features and items- we have limited space and I prefer for DD not to have a lot of plastic, motorized, or electronic toys anyway. I don't like when my ILs get her Christmas dresses and PJs, but that is mostly because they buy character clothing and I really dislike it- it's not out of principle.</p> <p>There are some things that I would be super mad about if someone else took her to do though! We are going to American Girl this year / getting her her first AG doll and we took her to her first play and movie. DH doesn't like when he misses her experiences either so we do important events as a family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602987 Fri, 12 Aug 2016 00:15:13 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 2602987@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm all for it! Buy my kids whatever! Less for me to buy :-P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602821 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 18:54:05 +0000 JenGirl 2602821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it's something that I want my kid to have (or don't mind him having) then I don't care who buys it. I'd only be annoyed if people bought him something I didn't want him to have or we didn't have space for or something like that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602793 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 18:18:07 +0000 mrbee 2602793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not at all!! If it's something fun, I love to be there when the gift is revealed though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602787 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 18:03:34 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2602787@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would only care if the gift wasn't what I chose and they insisted on getting their version. Seriously, if a grandparent is thinking about a train set table for LO more than likely I already have one in mind. I don't think my family or in-laws will attempt to gift him special gifts or "first" gifts since they realize just how particular we are about things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602780 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 17:39:35 +0000 chopstixwife 2602780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>nope. MIL usually buys a bunch of stuff and she's given the kids their bikes, scooter, etc. Lately, she's been asking what to give the kids and I just send her a list of items and if she purchase them or not, it's all good. Sometimes, she'll ask, ie. if she can get the big kid (6) a scooter for his birthday and i said it's fine. No big deal. Just saves me a whole lotta $$. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602762 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 17:03:43 +0000 youboots 2602762@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends. But mostly no. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602741 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 16:34:03 +0000 Cole 2602741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have some things I'm really excited to give her so I'd be upset if someone else did. There are other things I wouldn't mind at all though assuming they were reasonably respectful of our wishes, a bike would be fine but if it were covered in characters I'd be peeved. My mom has bought special occasion dresses twice now and I'm thrilled because she picked dressier stuff than I woul (which is a positive for me), plus she's very sweetly said as long as I stage a photo for her she doesn't care if it gets worn. If anyone buys her an American girl doll before me though I'll be pissed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602649 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 14:10:03 +0000 Andrea 2602649@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would love it. Our kids get so few gifts from our families. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602609 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:38:02 +0000 yoursilverlining 2602609@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: hmmm, maybe I'll use that line this Christmas! The jammies are not so bad in the scheme of things because LO will rock Santa all year round, but the wedding dress is bothering me. I feel jerky about that, but also happy to hear I'm not the only one who would feel that way! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602605 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:34:37 +0000 Mrs. Cheesecake 2602605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom bought DS a Thomas train set for Christmas once. It irked me initially because it took up a lot of space, but she rarely buys him large presents so I sucked it up and was fine with it. Plus he really loved playing with it. She also bought DD a baby doll, but I asked her to exchange it for a different skin tone. Other than that I don't mind if the grandparents buy things for the LOs. Usually they just give them money for birthdays and holidays - which is fine too! :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602602 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:31:20 +0000 alphagam84 2602602@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I want to be able to buy her certain big gifts-like her first balance bike-but I won't mind much as long as we are consulted first as I have very specific preferences about what items I want for her. I have different taste in clothes from my family (they wish I dressed DD in frilly clothes) so I don't put her in many of the clothes they buy and prefer to buy my own. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602587 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:19:42 +0000 catgirl 2602587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not the buying or giving that bothers me - it's buying without consulting with us. For bigger gifts we have to be mindful of how much space we have. For all gifts I tend to do a lot of research and form strong opinions. It's difficult when someone gets her something that is similar but doesn't have the same features I was looking for. </p> <p>We keep a running, up to date Amazon list for DD - it helps a bit, but some people of course ignore it or take offense to it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602578 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:07:08 +0000 Anagram 2602578@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't care if people buy "special" gifts, but I wish they'd take my preferences into consideration first--or just ask me if I've already bought it. </p> <p>I honestly don't have this problem, because our parents don't typically buy big/special gifts for the kids. But I wouldn't be *thrilled* if we got, like...a giant, hot pink plastic kitchen if I'd been planning on something a little more neutral. </p> <p>My husband 100% doesn't care and would always prefer free-to-us over something with a look I prefer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602573 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:04:24 +0000 Foodnerd81 2602573@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: the special occasion dress thing would piss me off too. Same for the expectation of Christmas morning pjs. My girl is opinionated enough now that I would just say "she" picked out what I wanted her to wear and that I let her choose since she was so adamant :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602571 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:01:45 +0000 yoursilverlining 2602571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes and no. Mostly no; but for example my MIL (and some of LO’s great-aunts) will buy her Christmas PJs specifically for Christmas morning (with expectation that LO WILL wear the jammies ON CHRISTMAS morning and pictures in the jammies will be shared) and that annoys me because then I don’t get to pick them out and also because I have to arrange for LO to quick-change into multiple jammie outfits Christmas morning which is a PITA :silly: </p> <p>Also (moreso) MIL always buys LO special occasion dresses for specific occassions, which also bugs me. I don’t get annoyed at family buying LO fancy dresses for her to wear whenever, but for example we have a wedding coming up and I was planning on taking LO shopping to get a dress that would complement my dress and not clash and MIL has of course already bought LO a dress for the wedding, without asking me. I get that she is trying to be helpful, but there is zero consideration of whether *I* might like to do that for/with LO. This also makes me feel like a dick, because I know I should just be grateful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602569 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 13:00:38 +0000 avivoca 2602569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Foodnerd81: Seriously! They live on land. I live on .22 acre with an 1100 sq. ft. house. I don't have any room to store that. We told them that they could get her one, but it would live at their house (and they only see her once a year because they live so far away). </p> <p>My FIL also wanted to get her a rifle, but um, no. No guns for my kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602567 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:55:36 +0000 runnerd 2602567@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I did at first (in the early days I got upset because my in-laws got a jumperoo for us - wtf was wrong with me?) then I got over that really fast cause things are expensive, so I welcome grandparent generousity!! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602566 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:54:16 +0000 Foodnerd81 2602566@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@JerricaBenton: my FIL and his wife have done that twice, sent Christmas pjs that arrived after Christmas, once in completely the wrong size anyway. I don't care for pjs since they get worn year round anyway but I agree with a special dress that would be annoying. </p> <p>To that point, yeah I want to pick out their special occasion outfits- Christmas, Easter maybe, first day of school... Sometimes I feel bad buying something kind of impractical since they already have plenty of impractical dresses that hardly get worn, but whatever. They are my little girls and I'll buy them a $15 dress for a special occasion while they still let me. :grin: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602565 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:52:41 +0000 Mommy Finger 2602565@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Things are things. I don't care. I would care a little more about milestone experiences. For example, DH will have a few days off between jobs soon and has talked about taking DS1 to the Field museum in Chicago to see the dinosaurs. I am bummed I wouldn't be there to experience it with him but I wouldn't ever stop them. I love that they'll have that special bond. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602561 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:51:15 +0000 Foodnerd81 2602561@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our families are generally very good about asking what she wants/ needs and following our suggestions. My inlaws have given her a balance bike and a micro mini scooter at our specific suggestions. So yes I want to be consulted because I have opinions on things, I don't mind who actually gives it to her. </p> <p>@avivoca: my friend had the same issue with the four wheeler thing. They live in a condo in the city and didn't want their 3 year old to have a power wheels thing and her MiL got all upset about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602557 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:47:10 +0000 JerricaBenton 2602557@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It depends. The only people who would get lo big/special gifts would be my parents. My mom pretty much always asks if she has xyz and then I have the opportunity to say yes/no/don't get that. I would be pissed if we got her something special for Christmas or birthday and then they got her the same thing without talking to me but I don't really see that happening. ILs do weird stuff like sending a 'special' outfit meant to be worn at a holiday or something (like a Christmas dress), like 4 days before the holiday and I'm like uhhh ok I already have something for her to wear. So that's something that kind of annoys me but it's more funny because it doesn't really affect lo. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602543 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:38:34 +0000 mauxie 2602543@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, but I can tell sometimes my in-laws try to out gift my parents LOL. My parents don't care and neither do I. Honestly it seems my kids end up liking/remembering random, little gifts the most. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-care-if-others-gift-your-lo-special-gifts#post-2602534 Thu, 11 Aug 2016 12:29:23 +0000 brownepiano 2602534@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No. Sometimes I wish they would buy him less clothes so that I could pick out what he wears. But I'm usually just grateful for the help because our budget is really tight. </p>