https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 29 Apr 2026 19:43:07 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801791 Wed, 22 May 2013 17:39:36 +0000 photojane 801791@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh yes... I'm like lady santa clause. I love kids! :) Dan loves kids too, but really only loves on the kids in our family. I think that's more because he's reserved &amp; less because he's a man. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801724 Wed, 22 May 2013 17:05:43 +0000 Honeybee 801724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: It's not fair at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801669 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:47:29 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 801669@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hug, hold, love on, snuggle many different kids. They seem to gravitate towards me... maybe because I'm a pediatrician and interact with kids all day long every day?</p> <p>We would not bat an eyelash if @honeybee: 's husband picked up and loved on our kids. Also, many in our circle of friends are gay men and we have no problem with our friends interacting with, snuggling our girls... but they are as close to our girls as family and we would trust them with their lives.</p> <p>But I get it. In today's society, there is a double standard between men and women and affection towards children... and it's not necessarily fair. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801656 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:41:13 +0000 erinpye 801656@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Absolutely! All the time. I think, unfairly, it seems like in our culture we have different, unspoken, rules for dads than moms though. My mom's group hugs, sometimes kisses on the cheek, and snuggles each other's babies, and some of our kids hug and kiss each other on the cheek. I think it's good to show affection and love in a healthy way--our culture is way too standoffish sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801648 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:37:50 +0000 SugarplumsMom 801648@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Only if they're my godkids or close friends. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801604 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:20:02 +0000 Mrsbells 801604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: yes if I am good friends with the parent then I wouldnt hesitate, but at daycare I would feel the same as you </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801594 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:18:05 +0000 JerricaBenton 801594@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't really been in the position yet but like pps, I would hug close friends' kids or if a child asked or initiated it. I feel bad for kid whose parents force them to hug when they don't want to. </p> <p>It's definitely different for men though. Once I overheard my husband outside and he goes 'sorry, I don't like hugging. ' so of course I asked him what was going on and he said our neighbor's son had been asking for a hug the last few days and he didn't know what else to say but he knew he wasn't going to hug him, haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801580 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:13:06 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 801580@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>If it is a friend's kid: yes!!<br /> My husband wouldn't because he is a man (@mrbee: ). He likes kids and loves our son obviously but no, he will do anything to avoid awkwardness, inappropriateness, or suspicion. I don't blame him!</p> <p>My husband already said our kids won't have sleepovers. We don't want our son at his friends house if the kid has sisters and we don't want our daughter anywhere. We also don't want girls to sleep over because you never know what they could take home/say. Once the suspicion is out there: the damage is done, even if everything was 100% innocent . I won't let my husband fall into that situation :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801569 Wed, 22 May 2013 16:07:13 +0000 mrs. 64 801569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would hug a friend's kid... once someone has one! Also I'm an elementary school teacher so I give lots of kid hugs everyday. I do stick to the side hug though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801532 Wed, 22 May 2013 15:53:39 +0000 BoogieBea 801532@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For a while, I rarely even hugged my nieces and nephew. They are from my husbands side but I've known them since they were babies. I think it was after we got married, that I started hugging them and now I'll give them kisses as well. My parents weren't physically affectionate with us growing up so adult/child affection was new territory to me.<br /> I've never hugged LOs friends yet though. His classmate and smacked my behind once though. That was weird! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801505 Wed, 22 May 2013 15:44:19 +0000 winniebee 801505@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hug my friends' kids, but not acquaintances kids...usually the parents are present and it is in the form of a hello or goodbye. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801496 Wed, 22 May 2013 15:42:16 +0000 banana 801496@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hug my friends' kids all the time. I even kiss their heads (if I know them really well). But i don't think I'd hug a stranger's kid unless he/she initiated it first. I don't encourage my son to hug people unless we're really close to them. He'll give them high fives instead! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801485 Wed, 22 May 2013 15:39:13 +0000 shopaholic 801485@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: totally different rules for men. :(</p> <p>We hug all of our personal friends kids? But in your situation I think it is necessary by sad to be overly cautious. Even my friends that are teachers , many dont hug the little kids for precaution.</p> <p>After that Amanda berry thing where one of the victims was his daughter's BFF... It's so scary for parents any which way you look at it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-801248 Wed, 22 May 2013 14:31:32 +0000 Honeybee 801248@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I totally think it's different with men and women. My husband is super cautious around other kids (even our good friends' kids) and I don't think he would ever hug/kiss/pick them up. On the other hand, I have no issues hugging other kids or picking them up. I used hug/hold the babies at DD's daycare all the time without a thought. I think men just have to be a lot more cautious, unfortunately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800969 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:16:29 +0000 brownie 800969@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes I will hug (only) if the child initiates it. Those rules go out the window with very very close friends kids. But I am a women. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800926 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:04:18 +0000 jhd 800926@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm a high school teacher. Sometimes kids want a hug and that is awkward! </p> <p>I hug my Sunday school kids who are elementary school age sometimes. But I know their parents etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800914 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:02:18 +0000 Boheme 800914@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, when we hang out with friends and hug them goodbye their kids always hug me goodbye too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800906 Wed, 22 May 2013 13:01:01 +0000 Lozza 800906@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also think that kissing is different. I'll kiss LO, but LO doesn't really kiss anyone, and I don't kiss other people's kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800896 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:59:25 +0000 Lozza 800896@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't tend to initiate hugs with kids unless I know them REALLY well (we have a "village" of friends where everyone kind of co-parents all the kids, and everybody hugs everybody else's kids and it's not weird at all and they're all used to all of us), but I'll happily hug any kid who wants one. There are a few kids at daycare that like giving hugs to other moms, and I don't think twice about it. I do think part of that is age- LO is still with the younger kids, so I only really see the kids ages 2.5 and under. I'd find it odder if some 5 year old I didn't know well wanted a hug. I also feel like I know most of these kids' parents well enough that they wouldn't object, plus I have the extra freedom of being a woman (I totally agree that men get a lot more scrutiny on stuff like this). LO hugs random people all the time- he went through a period where he wanted to hug all the other moms dropping off or picking up their kids at daycare, and occasionally he'll try to hug totally random people, like an older gentleman who let LO pet his dog at the farmer's market last week (the guy had young grandkids so I think he and his wife thought it was cute rather than weird). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800890 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:57:57 +0000 Mrs. Train 800890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I hug my friends kids. I also pick up their kids if they are crying and they are not around. I think there are lots of different situations though. I used to work at a zoo and a couple of times I Found lost kids and they just wanted a hug. I didn't even hesitate. When I was a high school teacher I alway had kids coming up and hugging me and I would definitely tense up and not hug in return. But teachers have been getting such bad rap lately I just couldn't risk it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800861 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:45:48 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 800861@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Your stories about kids and not crossing the lines are so interesting like the kid who wanted to play with you at the indoor playground. Unless I know men personally, I admit I give people the side eye when they are doing something with children especially if the child does not appear to be their own. </p> <p>I hug friend's kids if the child wants to be hugged. I don't ask for his and don't play along with patents trying to coax a child to hug me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800832 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:37:04 +0000 TemperanceBrennan 800832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Kids seem to really gravitate towards me - which I think it interesting because I was never around kids growing up and never babysat - and I hug and hold friend's kids all the time. I've never really been alone with kids whose parents I don't know well. As long as the parents are there, I feel comfortable hugging children. (Never been in a daycare situation). </p> <p>I was in a awkward situation when an acquaintance brought her child to a get-together and when they left, she made her daughter hug every single person there - many people the she didn't even meet/talk to. I didn't like that. </p> <p>I can see how I might be more careful if I was a man. When I coached swim team, I didn't give any thought to being alone with a kid, but a coworker who coaches a girls sport team makes sure he is never, ever alone with any of the girls. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800798 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:29:22 +0000 MamaMoose 800798@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hold other people's babies at daycare all the time. Sometimes when I go to pick up at the end of the day my baby will be perfectly happy and someone else is being fussy while the teacher has her hands full. I don't think twice about picking up a crying baby to comfort them. And it would never bother me to come in and see another parent holding my baby. But I can see why you might be more hesitant as a man (I think is stupid that you have to feel that way, but I get why you do). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800796 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:28:49 +0000 MrsKoala 800796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would hug them if they asked for a hug. But my friend's kids are not comfortable around people who aren't family so they would never ask me. Makes me really sad. :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800788 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:26:47 +0000 Andrea 800788@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My friends' kids, yes. Kids at daycare, no. They ask me for hugs and I just give them a little pat. I do not think it is appropriate to hug without the child's parent present even though these kids know and see me every day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800785 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:25:11 +0000 Reese 800785@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am a hugger. cheek squeezer. and a holder (children I know or I am around their parents and get the nod of approval)</p> <p>DH is a hugger too - but we are normally only around friend's children. Once we were on the beach (in the caribbean) and I wanted him to take a picture of this crazy clown thing that was running around. He didn't and I got upset. He said it was because children were surrounding the clown and he didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable that he was man taking a photo of children whom he didn't know. When really I just wanted a picture of the clown man on stilts. I totally understand his reasoning and admire him for being so thoughtful. @mrbee: I sadly agree that the rules are different for men. Nobody would have blinked twice if I took a bunch of photos. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800773 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:22:30 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 800773@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a few friends with little kids (under 3) that have randomly ran over and hugged my legs, and sometimes they smooch me goodbye, but it's super cute and their parents are right there.</p> <p>Another friend has a 7 year old boy and he always gives me a hug goodbye, but his mom is always there.</p> <p>I don't think its a big deal, but I can see how it would be different for men, which is a shame. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800767 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:21:48 +0000 HLK208 800767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't feel comfortable hugging other children that I barely know. Only my friends kids. Unless a child was hurt at preschool pick-up and their parent wasn't around I might pick them up to console them (it's happened before) but that's about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800751 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:18:54 +0000 chopsuey 800751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hurmm.. I don't think any of my friends' kids have asked for hugs, but our friends hug, kiss and hold our kids all the time.<br /> They're single and DD calls them aunt and uncle (in Korean). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-ever-hug-your-friends-kids#post-800736 Wed, 22 May 2013 12:16:21 +0000 mrs. tictactoe 800736@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can see how it would be different for men, but I think if there are other people around and the kid asks, it's fine, regardless of gender.</p> <p>As a teacher, though, it is a trickier situation. </p>