https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 07 Jun 2026 03:27:41 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-446206 Wed, 12 Dec 2012 21:39:05 +0000 BabyLove 446206@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sorry folks! I fell off the map as LO has a stomach bug. I've been thrown up on 3 x's today- sweet! </p> <p>Anyhoo, I think when you frame it in the way some of you have it does lessen the guilt. To be able to provide a sibling is a good thing. Developmentally, emotionally, etc. Makes sense! </p> <p>When the time is right, it's right. And I'll know it. I wonder of the guilt is just an internal signal that I'm just not ready yet. For now I'm just gonna soak up all as much of my baby angel as I can :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-444095 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 22:46:56 +0000 Mrs. Confetti 444095@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's weird, but I don't feel that kind of guilt. I think it's wonderful for kids to have siblings, and down the line, I want to add to our family. If anything, I feel more fear - adding another baby just seems scary to me, because I can't imagine doing the newborn stage again while watching a toddler too... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-444067 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 22:09:04 +0000 shopaholic 444067@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I already feel guilty for Baby #2, even though Baby #1 is still cooking in my belly! I was telling DH the other day how we'll probably never be as excited as this time around for a #2. Especially because it's the 1st for us, I'm not working or preoccupied by anything else, and it's a first grandchild for my parents, and first grand-daughter for my in-laws. I was feeling sad already at the thought that #2 won't get as much excitement. But DH also pointed out that #2 would be the last grandchild for his parents and forever be "the baby" - which is true. lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443956 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 21:15:38 +0000 heffalump 443956@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't feel guilty at all. I'm the baby in my family, my mom has three kids, and I never once felt like she didn't have enough love to split between all of us. </p> <p>I do cherish the moments that we have with just lo, when its dh, lo, and I giggling like crazy together. But when we have another baby there will be other special moments, sibling moments. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443938 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 21:07:25 +0000 sarac 443938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Honestly, no. I see the difference between my toddler (I stay at home) and my niece (full time daycare). My daughter seems to think that the world basically revolves around her. I do my best to quash that notion in her, but with limited success. A second child will be a bummer for her, but I think it'll be really good for her in the long term. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443832 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 20:07:18 +0000 autumnlove 443832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel guilty because my LO will only be 16 months when her sister arrives! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443790 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 19:41:09 +0000 prettylizy 443790@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BabyLove: so much of this is self inflicted guilt. Did you have a sibling growing up? I have an older sister and we are so close I hope and wish that my little girl can have a lifelong friend like I do in my sister. If I flip the guilt to selfishness in my head (it's selfish of me not to want to share her with a sibling, selfish of me to put all my parental aspirations on one kid, selfish of me to leave taking care of DH and I in our elderly years to one child) then it just makes sense to give her a brother or sister. It's all about changing your paradigm, which is easier said than done! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443734 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:31:26 +0000 BabyLove 443734@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@prettylizy- glad I'm not the only one! You're frame of reference is right on though. Seeing LO with her cousins IS great, she does love to play with kids. The same as your LO. So a sibling is a must. Eventually! </p> <p>@honeybee- WHAT?!?! You mean the guilt might not just go away one day? Haha. </p> <p>It's funny because I have been known to feel guilty about things that I'd never see as being an issue if it were other people involved. Like, whenever I go out I feel guilty. It's such a rarity. And if a friend told me they went out 2 times a month I'd never think she's doing something awful. Oy. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443732 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:29:24 +0000 Andrea 443732@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, I haven't felt guilty yet. DD is 2.5 y.o. so I feel like she's received a lot of individual attention pre-sibling. I'm sure I will feel guilty when the baby is actually here, though, and I can't spend as much time with her anymore. :-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443729 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:26:23 +0000 Honeybee 443729@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My second is 8.5 months old, and I still feel guilty sometimes. Mommy guilt isn't alway rational... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443724 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:22:41 +0000 prettylizy 443724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel this way sometimes too!! How can I give up my attention and love and everything that I have focused on this little piece of perfection to another sibling. Then I see how happy she is when she plays with her cousins and I think that having a sibling just means one more person on this earth to love her and for her to love. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443710 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:13:58 +0000 BabyLove 443710@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hahaha, yea I'm not sure that it's the best plan. I have baby and puppy fever right now. I gotta pick my poison! Or, per my husband I have to just chill-the-hell-out. Lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443706 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:12:47 +0000 Foodnerd81 443706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can't imagine a new puppy and a 16 month old baby! But, I guess a new baby would be even more work, or so they tell me... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-feel-guilty#post-443694 Tue, 11 Dec 2012 18:08:01 +0000 BabyLove 443694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm sure this has been discussed. I just haven't seen it. But in thinking about having another baby, I feel guilty! I adore my daughter and feel awful thinking about taking her undivided attention away. And honestly, I cannot imagine loving anyone as much as I love her. So that makes me feel guilty for our unborn child! Guilt everywhere!! </p> <p>How do you get past that? </p> <p>I have baby fever badly. But I think ultimately this means we're not going to have another one, not yet. Which is fine. Maybe when she's 3? She's only 16 months now. We have time. I should just get a puppy! Sweet comprise right there.......... Right? </p>