https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 19 May 2026 03:11:04 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-361260 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 17:50:42 +0000 mrsjyw 361260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have gifted and will gift my brother/parents, younger cousins who are like siblings to me if/when they need it.</p> <p>We do have a loan out to FIL because it's a large sum. He has the $, just needed liquidity, he's already paid us back half and the other half we'll have before the year end. I would do it again in a heartbeat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360885 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 15:38:18 +0000 SugarplumsMom 360885@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@autumnlove: waaaah!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360872 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 15:31:58 +0000 PurplePumps 360872@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've never been asked, but if I were, it'd depend on what they needed it for and the situation they were in. No money for food cause you wanted new TV and the latest gadgets? Sorry, you're on your own and need to learn a less. Lost a job and having a hard time? Sure, no problem. My husband gave his mom 5k to help pay for hospital bills once, if we can afford to help with something like that, then I dont have a problem with it at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360838 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 15:18:07 +0000 Adira 360838@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've been lucky that I've never been asked to borrow money, but if I was asked by my family, I would probably let them borrow it (depending on the reason). BUT if they didn't pay me back, I wouldn't let them borrow again.</p> <p>Hubs has lent money to both his mom and sister in the past. He never got paid back, so he says if they ever ask again, he won't let them borrow money. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360741 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:47:42 +0000 Mrsbells 360741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've never been asked by my in-laws for money. but I wouldnt want to encourace my BIL to just drop by and ask for $40 every now and then. I would loan money if it was an emergency </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360721 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:40:55 +0000 MamaMoose 360721@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@autumnlove: Good plan : ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360719 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:40:21 +0000 autumnlove 360719@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaMoose: I didn't tell him yet. He had a bad day at work and his family stresses him out so I'll tell him tonight! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360704 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:36:33 +0000 MamaMoose 360704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@autumnlove: What did your husband say when you told him about it? I assume it's his brother? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360693 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:34:31 +0000 MamaMoose 360693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I could never see anyone in my family asking to loan a small amount. Larger amounts I could see. In fact my father loaned my brother a good chunk so he could get to a 20% down payment on his house and not have to pay PMI. They had a payment plan in place with a small interest rate and it has never been an issue. My parents would have done the same for me with no problem but we live in a place with a much lower cost of living then my bro. </p> <p>The only people in our extended family who I can think of needing to borrow small amounts are not responsible with money and would never pay it back. So I can't see us ever doing that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360668 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:28:28 +0000 autumnlove 360668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Crumbs: Lol! Um...38! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360634 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:22:02 +0000 SugarplumsMom 360634@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@autumnlove: he really put you on the spot, so not cool! How old is this kid? Asking for $20 for gas is one thing but outright $100 - I think he's totally taking advantage of our kindness! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360613 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:17:27 +0000 mamimami 360613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Only with my in-laws... we have loaned AND borrowed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360611 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:16:19 +0000 DillonLion 360611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No. I either decline or give the money without expecting it to be paid back. I don't want to deal with the awkwardness of you not paying me back when you say you will, or whatever. I'd rather just give it and never discuss it again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360607 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:15:52 +0000 heffalump 360607@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've never been asked. Whenever family needs money we all go to our parents. I would if I had it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-360598 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 14:14:09 +0000 kml636 360598@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That is really awkward. I would probably have responded the same as you. </p> <p>My SIL asked DH for $1000 and we went back and forth as to whether we should do it... she's a single mom with a history of being really irresponsible. In the end we did it, she has paid us back some of it but there is always a story like "can you hold the check to cash until this date", etc etc. Such a troubling position to be in... And I'm worried now we've set a precedent that she'll try this again! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359918 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 10:31:01 +0000 Cole 359918@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I haven't been in this position thankfully other than buying a group gift type of thing or we are out and someone doesn't have cash. We did cosign a student loan for my brother but it is small enough of an amount that we won't be up a creek if something happens and he struggles to make the payments. I am not sure I would do that for every one though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359876 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 10:14:05 +0000 wheres_c 359876@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My family has never asked. So's siblings/MIL often ask to borrow money. Before when it was his money, it was up to him what he did with it. </p> <p>Now that we have joint finances, the rules are that SO and I agree on a payment plan ahead of time. His family must agree to it. If they fail to pay it back according to the plan, they lose all borrowing privileges.</p> <p>So far it's been working. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359759 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:38:06 +0000 prettylizy 359759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@autumnlove: is this your DH's bro? I would totally have DH handle that 'boundary' conversation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359754 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:36:55 +0000 Mrs. Bee 359754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>if it's immediate family, we typically don't expect it back (because we gift it to them, not because they don't pay it back). my family thinks of money as more communal, so we all give and we take.</p> <p>extended family however..... i'd only lend it to the relatives i like! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359746 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:34:34 +0000 autumnlove 359746@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@prettylizy: Yeah, it was definitely awkward. He thanked me for the $40 and told me I can call him anytime I need help...picking up LO or with groceries. He prob expects more $! :-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359711 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:22:44 +0000 Meridian 359711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We haven't been asked to borrow money, but we've been expected to give money (to the ILs). I dunno what's worse, haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359707 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:21:57 +0000 MrsTiz 359707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've let DH's mom borrow money before and haven't seen it. My sister would be the only person realistically I would loan money. My parents wouldn't need it or would be too proud. My sister would actually pay it back. Never DH's mom or extended fam. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359704 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:20:44 +0000 blackbird 359704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'd ask why they needed the money, but no, I don't lend out money. Save maybe $20 or something small. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359700 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:19:06 +0000 LC 359700@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH and I have "lent" pretty substantial money to his father and brother in the past. Each time we discussed a repayment plan with them... and they never repaid us. So, lesson learned, we will never give or loan money to them again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359693 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:18:06 +0000 chopsuey 359693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My cousin asked to borrow money and I told him no. There was no way he could pay us back since he wasn't working. Instead, I just sent him a couple hundred bucks as a "gift." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359673 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:13:00 +0000 Springtime 359673@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have let my sister borrow money recently when she asked but I would probably never do it again bc she couldn't pay me bck and then had to ask my mom to pay me for her. And she used the money for something stupid. If it were another family member that I was close to, and if they really needed it then I would, only if I thought they would do the same for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359671 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:11:15 +0000 stiffaknee 359671@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I've loaned my parents money (a total of $800). I don't expect to get paid back and I only did it because I could stand to lose the money....my philosophy on loans is, only do it if you can look at it as a gift (and never expect to get repaid). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359661 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:08:11 +0000 MrsBrewer 359661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I''ve never been in the position, but I think if we were able to I would lend out the money for sure! I'm confident that our families would pay us back too </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359639 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 09:00:04 +0000 mediagirl 359639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. Well, we've never been asked and we don't have family nearby. If we were asked, I would guess it would be for a large amount. I wouldn't do it. It would put too much of a strain on family members. I would GIVE $20 or $40 but never in terms of a loan b/c I would never expect it back and wouldn't want bitter feelings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-let-family-borrow-money#post-359635 Thu, 25 Oct 2012 08:59:11 +0000 prettylizy 359635@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That is super awkward.....</p> <p>I've lent family money before, mostly my sister when she was in University and not being super awesome with her money. She always paid me back. For the most part now, we don't lend money, but we will do things like I'll buy the concert tickes and they have to pay me back. </p>