Hellobee Boards Topic: Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?

Hellobee Boards Topic: Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 18 May 2026 06:04:53 +0000 JennyD on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382988 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 22:28:49 +0000 JennyD 1382988@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We have always traded everything in an effort to avoid this situation, but we only have 1. Daddy does have some difficulty getting her to do some things, but she will do almost everything for either of us, no problem. I feel fortunate! mrs. wagon on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382437 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 17:33:36 +0000 mrs. wagon 1382437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We do, very purposefully. We actually switch routines so that the less favored parent does bedtime. I never wanted there to be a situation where one kid HAS to have one parent. Thankfully our kids have been pretty flexible about it. WJ kinda goes back and forth, but has never really had a strong preference either way. LMW really prefers me, but WS has been doing her bedtime for so long now that she gets thrown off if I put her down! Boogs on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382342 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:59:15 +0000 Boogs 1382342@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My LO is so mean to my DH because he has such a big mommy preference. I've been trying really hard to work on it because I just don't have the energy to deal since I'm so sick. So, I've been trying to make DH do as much as he can. I'm hoping he adjusts sooner than later, otherwise I'm afraid of the problems we will have with a new baby. It all honestly does make me a bit sad, though, because I love that we are so close. Andrea on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382339 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:56:22 +0000 Andrea 1382339@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Same as @autumnlove. She wakes up in the middle of the night looking for Daddy, but there isn't anything we can do about the fact that she doesn't see him before bedtime. I think it is what it is. autumnlove on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382287 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:34:47 +0000 autumnlove 1382287@https://boards.hellobee.com/ No, there isn't much we can do about it. She always asks for Daddy when he is at work. Sparkler on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382265 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:24:34 +0000 Sparkler 1382265@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Also wanted to add, that if my husband or I are not at home then our kids don't seem to care at all! Our issue is when the "preferred bedtime parent" is home and not putting them to bed! Sparkler on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382255 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:20:57 +0000 Sparkler 1382255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I could have written this! Although it makes us both sad, I am coming to the realization that it doesn't really matter since we are both at home for 99% of bedtimes anyway. Although we are still struggling through this, I think I am going to respect the preferences that have developed through our parenting habits so that they aren't stressed/crying at bedtime (which makes us stressed too!). We are trying to do one on one things with the non preferred parent during the day to help with bonding and are also considering having the kids share a room in the future so that bedtime can be more of a family experience than one on one bonding. regberadaisy on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382224 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:08:46 +0000 regberadaisy 1382224@https://boards.hellobee.com/ LO had a HUGE mommy preference. Like she would cry and tantrum for anything if it wasn't me. Buy in the last month or so it has gotten a lot better. There has been times she doesn't want to come to me! It's been nice to see the "daddy's girl" show through. I'm not exactly sure what if anything we did induced that change. It will be interesting to see how things might change when #2 arrives! sandy on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382219 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:06:38 +0000 sandy 1382219@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My LO is a serious mama's girl and we try to combat it. The iPad only works when Dada is home ;) and he does bedtime stories and puts her to bed. I just know when I'm pregnant and have a newborn eventually that I won't have the time to do those things so I want her to get used to bedtime with Dada. I think we'll eventually have him take over bath time too bc that will probably be tough being hugely pregnant. Mamaof2 on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382203 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 16:00:55 +0000 Mamaof2 1382203@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Both kids gravitate toward me but my DD is slightly less attached to me than DS. I do try to push them towards DH though for example: "Oh I don't want to go in the basement to play but I bet daddy will" :wink: looch on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382197 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 15:58:04 +0000 looch 1382197@https://boards.hellobee.com/ No. My son had a serious daddy preference for like a year, but now, he's attached to me, literally. He didn't want dad to come to soccer, he didn't want dad to give him his bath, it is all me all over again. travelgirl1 on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382168 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 15:50:00 +0000 travelgirl1 1382168@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I'm trying really hard with it right now, because she cries and runs away if anyone else tries to pick her up, including her Daddy. If I leave the room she goes nuts. We're trying very hard to make Daddy time super fun every day but I still do bedtime, I don't feel like when she's tired is the time to try talk her round. Mrs. Bee on "Do you try to counter your LO's parental preference?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-try-to-counter-your-los-parental-preference#post-1382150 Tue, 28 Jan 2014 15:44:33 +0000 Mrs. Bee 1382150@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I've been ruminating a post on this recently because Charlie prefers Mr. Bee while Olive prefers me. In day to day life it's not a big deal and both kids are fine with either parent. But it is a challenge at bedtime and in the mornings sometimes. Since Charlie is older and I can reason with him, when he does ask for Mr. Bee at bedtime, he is generally fine. Olive asks for me at bedtime often, but sometimes she cries pretty hard. She also asks for me if Mr. Bee gets her in the mornings. She's much harder to reason with because she doesn't understand. I've done Olive's bedtime since she was born, while Mr. Bee has done Charlie's bedtime since she was born. The reason we switched recently was because I weaned Olive. The problem with switching back and forth between kids is that if I put Olive down once, then she just tantrums harder for me the next day. She also goes down more easily for Mr. Bee. We could switch kids again, but will that just lead to the kids preferring one of us even more? Also it gives us a lot more flexibility when Mr. Bee can put Olive down for naps/bedtime instead of just me. So the question is, how much do you try to counter parental preference?