Hellobee Boards Topic: Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?

Hellobee Boards Topic: Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 08 May 2026 03:04:56 +0000 ALittleP on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-17409 Thu, 17 Nov 2011 15:18:40 +0000 ALittleP 17409@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I don't know how we'll turn out but I grew up adapting to my parents. We traveled a lot when I was little and we went out to dinner frequently and I had to learn how to behave in different situations/environments. I hope that our future children will be the same. I learned so much from my experiences that I hope to pass some of those on to our kids. looch on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-17128 Thu, 17 Nov 2011 02:38:21 +0000 looch 17128@https://boards.hellobee.com/ No idea how it will turn out, but my husband and I are old school, the parents run the show, not the other way around. We love to travel and we've already gone to a kinderhotel that has things for both parents and children can enjoy. I really think it comes down to being realistic in your expectations, as an example, we love long family meals lingering at the table, chatting and grazing for hours. Kids don't have a long attention span, so rather than force them to sit there so long or scold them for getting up 100 times, we'll shorten the meals when they are younger. mrbee on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16821 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 16:17:54 +0000 mrbee 16821@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @daniellemybelle: So smart!! Mrs. D on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16820 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 16:15:27 +0000 Mrs. D 16820@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think we'll do both. I want our kids to at least experience the things we enjoy in life, and I don't want them to think they're privileged and always get what they want. they have to learn to compromise, and how to accept they don;t always get their way. But I still want them to have fun, and not think we;re mean, so it has to be a balancing act. daniellemybelle on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16814 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 16:13:11 +0000 daniellemybelle 16814@https://boards.hellobee.com/ The only things we didn't have a choice in as kids were church and food. But my mom was pretty good about limiting our choices in a way that she was comfortable with them but still allowing us to feel like it was our thing. For example, when I decorated my room as a kid she picked out three wallpapers and said, "These are the wallpapers they have for girls' rooms! Which do you want?" I didn't even know that there were a million other options, most of which my mom would have hated. So I guess my parents always controlled the situation but made us feel as if we ran the show... probably made us a little more self-centered but was easier on them! junebugmama on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16730 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 14:53:12 +0000 junebugmama 16730@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We pick our battles. Sometimes we give him a choice in things and other times we explain that it's someone else's turn to chose. He's adapted pretty well to that. I think it keeps him diverse as well. Andrea on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16688 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 14:03:01 +0000 Andrea 16688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think we do both. The LO has to tag along on errands but we also do many activities that are just for her. I think our parents did more of the kid just tags along thing. My mom is always commenting about the wonderful activities that we do with my LO but at the same time doesn't understand why I took her to a music class at 7 months. But I enjoy all these things, too, so I don't feel like I am doing it just for the LO. Mrs. Sunglasses on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16684 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 13:57:57 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 16684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ For now, we do what we want and we bring him along. I'm sure when he will get older we will do more stuff that he likes. but still as a family. it's not easy either way. You gotta give a little and take a little. heffalump on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16683 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 13:57:53 +0000 heffalump 16683@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My parents always did what we wanted to do :) But since there were 3 kids we still had to compromise. I feel like we'll do a little of each. I've gone camping my whole life. If my kids hate it, I don't think I'm willing to stop. I also don't imagine that they'll hate it though. We'll do a lot of what they want to do too. I already told my hubby that Rose gets to pick the whole family's Halloween costume next year... even if that means we're a family of ballerinas :) mrbee on "Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-you-work-for-your-kids-or-do-they-work-for-you-1#post-16676 Wed, 16 Nov 2011 13:51:36 +0000 mrbee 16676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think this is one of the biggest generational differences in parenting. There are two schools of thought: 1) Kids should adapt to how their parents lives 2) Parents should adapt to their kids' preferences Growing up, I can't really remember my parents adapting to my preferences all that much. We went on fishing and camping vacations, because my dad liked to go fishing and my mom liked to go camping. Etc. These days though, it seems like most parents (including me!) adapt to their kid's interests and preferences. While I feel good about this, I feel like it does change the family dynamic quite a bit. I am not sure how I feel about that part of things. Will our LO miss out on learning how to adapt to other people's interests? I worry about raising selfish kids who learn to assume that their happiness is everyone's priority. I hope that won't happen, but I worry a lot about it! Do you work for your kids, or do they work for you? How about growing up: how did things work with your parents?