https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 30 Apr 2026 21:23:23 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868502 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:55:42 +0000 mrbee 1868502@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: That is some advanced level parenting fu you've got there! Gotta try that one out, thanks!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868498 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:54:58 +0000 mrbee 1868498@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. High Heels: I hear "you're not my best friend" too! Also, "Well I don't love you anymore!"</p> <p>I wish I could teach the kids that it's not cool to threaten to remove friendship or love. I had a good talk with Charlie about it, but he still says that stuff sometimes when he's upset. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868487 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:49:37 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 1868487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>N will say, "you're not going to be my best friend anymore!" when I say no. :silly: And then later when she forgives me, I say, "does this mean we're best friends again?"... and she always says yes. Hehe kids are so cute and silly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868474 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 13:44:25 +0000 Jess1483 1868474@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: My little guy isn't quite to that point, yet (although he gets mad sometimes when I tell him no), but when I worked as a behavior specialist and kids pushed back on a no or called me names/said I was mean, I usually said something like "I'm sorry you feel that way, because I really like you." It's a long-term strategy, but I knew it paid off when one of my ODD kiddos in a heightened state said "I know you really care about me but I'm really mad right now." Fair enough. If a logical explanation works, I think that's awesome, but as we all know, kids aren't always logical, so I focused on being able to be with them through their emotions, even when they were focusing their anger on me. Of course, I was also getting paid, so I had all the patience in the world :wink: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868180 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 11:58:53 +0000 ballerinabee 1868180@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine says "don't tell me no" or "why you tell me no?" This morning he told me I was a "bad guy" when I told him no. At 2.5, I'm not sure how much of the "why" / explanation he retains / understands, but I like your idea of repeating the question back and explaining why you said no. It's a start! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868121 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 11:36:42 +0000 BoogieBea 1868121@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just saying the word 'no' always triggers a melt down. Lately, he tells me he's very angry. So I really try to explain why I'm refusing his request. It doesn't always work but most of the time, he's able contain his emotions better with a reason. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/do-your-kids-ever-say-youre-not-listening-or-are-mean-if-they-ask-for-something-and-you-say-no#post-1868099 Thu, 18 Sep 2014 11:28:43 +0000 mrbee 1868099@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our kids are so much better at listening lately (with lots of room still for improvement). One thing that I've struggled with though, is how our son will ask for something, I'll say no, and then he'll accuse me of not listening to him or being mean to him.</p> <p>Not sure how to convey to him that I did listen to him, but just decided not to give it to him. And how that's different from when we ask him to do something and he totally ignores us.</p> <p>Maybe I need to repeat his request back to him to let him know that I did hear it, and then explain to him why the answer is no. Rather than just saying no and getting frustrated when he says that I'm not listening or I'm being mean.</p> <p>Anyone else deal with this? </p>