https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 01:18:20 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227842 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 14:15:25 +0000 Mama Bird 2227842@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bushelandapeck: @HTownMom: same thing here! To listen to the day care, you'd think they were talking about a different child. I thought they were pulling my leg for a long time. But B's day care teacher, who manages to have ten toddlers more or less behaving themselves every day, also admits she could never get her own son to behave at that age. They just know they can get away with more at home! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227837 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 14:11:02 +0000 Applesandbananas 2227837@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes! LO is very feisty and very determined. </p> <p>We actually had an OT join his EI plan and she described him as a sensory seeker and encouraged us to give him the sensory inputs he needs before he seeks them out himself and gave us some great strategies. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227836 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 14:10:23 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227836@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@HTownMom: I hear the same thing! "he's so obedient!" I think he tends to push the limits more with me than with others. which is totally normal, but infuriating. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227827 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 14:01:41 +0000 HTownMom 2227827@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: How does he do with babysitters? My LO has lots of energy and can throw a tantrum like a boss, but all the babysitters we have had (10 or so), love her because she is so happy and fun. In fact, a couple of them have said they wish they could always watch kids like her! So I think she just does a lot of stuff with us because she knows she can get away with it! Or she is bored, hungry, tired, etc.<br /> Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227809 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 13:44:44 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 2227809@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My first is that way.... independent, strong-willed, determined, inquisitive, focused.... Although these are extremely trying times, I have to remember that these are the traits that are admirable in adults. I'm definitely struggling with it, but I have realized that she does tend to be a very sensitive kid.. so I try to appeal to that side of her when she's misbehaving. (and when all else fails, send in DH for reinforcements) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227798 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 13:35:41 +0000 bushelandapeck 2227798@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: DS goes to preschool and they tell me he does great! :) I 100% agree with you about needing to find activities that burn off the energy, otherwise we are in trouble! We get the comments about his energy level all the time. While usually well-meaning, it can often feel like criticism of my parenting abilities, as if I should somehow be able to slow him down whenever I want to. I wish! Haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227786 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 13:22:48 +0000 hilsy85 2227786@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: The main thing for me is LO's energy level--he just never stops moving. I"ve had strangers. family, etc comment on just how active he is. I do find that he does better if he is in situations where he can burn off energy freely--so a park, rather than a gym class, because sitting in a circle to sing hello is just asking for trouble. I do wonder how he will do when he starts preschool this fall, but am hoping that he will be better behaved for the teachers than for me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227773 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 13:11:42 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227773@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hilsy85: yes, this exactly. </p> <p>I have been reading a lot more about the temperements today and I am not completely convinced lo fits into the "feisty" category either. I guess these labels only match 60% of kids anyway, and the rest are on a spectrum? He is definitely not the extreme end of the spectrum, but it did help me to see that this might just be his personality, not just a complete failure in the parenting department... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227767 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 13:10:25 +0000 Mrs. Cheesecake 2227767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: I totally agree with you on the whole library storytime thing. DH has been bringing DS to storytime since he was 4 months old. He is now almost 2.5 and still it is hard for him to sit still through the whole thing. At home he loves to be read to and will quietly sit on our lap for a whole book or 2 or 3. But for whatever reason, has a difficult time at the library doing that. I'm not sure what it is, but it makes me wonder about him when I see other toddlers sitting "nicely" with their parents during storytime while mine is wandering around the room or constantly moving around while I try to get him to sit with me. I totally feel you, but unfortunately I'm not sure how to help you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227763 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 13:05:33 +0000 hilsy85 2227763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>oh my god yes. I don't know that he's just like the description, but he is EXTREMELY active, and can be very hard to manage. He is just not very...biddable. He has his own mind and likes to do things in his own time. In classes and activities, I am usually the only parent running up and down with him to keep him focused on the class, while all the otehr kids just follow along with the instructions. I too have cried in parking lots and restaurants because his behavior is just SO exhausting sometimes--he's not necessarily bad, I just feel like I always need to be on top of him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227696 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 12:16:23 +0000 daniellemybelle 2227696@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's interesting that my LO is both "slow to warm up" and "feisty." She is VERY physically active, which I think is common at this age, but I see other LOs her age that are a lot more compliant and not always getting into things. But when we are in new environments, she is very quiet and still at first. So, she will sit in my lap frozen for the first half of story time, and the second half she is bouncing off the walls and yelling. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227691 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 12:11:43 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bushelandapeck: yes, that sounds like us too. he gets overtired so so easily and when it happens it sets us into a downward spiral for weeks. we hardly ever see friends unless we have a babysitter because we can't ever be late for bedtime. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227684 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 12:06:19 +0000 bushelandapeck 2227684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: I would describe DS as energetic, independent, and determined :) He's going to be 3 next month and it has gotten slightly easier to manage his behaviors, but that's partially due to the fact that DH and I have learned that he is easily overstimulated and we leave parties, dinners, and other outings whenever we feel it's too much for him to handle, and we do so without getting upset at him because we know it's not something he can easily control. We find that he does best with a predictable routine and that too much preparation for things (like telling him about a party hours before we go) only makes things harder. He's a super social kid, but he does best with one or two other kids, and not in a setting where he is required to sit down for long periods of time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227682 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 12:02:34 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I agree. everything is so much easier when I set him up in environments where he can be successful. Even playgrounds are tough though because he fixated on anything with wheels...strollers and bikes (not ours of course) fascinate him, so even a place that is supposed to be an appropriate place to explore turns into a frustrating battle. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227659 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:42:00 +0000 kjpugs 2227659@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: that example is so my daughter. When we did Gymboree- even before she was a year!- the other kids would sit nicely with their parents in the circle and DD would run up to the teacher and when the gymbo doll came out, she would basically attack her for it. It was "cute" but she was also way less mobile and crazy then. I also notice the difference between her and her peers. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227655 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:37:46 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227655@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@kjpugs: yep... that sounds familiar...</p> <p>@ShootingStar: yeah, this sounds familiar too. dh always wants to let him walk and doesn't understand how hard that is for me when I'm alone, especially with both kids. </p> <p>I struggle with whether it is just age. I feel like that it is until I see him with a bunch of other kids the same age and he is so completely different. I stopped going to our library storytimes for over a year because it was just too hard. I tried to go again last week and we had to leave 3 minutes in because he will not just sit with me. he wants to be right in the action, and trying to hold him resulted in thrashing and screaming. there were probably 40 toddlers in there, all sitting quietly with their parents. I got to the parking lot and literally burst into rears. the extreme contrast between him and other kids makes me feel like I am doing something really really wrong...but he's not "bad", he is just so energetic and curious. I don't want to stifle that, but at what point is it a problem that needs to be dealt with and not something that's age appropriate? I have no idea </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227643 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:29:03 +0000 looch 2227643@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: Oh, I wasn't directing it towards you, I understand the term was from the article. </p> <p>Having an inflexible child is extremely challenging, I won't lie...it's about making sure that my son is in a mixture of environments where he will succeed and environments that push his boundaries as well as giving him the tools to learn to manage them.</p> <p>It means not forcing sitting down and practicing letters on a piece of paper, but instead taking the chalk outside and drawing the letters on the driveway to involve the whole body. It means sometimes having to leave functions early or when my son gets overstimulated. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227635 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:20:50 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227635@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I was using the term from the article. Apparently it is a label that is used to describe temperament? I liked it better than the other one they used (difficult). </p> <p>Do you have any suggestions for what has worked for you?? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227631 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:17:04 +0000 kjpugs 2227631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>(raises hand.) DD1 is so independent and bright and energetic which I LOVE, but when we go anywhere she just wants to run and climb and explore. She is not one to hold my hand and walk. She's not even 21 months so I have hopes that within a year she might be able to listen better, while I would focus on still giving her outlets for her energy. I just feel so frustrated and embarrassed currently. We just did my maternity pictures and we couldn't do any of just me and DH because she would just run- and I mean SPRINT - off happily if we weren't holding her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227614 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:05:45 +0000 looch 2227614@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I prefer not to use the term fiesty, to be honest, but my son is very inflexible.</p> <p>I disagree with the advice to wait it out, though, there are a ton of resources to help children work through that behaviour. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227608 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 11:03:26 +0000 ShootingStar 2227608@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: DS doesn't really fit the "feisty" description you linked to, but he does sound a bit like your son out in public. For my son I think a big part is age (he's 19 months) but some of it is curiosity and testing boundaries. For example, the couple time we try to just let him walk in a store it's a disaster. He does not listen whatsoever. We let him roam one night in Target and we basically had to keep pretending to run away from him to get him to follow us.</p> <p>So I've given up for a while on letting him walk and he must be in the stroller or the cart. At restaurants he must sit in the high chair. He's used to the high chair but he doesn't love the cart. But we try to keep moving and use different things to distract him. At the grocery store he gets animal crackers. Other stores we might give him the pacifier. </p> <p>For get togethers he's usually fine. But I would never take my son to a wedding. At least not for a few years. He's not capable of behaving appropriately at a wedding, but I don't think most toddlers are. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227564 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 10:26:23 +0000 LuLu Mom 2227564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, our doctor even calls her a "feisty" child. She has a one-track mind and it is her way or no way (or a HUGE meltdown.) She's been like this for about a year now, since 18 months or so. I've found little things that help us adapt, I know she's just fiercely independent but it doesn't make the behavior any easier to handle in public. I want to smack myself back in the day when I judged parents in stores, ect. for not controlling their child. I feel like I do everything I'm supposed too to correct/discipline but it doesn't matter she doesn't care about losing a toy or sitting in timeout, ect. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227563 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 10:26:05 +0000 Mama Bird 2227563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think DS is like that a bit. He's a very easygoing kid, but he has a very intense side, and when it comes out all you can do is duck and cover. I've had days when I couldn't get him off the playground for hours, he's perfectly willing to just go off somewhere on his own and not look back (and he's not even three!), and he can cry for an hour straight or stay up partying till midnight. I feel like this kind of determination could be a really good thing for him when he's older, if we're lucky and he channels it into something good. But till then... yeah... it's hard.</p> <p>I guess if he's acting out at an event, see if you can step out for a while so he can run around and let steam off, or take turns with someone watching him, so you have a few minutes to go up to the bride and groom and say congratulations, or eat something! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227557 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 10:22:42 +0000 fuzzypeaches 2227557@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have no advice, just commiseration. Can't take DS anywhere and there's a constant threat he will accidentally kill himself or someone else lol. I keep hoping he will grow us of it - remain curious but in a less intense way! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-anybody-else-have-a-feisty-child#post-2227547 Mon, 06 Jul 2015 10:09:07 +0000 Mrs. Lion 2227547@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am becoming increasingly discouraged every time I take my oldest anywhere...He is so curious and all over the place all the time, and has very little self control. When we give him directions, he hears them and obeys, but then 3 seconds later is doing the same thing all over again. Part of it is testing boundaries I think, but after reading some info about temperement I am thinking we may just have a "feisty" child, and I need to embrace it instead of feeling like there is something wrong. I do not have a single IRL friend who has a child like him....they all seem to have "flexible" children, who just go with the flow and can play when we are out places without constantly getting into everything. </p> <p>Anybody else out there dealing with this? Any tips on managing child-friendly but not child-centered events (like weddings or get together's) without feeling like everyone is constantly judging your kid?</p> <p><a href="http://www.earlylearningcoalitionsarasota.org/forms/2011/intentionalteaching/9%20Temperament%20Traits,%203%20Termperament%20Types.pdf" rel="nofollow">http://www.earlylearningcoalitionsarasota.org/forms/2011/intentionalteaching/9%20Temperament%20Traits,%203%20Termperament%20Types.pdf</a> </p>