https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 03 Apr 2026 19:09:48 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179495 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 13:49:27 +0000 heffalump 179495@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's awful! My mom knows better. My grandma would make comments to me when I was pregnant and my mom knew how much that upset me. I made her talk to my grandma about it because it got to the point where I was ready to not visit anymore, and then my grandma stopped saying things. She would tell me flat out lies like "You look good today!" and "You look like you're losing weight!" after the baby came instead. I was ok with the lies :)</p> <p>My mom does give me magazines and articles on losing weight though. So she says it, she just doesn't say it outloud. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179482 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 13:45:32 +0000 mrs. bird 179482@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: OMG, i can't believe your MIL feels like it's her place to talk about your body so much. you are more patient than i could ever be!</p> <p>my parents are pretty good about it, they try not to be critical of it and really only talked about it when i went through a phase where i lost too much weight and wasn't eating for days while still working out like a nut- since i had fallen under a healthy body fat %, it was out of a reasonable place of concern. now that i'm overweight &lt;sigh&gt; they don't say anything. my grandmothers have both been very vocal about weight and can be cruel. my ILs also like the talk about other people's weight, it makes me very uncomfortable and i've told them as long as we're healthy, neither i nor DH is interested in their feelings about our weight. they haven't said anything since. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179183 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 11:10:50 +0000 mrsjyw 179183@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ditto @chopsuey119. thankfully i've never had any comments from my parents or extended family. the only time they said something was when i had lost a good 15-20 pounds unexpectedly post-college due to some medical issues at the time. and they were supportive about it.</p> <p>it's either way tho, i don't think one's weight is something that others should talk about in judgemental fashion regardless of under/overweight being the issue.</p> <p>i've had people tell me taht i'm starving myself too thin and that i need to eat something fattening, etc. on/off all my life and it's really discouraging because i've never had issues with eating/working out/etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179164 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 11:02:30 +0000 Modern Daisy 179164@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My Mom has severe body image issues and unfortunately passed it down to me and my sister growing up. I have learned to completely tune her out though and it no longer affects me when she makes comments. When I was younger, she used to OBSESS over how thin I was and she was determined to make me gain weight. I was a healthy weight, just on the low end of the curve. Then after college when I gained weight she went crazy with passive aggressive hidden comments and still hasn't stopped. I totally tune her out and eat as much as I want around her - if she wants to starve herself in front of me to 'set a good example' that's her problem, not mine. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179062 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 09:42:31 +0000 autumnlove 179062@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@chibee: It must be a Chinese thing too! :-) My Mom and her friends love talking about how much weight so and so's daughter gained....did you see her arms?! I can't stand it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179059 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 09:39:19 +0000 LuLu Mom 179059@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I used to have problems with eating so my family knows this is a very senstive topic for me. I did gain some weight after meeting DH and my mom mentioned something to me in a very kind way. She has struggled with weight since having us kids, so I know she's just looking out for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179050 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 09:35:05 +0000 Rock n Roll 179050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dad made comments about how I need to head back to the gym six weeks after I had my daughter. I was not amused. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179044 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 09:30:58 +0000 chibee 179044@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>my mom does constantly but it doesn't really bother me. i think it's a cultural thing (korean) - the first thing my relatives do when they haven't seen me in a long time is to comment about my weight - "you lost weight" "you gained weight" - I don't really pay any attention to it. I know what my healthy weight is and I already know when I've gained weight. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-179031 Tue, 05 Jun 2012 09:20:59 +0000 GrapeCrush 179031@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>when i was pregnant the first question my DAD would ask me after my appointments was, 'how much weight did you gain?'. it was really frustrating. did i want to gain 40 pounds during pregnancy? no. but that's what it did...so lay off of me. i lost 30 pounds within the first 3 weeks pp, so no one has really said anything...but i'm waiting for it. my family has never been one to shy away from telling you if you look like you've gained a few pounds or if you look 'so good since you lost some weight' which doesn't help either. DH is always really good about my weight, and doesn't say anything negative, just encourages me if he knows it's bothering me and i want to do something about it. i've always had issues with my weight...i was a pretty chunky kid(along with my brothers) and it's something that i constantly think about. and the comments to stay with you...my dad told my brothers and i once that he didn't want fat children....thanks dad! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178699 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 19:15:45 +0000 autumnlove 178699@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: wow, sorry about your MIL! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178698 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 19:15:17 +0000 autumnlove 178698@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mediagirl: I have but she thinks comments about weight are fair game! :-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178684 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 19:07:08 +0000 Mrs. Pen 178684@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thankfully my mom never does. She has a weight problem, so I know she totally sympathizes. When I was in high school my sister used to make mean comments about my weight and it was very damaging. She had a mean streak in high school, we're really good friends now but she's tiny and lost all her baby weight quickly, and I'm holding onto nearly 20 lbs.</p> <p>@Mrsdaredevil: oh my gosh I would be soooo mad. And tell DH to tell her she's out of line! that's awful. I'm so sorry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178639 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 18:07:56 +0000 mediagirl 178639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: oh my. I'm sorry you have to deal with that!<br /> @autumnlove: Agh, how frustrating! Have you told her how her comments hurt you? </p> <p>My FIL told me I looked like I was fattening the both of us (hubs and me) up once when we were dating. I started crying at the dinner table. Awkward! He never mentioned my weight again but he loves to harp on my husband about his. Makes me so mad. Just because you have never had a problem with weight does not give you the right to tell your son he needs to lose weight! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178638 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 18:07:14 +0000 chopsuey 178638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom always tells me NOT to lose weight. But shes always been supportive no matter how big or small I am, </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178590 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:55:32 +0000 pastemoo 178590@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: Holy cow! That's awful!<br /> My mom used to bug me about my weight a lot. She stopped when I started coming to her crying because I couldn't slow my pregnancy weight gain. I'm a little nervous that I won't be able to lose the "extra" 20 pounds more than they wanted me to gain. (I gained 44, they said to gain 25, I now have lost 25 and have 19 pounds to go--the same 19 pounds they didn't want me to gain in the first place).<br /> She might start bugging me about my weight again, but I think she'll give me 2 months pp before she does (she better!!). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178572 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:38:53 +0000 MamaMoose 178572@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom often comments on my weight. Even when she is being positive and telling me I look good it just rubs me the wrong way. I don't want her to comment on it at all. My husband is the only person who I am comfortable talking with about my weight. He has never said anything negative to me but if at some point he did think I was overweight (especially if he was concerned about my health) I would absolutely want him to say something to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178570 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:37:46 +0000 DillonLion 178570@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: It seems like people like that have way worse issues with their own body/food/exercise than we do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178569 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:37:38 +0000 BoogieBea 178569@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom commented on the fact that I was still pudgy a month post partum. A month! I just walked away. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178568 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:36:08 +0000 MsLipGloss 178568@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsDaredevil: That's outrageous!!! Boooooooo to ridiculous requests and innapropriate questions/comments! I mean, seriously? WTH is wrong with people?!?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178565 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:33:26 +0000 DillonLion 178565@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrsdaredevil: Jeez! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178564 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:30:43 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 178564@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They don't make negative comments about it, but they always ask about it.<br /> My MIL is very concerned about looks and appearances, and she used to ask me after every single doctor appointment (when i was pregnant) how much weight I had gained. As soon as i had the baby, she started asking how much i had lost. Every time I see her she asks if she can see my stomach (I always say no). When I was pregnant, she also used to ask to see my stretch marks, and then brag about how she never got them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178562 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:29:18 +0000 MsLipGloss 178562@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Highwire: Yep. All it takes is one comment. And when that comment comes from someone that you love and care about (mom), it makes it that much more powerful and impactful. </p> <p>I am pregnant with a baby girl. I hope and pray every day that I make her feel smart, beautiful, and worthwhile, and that she will see herself as a whole, and not just a sum of her parts. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178560 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:28:14 +0000 Rubies 178560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom constantly tells me how much harder I should be trying to lose my pregnancy weight (still holding onto 15-17lbs). She says I was "sooo pretty" when I was thinner. :(</p> <p>It makes me sad because I struggled with my weight my whole life and I've had such a hard time losing weight. My mom doesn't say it to be mean, she thinks she's being encouraging. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178558 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:24:48 +0000 DillonLion 178558@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsLipGloss: That's the thing that drives me to crazy. As soon as the comment is out there, it is almost chiseled into my brain and I can't ever forget about it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178557 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:23:26 +0000 MsLipGloss 178557@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What What What? That stinks! I'm so sorry, and I would have been angry, too. :( </p> <p>The only time my family comments on my weight is when they think I am too thin. And they haven't made any comments about my weight during my pregnancy because nobody has seen me yet (I will be 27 weeks this week). I am supposed to see my in-laws in a couple of weeks, so, we'll see how that goes. But I do know that *everyone* expects me to snap right back into shape because of what I looked like pre-pg. We have a large family event 1 month after I deliver, and I am already sweating the comments about whether I have not lost enough or lost too much . . . it stresses me out almost more than thinking about labor!</p> <p>My mom made a couple of comments about my body when I was a kid that I will never forget. They weren't negative comments per se, but they did cause me to obsess about certain parts of my body, and I still do, no matter how small I am. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178554 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:18:25 +0000 kml636 178554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>OMG. SO RUDE. You are at a perfectly healthy weight! Ugh! I am also very sensitive about it, I have an aunt who is obese herself yet told me I needed to lose 10 lbs before my wedding, and since then she brings it up each time I see her. I told her I didn't need any unsolicited advice and she blew up over it. whatever, it's so upsetting others think they can comment. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178549 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:12:12 +0000 DillonLion 178549@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm extremely sensitive about any comments about my weight. My family has never said anything to me growing up or now, but DH has a few times and it has been a HUGE source of contention between us to the point of us having to go to couples counseling for it (among a few other issues). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-momfamily-members-make-comments-about-your-weight#post-178546 Mon, 04 Jun 2012 16:08:17 +0000 autumnlove 178546@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am 5'2" and was 124 pre pregnancy. I gained 33lbs during pregnancy and lost it all by 6-7 weeks post partum. </p> <p>I just called my Mom during my pump break and she asked me about my current weight. She told me I should lose more because she noticed I got really fat in recent years and I should be 105-110lbs. She said she never mentioned it before since it would probably upset me but it was time to be candid.<br /> I got angry and told her I had to go back to work!</p> <p>Does your Mom/family members make comments about your weight? I am so annoyed right now! :-( </p>