https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 24 May 2026 07:02:44 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771441 Thu, 09 May 2013 18:30:15 +0000 PointeShoesTutus 771441@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are learing to fight fair. I guess you could say its a work in progress. I'm a bit of a yeller and he tends to shut down so that doesn't always turn out so well. I'm trying not to yell and he's trying to verbalize his feelings. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771270 Thu, 09 May 2013 17:37:52 +0000 DigAPony 771270@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My husband doesn't yell or say mean/unfair/manipulative things, but it is usually pretty difficult for me to get him to talk about what's bothering him or to respond to me when we're having an argument. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771260 Thu, 09 May 2013 17:33:34 +0000 petunia354 771260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We both hate yelling so we tend to be pretty calm. Although when he knows I' mad at him he'll shut down and just walk away and not talk to me for a while. He just doesn't know how to deal with that....whereas all I want to do is talk and that annoys him! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771252 Thu, 09 May 2013 17:30:22 +0000 sorrycharlie 771252@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>ugh. he doesn't do that (I'm more of the one who says 'you know why i'm mad!' but then won't say), but he definitely gets dirty sometimes. he very often would throw around the 'yup. i'm such a horrible person. maybe you should have married someone who does the dishes/shuts the door/xyz." Um, wtf? that's not ok to throw around!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771189 Thu, 09 May 2013 16:59:53 +0000 heffalump 771189@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Were pretty nice fighters. I have a no yelling rule so it kind if forces us just to talk things out calmly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771178 Thu, 09 May 2013 16:57:37 +0000 LindsayInNY 771178@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ehhh, we're not the cleanest of fighters. We don't usually go down "that" path with things you shouldn't say. But we're both stubborn and it's takes time for one of us to raise the white flag. I wasn't really taught to apologize at home either so that's been a learning curve for me. I am guilty of the "why don't you leave me" and bad D-word comments. I don't know why, it just comes out =/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771152 Thu, 09 May 2013 16:47:25 +0000 StbHisMrs 771152@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs. bird: Ooohh he's thrown that phrase at me before, I think he took the hint when I got in the car and left. I hate that kind of talk..<br /> @.twist.: I think he's just sulking. He's been working graveyard and he's not use to it. I told him I wasn't going to acknowledge anymore of this until he tells me what I've done. He's stopped. I swear, sometimes they're worse than kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-771108 Thu, 09 May 2013 16:28:36 +0000 swurlygurl 771108@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: Oh yes - us too. As soon as I know he's mad, here come the tears. Then he gets madder, and I cry more... it's ridiculous.</p> <p>He does not fight fair, because if it was up to me, there would be no fighting. I seriously never get angry and am so easy going about everything. If he does something bad/wrong, I just assume he didn't do it on purpose and move on. Not him though! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770681 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:51:00 +0000 .twist. 770681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrs. bird: Ugh. That kind of talk is one of my biggest pet peeves. My husband used to do this when we were dating and would even tell me to leave and not come back because he just "wasn't good enough and I need to find someone better". I told him never to ever say that shit again. lol. He's been pretty good about it when we're fighting. Now, it's kind of shifted and when he's feeling down about himself he'll say stuff like "I know you deserve someone better". argargarg! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770661 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:46:12 +0000 Bookish 770661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes and no. He's the type that runs on a slow boil. It takes quite a bit to make him mad - most things just roll off his back. But man, when he gets really worked up about something, he's definitely the type to get overly upset and then have to storm off and go for a walk to cool down.</p> <p>To his credit though, he has never, ever called me a name or made me feel in danger, which is a serious problem I had with my exes. He always knows to go cool off. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770660 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:45:34 +0000 mrs. bird 770660@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsTiz: you're us! </p> <p>we *try* to fight fair. we try not to ever call names, but he def has a temper. he might be unhappy with me about something &amp; get distant, but if he's MAD, i'll know it (and so will all our neighbors...). he often gets distracted when we're having a disagreement &amp; rather than fighting about the matter at hand likes to question whether i really made the best choice when we got married, that maybe someone else would be better suited for me &amp; then he'll take his ring off &amp; ask me how i like it &amp; continue to yell at me waving his hand with a missing ring in my face- it's awesome, then he leaves &amp; comes back when he feels like it. ugh. fighting sucks. i'm sorry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770657 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:44:50 +0000 .twist. 770657@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@StbHisMrs: ugh. that is really not fair of him. I would try to calmly explain that you actually don't know what's wrong and it's making you feel upset that you can't fix it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770627 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:40:26 +0000 StbHisMrs 770627@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@.twist.: I keep asking and he keeps telling me that I already know... Then he says forget it and quits talking, I'm at work so this is via texts and it's so aggravating!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770622 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:38:54 +0000 illumina 770622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, very. Infact, he doesn't *fight* at all, he either talks to me about things really calmly or just lets insignificant things go. I've learned a lot from him and I've become calmer for it :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770611 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:37:30 +0000 .twist. 770611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>He has learned. We have both learned how to be more fair to each other. I have learned to give him more space when we are upset, and he has learned not to wait so long to talk to me. </p> <p>For the most part I would say that yes, we fight pretty fair! As fair as you can when you're totally pissed off at each other. hahaha</p> <p>Sorry your DH is upset, can you ask him what's the matter? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770610 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:37:28 +0000 runsyellowlites 770610@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Eek. No, for the most part we both fight fair. We do tend to both blameshift, initially, but also both apologize pretty quick for however we each attributed to the issue.</p> <p>I'm sorry you &amp; your DH are struggling in this area. G's dad never fought fair &amp; it was SO hard to deal with! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770596 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:35:04 +0000 MrsTiz 770596@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>No, not at all. He's a yeller and i'm a cryer so we don't fight well together </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/does-your-significant-other-fight-fair#post-770590 Thu, 09 May 2013 14:33:31 +0000 StbHisMrs 770590@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine does not. He's mad at me for something I did on Monday, I have absolutely no idea what, I didn't know we'd been fighting all week either, how oblivious am I?<br /> This is so frustrating!!!!</p> <p>Does your significant other tell you why they're mad at you, shift all the blame into your lap, and then not tell you what it's about? </p>