https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 18 May 2026 13:06:11 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921519 Thu, 17 Dec 2020 17:34:21 +0000 hellobeeboston 2921519@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our Elf is mostly just silly entertainment, and he delivers letters to Santa... It's fun. It doesn't need to be a whole huge thing if you don't set that expectation. Ours just moves around, and occasionally is doing something cute or mischievous, but he mostly just moves around the living room. Kids still love it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921378 Mon, 07 Dec 2020 14:18:29 +0000 Clementine12 2921378@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: just here to commiserate- we are really hoping to avoid the elf too although the creative set ups are so cute. But DD1 (3 yo) told me earlier this year that Santa doesn't bring presents to bad kids and I immediately told her that no, Santa brings a present for you no matter what and we need to be good for the sake of being good. I was shocked that the good/bad Santa bit was already in her psyche! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921331 Fri, 04 Dec 2020 22:14:15 +0000 minimalistmom 2921331@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't plan on it because I don't need yet another reason for my 5 year old DS to wake me up in the morning. For those who think the elf looks creepy, apparently there is a snowman version. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921330 Fri, 04 Dec 2020 22:07:28 +0000 LemonJack 2921330@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We’ve had ours for a few years, and we really like it! Our kids remember the silly places they found her and talk about her throughout the year. We don’t do many elaborate set ups, but the kids still think it’s great to look for her each morning. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921284 Thu, 03 Dec 2020 13:14:28 +0000 ElbieKay 2921284@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This JUST came up yesterday with my 6yo. I blame his art teacher for having an Elf in the background on her Zoom.</p> <p>Anyway, I told him that I don't think there are good and bad kids, just good and bad behavior. So I told Santa that we don't need an Elf because we don't need someone to report back on whether or not we have good kids. And also that I found the idea of the Elf spying on us to be a little creepy.</p> <p>Then I told him that other families like having the Elf as a fun holiday tradition. That's fine for them, and we have to be respectful of their choices. But I did not think the Elf was the right choice for our family.</p> <p>Once I characterized it as creepy, my son told me that he agreed with my logic, and he was happy that his status as a good kid was locked in for Christmas! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921283 Thu, 03 Dec 2020 13:03:16 +0000 MrsSCB 2921283@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: FWIW, while my kids are younger and I don't think have heard of the elf (yet?), I would do the same thing as you. I see why the "surveillance" part is creepy, but seems easy enough to leave that out, and otherwise, I have nothing against the little guy haha. I'm mostly just lazy and not wanting to think of a ton of ideas. But I bet there are plenty on Pinterest to help, and the candy cane toboggan sounds fun. My son would honestly love it! So I don't blame you for going for it :-) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921280 Thu, 03 Dec 2020 12:13:23 +0000 Jessiemuller88 2921280@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: this made me laugh. I’ve been having so much fun with it too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921278 Thu, 03 Dec 2020 10:34:48 +0000 erinbaderin 2921278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LadyDi: Fair enough - my kids also burst into my room this morning all excited to go find out what the elf was doing, and I found myself googling ways to "hack it" by putting wire in it to make it more poseable, so I feel a bit like a hypocrite of on the one hand saying "I hate it and I'm just doing it for the kids!" and on the other hand, building the elf a toboggan out of candy canes. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921277 Thu, 03 Dec 2020 10:09:13 +0000 LadyDi 2921277@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: I don't think it's creepy and my kids love hunting for him in the morning. Mostly he shows up and moves around at night. No elaborate set ups. But, I don't emphasize the whole "reporting back to Santa" thing. We read the book once a couple of years ago, but I don't think my oldest even remembers that. Although my almost 3 year old has been driving me nuts lately, so if I though telling him/threatening him with the elf would change his behavior at this point I would probably do it lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921276 Thu, 03 Dec 2020 08:42:48 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2921276@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: oh my gosh, I didn't know your husband was Hindu, mine is too (Jain, more specifically, but not very observant). And I'm half Jewish, though on the wrong side (dad) so it technically doesn't count LOL We've always told our daughter that we can take whatever parts of holidays that come from her various cultures (so we do a little Diwali, a little Hannukah, a little Christmas) and learn about others (her kindergarten class was heavily Muslim so she learned all about Ramadan and Eid and we've read about Kwanzaa and others). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921269 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 20:36:55 +0000 erinbaderin 2921269@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: Oh noooo! Although I wonder if all the parents actually think the elves are creepy? All my friends who I’ve talked to about this have basically said “it’s creepy and I hate it but the kids love it” If I had heard of that I would just be impressed that you held your ground instead of insta-caving like I did, I would feel shamed. </p> <p>And I hear you on the Christmas stuff! Althing I’ve been impressed by my son’s kindergarten class this year - he’s been bopping around the house singing a song about Diwali and informed me that we need to start celebrating Chinese New Year. </p> <p>Honestly, though, this kind of low-stakes Pinterest stuff is right up my alley - do some google searches, five minutes of taping stuff, the kids think it’s awesome. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921267 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 19:17:12 +0000 Anagram 2921267@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: we have also talked about how everyone celebrates different holidays, not everyone does Christmas, etc. and both of my girls have Jewish BFFs, so I guess I thought they’d be a little more elevated than “my mom thinks the elves are creepy and we’re good, so we don’t need them”, so clearly, I was wrong! :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921266 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 19:15:01 +0000 Anagram 2921266@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: my 7 year old has been lobbying hard for an elf, but I’m not into it at all. So I told her I find the elves creepy, and I also said my kids are so well-behaved that they don’t need elves watching them all the time. I thought I was SO CLEVER. </p> <p>Until, her zoom class on Dec 1, when all the kids were talking about their elves, and my 7 year old unmuted herself just to say, “my mom says the elves are creepy, and that we are good so we don’t need an elf to watch us”. :shocked: :meh: </p> <p>I should have known that would happen. </p> <p>I hate “Christmas shaming”, so I wouldn’t intentionally do it to someone else, so I was totally embarrassed. But man, I get tired of the Christmas dominance sometimes. My husband is Hindu, she has several Jewish classmates, but there’s like, this 15 minute convo discussing whose elves did what during school zoom. </p> <p>Anyway, I give up! It was embarrassing, but oh well. She didn’t get to talk about what she did for Diwali in class, soooo. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921261 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 13:22:16 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2921261@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter and I walked past a Nativity scene on our walk yesterday and she asked me about it so I told her the story and added my usual statement that I give with anything religious - "people who believe in X believe that" (followed by story) and holiday celebrations look different for everyone. The elf hasn't come up here or in the past, but if it does, my plan will be the same - to tell her that Santa visits everyone in different ways. For a few years now, I've been pulling apart the LEGO advent calendar and leaving a daily red gift bag for my daughter in different places around the house with that day's LEGO. I would tell her that the elf doesn't visit us but we get the LEGOs, which others may not. I find the whole elf thing creepy and don't want to mess with it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921260 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 12:37:19 +0000 misolee 2921260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We don’t do it either (kids 8, 4, 2). The younger two don’t really know about it. The older one asks about it every year and I’m with @hitchhiker...I don’t care about other family’s elf and traditions and I tell that to my oldest. As much as I want my children to have warm fuzzies about Christmas tradition and the holidays, I’m not sold on this idea or the work committed to it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921257 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 10:22:00 +0000 Jessiemuller88 2921257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is our first year to have one. Like others, we read the story, and I tend to just focus more on the kindness piece. Like I make a big deal, and I sometimes mention the elf noticing DS’s (4) good behavior and kindness to others. </p> <p>The elf has created some extra fun and excitement, and I’m enjoying moving him around at night! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921256 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 09:52:22 +0000 ALV91711 2921256@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bakingdoodle: I like that the teacher did this. </p> <p>My boys are 7 &amp; 2 and I don’t do the elf. I find him creepy! Plus I just don’t have the energy. DS1 has one in their kindergarten class a couple years ago but doesn’t seem to care that we don’t have one. He has mentioned it and Injust said we don’t do that, we do other things. That was good enough for him. </p> <p>DH wanted to get one a couple years back. I told him to have at it, it would be his full responsibility and I wouldn’t be helping. We didn’t get one! Lol. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921255 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 09:21:01 +0000 Bluemasonjar 2921255@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DS is 5 and I am waiting for him to come home and say something about the elf. I really don't want to introduce it as we have enough holiday traditions as it is and I would rather focus on those. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921253 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 09:10:02 +0000 erinbaderin 2921253@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bakingdoodle: This would have been great! In the light of day I'm realizing that I could have done all sorts of things to get out of it, but this is such a good idea to head off all the "Why don't we have it?" talk. Because it was fairly easy for me to run out and drop $45 (!!!!!) on this stupid thing to make my kids happy but not everybody has that option. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921252 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 09:01:52 +0000 bakingdoodle 2921252@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't mention it to my kids.... but if they did come back about it, I would say we are not celebrating the elves but we can make elves cookies ( I like to bake cookies with them)</p> <p>I like that my 2nd grade teacher wrote us this email:</p> <p>Elf on the Shelf - I know each family celebrates this tradition differently, some not at all. Each year after Thanksgiving, the elf shows up and the students are very excited to share stories with their friends. This year is different. Some families have opted out of having an elf. Please be mindful of this when your child comes to school. I am asking that you discuss with your child your tradition and how you are celebrating or not celebrating and ask you child to be mindful of others feelings. Thank you!</p> <p>I think it's fair and make sense. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921251 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 08:55:55 +0000 hitchhiker 2921251@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>There is no way I am adding another holiday task to my list, and so far I seem to have gotten away with it (kids are 7 and 4). But I am also a firm believer that each family develops its own holiday traditions, so I don't really GAF if all the other kids have elves - we are doing us, which includes learning that moms don't exist solely to "spark joy" in others. </p> <p>Ha. Clearly I am already feeling burnt out by the holiday season! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921249 Wed, 02 Dec 2020 07:38:31 +0000 erinbaderin 2921249@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Lahela017: I agree, I hate it! Last year my younger son was too young and my older son had one in his classroom so it was ok but this year my older one, in particular, seemed genuinely upset that all his friends had this and we didn’t so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.</p> <p>We ditched the book completely and he came with a note that said he’s here to bring holiday spirit and enjoy our fun, but he’s the reindeer keeper so he has to fly home every night to feed the reindeer which explains why a) he moves around and b) they can’t touch him (he’d lose his flying magic). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921235 Tue, 01 Dec 2020 21:28:45 +0000 Lahela017 2921235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ugh, this is my fear. My daughter is only 18 months now, but I don't ever want to do elf on the shelf. I think they are so creepy!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921233 Tue, 01 Dec 2020 21:17:32 +0000 Fawn 2921233@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter is 18 months so we don't have an elf now though we also do not like the idea that the elf is there to watch you and report back to Santa. We don't plan to teach our daughter that an old man is watching her to see if she behaves, eek just seems creepy. </p> <p>If we do decide to buy an elf in the coming years I plan to come up with a different story. Something like, the elf worked hard all year getting ready for Christmas and gets to go on vacation every December to spend the holidays with a family, so we will treat him/her as our holiday guest for the month of December. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921231 Tue, 01 Dec 2020 21:09:57 +0000 wrkbrk 2921231@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: Google the kindness elves! Like you, I didn’t love the traditional elf idea that morality is tied to whether or not someone is looking. The kindness elves move around each night while my son sleeps, but in the morning all they do is leave a note with a suggestion of a random act of kindness! (And maybe a Hershey’s kiss) :) This is my first year doing an elf too - my son (5) just started realizing that it’s a thing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921225 Tue, 01 Dec 2020 16:42:08 +0000 BadgerMom 2921225@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We read the book that comes with the elf every year but other than that I don’t put too much focus on the surveillance aspect. I never make those kind of statements while he’s here and so far it doesn’t seem like DS sees him that way. He never mentions anything with regards to being good for the elf. Our elf just moves around the house and occasionally wears silly costumes, but no elaborate tricks. I think he can totally just be a fun tradition without all the baggage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-2#post-2921223 Tue, 01 Dec 2020 16:07:46 +0000 erinbaderin 2921223@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My kids came home from school today asking why their Elf didn't come. I've gotten away from it every other year, but this year they seemed really hurt and disappointed that their friends had elves and they didn't. I have no problem acquiring one (except that they're sold out everywhere!) but I do have a problem telling them that the Elf reports back to Santa on their behaviour.</p> <p>If you do Elf on the Shelf but you don't use him as a surveillance tool for good behaviour, what's your story? He's just an elf who comes to visit during Christmas to spread holiday spirit? </p>