https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 21 Apr 2026 10:08:47 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-453811 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 14:33:14 +0000 Charcole2011 453811@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>this is one of the things that bugs me the most about the elf on the shelf in the first place! it's one heck of a marketing ploy for the company, that's for sure. I really don't like the idea but it does worry me what our LO will feel like eventually if he/she is the only one without an elf! hopefully some of the PPs are right and it will fade away before my LO is old enough (I'm pregnant with our first now, due in July - so we have a couple of years, at least)! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-453661 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 13:19:06 +0000 Adira 453661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mewtill: I agree with you 100%! I think part of the thing that bugs me about the Elf is that part of its job is to get your kids to behave. I think if you can't get them to behave without having an elf watch over them, something is wrong.</p> <p>I also think, I'll continue to just be honest with my friend's daughter, even if my friend isn't. If she asks me about the elf again, I'll tell her we don't have one. I shouldn't have to lie to her just because her mom did! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-453633 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 12:59:09 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 453633@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Honeybee: +1! I don't understand why some families don't explain to their children that other people's lives are different from their own.<br /> I think it's actually irresponsible of the friend to insist that the story she told her daughter is true for everyone, even when there's perfectly good evidence that it's not. Especially since she's assuming OP will be doing those same traditions. Also, it really bugs me when adults treat children like they can't understand things. Like, when they think lying is better than just explaining the truth. (I don't think Elf on the Shelf/Santa are bad ideas or lies, but I do think saying "oh, the elf is hiding" *is* a lie and I feel like that is wrong)</p> <p>@Adira: Hopefully you're right that when you have a child, your friend's LO will be too old to care. But if it were me, I would admit that we didn't have one and wouldn't if LO pressed me.</p> <p>@LemonLong: That's a really good point, but that's also the part that bugs me about the Elf. If a child can't behave without an elf spying on them, maybe that child needs more consequences from the parents? Because, honestly, if a kid misbehaves with the Elf around is a parent really going to take away Christmas presents? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-453065 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 09:10:38 +0000 Adira 453065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LemonLong: That's a good point actually! I didn't think of that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-453059 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 09:07:16 +0000 LemonLong 453059@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She probably told her daughter there's an elf in every house to encourage good behavior when they are visiting in other people's homes, if it were me I'd go with it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452994 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 08:29:18 +0000 Adira 452994@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@matador84: I agree!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452991 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 08:25:35 +0000 matador84 452991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@adira I know I say that and I wouldn't want to wreck it for the kid, but elf on a shelf is a genius marketing ploy!!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452987 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 08:23:47 +0000 Adira 452987@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@cvbee: HAHAHAHA</p> <p>@swedishfish: Did your student think it was real? Because I thought you couldn't touch the elf or it lost all it's magic?</p> <p>@Sweet T: I know, right??? I'm guessing she had already told her daughter that there's an elf in every house, so she was sticking to what she had already said, but I don't know why she would have even said that in the first place!</p> <p>@matador84: haha, I was totally tempted to say that, but I didn't want to upset my friend! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452936 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 07:19:21 +0000 matador84 452936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I used to think the elf on a shelf was cute and fun, but the more I read about it the more ridiculous it is!! This would tick me off and I would probably just be like, no your mom is wrong all homes don't have an elf. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452904 Tue, 18 Dec 2012 04:41:30 +0000 Sweet T 452904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My family has been doing the Elf on the Shelf for my sister for 5 years or so and she's never been under the impression that every house has an elf. I don't understand why your friend didn't just agree with you. I would've just told her that you don't have any kids for the Elf to watch so there's not an Elf at your house. Either way, I think your friend put you in a bit of a weird position. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452549 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 21:47:50 +0000 cvbee 452549@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Maybe the kid is right. Maybe you do have an elf in your house and you just never noticed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452359 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 19:27:26 +0000 swedishfish 452359@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I have a student in 5th grade who brought in her Elf on the Shelf book to show me a couple of weeks ago. She was so excited about it. I was kind of shocked that a 10 year old was so into the elf. Hopefully your friend's daughter will lose interest in the elf quickly! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452338 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 19:01:51 +0000 Bao 452338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Honeybee: I was going to say this exactly!! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452234 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 17:30:32 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 452234@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a feeling this will fade away! I remember it from a few years ago and now its back in full force. Hopefully it will die off before I have kids! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452217 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 17:25:37 +0000 mrsmenow 452217@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jedeve: We aren't getting on the elf train either. I have said told my kids that we don't need an elf because they behave so well. I really hope this elf on a shelf fades away quickly. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-452185 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 17:15:06 +0000 jedeve 452185@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Andrea: @Adira: I agree. I'm hoping its a trend that disappears! I think the Santa Claus tradition has a little more staying power than the elf thing does, haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451938 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 14:53:51 +0000 Adira 451938@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@blackbird: haha, I think I'm a jerk too - I tried to say that we don't have an elf visiting us, but my friend "corrected" me because apparently what I was saying didn't mesh with what she's told her daughter. Her daughter is 3 though, so maybe by the time my kid is old enough to care, she'll be too old to care! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451907 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 14:38:25 +0000 blackbird 451907@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's certainly your friend's responsibility to correct her own kid, and I'm probably a jerk and if someone flat out asked me if we had an Elf, I'd just say no, the Elf does not visit us. Maybe she will have it more figured out by next year....my SIL does the Elf and my nephew is 5 and doesn't really buy it :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451890 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 14:28:31 +0000 heffalump 451890@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're Jewish, so we will not have an elf. Just like we do not have Santa. I don't think it's fair to say that EVERY house has these things because we don't. We don't have a Christmas tree, Christmas lights, etc. </p> <p>We will make sure that our LO knows that Santa, the elf, etc. are real so that my child doesn't ruin it for the other kids, but I would be pretty offended if someone came into my house and told their LO there is an elf in my Jewish house. </p> <p>I will simply tell my LO that Santa and his elf don't come to our house. We are Jewish and we celebrate Chanukah instead, and I'll start talking about the fun things that we do and explain the story of Chanukah. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451727 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 13:09:07 +0000 Andrea 451727@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: yeah, I think it's still too new for her to have done that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451724 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 13:07:13 +0000 Adira 451724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Andrea: That's my understanding!!! I mean, maybe the Elf on the Shelf will become a timeless tradition like other things, but since it's not as common-place as other traditions, it seems unfair of my friend to tell her kid stuff that affects MY family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451707 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:56:25 +0000 Andrea 451707@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: not cool of your friend! Hopefully, she can revise what she told her LO! I am fine with explaining Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc. Those have been traditions for a while but this Elf is just some new fad, right? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451672 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:38:24 +0000 Adira 451672@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Honeybee: You're definitely right about the Elf being the same as other holiday traditions that not everyone celebrates all the same things and we need to figure out a way to explain that to our kids. I'll definitely try to talk to my friend and hopefully she can explain to her daughter why we don't have an elf in a way that makes sense! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451644 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:28:03 +0000 Honeybee 451644@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Maybe you can talk to your friend about revising what she's told her daughter? It's kind of awkward for you...</p> <p>I guess I don't see the Elf any different from other holidays traditions/figures? If you celebrate Santa, and your LO thinks Santa is real, you may one day have to explain why some child at school told her Santa is just a fictional, holiday tradition. Or if you don't celebrate Santa, you might have to explain to your LO some day why some families celebrate Santa but your family doesn't. Or the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc... I do think most young children are perfectly satisfied with the explanation that different families have different traditions, though, which is why most kids don't question Santa, etc... until 6/7 or older. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451622 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:20:33 +0000 Adira 451622@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jacks: Yeah, originally when her daughter asked about our elf, I said "I don't think Santa sent one to our house" but then my friend corrected me that there's an elf at EVERY house and we probably just haven't seen ours! I was kind of annoyed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451612 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:16:51 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 451612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I worried about this too when we made our decision not to do the Elf. It was part of our consideration, however. I would have been frustrated with the parents who told their kid that you do have an elf. That seems to put undue pressure on you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451591 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:05:23 +0000 Adira 451591@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Honeybee: Thank you for your input! I totally agree that I think it should fall on my friend to correct her daughter about this, but she has apparently told her that ALL households have elves, whether you can see them or not, and that we probably haven't seen our elf because we don't have any children yet. She gave her daughter the impression that when our son is born, she'll be more likely to be able to find the elf at our house, and I wanted to be like "WTF! We're not getting an elf so don't tell your kid that!"</p> <p>Good idea about explaining the different holiday traditions to our kids! I definitely plan to do that! My worry is when what I explain to my kids don't match what other kids think - like my friend's daughter thinking there is an elf at every house, and my kid will just think it's a holiday tradition that their family does and ours doesn't. I'm just not sure how it will unfold! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451588 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:02:36 +0000 Mrsbells 451588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Honeybee: I agree with you. The friend should have a story or explanation for their child rather than making you guys feel awkward about it </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451579 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 12:00:50 +0000 Honeybee 451579@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We do Elf on a Shelf but DD knows that not all families have an elf. We tall about our elf "adoption" story so she knows we didn't always have an elf and not all families have adopted an elf for their own.</p> <p>I think the responsibility here lies with your friend to correct her daughter; not eberyone has an elf, not everyone celebrates Christmas, etc... If you don't Elf on a Shelf it will probably be a few years before your LO starts asking why you don't have an elf. At which point you can explain it like any other holiday tradition. Santa visits some people, but other people celebrate different holidays, some people have adopted.elves but some people Santa just checks in on individually, some people go to church on Christmas and some people don't, etc.. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/elf-on-the-shelf-amp-friends-los#post-451574 Mon, 17 Dec 2012 11:57:45 +0000 Weagle 451574@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We weren't planning on doing Elf on the Shelf or even really make a big deal about Santa, but my mom has already bought the book and is super excited about it all. </p> <p>You could say that your elf had an especially hard journey back from the North Pole and he's taking a nap. Or that he's shy and hides when company comes over. :) </p>