https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 10 Apr 2026 14:26:46 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2894739 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 11:21:09 +0000 JCCovi 2894739@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: That's bizarre! If it was just 1 kid I might think it was a dream or something. For both of them to come up with that story... weird.</p> <p>My daughter has a 1st-grade teacher we've heard lots about and expect to be good, but I don't think she'll be able to live up to the beloved Kinder teacher! They have subject teachers at this school and the English teacher is the only one who is staying the same from last year, but the math teacher is one who she's been with during summer camp so that should be good. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2894724 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 09:32:14 +0000 erinbaderin 2894724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have two more weeks before B starts SK - I can't believe it! I had a bit of a problem this week - another mom texted me to say that she didn't know if she had the whole story but her kids (two boys, good friends with B, both in his daycare) had told her that B had been calling the younger one names like poophead and then had pulled his pants and underwear down so everyone saw him naked and the daycare teacher had to talk to him. This didn't sound like B so I asked him and he said no, that had never happened. I called the daycare and talked to the teacher who allegedly had to talk to him and she also said no, that had never happened. WTF? So that's kind of a weird situation that I'm not really sure what to do with - the older boy is B's best friend, they live next door and we see them all the time, and the mom said that both kids had talked repeatedly to both her and her husband about this "situation". She was pretty upset with them and said she'd talk to them, but I'm still...I don't know, not sure how to feel.</p> <p>Otherwise just waiting on back to school stuff - I'm pretty sure B will have the same teaching aide but a different teacher, so I have my fingers crossed that they're as great as his last year teacher, who we loved. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2894714 Fri, 16 Aug 2019 08:49:31 +0000 JCCovi 2894714@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My daughter just started 1st grade this week! Where has the time gone?</p> <p>Nothing else to add, just bumping this thread to hear how 1st is starting off for everyone... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877329 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 18:31:18 +0000 Anagram 2877329@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@hellobeeboston: kissing!? My husband would have a heart attack. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877289 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 14:18:38 +0000 hellobeeboston 2877289@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: yeah I could see that being a little weird... my son all of a sudden in K started having 'crushes' and there was a lot of kissing going around in class, and on the bus... I'm hoping it was just a phase when they were all new &amp; in class together. I haven't heard about anymore kissing... but yeah.... can't believe it's all starting already. :meh: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877244 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 09:18:32 +0000 Adira 2877244@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@erinbaderin: I definitely agree that the encouragement is weird. I haven't experienced that - just had the girl's parent tell me "Oh, you're Xander's mom? My daughter told me they were going to get married. But I told her she might change her mind when she's older, haha." So we had a similar response. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877241 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 09:05:31 +0000 erinbaderin 2877241@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Fair enough, B did tell me he was going to marry his little brother because he couldn't marry me, since I was already married. But I still think it's weird that all the other parents are calling it a "love triangle" and encouraging it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877236 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 08:40:42 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2877236@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: Oh mercy, that's intense! We haven't run into this, thankfully. I'm not even sure DD knows what a crush or any kind of romantic relationship is. Mostly she tells us she's going to live with us forever and doesn't need anyone else LOL </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877233 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 08:16:52 +0000 Adira 2877233@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: @erinbaderin: I think it's probably normal for this age? I know Xander said he was going to marry one of the girls in his class. But he also said he wanted to marry his best boy friend. And preferably both his best boy friends. And if he couldn't marry both of them, then he'd marry one and the other would have to just live with them, or at least next door.</p> <p>I basically just said "That's nice, but you might change your mind when you grow up. And you can only marry someone if they also want to marry you, but you can figure it out once you're an adult." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877230 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 08:11:03 +0000 erinbaderin 2877230@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: WOW. That would make me super uncomfortable. And I kind of judge the parents for encouraging it! At a birthday party we were at in January one of the other moms said her daughter said my son was her boyfriend, but I had literally never heard this girl’s name before or since so I didn’t think much of it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877228 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 07:54:14 +0000 Anagram 2877228@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: OMG. That's so much for Kinder! This actually reminds me of something else we've experienced this year in K that I was totally not ready for--this "crush" business. How do you think the kids even know this stuff so young?!</p> <p>My DD has never, ever mentioned anything about that type of stuff, but recently at a birthday party, I had a parent approach me and joke that she was my DDs future mother-in-law because her son had "A big crush" on DD and all he does it talk about her, and he kept her christmas card and still has it on his bedside table so he can look at it every night.</p> <p>So if that isn't crazy enough, another mom at the party heard this exchange and said that HER daughter had been so upset lately because her daughter had a crush on that boy, but the boy liked DD. And Another boy apparently likes DD and the two boys were fighting to sit next to her at the party. </p> <p> I was pretty shocked, because.....DD doesn't talk like that at home. I'm pretty sure she doesn't know what a crush is, and we never, ever do that weird stuff where adults ask their kids who their boyfriend is, or accuse them of "liking" every opposite gender kid they play with. I'm actually pretty against all that hetero normative stuff, and also maybe I'm a prude because I think they are just too young for that kind of thing. But is it developmentally normal? I thought it was really bizarre, but a lot of the other parents were encouraging it.</p> <p>We've had quite a few class birthday parties this past month, and the "love triangle" is a big topic of conversation among the parents. They were all watching as the boys fought over who got to sit next to DD (and one of the boys cried, so his dad got another chair and put it on DDs other side). I was pretty squicked out and at home after the party, we just talked about including everyone and being friends with everyone. But one boy at the party tried to HOLD HER HAND and she kept pulling away (again, how do they know that's a thing? Well, I guess they see their parents do it, so maybe it's normal), but I also reiterated that she does not have to be nice if someone is touching her and she doesn't like it.</p> <p>Anyway. I was not prepared for any of this. Have you guys been seeing this stuff? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877225 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 07:46:42 +0000 Adira 2877225@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: OMG, how heartbreaking! :crying: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877222 Tue, 19 Mar 2019 07:36:08 +0000 erinbaderin 2877222@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: OMG, this broke my heart. Poor little thing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877202 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 22:54:00 +0000 Corduroy 2877202@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DD got sent to the principal's office today for putting food down a boy's shirt and then punching him in the face (or pretending to depending on the version). In her long story of what led up to this she explained that the girls in her class are no longer speaking to her because she told her best friend's crush that the friend liked him. DD thought she was helping and was devastated to find out she made it "worser". She told me this friend stop talking to her a while ago but I didn't realize crushes and boys were involved. DD sobbed so hard in my lap. I've never seen her so upset and I didn't know she was carrying so much around. She really thinks she's never going to have friends. Sigh. I don't think the friendship drama is going away anytime soon but I hope the (I presume pretend) punching does. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877137 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 15:45:58 +0000 PurplePeony 2877137@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: My take on the “role model” situation depends on whether there will be other “model” students or if she’s the only one. When I was a kid (but a little older than your DD), my teacher did something similar with me and it ended up creating a bad social dynamic with kids calling me teacher’s pet and such. I ended up feeling pretty isolated and upset with my teacher for singling me out. Based on that experience, I would only let my kid participate as a “model student” if there were maybe half a dozen kids filling that same role. I don’t disagree with the potential benefits other people have mentioned, but IMO those would be outweighed if she ends up being teased for being the good example. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877135 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 15:40:02 +0000 Corduroy 2877135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: I have no expertise in this area but I think I'd say an teacher/grown up is coming to lead groups in learning more about social skills and communicating with classmates. I think I would say I think DD has good social skills and I would hope she would be a good example but I don't think I'd say she's being brought in as the good example. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877133 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 15:32:36 +0000 Anagram 2877133@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Corduroy: asking her is a good idea. How would you phrase it in a way that makes sense for DD but also doesn’t draw attention to other kids? Like if she asks who else is going (I honestly don’t know) and of her friends are also doing it, if I say no or I’m not sure, she may not want to go. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/11#post-2877132 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 15:24:56 +0000 erinbaderin 2877132@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: I would do it - I think it sounds like a great opportunity for her to broaden her friend group, develop social skills, and encourage empathy and lessons in how people come in all different “shapes and sizes” which is basically what kindergarten is for. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877127 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 14:32:21 +0000 Corduroy 2877127@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: Is this a situation where you'd be comfortable asking DD if she wants to participate? I'm trying to do that more and more when I'm on the fence about something. I find DD often has a concern or interest I hadn't considered. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877115 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 13:32:49 +0000 Anagram 2877115@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: oh man, and then I just read this. I guess neurodiverse is already divisive in some circles. I did not know that. <a href="https://the-art-of-autism.com/neurodiverse-a-person-a-perspective-a-movement/" rel="nofollow">https://the-art-of-autism.com/neurodiverse-a-person-a-perspective-a-movement/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877114 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 13:30:19 +0000 Anagram 2877114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: I think, with the unfortunate way the world works, even if we all start saying "neurodiverse" today, then in 3 years the kids will catch on to what it means and within 5 years it will used as a slur or a taunt. And then we'll have a new term. :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877106 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 12:41:00 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2877106@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: She uses "neurodiverse" most frequently, though I realize that in her case it might be more applicable (she has kids with FASD, autism and anxiety) than the situation you're describing, where the kids may not be developmentally delayed because of an actual medical diagnosis, but just developing on a different time frame. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877090 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 11:35:02 +0000 Anagram 2877090@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: I feel like this kind of thing changes really often, so who knows what it will be in 1-2 years, you know? Special needs was created to replaced "retarded", which has a super negative connotation now but used to literally mean "delayed" developmentally. And then Special Needs became kind of a rude term and we migrated to typical/atypical. And now who knows what will be next. What does your friend suggest for someone who is developing outside of typical timelines or isn't developing at all? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877082 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 10:59:56 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2877082@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: Oh, interesting, thank you for that background. I have a friend who had 3 kids with special needs, and she's always saying on Facebook how she hates the term atypical, so I just assumed it was not a good one to use. I appreciate the education! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877065 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 09:52:10 +0000 Anagram 2877065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: That's the educational term du jour for kids who used to be labeled "special needs". I work in a middle school, and these are the terms we use in meetings, IEP/504 discussions, in our PLEPS (our written updates on the kids case files, etc). But I also put it in quotes because I can understand how some parents wouldn't like any term that means their child is abnormal. But I think that is why schools use typical, as in typically developing, and atypical.</p> <p><a href="https://www.thoughtco.com/typical-and-not-normal-3110879" rel="nofollow">https://www.thoughtco.com/typical-and-not-normal-3110879</a><br /> <a href="https://www.parents.com/health/special-needs-now/11-things-i-wish-my-friends-with-typical-kids-knew-about-raising-a-son-with/" rel="nofollow">https://www.parents.com/health/special-needs-now/11-things-i-wish-my-friends-with-typical-kids-knew-about-raising-a-son-with/</a><br /> <a href="http://motheringoutsidethelines.com/what-does-atypical-mean-plus-an-uplifting-message-to-moms-of-atypical-kids/" rel="nofollow">http://motheringoutsidethelines.com/what-does-atypical-mean-plus-an-uplifting-message-to-moms-of-atypical-kids/</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877056 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 09:08:57 +0000 Adira 2877056@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Carrot: Thanks for the update!! It sounds like this was probably a one-time occurrence, so hopefully you don't hear about any more issues. Ugh, the whole friendship thing at this age just breaks my heart... Xander has a friend that he plays with for 5-10 minutes after school every day, and the other day that friend was having a playdate with someone else, so he left with him right after school instead of playing with Xander and Xander was just so bummed... :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877054 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 08:57:40 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2877054@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Just to update on my note re: kiddo's progress report and her apparently getting physical with other kids. We met with her teacher on Friday, and basically it sounds like what happened is that a group of 3-4 girls, one of them my daughter, were in a disagreement about something, and ended up pushing each other in frustration. The teacher didn't see how it started, and said that everyone in the group was doing it, including my daughter. It apparently wasn't hard enough that anyone was hurt, and the teacher intervened after a few minutes of trying to let them resolve it themselves. She doesn't have any concerns about kiddo's behavior overall, and thinks this was situational. Interestingly, one of the girls involved is someone that my daughter keeps trying to get closer to but the girl is often a bit of a jerk to her so I wonder if that dynamic is showing up a bit too. The girls get on the bus together so my husband sees them interact in the morning and says that our kiddo is often trying to play and talk to her, but the other girl often ditches her for other kids, which I know our kiddo has definitely been upset about before. Either way we talked about using our hands vs using our words, etc., and I think she gets it, so we'll see how it goes. Girl friendships are making my head hurt already lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877052 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 08:55:39 +0000 HappyBaker 2877052@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: I would also definitely do it. My DD sounds similar to yours and I think it would help her to be around kids at different levels socially so she better understands things aren't as easy breezy for other kids as they can be for her sometimes, and how to deal with those situations and include everyone where they are at. I think she has a tendency to stick with kids that are similar to her, and while she isn't excluding other kids I think it can't hurt to be more exposed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877050 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 08:52:28 +0000 Mrs. Carrot 2877050@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: I would absolutely do it. I think role modeling behavior and being an example is just as important to a kid's development as being the "learner." And at this age, they're still learning empathy and understanding, so your DD would definitely get a lot of benefit out of being around kids who have different ways of approaching social situations. One thing I would just caution is not to categorize the other kids as "atypical" but as kids who are at different places in their learning and development. I don't think you're thinking of it that way, the term just popped out at me so figured I'd throw in my unsolicited 2 cents :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/entering-kindergarten-fall-2018-parents-chat/page/10#post-2877046 Mon, 18 Mar 2019 08:26:34 +0000 Anagram 2877046@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Totally random ? for you ladies with same age kids. We got a letter home from DDs school that said a PHd school psychology intern will be coming to the school from now-end of June and is forming "social skills circles" for the kiddos who are lagging behind on social skills. And DD was nominated by her teacher to join this group as someone that is a good example of social skills. We have to sign a permission slip if this is okay with us. It's a pull out program, and she'll be in this social skills group 2-3 times a week.</p> <p>My first inclination was to say yes. I do think DD sets a good example behaviorally and honestly, I've felt all year that her class was probably set up like this, with half the class needing 1:1 aides or heavy inclusion support, and the other half being really chill, easy-to-handle, more "typical" kids. Like I feel like they specifically chose that mix of kids. So this seems fine to me--DD is basically ahead in most of the academic areas, so the pullout part and missing some class doesn't bother me. She'd likely be missing circle time or free-choice centers.</p> <p>But DH is kind of against it. He hasn't fully decided, but he's wary of having DD miss class and get no benefit for herself. </p> <p>But I feel like it probably will benefit her to learn how to get along with atypical kids, right? Like these social "soft skills" are just as important to getting along in life as the hard skills. And plus, it's only missing K. It's not like missing 2-3 hours a week of calculus. And finally, I know from working in a middle school that the high achievers are the ones who miss class the most because they are overextended and are constantly missing class for student council, or special field trips because they are on some team, or National Honor Society--and they just have to make up their missed work and they pretty much always do. So it's something we have to get used to as parents, if DD ends up being that kind of kid--like, she'll learn to manage missing class as she gets older.</p> <p>Anyway, what are your thoughts? Would you sign the permission slip or no, and why? </p>