https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 16 Apr 2026 06:24:54 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768741 Sat, 19 Aug 2017 15:09:03 +0000 LemonJack 2768741@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I was talking about occasional babysitting. I would babysit for a day/night here or there, or sometimes a weekend, but not on a regular basis. I also would volunteer a lot because I love hanging out with my nieces and nephew, so my sister knew it was something I wanted to do.</p> <p>I think regular caregiving is something completely different. Your friend's brother sounds like he's taking advantage of her. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768709 Sat, 19 Aug 2017 10:55:04 +0000 meadow 2768709@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Sorry was off HB for a bit.....</p> <p>Yes I was asking for a one off babysitting time. If I had family watching my LOs on a regular basis it would be a completely different story.</p> <p>If I had a niece or something who was a teen or in college, I wouldn't think twice about paying her....but my SIL is 30 and her and BIL are doing just fine for themselves so I think handing them cash would be insulting.</p> <p>I appreciate all the good ideas on here - and I like seeing how many people pitch in for family :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768598 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 14:28:24 +0000 Eko 2768598@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I like the idea of having lunch there or something to make it easy on her. Other than that, I wouldn't do anything. It's family. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768571 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 13:26:56 +0000 alphagam84 2768571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: you don't normally pay family to babysit a child once in awhile. Maybe if it was a normal M-F gig like daycare but otherwise it's just being nice and enjoying time with a grandchild, niece/nephew, etc. My sister babysits a once or twice a month and would never accept money for it. She loves getting to watch Emma and asks to do it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768486 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 08:06:18 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2768486@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Ajsmommy: I agree this thread is one-off babysitting. Darn it, I thread jacked. But, I am curious because although my dad isn't a primary caregiver he is my primary back up so I don't have to take off from work. </p> <p>@looch: yeah, I think part of why I would rather pay my dad or anyone really is so that I don't owe them a favor. My dad's favor always involve manual labor since we are younger and have the muscle. Lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768481 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 07:57:54 +0000 Ajsmommy 2768481@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I am, that is what the post seemed to address. A one time weekend baby sitting gig. I wouldn't offer to pay unless as I stated it was a teen relative or a relative who needed $$. My mom, MIL, FIL, SIL's do this for us all the time and we never pay them. </p> <p>Now if you're talking m-f 8-5 then heck yeah you pay them, but that is not what this post was about.. unless I'm way of base. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768479 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 07:57:33 +0000 looch 2768479@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: This isn't exactly the same, but no one in my family (and in this I am including long time family friends) would accept money for babysitting my son because everyone has their own separate income and in our culture, it's the concept of extended village that kicks in.</p> <p>If it were the case that say, my brother were watching my son full time and couldn't have another job, I would insist on paying him and he'd accept, as I would if the situation were reversed. One off babysitting, like a weekend afternoon, is a different thing in my mind and unless that person is in dire straits, wouldn't want to be paid.</p> <p>Additionally, my parents in particular, are retired and do take care of my son but they would never accept any money to do so. As far as they are concerned, they do it so that we don't have to spend the money on paying other people. </p> <p>I also couldn't imagine forking over $50 to a friend of mine to watch my son, and I wouldn't accept it if money were offered to me.</p> <p>I don't think there is a right or wrong answer, but I do notice differences in the ways that people approach child care. I can totally see the idea of paying someone so that you're not obligated to reciprocate in kind. It's kind of like, you watched my kid, here's $50, we're even. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768472 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 07:44:42 +0000 Alba4 2768472@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wine? Gift card? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768469 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 07:41:35 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2768469@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For those that don't pay are you just talking about occasional babysitting? </p> <p>One of good friends was practically nannying for her brother and he got upset when she asked for compensation. While she was watching his children she could not go to school or have a daytime job. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768464 Fri, 18 Aug 2017 07:15:24 +0000 Ajsmommy 2768464@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>A heartfelt thank you. But again I guess it depends on family dynamics. I honestly can't imagine paying a relative to babysit my kids unless it was a teen relative (which we don't have) or maybe if I knew they were in a rough spot or something. My mom, my MIL, FIL and SIL's have all watched our kids and we've never paid them. Most of the time they actually thank us LOL </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768407 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 17:38:35 +0000 mrs.kiwi 2768407@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I babysat for my sil/bil's kids many a times especially before having kids. They usually had food for us and that's it. Sometimes they would bring home a special treat. But since they're a good amount older they would treat us to lunch/dinner here and there so I wouldn't have expected anything else. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768402 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 17:08:56 +0000 LemonJack 2768402@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with @Meowkers in that it depends on family dynamics. In my family we don't pay. I watched my sister's kids a lot when they were younger, and was never paid (and never expected to be). </p> <p>If anything I might just make some cookies for them. </p> <p>Enjoy the wedding! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768385 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 14:47:41 +0000 Meowkers 2768385@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I guess it depends on family dynamics but my family members would be so insulted if I offered to pay them for watching my daughter. When family babysits I just make sure they have food, snacks, drinks, and the wifi password. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768365 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 13:35:57 +0000 PinkElephant 2768365@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@meadow: If you want to give something (like a gift card to a restaurant or a store she likes) and think maybe she won't accept, I'd suggest mailing it to her with a thank you card - that way she can't just hand it back to you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768363 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 13:34:23 +0000 ElbieKay 2768363@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In that situation, if it's an afternoon wedding, I would probably ask if they want to stay and visit over dinner. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768354 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 13:22:10 +0000 Rocker2014 2768354@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I always give my SILs a bottle of wine when they babysit for us :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768335 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 12:48:33 +0000 HeartAbandoned 2768335@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL keeps our son 1 day/week, and this summer my aunt has done the same. They both refuse a regular payment, but we try to do a gift after each "season" - usually a small token and a gift card to some place they would like. Last summer one of my BFFs kept DS several times, and she refused to let us pay her. At the end of the summer we gave her a J.Crew gift card &amp; told her to go back-to-school shopping with it (she's a teacher). </p> <p>I agree with PPs to make the house friendly for her with wifi, snacks, and everything she needs to keep the kiddos happy. And maybe if there is a good favor at the wedding, snag an extra for her! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768331 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 12:39:13 +0000 codeitall 2768331@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My brother hates cooking and isn't great at eating anything other than cereal, so every time he comes to watch DS or DD, we load him up on good food and tons of leftovers and treats to take home. He doesn't have any interest in money, so that's how we do it. He usually loves (and quickly demolishes) the cookies, banana/zucchini bread or brownies we give him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768320 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 12:05:20 +0000 meadow 2768320@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamaof2: I'm pretty sure she'd be insulted.</p> <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Sweet tooth - good idea - I'll make sure to have some special chocolate, or cookies, or brownies for them too.</p> <p>@looch: TV is all password free - but smart to leave the password for the wifi in case she brings her work laptop (her cell is already connected). Yes - I figured we would leave the stroller ready to go.</p> <p>@BadgerMom: Duh - restaurant giftcard! Thanks!!!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768317 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 11:54:16 +0000 BadgerMom 2768317@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would make sure they have food, snacks, wifi password, stroller, like pp suggested. And if you want to do something "extra." I'd probably give them a thank you card with a restaurant gift certificate and say dinner is on you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768316 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 11:47:12 +0000 looch 2768316@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you think they might want to watch a movie or something while the kids are taking their nap? If so and you have a smart tv that requires Netflix with a password, write it down for them. Or tell them to bring their own laptop and give them the wireless info.</p> <p>Beverages, I am always thirsty for something and it's nice to have a choice of a few things.</p> <p>If there is a chance they might go for a walk, leave the stroller set up in the garage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768315 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 11:45:01 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2768315@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dad sits for us sometimes and I always make sure he has lunch or dinner he can warm up. He also has a sweet tooth, so I bring home a SB brownie from time to time. </p> <p>ETA: I pay my dad sometimes. I used to do it every occasion he sat for us, but he finally pushed money out of my hands saying "this is what grands do." Now, I offer every once in awhile for "gas money." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768314 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 11:44:30 +0000 Mamaof2 2768314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@meadow: why wouldn't you pay her? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/family-member-as-a-baby-sitter#post-2768313 Thu, 17 Aug 2017 11:41:44 +0000 meadow 2768313@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My SIL is going to watch our twins in September (they will be about 15 months) while DH and I attend a daytime wedding. SIL would arrive about 10:30 so we could get to the 11am ceremony. They will put the kids down for a nap around noon. This will be her first time watching the kids without us there. (I assume she is bringing her husband with her of course.)</p> <p>I wouldn't pay her like a teenage babysitter but want to do something.....</p> <p>I figure that I can get subs or something to leave in the fridge for them to have for lunch. What else is appropriate? </p>