https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 28 Apr 2026 05:32:53 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660921 Sat, 03 Dec 2016 03:09:00 +0000 red_seattle 2660921@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Count this as another vote for the cold turkey detox method. </p> <p>As for the car seat, have you considered the Love &amp; Logic approach? Choices + consequences, but no battles? "oh, you don't want to be in your car seat? that's ok, it's no big deal to me. You can stay here. But I'm going on an adventure. sure would be fun to have you along, but I'll survive if you choose not to." It's an imperfect method, but sometimes they fight you because they can and they want to assert their independence. So if you diffuse things, and stop fighting them about it, eventually they stop fighting you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660918 Sat, 03 Dec 2016 00:38:16 +0000 JennyD 2660918@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you tried reverse psychology? Like "you probably can't get in that car seat by yourself like super fast. Naw. You're just two." That still works on my LO. Also, giving my LO more responsibility works well. Like telling her it's her job to get into her car seat and put her straps on. It's a big job she can help me with and she's such a great help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660498 Fri, 02 Dec 2016 06:16:45 +0000 hellobeeboston 2660498@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree with @T.H.O.U.: </p> <p>We found that the iPad was becoming an issue for our 3yo and his (and our allowal) use of it was too much. So we quit cold turkey (still allowed tv)... it was hard and he constantly asked for it for like 2 weeks, then less &amp; less. It's been about 2/3 months and we've let him have it here and there, maybe 5 times in 3 months, and it's much better!! Tv we just say he can do one or two shows or 1 movie and he's fine... he's four now though so a little easier to reason with! Good luck! A reset should help! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660478 Fri, 02 Dec 2016 01:01:54 +0000 bees_knees 2660478@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you read anything about RIE by Janet Lansbury? Her book "No Bad Kids" is great. She also has a blog. It sounds totally out there, but my DS (2.5) responds REALLY well to RIE methods. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660288 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 17:12:58 +0000 littlejoy 2660288@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I, too, have a strong-willed child. Listening to Janet Lansbury's podcast (and audiobooks) have been life changing. </p> <p>We also just started reading How to Talk so Kids ..., and I find it so helpful. I hope you find some tools that help! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660280 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 16:59:03 +0000 Miss Flamingo 2660280@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just had to do a sweet detox after the long Thanksgiving weekend because of the tantrums surrounding them. It took a few days but I feel like it really helped. She hasn't asked for any today. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660278 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 16:53:26 +0000 iluvboba637 2660278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 3.5 y/o DS is very hard headed too. And yes I feel like I am always saying turn off the tv or the iPad. But sadly we do rely on it for a few minutes in the morning and evening when prepping dinner. </p> <p>I use my iPhone timer A LOT and I feel that it helps SO much when I say last minute of tv and set the timer. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660274 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 16:42:21 +0000 oskarsmommy 2660274@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@My Only Sunshine: ha! I'm listenenin to that right now at work! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660266 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 16:22:14 +0000 My Only Sunshine 2660266@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 3.5 year old is difficult. I feel like I've read a thousand books. The one that has been the most helpful is "How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk." The best thing about it is it has sample "scripts," which I find to be helpful in thinking through how a conversation would actually play out. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660217 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 15:16:35 +0000 Maysprout 2660217@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Once fits start happening around shows I just say no more tv for a few days - they escalate too much. </p> <p>As for treats they're after a meal. They can throw a fit, it's annoying but it's not going to change the rules, and some of it is that they have to throw the fit to realize it's not going to change things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660140 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 14:15:33 +0000 MOMTOLITTLEB 2660140@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This makes me feel a little more normal. My little boy is 3 today and he gives us such a hard time, like we'd be worried about his hearing if we didn't know better, just completely ignores us. He will skip dinner and expect treats and shows all night. We try to be strict but my husband works so much that he's often not fully engaged at that time of the evening and I haven't been feeling well. Turning off the tv and sticking with it does help sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660114 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 13:55:28 +0000 2PeasinaPod 2660114@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I also agree with a detox on both cold turkey. It will be a hard few days, but you'll slowly start to see your LO come back! Have other things lined up in the meantime...puzzles to do or activity books...blocks to play with, books to read. As for the sweets, having them out of the house helps. You'll get a ton of tantrums at first, but we only use them right now as a reward for doing something extraordinary. </p> <p>And, the carseat. Blah...it's the bane of my existence! At 2.5, it was the absolute worst time for LO and his carseat. He plain didn't want to get in it ever. So it was always a wrestling match. But try not to give into the sweets. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660109 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 13:50:34 +0000 Anagram 2660109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oskarsmommy: I agree with trying a TV detox. And maybe a sweets detox, too! Just go cold turkey. Unplug the tv during LOs waking hours so he can see it doesn't work, and don't have any junk in house so you can show him and say, "no more". It might be 1-2 hard days but then it should improve.</p> <p>Also, it's just a frustrating age. We all feel like we are failing sometimes. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660105 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 13:46:53 +0000 Foodnerd81 2660105@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We've been going through that phase for a while now. We had to do a tv detox and especially cut out the YouTube entirely. I have been able to phase back regular tv (she only wants to watch Daniel tiger still) but she just cannot watch YouTube unless it's a really special occasion or emergency. She just cannot handle it when I turn it off. </p> <p>But yeah I could tell you lots of things that don't work. Screaming, stopping my feet, threats... I've already told my almost 3.5 year old that Christmas might be cancelled if she doesn't listen. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660013 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 12:27:21 +0000 Canoli 2660013@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oskarsmommy: I can tell you that we are doing a lot of things that don't work. Bribery is one. He is crazy for YouTube videos on the iPad which helps to distract sometimes but also backfires on us a lot. Like everyday when we have to leave the house. I also think for my son he is the middle child and while he loves his baby brother he is also jealous of the attention. We have 3 kids so unfortunately there is more of them than us and it is hard to give him the 1:1 undivided attention that sometimes he is seeking. I know it is such a tough age where they are going through so much but can not verbalize it all. I know not helpful advice but know that you are not alone and this too shall pass! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660005 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 12:19:00 +0000 oskarsmommy 2660005@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Canoli: thank you - that helps to know I'm not alone! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2660000 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 12:15:36 +0000 Canoli 2660000@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Following and wish I had advice. I have a 2.5 year old and it feels like everyday starts with a tantrum! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2659999 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 12:13:39 +0000 oskarsmommy 2659999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: good idea! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2659990 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 12:08:00 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2659990@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Have you tried like a tv detox? Go a week or two with no tv. Sometime it resets them so they don't ask for it all the time </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feel-like-im-failing-25-almost-3-year-old#post-2659982 Thu, 01 Dec 2016 12:01:58 +0000 oskarsmommy 2659982@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like all I do when I am with my son is field him from his vices. ALL he wants to do is watch TV, or eat sweets. It seems that all my time spent with him is in trying to keep those two things from happening, or to keep them to a minimum. </p> <p>He is also VERY hard headed. He loves do the exact opposite of what I ask of him (i.e. getting him to get in his carseat is now done by either threats that oncoming traffic will get us, or with a promise for a treat when he does)</p> <p>I've tried 123 magic, and it worked so-so - but it isn't really sticking anymore. Santa's watching you worked for a week, but now he literally couldn't care less about Santa and the possibility of coals in his stocking..</p> <p>Any tips? books I can read? words of wisdom? </p>