https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Tue, 28 Apr 2026 20:04:58 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2907504 Fri, 03 Jan 2020 14:39:03 +0000 MoonMoon 2907504@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lindseykaye: hugs. I'm glad you were able to let some stuff go and prioritize what was most meaningful for you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2907501 Fri, 03 Jan 2020 14:28:58 +0000 lindseykaye 2907501@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just popping back in here to say thanks. This community is just wonderful and I appreciate you all!</p> <p>I gave myself a lot of grace, prioritized some things that were really important to me over the holiday week (like making the 1-year photo books for our moms), let a lot go, and didn't work over the entire week I was on PTO. </p> <p>There was still a lot of sadness, and I got really upset when I spent a couple of hours making a New Year's card only to receive it without any photos printed on it (but I got a refund). But yeah, all in all I think I was just really really down about a lot of things at once when I made my post and getting it out there vs. letting it sit quietly eating at me made a big difference in itself. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2906857 Mon, 23 Dec 2019 17:21:38 +0000 MoonMoon 2906857@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Hugs to you, you seem exhausted and rightfully so with work, family, and your mom's illness all piling up. You need to give yourself some recognition for how much you are doing, and all the balls you're keeping in the air. Sometimes my husband and I ask each other "permission" to not do something, and just saying it out loud helps take the pressure off. Just know that nobody is judging you as hard as you judge yourself. Ask yourself if a friend were going through what you're going through, would you think she's not doing "enough"? And give yourself that same love and flexibility. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2906613 Fri, 20 Dec 2019 12:48:43 +0000 ilovepie 2906613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DH's brother had cancer last Christmas and the whole season was just rough. We couldn't see or help anyone because we were sick the whole time. Luckily I don't think the kids remember. It's hard! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2906598 Fri, 20 Dec 2019 11:57:01 +0000 bhbee 2906598@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Big big hugs :heart: you are not alone in feeling this way sometimes! It’s just so hard to feel good about anything with that diagnosis hanging over you all. I think dh felt pretty much constant guilt and emotional exhaustion this summer when his mom was sick, and he doesn’t even have all the varied pressures women put on themselves. I agree focus might help - maybe the one thing that means the most to you over the holidays? That you’ll enjoy looking at pictures of in a future year? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2906596 Fri, 20 Dec 2019 11:42:34 +0000 graceandjoy 2906596@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh girl you are just so overwhelmed! I am sure with your mom's diagnose and not being able to see her this holiday gets you really down and it just spirals from there. Maybe instead of freaking out over EVERYTHING that's going on, pick one area to focus on so that you can feel good about it? Sending you so much :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2906593 Fri, 20 Dec 2019 11:20:14 +0000 crazydoglady 2906593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lindseykaye: I saw your original post as well and I think so much of your feeling like you aren't doing "enough" boils down to your mom. I'm so sorry. I was absolutely blind sighted when my mom was diagnosed with cancer but I also live very close to her, so it was easy to be there physically.<br /> Please don't worry about Christmas, about making it special, of living up to perceived expectations, it is wasted energy.<br /> Instead focus on your mom. Even if it's slipping a note in the mail, sending her a text with a pic of the kids. You won't regret putting energy here.<br /> Hugs. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/feeling-down-about-not-doing-enough-this-holiday-season#post-2906592 Fri, 20 Dec 2019 11:16:52 +0000 lindseykaye 2906592@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just wrote this whole big long post and deleted it.</p> <p>Basically I am feeling really down and like I am not doing "enough" this holiday season even though I know in my logical brain that I am doing WAY MORE than enough and that no one in my life would ever think this of me. It's totally an internal criticism/anxiety/depression funk and I am not sure how to shake it.</p> <p>Thinking about everything I have been and am doing just seems to make me more anxious. Like, with all that I do, there are still things I should be doing "better" or "more" and if that's the case, how will I ever feel adequate?</p> <p>I am working a TON right now, including about 20-25% travel for a week at a time. And I feel like I am especially dropping the ball with my mom, who was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago and who I will not see over the holidays. And I have let so few balls get dropped, but I can't help but keep feeling like I have - or will soon.</p> <p>What do you do when you feel this way? Do other people feel this way even or do I just have these wildly unrealistic expectations of myself? Sigh. I am just so tired. </p>