https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 06 May 2026 11:03:22 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869763 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 16:35:52 +0000 poppygirl15 2869763@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Haven't read all of the responses, but I wouldn't worry about it. For 99% of the parties we attend, gifts aren't opened at the party anyhow. They are taken home and opened there. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869727 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 14:41:48 +0000 DesertDreams88 2869727@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bhbee: @lamariniere: @Adira: @hellobeeboston: @Kaohinani: @Mrs. Lemon-Lime: @Anagram: @wrkbrk: @peachykeen: @Mrsbells: </p> <p>Thanks all for your feedback! I think the root of this is I feel really weird specifying no gifts like as if it's a firm rule. I think it should be up to the party attendee and I wouldn't be offended either way. From personal experience, I always bring a gift because I just like giving gifts. I try to go for open-ended, consumable, experiential, books, and/or tailored to specific interests of the child.</p> <p>Luckily all of the people invited are mainly our adult friends who just happen to have kids 10 and under. So it's not like random daycare moms I don't know very well. </p> <p>Based on this, we won't open gifts at the party and if anyone mentions it I'll just say I want to maximize bounce house time. I always take pics/video of gift-opening and send them with a thank you to various relatives, so I can definitely do that later for any gift givers. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869694 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 12:50:03 +0000 peachykeen 2869694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We've also been kind of surprised by how few "no gifts" we've been invited to, but I haven't felt awkward not bringing a gift because I know we wouldn't have requested 'no gifts' unless we really didn't want them. I actually feel more annoyed at the people who do bring gifts, but I know some of them simply miss the note on the invite. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869693 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 12:48:26 +0000 peachykeen 2869693@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We have been pretty explicit saying "please no gifts" on invites for both of my older daughter's parties (her 1st and 4th birthdays are the only ones we've had parties) and a few people still brought a gift. I'd say between 5-20%. We just set them on a chair/bench on the far side of the cake table and didn't open them until everyone had left/after we got home. We wrote thank you notes to the ones who had brought gifts. It's a little awkward, but what can you do beyond saying "no gifts"? I'd prefer zero gifts, but 5-6 gifts is still better than 20! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869680 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 11:47:14 +0000 Mrsbells 2869680@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@DesertDreams88: I think you did create an awkward situation here. As a parent I would feel awkward if I arrived without a gift and saw some people had gifts. I would feel even worse if a parent mentioned you had told them specific things your child likes and that happens because parents talk to each other </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869637 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 09:23:07 +0000 wrkbrk 2869637@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kaohinani: Yeah like a foil one? Paw Patrol or some happy bday one or sometimes the big gold number of the age the kid is! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869628 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 08:48:38 +0000 Anagram 2869628@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@DesertDreams88: yes, say no gifts and then whisk any brought gifts away to a hidden spot.</p> <p>I have been to several no gifts party where some people brought gifts and then made the rest of us who didn't bring gifts feel super awkward. Even if the gifts are from close family, they should be put away somewhere and not staged on a gifts table or anywhere visible during the party. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869616 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 08:17:53 +0000 Kaohinani 2869616@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wrkbrk: A balloon ... as in a mylar balloon? 🎈 What an adorable idea and a spectacular way to both circumvent and honor a "no gifting" policy while still making the party boy or girl feel special! I love it! 💙👍 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869613 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 08:15:12 +0000 wrkbrk 2869613@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Another thing that happened recently was, we were invited to a bday party about six weeks ago for this weekend. A few days ago the host sent a reminder and IT said no gifts. But the invite didn’t. So of course we already got one.... 🤷🏼‍♀️ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869612 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 08:13:13 +0000 wrkbrk 2869612@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nah. Some always bring gifts even when it says no gifts on the invite. Always. Promise. Do NOT open at the party. That’s not a thing here, and there’s no expectation of it. Saves a lot of headache. Simply send a TY note for the gifts you open at home after the party and move on.<br /> FWIW, when parties are no gift I bring a birthday balloon. So it’s something for the kiddo, but easily trashed 😂 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869611 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 08:06:20 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2869611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, I think you may have fumbled the “no gifts” thing a bit here. That’s okay. Depending on how much more time is left between now and party you can send a reminder that includes pertinent info like directions and re-emphasize no gifts, but leave out the “necessary” because that sounds like a choice whereas you are making a request. When it comes to the actual party designate you, your husband, and whoever friend/ family that is really helpful to know where to put gifts where they are not “on display” and open them after the party. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869601 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 06:51:21 +0000 Kaohinani 2869601@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@DesertDreams88: Hi, DesertDreams!<br /> What a conundrum. 🤔<br /> I believe your wording is what unintentionally led to some confusion. "No gifts necessary ..." indicates that attendees should not feel obligated to provide gifts as they are not expected nor required for attendance; however, "No gifts ..." OR "We are not accepting gifts for this celebration..." would indicate that you do not want or need attendees to bring items AT ALL. Many people are extremely literal and would need black/white direction as stating "neccessary" indicates the vague grey area of "Should I bring a gift because it is proper (or I wish to) OR not as it is not assumed?"<br /> In order to deal with unexpected gifts - graciously accept (you may wish to state they "Didnt have to,"), place gifts in an area that is not within eye shot of the children OR other attendees, and then have DS and DD open them after the party (or the next day when some of the excitement has died down.). The kids could always write/draw thank yous at a later time. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869599 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 06:16:20 +0000 hellobeeboston 2869599@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would definitely NOT open gifts at the party. Especially since you said no gifts. Even the parties we have had with gifts, we wait to open at home. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869597 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 06:11:20 +0000 Adira 2869597@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do NOT open gifts at the party if you specified no gifts. The people who followed your direction will be miffed! And despite you saying no gifts, some people are going to bring gifts anyway, not just the two people you spoke to about it, so don't worry about having made it awkward.</p> <p>When we had Xander's party, we specified no gifts, and probably at least 4-5 people brought gifts anyway. We just hid them and opened them at home and then sent thank yous to those people after. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869590 Wed, 30 Jan 2019 00:08:35 +0000 lamariniere 2869590@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@bhbee: agree. If you said no gifts, I wouldn’t open any at the party. Just thank everyone later. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869589 Tue, 29 Jan 2019 23:48:26 +0000 bhbee 2869589@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In my experience,</p> <p>1) that situation exists likely whether you did anything or not, it’s just part of saying no gifts, some will always bring them<br /> 2) definitely don’t open if you said no gifts. At our last no gifts party I put anything brought under a table. Just do the usual thank you acknowledgements later. If you think they would enjoy seeing it opened send pics/video. Near us it is very uncommon to open gifts at parties, unlike when I grew up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/first-party-said-no-gifts-some-are-bringing-gifts#post-2869584 Tue, 29 Jan 2019 23:07:16 +0000 DesertDreams88 2869584@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS is turning 3 and DD is turning 1 so we are having a combo bday. First friend party ever. 19 kids are coming and 17 adults. I originally didn't mention anything about gifts on the Facebook event when I sent it out mid-December because I was unsure; but then on Dec 27 I updated the event description to say "No gifts necessary, the kids have all the toys they need." I'm not ardently opposed to gifts but I just felt like, ehhh. Inviting friends to little kid bday parties is a bit uncommon in my circle, they're usually more family parties... but I just wanted to celebrate and have a good time.</p> <p>2 of my friends aren't on FB so I invited them by word of mouth and they asked me last week about what to buy. To one of them I said oh gifts aren't necessary but if you really want to, DS just broke his bubble machine and recorder and he loved those. To my other friend, she just asked what does DS like and I replied trucks, cars, dinos, and then she asked about DD and I realized she was asking more about gifts and I said oh but you don't have to...... but books are always good?</p> <p>So anyways, basically,<br /> 1) Did I make this an awkward situation where some friends will bring gifts and some won't and various people might be a bit miffed?<br /> 2) Do we open up presents at the party? It's at a bounce house place for 2 hours and I only planned on about 15 minutes of singing and cake eating. </p>