https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 09 May 2026 13:01:21 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving/page/2#post-1242331 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 15:48:44 +0000 MrsH 1242331@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: personally I thinking is disrespectful to accommodate one person and not another. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving/page/2#post-1241838 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 13:40:37 +0000 Dandelion 1241838@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: I hope it works our for you! If your MIL says something, have your DH ready to speak up in your defense, saying that you have to bring something so you don't end up at the hospital, with an allergic reaction...especially when pregnant! I'm sorry she's not more aware of your health concerns. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving/page/2#post-1241816 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 13:35:35 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1241816@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: my thoughts exactly. My ILs thanksgiving menu looks like yours. We have to bring so much food with us; it would have been easier for us to host!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving/page/2#post-1241812 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 13:34:47 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1241812@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: ahh I'm the jerk who asked to ask to hve something heated up.. My ILs live an hour away and never serve dinner on time. Maybe an hour or two after they said dinner would start.. So I have to bring my own food, fully cooked &amp; ready to be served, but then it ends up thrown in their fridge for awhile so it doesn't spoil. </p> <p>If dinner actually started on time, I wouldn't have to ask! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving/page/2#post-1241767 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 13:25:47 +0000 spaniellove 1241767@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You know, I was thinking this morning and wondering why on earth everyone is bringing a dish to cater solely to SIL's needs when she isn't cooking anything (her husband is making their contribution as always), yet if I want to eat I have to make or bring my entire meal. I mean, I'll do what I have to do to not starve (I'll bring fast food if I have to) but something about that just doesn't make sense. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1241747 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 13:19:52 +0000 cascademom 1241747@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Jump Rope: I'm kind of convinced that people just aren't sensitive to those needs versus others. Considering how prevalent peanut allergies are for children, you would think that more consideration would be taken. It's always been a struggle growing up with allergies for people to get it. Inlaws are just worse about it for me. Nothing like roasting peanuts in the house when I was there. Thanks for making me feel totally left out in that situation. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1240414 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 02:57:49 +0000 Sapphiresun 1240414@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds like you've figured it out, but that sucks that they don't accommodate for you.</p> <p>Last year I single handedly made full thanksgiving dinner for a 20 person crowd that included a celiac, gluten free by choice, 2 people on Atkins induction, a lactose intolerant, one who doesn't do spices, a vegetarian, a vegan, a diabetic and a pregnant person, and managed to accommodate everybody's dietary needs well enough that nobody went hungry. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1240395 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 01:48:39 +0000 erwoo 1240395@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds like talking to her wouldn't be an option? I would just eat something before you head over and eat what you know is safe to eat just so they won't say anything about why you're not eating at all. I'm sorry you have to go through this... Food allergies are pretty serious stuff so I'm surprised that your MIL isn't more sensitive about it, especially when her own daughter has a food allergy. :\ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1240362 Mon, 25 Nov 2013 00:41:01 +0000 googly-eyes 1240362@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: ah I never thought of it as making more work for the host(ess) but then again I think where I'm from nobody puts too much effort into the look of things. All good points, I never thought about the proportions either. Eta thanks for the explanation!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239999 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 19:19:23 +0000 spaniellove 1239999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's been decided, I love stuffing so am bringing that and a GF apple crisp because I suspect MIL plans to serve previously frozen cupcakes. The tail end of Thanksgiving dinner is always DH's birthday party so I can use the excuse that he gets to choose the dessert he wants to eat! He also insists on fresh cranberry sauce so I think we're also bringing that. I'll have all the things I love! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239884 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 17:39:16 +0000 Mrs.Someone 1239884@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree that guests shouldn't make more work for the host, but I feel that family (parents, ILs, and siblings) should be willing to accommodate. If they aren't then you should bring your own food even if they say not to, they should care about you not getting sick, especially when carrying their grandchild... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239823 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 17:04:59 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 1239823@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: exactly guests shouldn't create more work for the host. That's why I am also big on bringing flowers in a vase ready to place on a surface. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239795 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 16:48:12 +0000 Penny Lane 1239795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>just do it, bring a side dish or two that you can eat. you don't need an excuse, especially when you're doing it in order to have something you can eat without reacting!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239793 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 16:47:32 +0000 T.H.O.U. 1239793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: I agree if an extra fish is brought it should be fully prepared (no saying can I use the oven to heat this up) and already in a serving dish with utensils! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239787 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 16:44:49 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 1239787@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@googly-eyes: Of course no argument :happy: I was upset about it for several reasons. First, she didn't reach out to me to find out what she could bring to enhance my carefully planned and thoughout menu. Second, her proportions were not at all the size of what I made for the sides. Third, she brought it in a sauce pan and I didn't have a nice serving dish or extra serving utensils to accomodate the unexpected dish. Second and Third are important to me because I like my table and buffet to look a certain way. Fourth, her food doesn't taste good. Fifth, I am in the camp that unsolicited food and drink a guest may bring is at the discretion of the host to serve because it's a gift. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239780 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 16:41:28 +0000 T.H.O.U. 1239780@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: just do it and don't ask again. Usually people say no, just bring the one dish so the guests aren't burdened but in this case it's probably less of a burden to bring your own food rather then go hungry or get sick. If that's all she's planning then I would even consider also bringing a dessert or something too! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239769 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 16:34:00 +0000 Cole 1239769@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wonder if you could say you won a raffle at the grocery store or something and bring along a few dishes. Perhaps it would help smooth over the fact that she vetoed you bringing more food. I guess the only upshot of their being such a small amount of choices is it will make it easier for you to eat...</p> <p>Allergies are no joke, my husband has many and it is so tricky. People seem willing to accommodate one or two things but once the list is long they seem to just give up :sad: -- not that I don't understand, it is overwhelming but it makes big gatherings hard for him. We wind up bringing lots of dishes and just playing it off that I like to cook. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239720 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 15:53:49 +0000 googly-eyes 1239720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: perhaps it's a cultural thing but why did that bother you? Why not serve it and say mil made it? Not trying to spark an argument. I come from a background where people bring stuff unexpectedly (including people!) often so like I said its just outside my way of thinking. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239718 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 15:50:56 +0000 googly-eyes 1239718@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with those who said to play the pregnancy card! And/or bring more food. Don't eat and suffer! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239588 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 14:16:45 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 1239588@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: even if there was a lot of each food item her current menu is very minimal. In this one case I would bring another dish and ignore the host- the other guests will likely appreciate the variety.. I know for me I was less than pleased when my MIL brought a dish without asking first hence I didn't serve it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239570 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 14:09:23 +0000 spaniellove 1239570@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lemon-Lime: Your point about asking her permission reminds me that I've asked several times if we should/could bring another dish, actually, and she's said no. Do you think it would be awkward or rude to do it anyway? Aside from the allergy issue I'm not sure how 11 adults are going to split 1 turkey and 2 sides. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239566 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 14:07:41 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1239566@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I agree with everyone else, do not give yourself an allergic reaction. We have a bunch of dietary restrictions here and whenever I go to someone's house I plan on not eating anything besides what I brought. If there's something else I can have I see it as a happy bonus. It's not fun but getting myself or the LOs sick is worse. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239504 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 13:17:15 +0000 JerricaBenton 1239504@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a similar issue when I eat at the IL's. Usually I just eat the one thing I brought and no one really notices. It sucks when it's a holiday like Thanksgiving, that you want to be able to enjoy the food too! I would bring a few extra things that you know you can eat, and then make yourself a feast of all your favorite things to eat over the weekend! Last Thanksgiving with the ILs, I pretty much ate nothing and it sucked. But then when we got home I just made a whole Thanksgiving dinner and all was right with the world again :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239474 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 12:57:54 +0000 MrsH 1239474@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@spaniellove: the fact that it would be easy to not stuff the bird is what made my DH finally understand that it was down right disrespectful of them to cook in a way that excludes me. Since then it has gotten moderately better but I still feel your pain. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239447 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 12:47:45 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 1239447@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely don't eat her food if it makes you ill. I would bring another another filling side dish the entire family can eat (with her permission of course) and that way you will have TWO items to eat. Or bring your own alternative meal and let them be weird. As much as modifying a recipe is annoying (and does change the taste) I gladly do it so a guess can eat everything. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239430 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 12:31:14 +0000 spaniellove 1239430@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Uh, so DH called to ask what she's making. OMG we'll have to bring our own food. There are 11 people and she's only planning to have a turkey, our mashed potatoes, and someone else's stuffing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239419 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 12:21:21 +0000 Mrs.Someone 1239419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Definitely don't suffer, especially because you're pregnant! I like the idea of bringing a few other things that you can eat. That is my plan for our 2nd thanksgiving this year, though my allergies are less of a problem (and my friends are more accommodating). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239405 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 12:04:45 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1239405@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm really bummed that others don't accommodate food requirements and preferences. My family makes a TON of food so everyone can eat and enjoy together. I'm a veggie &amp; my cousin has a severe peanut allergy, and no one blinks an eye to make sure we are full and satisfied. I'm the same way when I host. </p> <p>I've never had a meal at my inlaws house. They don't care. I used to chalk it up to not understanding but now it's a blatant disregard for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239375 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 11:25:18 +0000 cascademom 1239375@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bring other dishes. I have a bad nut allergy. I try to make sure that no nuts are added to stuff. We'll see how the inlaws do it on Christmas. Even at work, we had a big team meeting. Person in charge of catering never asked about food allergies and got a lot of stuff with nuts on it. So, I ate about half of what was offered. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/food-allergies-what-to-do-about-thanksgiving#post-1239343 Sun, 24 Nov 2013 10:45:34 +0000 Andrea 1239343@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Don't suffer! Bring a few side dishes that you can eat and fake eat her food if need be! Take a small amount and hide some in your napkin. I've done that before when the food wasn't good .... </p>