Hellobee Boards Topic: For those who are "three or four or open to more"

Hellobee Boards Topic: For those who are "three or four or open to more" https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 01 Jul 2026 06:11:36 +0000 jedeve on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1437388 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 15:26:46 +0000 jedeve 1437388@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Beyond2: it's funny because I know a lot of people consider things like vacations and paying for college when deciding to have more kids or not. And then I feel guilty because what if we can't afford all of college for three kids? But at the end of the day I tell myself I most likely wouldn't regret having the third even if it means fewer vacations. I am not a HUGE baby person or anything. The idea of two under two is terrifying and honestly three seems exhausting. But she. I think of the type of family I ultimately want, I think of three or more. I guess I started this thread because I feel like the other threads where people want one or two they have very legitimate reasons for doing so. But I don't feel like I have great reasons for wanting three besides just wanting three! I guess that's really what anyone's reasons come down to. And who knows. Sometimes you end up with more, sometimes less. We will see. mrs.shinerbock on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436385 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 12:03:52 +0000 mrs.shinerbock 1436385@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I am #3 of 4, but my brother and one sister are much older than me and only my older sister lived with my younger sister and I (for five years) I did not really get along with my younger sister when we were younger, but now that we are adults, I am pretty close to both my sisters and I absolutely love it when we all get together. Especially now that we have LOs. DH is the oldest boy of 8 siblings and I really enjoy the large family dynamics when we are with his family. So, we would like to have at least three and are planning to have a mix of bio and adopted kids. I really like the idea of five, but am a little scared of that too. Maysprout on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436371 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 12:00:49 +0000 Maysprout 1436371@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think the sibling relationships are a big reason for us too. I have 3 sisters and there's been times when relationships have been good and meh with each. But having the other siblings keeps you tied when otherwise you might let a relationship drift off. My husband's youngest bro is much younger and he's commented many times how the youngest brought him and his older bro home when they may have otherwise visited home a lot less and visited each other a lot less. Baby Boy Mom on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436252 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 11:28:27 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1436252@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Firstly, because we have two and I really don't feel our family is complete if that makes sense. I've always wanted a big family both for the siblings to have options and also just because I love the bustle/ different dynamics that I've seen with my cousins but never had myself. birdofafeather on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436184 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 11:12:50 +0000 birdofafeather 1436184@https://boards.hellobee.com/ we also each grew up in families of 3 kids like @Mrs. Blue: so for me, 5 people has always equaled a family to me. my brother and i aren't close, but my sister and i are getting closer. my brother and sister have always been close since they're closer in age. DH has a twin sister, but he's actually closer to his older sister. his sisters lived together for years and are thick as thieves, so family dynamics are always changing for us. it was pretty easy for us to land on 3 kids because that's what we both know. that's why i had assumed LO#1 was a girl because both of our families have oldest girls born in january (also how our family started! DD born in january!) we say we'll re-evaluate after 2, but honestly, i can't see that being the end for us. 4 for some reason seems like a lot more though! you need a whole new car for sure! ha. oliviaoblivia on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436146 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 11:01:54 +0000 oliviaoblivia 1436146@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We'd like four if my body is up to it. I'm coming up on 33 so hopefully I can pop them out quickly enough before I'm too old. I've always wanted a big family. I grew up with two sisters and would have loved to have had more. DH is one of nine and is equally excited about a big family. Mrs. Confetti on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436131 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:58:49 +0000 Mrs. Confetti 1436131@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Mrs. Blue: "if this old body can woman up for another pregnancy" love how you phrased that - so so funny and so true for many of us. I want at least 3. I just have one sister, and we aren't that close, which makes me think that with more kids, there's a higher likelihood that they will be close with at least one sib. And she doesn't even know if she'll have kids, which makes be sad to think C won't have cousins on our side. Makes me want to do what I can to make sure we have a large vibrant family with cousins and fun family gatherings when I have grandkids. Mrs. Blue on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436106 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:54:19 +0000 Mrs. Blue 1436106@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @TemperanceBrennan: That's what my mom has always said about two boys and two girls. I think I agree and would love that, but like you said...not in my hands unless we adopt. @swurlygurl: LOVE her! I took her Snap Shop class. She makes me want five kids and a chicken coop...but maybe not the chickens. :silly: We've always talked about having at least 3, maybe 4. Having twins right off the bat made us waiver on that for a bit while we were in the really overwhelming phase, but now I think we'll definitely have a #3. We'll see about a #4 later. It would depend on finances, what gender our next one is, and frankly, if this old body can woman up for another pregnancy. Ughh... We both grew up in families of 3 kids, so that seems normal to us. I'm SO thankful I have two brothers because I'm super close to one and not very close to the other, though we get along fine now. If it had just been two of us, I might not have an awesome sibling relationship like I do. I think having more siblings gives your kids a better chance of having super tight relationships with at least one sibling. We like the crazy chaos of big families and we both know a lot of people with 4 kids that make it seem like a lot of fun, in spite of the added stresses and responsibilities. Money does stress me out a little bit. I don't mind not paying for 100% of their college (our parents didn't do that for us), but I do want to be able to help them with it and not have them come out of college with tons of student loans. That's probably my biggest hang up with the idea of 4. We shall see. hilsy85 on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436077 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:42:53 +0000 hilsy85 1436077@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @CupQuakeWalk: pretty much this! I love the idea of a large, noisy family, and I think that the more the merrier, assuming we can comfortably afford it. CupQuakeWalk on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436071 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:41:09 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 1436071@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I absolutely want 3. I am open to 4. Dh really wants 4, so most likely that's what it'll be. I want it because: -we can financially, so I feel like: spread the love and add love to our lives - it is lonely to be just 2. - I am young, so I can, whereas if I were older, I probably wouldn't bother putting my body through that 4x over! sslm on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1436057 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:36:20 +0000 sslm 1436057@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We are possibly open to 3... we're trying to take it one kid at a time and we're only on #1 now, we'll see how #2 goes in a couple of years ;) I really love the idea of a big family. Both DH and I only have one sibling. I want to have big family dinners and craziness :) Rockies11 on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435977 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:14:24 +0000 Rockies11 1435977@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We want 3 min, 4 max. We each had 3 growing up, and we liked it. For me, it's the same as you - I want my kids and grandkids to be part of a big family get-together during the holidays. I want there to be lots of noise and bustle in the house. We have good income, so if we live below our means we should be able to afford trips and help with college. Two feels too lonely to me, and I can't imagine being done after my next baby - Ii just enjoy littles so much! septca on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435976 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:13:50 +0000 septca 1435976@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We have always said "2 with the option for 3," but I think we both lean towards having 3. I am not sure *why* exactly, it is just what feels right for our family. Maybe because DH and I each have one sibling and we have never really gotten along with our sisters... I feel like having 3 kids gives more opportunity for friendship and closeness at different ages. Also, I just really like babies and being pregnant. :wink: Beyond2 on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435973 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:12:55 +0000 Beyond2 1435973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My reasons are very similar to yours! I always wished I had more siblings ( I have 1 brother who I'm very close with, I just wish I had more!) I think the dynamics of a large family are very interesting and seem like a lot of fun. DH and I don't have a lot of value for material goods and traveling personally so we'd rather put our time, money and effort into something that we see major value in...children! looch on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435967 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:10:32 +0000 looch 1435967@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My 25 year old self would have been open to a large family, but that's not the path my life took. Maysprout on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435965 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:09:13 +0000 Maysprout 1435965@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Three does seem more hectic and crazy but both DH and I thrive a little on chaos. We come from a family of 3 and 4 and like the sibling dynamics that we grew up with. Weagle on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435961 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:08:25 +0000 Weagle 1435961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I was an only child and always wanted siblings. I had a great childhood and many close relationships with friends/cousins, but it's not the same as a sibling. I want my kids to have the opportunity to build close sibling relationships. We like the idea if having large family gatherings, a big support system, constant chaos... :) I don't know that I'm excited for more pregnancies, but we'd love to grow our family through adoptions and/or have our house open to foster parenting. I think we'll probably have a house full of kids for a long time! LuLu Mom on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435957 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:06:04 +0000 LuLu Mom 1435957@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We are currently open to 3, although I'm leaning more toward 2. DH and I both grew up with 2 siblings and I love the craziness of our immediate family gatherings, but for us finacially & space reasoning 2 makes most sense, although if we decide 3 we will make it work and swing it! I'm just 50/50 and go back and forth. swurlygurl on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435952 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:05:04 +0000 swurlygurl 1435952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Do any of you guys read ashleyannphotography.com/blog? I've been following her for 4 years now, and I looove her big family. Makes me want even 5 kids! She's slowed down on posting a lot in the last year, but I can imagine - she must be crazy busy! artsyfartsy on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435942 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 10:01:51 +0000 artsyfartsy 1435942@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I had two sisters and loved it. I grew up with my cousins as well so it was always like having a big family. I want to give my kids the same. When we all get together again it's like we are one family instead of 2 or 3. We share great memories and it's a great time. regberadaisy on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435934 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 09:58:03 +0000 regberadaisy 1435934@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We are currently open to 3. :) But ask me at the end of the year when we have 2! ;) I was 1 of 3 and the only girl! So I always envisioned having 2 boys and 2 girls. And honestly I don't see college education as a responsibility of the parent. So having 3 is financially feasible for us. It'll just mean we can't take the kids on a big vacation every year. I think the value of family & siblings are worth way more than a big yearly trip. :) I love love big families so I can't wait until the kids are older around the holidays. Memories like that are worth the financial sacrifices to me. swurlygurl on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435930 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 09:56:00 +0000 swurlygurl 1435930@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I had 1 sibling, and always wanted more. DH has 2 siblings, and it's fun to get together with all the spouses and now children. I've also always loved kids and rowdy households with all the laughing and running around and crazy fun messes. I had a very quiet household growing up, and am looking forward to something different. If I could choose, I would have 4 girls :) lilyann on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435929 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 09:55:56 +0000 lilyann 1435929@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I am open to 3. Currently due in June with DS #2 so we will see how 2 goes first! I have similar visions as you, tons of family around the holidays, etc. My family is very small and I always envy big families. I would like for my kids to be close but I know that is not always the case with siblings but I am going to do my best for them to grow up loving and respecting one another. I can't lie, I am going to be a mom to 2 boys and while I know I will (and do!) love each one of them with every inch of my soul, I can't help but wonder if #3 would be a girl... petunia354 on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435928 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 09:55:51 +0000 petunia354 1435928@https://boards.hellobee.com/ DH and I grew up with 2 siblings each and couldn't imagine it any other way for our family! We'd both love 3 kids but worry about the financial stress. Will we be able to take family vacations? What about paying for college? Retirement? Ugh. Being an adult sucks sometimes! TemperanceBrennan on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435887 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 09:41:49 +0000 TemperanceBrennan 1435887@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I have a really small family and DH has a big family. I love my family, but wish I had more siblings closer in age to me. I want to adopt, and DH wants to try for biological kids so we are going to pursue both. I'm not sure if I want more than two pregnancies. My grandpa always said 2 boys and 2 girls are the best because each sibling has a brother and sister. But obviously, that's not up to us :happy: I think we will be able to handle the financial cost and emotional issues with 4, not sure about more than that though. Who knows how this might change once we have one. jedeve on "For those who are "three or four or open to more"" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/for-those-who-are-three-or-four-or-open-to-more#post-1435835 Thu, 20 Feb 2014 09:25:57 +0000 jedeve 1435835@https://boards.hellobee.com/ What are your reasons for wanting more? Two just seems little lonely to me. I feel like it outs a lot of pressure on that one relationship. I think it will be hard up front, but I'd rather have more people coming home for Christmas when I'm 60 and like the idea of my grandkids having aunts and uncles. And I know it is a big sacrifice of lifestyle and what not, but I think there is value in that. What are your reasons?