https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sat, 18 Apr 2026 09:27:22 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509749 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 14:58:38 +0000 Raindrop 2509749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>DS use to do something similar, that we felt was to stall bedtime. We also let him go hungry a few times and he learned to eat when it's time to eat.</p> <p>I was originally going to say we offer a snack a hour (which he refused till he we wouldn't give him anything at bedtime) before he goes to sleep also but it seems like your dinner is pretty close to going to sleep ours is usually 3 hours before sleep. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509720 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 14:37:25 +0000 birdofafeather 2509720@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Freckles: yeah i've heard that but she seems to not let herself starve by screaming until she gets food. her tactics have been successful! :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509704 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 14:24:00 +0000 Freckles 2509704@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We recently went through this with my almost 4 year old.</p> <p>I recently let her go to sleep without dinner. She was screaming she wasn't hungry and wanted to play, then she wanted to sleep, then she decided she would come down...but she would only eat after i put her brother to sleep, which is usually when she needs to go to bed. Grrr...i almost caved and let her just eat a banana but DH pushed me to be strong.</p> <p>I recently discovered that her preschool finishes snack time around 4pm and we have dinner around 5:45-6pm...so i've been cutting down on the amount of snacks i pack her. I also no longer give her pre bedtime snacks because that sends her a message that she can get something better if she forgoes dinner. I find that snacking has a negative effect on her mealtime habits, so i try to limit snacks.</p> <p>Just remember that pediatricians say that kids will never let themselves starve. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509676 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:52:29 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 2509676@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: kids are so crafty at that age! I'm sure she's legitimately hungry before bed (which fuels the tantruming). I'd say don't change anything yet &amp; think hard about the situation to figure out her motive. Do you sit with her when she eats the second time? What's so different about that meal that she would orchestrate this whole thing to get it? Once you know what she's trying to get, it'll be easier to deal with it. (Like, if she wants to spend time with you alone, you could carve out another time for that &amp; make the second "dinner" something like a cheese stick she has to get/eat by herself.)<br /> Also, it 1/2 infuriates and 1/2 makes me laugh when my kid spits his Daniel Tiger lessons back at me!! :grin: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509651 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:36:29 +0000 Adira 2509651@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: In that case, I'd follow @JoyfulKiwi:'s suggestion. Tell her that this (dinner) is her only chance and if she doesn't eat, you're not going to bring her food later. Then let her go hungry. She'll learn real fast to eat dinner at dinner time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509640 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:32:53 +0000 birdofafeather 2509640@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: zero milk! just water. she maybe has milk with a meal twice a month these days! and yeah, i really try to limit snacks, but maybe i'm misjudging it! afternoon snacks i try not to give carbs so she doesn't fill up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509638 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:30:48 +0000 Adira 2509638@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: Hmm... that snack doesn't sound like it would be too filling. Does she drink milk with it or anything? Maybe try giving a smaller snack and seeing if that helps? Also, does she drink a lot of milk with dinner? Maybe she's filling up on milk, but it's not really sustaining her, which is why she's hungry an hour later? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509637 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:30:35 +0000 birdofafeather 2509637@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Orchid: it's something that we usually try to work on, but i will increase my efforts to be stern about a small snack after nap. i can redirect her frustration better during the day than at bedtime! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509634 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:28:46 +0000 birdofafeather 2509634@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: anywhere from 3-4 depending on her nap. usually something small like dried blueberries but could definitely see how this is starting to effect her more!</p> <p>@JoyfulKiwi: man, i think i underestimated her! i would have said, yes, partially, but it could definitely go beyond the immediate stall and feed into the earlier not eating! i think maybe a combination of being purposeful about her dinner and reinforcing no more after this, along with a little bit of heading her off at the pass with a last ask for dinner before bed/brushing teeth and then i would feel more comfortable putting my foot down/letting her freak for a few days than i do now. i am upping my game with the requests v. yelling. i told her that i was angry and frustrated last night. she told her i should take a deep breath (a la daniel tiger) :P </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509631 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:24:58 +0000 Orchid 2509631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Could she be snacking too close to dinner time and therefore not hungry enough? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509627 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:22:25 +0000 Adira 2509627@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What time is her snack before dinner? And how much does she eat at that time? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509615 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:12:44 +0000 JoyfulKiwi 2509615@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: to me, it sounds like a purposeful stalling tactic. She definitely knows exactly what she's doing when she stops eating at dinner and she's counting on you feeling bad about it and letting her eat so she can stay up later/get attention/whatever her motive is. I don't think there's really any way to get her to eat more at dinner time until she chooses to eat more. I bet if you offered a dinner of cookies she'd still do this!<br /> I see two options. (A) ride it out and deal with it until she decides to stop and teach her to ask for more food instead of screaming for it. (B) explicitly tell her there will be *no more food after dinner, no matter what* and then stick to that. Deal with the meltdowns &amp; let her be hungry a few times until she stops. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509587 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 13:00:56 +0000 MrsSRS 2509587@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I hope it's a short phase! This sounds silly, but does she go potty right before dinner? It can be hard to eat well if you kind of have to pee. Eh. Either give a snack or tough out the fit. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer here. They both stink :sad:<br /> And I have to admit that I would discipline the screaming. In our house, for us, it's ok for you to feel hungry and tell me you're upset, but it's not ok to wake little sister. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509583 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:59:16 +0000 skipra 2509583@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 3 year old does the same thing. He will just cry and cry for hours and not go to sleep if we don't give him something. So now we just let him finish his dinner while we read books before bed. I know our problem is that his post-nap snack interferes with his appetite for dinner but his younger brother is starving for dinner and goes to bed earlier so I can't push it past 6pm. I figure it will work itself out when he gives up his nap and can eat his afternoon snack earlier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509574 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:55:02 +0000 HappyBaker 2509574@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@birdofafeather: aw man yea that is already late enough! hoping it's just a SHORT phase then and she snaps out of it soon, hang in there! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509571 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:53:53 +0000 birdofafeather 2509571@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MrsSRS: @HappyBaker: we basically eat dinner and then go to bed! we aim for dinner on the table by 615/630, then bath and hopefully in bed by 8! i can't push dinner back much further because then it just pushes bedtime back.</p> <p>@HappyBaker: one show would just lead to more screams that she wants more, so we're pretty strict with what she can play with before bedtime!</p> <p>@LulaBee: i used to ignore it, but she literally wakes up the baby who has JUST gone to sleep. :/ i had to put DD2 to bed in our room in the cosleeper to try to let DD1 cry it out for a bit. but 30+ minutes of that is grating... trying to cut it off at the pass!</p> <p>@mediagirl: she doesn't even get dessert! she would keep asking for treats before bed when we gave her one and any food we give her is dinner food or a cheese stick. :( </p> <p>i prepped her hard last night and she said she understood. DH said, did you threaten her or something?! she went down so easy! so i thought i nailed it... and then 5 minutes later, she's at her door, screaming, mama, i'm so hungry!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509536 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:34:20 +0000 mediagirl 2509536@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We are in the same situation. We tried a few things and found what works for us is good ol' bribery and harsh consequences. Don't eat now - no dessert. Don't eat now - no food later. We don't have time for messing around between dinner and bedtime with another dinnertime. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509518 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:28:33 +0000 HappyBaker 2509518@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not sure what time you are eating but is there any way to push her dinner time back? I used to try to force my DD to eat around 5/5:30 because that was more convenient for us, but she is generally not hungry until 6/6:30. I know that could be hard though if you are solo parenting!</p> <p>ETA - what we do now is let her watch her one TV show before dinner, so that after dinner we just play for 5-10 minutes and go to bed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509512 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:25:31 +0000 MrsSRS 2509512@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>What about offering the rest of her dinner 20 minutes before bedtime, and making time for it in the schedule, then no snack at bedtime. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509500 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:20:02 +0000 LulaBee 2509500@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My 3 year old is the same.... we spend a lot of time at dinner talking about how this is it for the night- if she's hungry she needs to eat. And we rarely give in to the bedtime hungry cries- we think she needs to eat when food is provided. However the few times I've caved and given her food at bedtime she's eaten all of it. So, I don't have a suggestion, just commiserating! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-3-yo-to-eat-enough-at-dinner#post-2509487 Tue, 29 Mar 2016 12:15:42 +0000 birdofafeather 2509487@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My DD1 has always had a big appetite but would ask for more or eat until she's full. Recently though, she's been saying she's all done and then right before bed screaming that she's hungry. I keep wanting to put my foot down and stop the food asking because I think it can be a stalling tactic but 95% of the time, she eats all the food we bring her (whether a snack, her cold leftover dinner, whatever!) and then goes right to bed. Last night DH was home and I was so upset about her attitude at bedtime but when I finally gave in, she ate a giant cold chicken breast from dinner! I felt terrible that I made a huge stink because she actually did eat and then go right to bed! </p> <p>How do I get her to eat to fullness during dinner time? I solo parent a lot and have a 5 month old that usually wants to go to bed at or during dinner time. I try to time it so we eat dinner all together and then I can get DD2 to bed, but it doesn't always work out so that's part of my problem that DD1 won't sit there and finish if I'm not there. </p> <p>Help me think of solutions to avoid the screaming "I'm hungry" which wakes up DD2 and delays bedtime even more. I'm at my wits end. I'll take any ideas! </p>