https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 18:27:32 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-994067 Tue, 06 Aug 2013 17:46:13 +0000 IcebergMom 994067@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: awesome! Mine just turned two in July and I think she's ready for a big girl bed! :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-993343 Tue, 06 Aug 2013 13:27:54 +0000 T.H.O.U. 993343@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@IcebergMom: She will be 2 this month! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-993314 Tue, 06 Aug 2013 13:21:34 +0000 IcebergMom 993314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: awe this is sweet. How old is your LO? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-992437 Tue, 06 Aug 2013 08:56:46 +0000 T.H.O.U. 992437@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T-Mom: Yes, we state the fact that we are leaving. There is no choice there. But we give her the choice about her door and that seems to satisfy her. We also leave a night lite on so its not too dark in there when we shut the door. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-992419 Tue, 06 Aug 2013 08:52:41 +0000 T-Mom 992419@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: ooh wow! Ok i'm going to have to try this for real. I think maybe giving choices is the part that helps? I'm so glad you are having success. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-992204 Tue, 06 Aug 2013 07:57:49 +0000 T.H.O.U. 992204@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>** Update **</p> <p>This logic has worked for almost a week now. We sit with her for about five minutes to get her calmed down and then tell her we have to go sit on the couch and we ask if she wants her door open or closed. Lately she has been saying closed and she rolls over and goes to sleep. </p> <p>I had NO idea my child could do this. It is AMAZING! No CIO needed! </p> <p>@T-Mom: Thanks for the help! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-980209 Thu, 01 Aug 2013 08:05:58 +0000 Lozza 980209@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We will stay with LO till he falls asleep if we are out of town or something, but it's just not an option at home. At almost 2.5, he's still in a crib, and our routine is to dim lights, change diaper, put on pjs, read a few books, then turn off the lights and hug/cuddle for a bit, then into the crib, and then I'll rub his back for a minute (which I think DH doesn't do, he just says good night and leaves), then I say good night and I love you and I leave. Occasionally he fusses but he gets over it quick, and most of the time he's totally fine. Sometimes we get a cheery "Good night! See you tomorrow!"<br /> Does she totally flip out if you try to leave? I'll let LO cry if it's just the fussy cry, but if he was freaking out and sounding frantic I'd go back in there. Even if it takes a while, as long as she's not frantic, I'd probably let her fuss and cry for a few nights going cold turkey. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-979909 Thu, 01 Aug 2013 00:17:33 +0000 T-Mom 979909@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: that's awesome, hope she can do it again tomorrow! We tried this a few times with DD and sometimes it worked and sometimes she would just cry. I need to be more consistent and stop this ridiculousness of laying down with her since she is a big girl now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-979708 Wed, 31 Jul 2013 21:06:04 +0000 T.H.O.U. 979708@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>**** update ****</p> <p>Tonight she did it to me again even though bedtime was pushed back to 9pm because she had over a three hour nap at daycare. She would be asleep but when I left she would cry. Finally I said, I am going to sit on te couch with dad, you are staying here to go to sleep, would you like the door open or closed? She said open so I left it open and she fell right asleep. </p> <p>Going to try this method again I think. We have to close her door though because otherwise the dog wakes her up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974560 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:58:12 +0000 honeybear 974560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: I do this too. :) My philosophy is that all's well that ends with everyone being well-rested! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974544 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:53:27 +0000 honeybear 974544@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think this is totally normal. At least, it is normal for us too, and I don't think it's a problem. I think it is just a phase. </p> <p>LO is closing in on 3yo. I rub his back or belly until he falls asleep. It takes somewhere between 10-20 minutes. He has a later bedtime because that's just what his circadian rhythm dictates and we're able to accommodate it. (Grudgingly. I'd rather he slept earlier because I'd like to have more time to clean in the evening!) I've tried putting him down at 7:30/8/8:30--it was always a fiasco. He goes down fairly easily at 9p and generally sleeps until 7a. From my perspective, 4-5 minutes, or even 20 minutes, to help a toddler/preschooler get to sleep at this age isn't a big deal. I know I'm a little out of the mainstream on this point, but I don't know any teenagers who need their mommy to help them fall asleep, so I figure this is just a phase that passes fairly quickly in the grand scheme of things. :) My suggestion is to just go with it. Unless there is some other factor at play, it sounds like things are going great! A one-time blip in the normal falling asleep routine isn't something to worry about, in my opinion. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974529 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:50:29 +0000 T.H.O.U. 974529@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rubies: The good news is that she is fully transitioned to her big girl bed. I didn't really want to stop this when she was in her crib, knowing she would be moving. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974507 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:43:13 +0000 Rubies 974507@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That must be so tough. My only suggestion would be to go cold turkey but I don't really know how possible that is for you. Eeeps! Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974503 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:41:17 +0000 T.H.O.U. 974503@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@looch: We have a stool next to her bed that we sit on. We lean over and place our hand on her back or belly. My back is already hurting this week, so bedtimes are literally painful for me right now. I don't even mind staying in the room, but bending over rubbing her back kills me. </p> <p>@mrbee: We have tried things like that in the past and she knows the difference. She actually holds our hand or arm while it is sitting there to make sure it is really us. I could try it again. </p> <p>I think we at some point are just going to have to go cold turkey. I need to get DH on board though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974496 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:38:43 +0000 looch 974496@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you stay in the room, seated on a chair or what?</p> <p>I am asking because I've managed to get my son out of our bed and into his own room, but he falls asleep with me in bed with him. Problem is I end up falling asleep too, and end up staying the night.</p> <p>No advice, just company! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974485 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:31:16 +0000 mrbee 974485@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@T.H.O.U.: have you tried out the rice sock on their back? Works especially well if you microwave briefly so it's warm! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974469 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:25:51 +0000 T.H.O.U. 974469@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Thats part of the problem is that I am her lovey. I mean seriously, she just wants to physically be touching me. She just wants us rub her belly or back until she falls asleep. I have tried a lovey and books and baby dolls and she wants nothing to do with them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974453 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:19:32 +0000 mrbee 974453@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How does she usually self soothe... does she have a lovey? Also, what's the bedtime routine now? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974441 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 07:14:09 +0000 regberadaisy 974441@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>LO started STTN at around 7.5 months for about 3 ish months? Then she got sick, got pneumonia and her sleep fell apart during/after then. Then I swear she hit a 13/14 month regression. She would wake up every 40 minutes after I put her down until 10/11pm. Then up again 1-2x during the night. Finally I decided, she was fine and I would stop going to her when she woke up. I did that and nothing changed for about a week. But after a week I noticed she stopped waking up every 40 minutes. And for the most part she has dropped her middle of the night wakings. When she does/did wake up she will cry for about 5 minutes then go back to sleep. Sometimes she wakes up and the cry is different and I know to go get her. Like the night before I did at 3am and she was just off...I think she had a bad dream. Last week she woke up once around 3 am and she had pooped!</p> <p>But as of now I am still the one that puts her to sleep 98.5% of the time so this is something we REALLY need to work on! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-974305 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 00:58:43 +0000 lamariniere 974305@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is how DS was after he learned to STTN (just over 1 year). In the beginning we would sit with him and wait for him to fall asleep. After a few weeks of that, we would tell him a firm goodnight and leave the room. He would invariably start to cry or fuss, we would peek back in and repeat the goodnight and leave. We would wait a few minutes before going back in and stretch out the time, and keep repeating and stretching out the time until he stopped. He could go to sleep on his own by about 15 months. I guess it was kind of like CIO, only since he was over 1 year, I knew he could understand what was going on and I did not have the terrible sense of abandonment like when we tried CIO when he was a younger baby. The cries were also not distressful, more like "hey guys, I know you are still there". Good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/getting-a-toddler-to-fall-asleep-without-us-there#post-973891 Mon, 29 Jul 2013 19:38:32 +0000 T.H.O.U. 973891@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So we didn't really sleep train but enough that it got us through. But we still have to stay with her while she falls asleep. Usually it's not a big deal and it takes about 4-5 minutes. Tonight she tossed and turned for over 20 minutes. She ended up in tears and DH had to go in. </p> <p>I don't know about playing with her bedtime. She would stay up till 9 if we let her but she doesn't sleep later in the morning so her bed has to be earlier so she gets enough sleep. </p> <p>Any suggestions? At Mr. Bee's suggestion, we don't ever lay down in bed with her and we read books on the couch not in bed. </p>