https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 08 Apr 2026 09:32:49 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice/page/2#post-2667115 Sun, 18 Dec 2016 20:38:33 +0000 irene 2667115@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>From my mom, I am supposed to:<br /> - spoon feed DS until he's a zillion years old<br /> - not let him use his fingers to grab food to eat because it is messy and dirty.<br /> - potty train him when he was 3 months old<br /> - quit my work and keep him at home until he is kindergarten<br /> - not take him to take classes on anything "dangerous" at such young age (4) such as swimming, soccer, ice skating.<br /> - not take him out ever. Because what's the point except it being potentially dangerous???<br /> - feed / make him eat a full bowl of rice every meal.<br /> - give him formula until he's a zillion years old.<br /> - Talk to him in Cantonese. Cantonese only.</p> <p>Amongst many others.</p> <p>From my in-laws, I don't know because I automatically tuned them out or I will die of heart attack. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2667090 Sun, 18 Dec 2016 18:50:15 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2667090@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mediagirl: I don't have much to add to this thread except that we get our car seat straps on my daughters seat twisted all the time! I am constantly untwisting them. :silly: </p> <p>@Anagram: lol when my first was under a year my MIL always talked about how fat she was, implying that she was abnormally big. She was like 60-70% in weight. </p> <p>Idk if it's just me and to each their own but I wouldn't really be bothered by a lot of the comments above except the safety stuff. But I realize I'm lucky in that for the big stuff our parents just accept what we want. And if not I just ignore them, lol!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2666916 Sat, 17 Dec 2016 20:02:57 +0000 FaithFertility 2666916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That my DD naps at age 2 my mom swears we never napped past 1........doubt it!</p> <p>She always says Ohhh she is still napping?!??! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2666862 Sat, 17 Dec 2016 14:21:59 +0000 newlypregnantlady 2666862@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh my god my ILs will not shut up about forward facing. No matter that it's illegal before two years! It's always about "her poor legs!". I've explained internal decapitation to them many times but to them it's just "the government" infringing on my daughter's right to leg room.</p> <p>Okay I really needed to get that off my chest! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2666858 Sat, 17 Dec 2016 14:12:56 +0000 Alba4 2666858@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For the most part in-laws are great, but they get offended whenever we review car seat safety and wearable blankets. We recently had to hide swaddles since MIL wouldn't use the wearable blankets for our six month old. They also don't tighten the car seat straps enough for our kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2666831 Sat, 17 Dec 2016 11:21:43 +0000 keychain 2666831@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: I feel your pain. My MIL basically only communicates now with passive aggressive comments. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2625111 Wed, 21 Sep 2016 23:11:29 +0000 Dahlia 2625111@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lemong: I wish this were true because DD has a serious baby mullet and it drives me nuts! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2625084 Wed, 21 Sep 2016 21:16:12 +0000 SweetCaroline 2625084@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>MIL had my SIL giving her kid a bottle of Karo syrup mixed with water for constipation. I was stunned speechless.</p> <p>She also turned 20 month old grandkids car seat forward facing because her legs were cramped. Safety aside, that's illegal in this state. I lost my mind and had DH call her with the assumption she simply didn't know the law.</p> <p>She also constantly commented that we were crushing DD in her infant seat and the straps were way too tight. I finally said, "uncomfortable is better than dead."</p> <p>I can't even take her oblivion when it comes to car seat safety. DD has never rode with her and I don't see that happening for a very long time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2625060 Wed, 21 Sep 2016 20:19:08 +0000 wrkbrk 2625060@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Omg where do I begin?? The one that comes to mind is MIL suggesting about 174940 times that we put brown sugar in his baby oatmeal when he was just starting solids. I don't know if it was supposed to be a joke or not - she literally said it once per day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2625023 Wed, 21 Sep 2016 18:30:35 +0000 lemong 2625023@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Anagram: My mom has similar opinions about hair! My son (22 months) has a baby mullet going. She says that we need to cut his back hair off so that the nutrients in his hair can be redistributed to his front hair so that it grows more quickly. Huh?! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2625020 Wed, 21 Sep 2016 18:24:18 +0000 Mrs. Microscope 2625020@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My MIL loves to buy bibs... Because he boys were droolers. She says they soaked their outfits in minutes, so she always had matching bibs. Great! But DD isn't a drooler. And at almost 14 months every outfit she buys comes with a bib. Because her boys were droolers. Face/palm. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2624962 Wed, 21 Sep 2016 14:24:12 +0000 alphagam84 2624962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>MIL told my husband that he should give DD water to keep her hydrated because it was warm out...she was 3 days old. It was warm that day-70's-but not hot enough to warrant being concerned about heat in the least. And did she think DD was going to be outside running a marathon or something? Come on. Let alone the fact a 3 day old shouldn't be drinking just water!!! She has said so many gems since DD was born but that one takes the cake. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2624033 Tue, 20 Sep 2016 09:23:26 +0000 Truth Bombs 2624033@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom keeps telling me that I need to find more time for myself instead of spending all my energy on taking care of my family.</p> <p>My mom was a SAHM so she just doesn't get it. When you work full time, have two kids (one of whom is EBF at 10 months so I have to pump all day and still nurse all night), and a husband who rarely gets home until bed time, finding time to go to the gym, or the spa, or shopping is hard to do. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2624029 Tue, 20 Sep 2016 09:14:59 +0000 Foodnerd81 2624029@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@DesertDreams88: my mom often says that babies slept better when you could put them in their tummies- but she absolutely acknowledges that it's not worth the extra risk and safety is more important. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623907 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 21:18:36 +0000 DesertDreams88 2623907@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>"Babies never crawl out of cribs." You're lucky yours didn't, but many do. </p> <p>"He would probably sleep better if he had a blanket or stuffed animal." No to the no to the no. He's 7.5 months old. He has STTN for half of his life already and naps decently, no need to up the suffocation risk to solve a problem that doesn't exist. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623831 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 16:29:36 +0000 mrsrain 2623831@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@nana87: my mom is the same way about socks. I especially love the passive-aggressive, "oh, MJ! Your feet must be so cold! Let's get you some socks." 🙄 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623746 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 14:27:13 +0000 nana87 2623746@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents are really good about following our lead. I also have 2 older nieces, so they'd learned better by the time lo came around ;)</p> <p>My mil is generally pretty respectful, and generally just expresses disagreement by saying vague things like "wow parenting advice is so different than in the 80s" but definitely has said things in the past that made me angry or roll my eyes, lol. Like, when lo was really young, she was constantly worrying that she was too cold and needed socks, whereas I almost always just had her barefoot (esp in the summer, bc umm it was really hot). We had a baby naming ceremony/party at their house when lo was about 2 months (in June--it was HOT) and socks just magically appeared on lo at one point--I think she was horrified in part bc she thought lo was cold but also that being barefoot was inappropriate for the occasion. I'm sure she would have preferred I have shoes on her for the party but we didn't even own any until lo was like 1, lol.</p> <p>I'm pretty sure she also thought it was ridiculous that I nursed until 22 months (she formula fed dh and sil). At one point, maybe when lo was just over 1, she even said "she has TEETH, nana, you can stop now" as if I was asking her permission. No, I'm totally good, lol</p> <p>And she'll give lo crap to eat (like sweets well before we gave them to her--during one stage she kept buying these "teething biscuits" that were really just cookies...) and park her in front of the tv whenever she's babysitting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623694 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 13:27:59 +0000 Foodnerd81 2623694@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents and ILs are generally pretty good about kid stuff, but we just moved and MIL was here and had LOTS of opinions on house stuff. I totally admit that DH and I have never had a house before, there is lots of stuff we don't know, especially with outside stuff like landscaping- we literally are googling to see if things are weeds or proper plants. But she makes comments like "LOs bed should have gone on that wall, you put it on the wrong wall" to DH. Um, that's an opinion, yours. OUR opinion is that it should go on this wall, so it's going on this wall. </p> <p>@yoursilverlining: I'm about to start another thread about the body size thing and MIL. This one bothers me a lot more than the house comments... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623692 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 13:24:01 +0000 Anagram 2623692@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Our parents are really great about this kind of thing. The only (very) small things are that my mom is 70 and eats like a bird and so, constantly declares that my kids eat "so much!" even though the older one is 20% for weight and always has been. Like she's say, oh LO1 ate an ENORMOUS lunch--a half a sandwich, carrots, AND hummus. She'll be full till 8 pm! And I'm like....no, she'll need a snack as soon as she wakes up, and dinner by 6. But my mom doesn't try to advise me or stop me from feeding them, she just doesn't really get how much a toddler would/should eat.</p> <p>My MIL has always told me that I should shave my girls' heads if I want them to have thick, lustrous hair. I just said I don't care if they have thicker hair (it's already thick enough), and she didn't bring it up again until I had LO2, when she mentioned it again.</p> <p>Thankfully, they are all fine with us saying no to suggestions. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623691 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 13:22:17 +0000 My Only Sunshine 2623691@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ah the grandparents. My DS is 4 months. My MIL last week said she thinks we need to give him solids. Her reason is that she got out my husband's baby book and he had rice cereal at 4 months. In 1984. I cannot deal.</p> <p>With my oldest, my mom could not get over that we weren't giving her water to drink. She kept saying "But don't you think she's thirsty?" And again, her reason was that she gave me sugar water. In 1984. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623688 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 13:18:47 +0000 Cole 2623688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thankfully I don't have any terrible stories about advice (although my mil left the oven open and on once and left the room to sit down and eat and didn't get why I was upset but that's a different story...) Every time she changes my daughter's diaper though she declares that she has outgrown the size we bought. There is no way a size 4 diaper wouldn't fit at 18 pounds! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623681 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 13:07:52 +0000 LulaBee 2623681@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Currently living with my parents... :meh: ... my dad is forever trying to give my 9 month old water despite my protests. He also got mad at me for 2 days (!!!) when I took a cookie away that he gave to my 4 year old without asking. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623661 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 12:29:50 +0000 avivoca 2623661@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents were kind of weird about her RF until two, especially because they turned me forward at 4 months in 1986. They also don't respect nap times or bedtime, so the one time she stayed with them, they let her stay up until 10:00, she woke up at 6, and then didn't nap until almost 3:00 in the afternoon. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623657 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 12:21:26 +0000 skipra 2623657@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom thinks the worst thing ever is that our kids like quiet to sleep. She thinks we shouldn't use white noise and should be extra noisy while they do sleep. The reason is because she likes to have parties and we need to leave her house at nap or bedtime because it is too loud.</p> <p>My dad thinks we are crazy for rear facing as long as we can and breastfeeding. He is totally grossed out by breastfeeding. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623651 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 12:13:48 +0000 arosebyany 2623651@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: I can totally see you MIL giving me a hard time about it.</p> <p>My MiL usually keeps opinions to herself and is actually pretty great, except with the car seat saftey. When I told her how much money we spent on a convertible car seat she almost had a stroke. DS is 9 months and she's already giving me a hard time about him still rear facing, so I'm sure her eyes will be rolling by the time he's three lol. I've been in 5 automobile accidents in my life. 2 involving wildlife, One that broke my nose because I was 5 and not wearing a seat belt! One where I rolled over 5 times, and one that ended with a fatality. I was a passenger during all of those accidents. Needless to say I believe in the value of car seat and seatbelt saftey. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623642 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 12:00:03 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2623642@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: so annoying. My parents think I'm super insane about car seats. "So and so is forward facing and she's six months younger then DD2." None of my girls is forward facing and they won't be for months or years. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623639 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 11:54:56 +0000 yoursilverlining 2623639@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@oliviaoblivia: I believe it. MIL is usually very laid back, but she was weirdly obsessed with LO having space to stretch out her legs, which is something LO herself *never* complained about and now complains about with her seat FF! Can't win, lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623628 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 11:45:31 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2623628@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@yoursilverlining: I read something recently that said more kid legs are broken forward facing because they fly around in an accident and hit the front seat. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623626 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 11:43:57 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2623626@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dad is obsessed with me pumping breastmilk.<br /> Every time he visits he gives me a guilt trip about my babies not taking a bottle. How he can't soothe them if he doesn't have a bottle to give them.<br /> Good luck giving a bottle to a baby that's never had one. And PS I'm not going to pump and build a stash just so you can watch her for an hour. Give her a pouch or a snack, she eats food. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-and-their-awesome-advice#post-2623611 Mon, 19 Sep 2016 11:19:44 +0000 yoursilverlining 2623611@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents and inlaws are mostly all awesome about respecting boundaries and respecting DH and I as parents and not putting in their 2 cents, but my step-MIL mentioned several times when LO was an infant that LO was "fat" and whether or not I was worried about that and whether I thought of restricting her formula intake. Sigh and &amp;^$% off please.</p> <p>My MIL also was weirdly aggressive with me about turning LO's car seat around. She made tons of super passive-aggressive comments about "poor LO's legs" being cramped and when we did finally turn her around at 4, MIL *loudly* and over exagerately was all like "Oh LO don't your legs feel so much better now that they FINALLY have room?!" lol, whatevs. My kid, my rules. Also, safety over leg space. </p>