https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 17 Apr 2026 05:23:54 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373140 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 13:52:17 +0000 MamaG 2373140@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BandDmommy: My mom is great. When she isn't interacting with the kids, she's trying to do something else helpful to me. The rest of the grandparents, eh. My mom is the best. It's part of why I'm resistant to travel to the grandparents. I don't want to spend all the money/time to have a lousy time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373130 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 13:47:09 +0000 wonderstruck 2373130@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BandDmommy: yeah, at least ours live close. That makes it easier for me to deal with, although we've still cut back on our visits and don't have them babysit. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373125 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 13:44:51 +0000 BandDmommy 2373125@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@wonderstruck: that's exactly my mil. I guess it's more common than I thought. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373123 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 13:43:41 +0000 wonderstruck 2373123@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents: Super interactive. Always cuddling, tickling, playing airplane, putting the kids up on shoulders, etc. (Although my dad makes my mom nervous because he can get a bit over enthusiastic, haha)</p> <p>FIL: Will occasionally hold, loves to play with them outside.</p> <p>MIL: despite being a SAHM and now chikdcare for my SIL's kids, she isn't affectionate at all. Takes lots of pictures but doesn't hold them or play with them. Her idea of babysitting is plopping the kid in front of the TV for eight hours. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373076 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 13:17:39 +0000 BandDmommy 2373076@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Rainbow Sprinkles: Same here. I just think it's weird. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373072 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 13:15:43 +0000 Astro Bee 2373072@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Pawprints: I would have thought it was possible that my ILs were just intimidated by our cloth diapers (AIOs and pockets that I pre-stuff), but we weren't full time in cloth until 2 1/2 -3 months, and they never wanted to change the disposables. Conversely, I almost never have to change DS when my parents are around. Dad especially is a pro at it now! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373020 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:57:20 +0000 PawPrints 2373020@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents: so enthusiastically interactive that I think DH and I could just leave the house and they wouldn't even notice we had left.</p> <p>DH's parents: they have only been able to visit once since DD was born, and she was just a few weeks old so not really capable of interacting much. So we'll see how they are when they visit for Christmas. I think they will be pretty interactive too. </p> <p>Neither of our dads change diapers though, weird since I'm sure they did when they had babies. </p> <p>MIL is actually much more involved in the hands-on stuff like diapers and feeding than my mom is - I had to kind of convince her to learn how to use our cloth diapers. But I think that's just been a matter of getting used to everything that has changed in the last 30 years. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373017 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:57:04 +0000 LindsayLou 2373017@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents: very interactive. Talking to her, moving her around (she's only 3 months), making her smile, walking her around.<br /> MIL and her husband: interactive, but it's mostly just holding her and talking to her, not much moving around or play.<br /> FIL and his wife: interactive, somewhere between the two other sets.<br /> My grandma: it's been so long since she's been around babies that she's uncomfortable. She holds my easily bored, always wants to be moving 3 month old like you would cradle an infant. Kid has never liked being held like that, so she cries. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373016 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:56:15 +0000 Rainbow Sprinkles 2373016@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom and dad are very interactive. Down on the ground with them, changing diapers, coloring at the kids table, dressing dollies, playing dress-up themselves, etc. My mom pretty much takes over when she's around and just lets me relax!</p> <p>My MIL doesn't really do much at all. She just sits on the couch and watches them and talks about how cute or how funny they are. I have never seen her play with them, ever! She doesn't change diapers, doesn't help out at dinner, nothing! It's kind of weird to me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373013 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:51:57 +0000 Astro Bee 2373013@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents are amazing with my son. They live on the other side of the country however, and only fly in for a week at a time; I've visited them once for 3 weeks, and will visit for a month over Christmas. I'm on maternity leave, so it's doable. They also already bought tickets to come see him for his birthday in April. They play, sing, rock, talk, change diapers and will put him to bed. </p> <p>My in-laws are much more hands off. My MIL was a nursery school teacher for 7 yrs, so I don't understand. She will hold him, but doesn't play. FIL will hold him when asked, and doesn't play either. They sit on the couch and watch him. They've never changed a diaper (FIL says he doesn't do that), yet they are only 2 hrs away and see him much more frequently (1-2x a month). I think they like the idea of being grandparents more than the actual reality. There has been one offer to babysit, when we had a friend's wedding, which we didn't take them up on. Honestly, I'm not keen on the idea. My parents have watched him singly or together several times. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2373008 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:49:35 +0000 jhd 2373008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LovelyPlum: It is a bit frustrating! I don't see that it's a problem for my LO to be extra attached to me at this age. If he is unable to function without mama at his side in a few years then she can criticize all she wants. But for now leave him alone! ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372991 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:36:56 +0000 autumnleaves 2372991@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BandDmommy: That sounds awful. Does she ever visit y'all or do you always go see her? Hopefully there were other family/friends nearby to make the trip worthwhile.</p> <p>My in-laws are great with LO but they only get to see him twice a year so far since they live 10 plus hours away and are not retired. My parents live close by but can't drive. My father likes to see LO and play with him for maybe 10 minutes max when we visit every couple of weeks; and now that LO is walking and getting into more things - I have a feeling my father will get frustrated more with him. My mom loves to see LO but due to her health she can't hold him and play is very minimal and for very short periods of time too. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372953 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:01:48 +0000 catomd00 2372953@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents show their affection through buying things. Don't spend much QT once they're out of the easy cuddly baby stage. </p> <p>My Inlaws watch DD 3 days a week and are very interactive obviously. Take her to the library, playground, etc. my MIL has to tell my FIL to stop bothering her while she's playing independently lol. My FIL takes her out to breakfast solo at least twice a week. We are very lucky! It stinks they're the older grandparents because they will slow down before my parents do. We don't live near my parents though anyways. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372949 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 12:00:16 +0000 mediagirl 2372949@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents - both play and interact. More than willing to watch her when needed.<br /> His parents - mom plays and interacts. Dad doesn't do as much as mom. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372936 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 11:51:19 +0000 HLK208 2372936@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My in-laws aren't close with the kids so they don't really interact. We only see them once a year so it doesn't bother me. Luckily, my parents make up for it...they play with my kids non-stop when we're around and when we aren't, they call just to talk to them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372908 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 11:37:47 +0000 LovelyPlum 2372908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@LuLu Mom: ha, no?? What is this word of which you speak?? My sisters joke that LO thinks of my dad as "that guy who lets me do whatever I want." That is awesome while we are there, and hell when we come home!!</p> <p>@misolee: yes to the sobbing. Why are you leaving me foreverrrrrrrrr? *smh*</p> <p>@jhd: your SIL sounds so frustrating! Of course he won't go to you if he doesnt know you! That's a GOOD thing!</p> <p>@Cherrybee: your ILs sound so sweet!! (PS- I keep meaning to tell you. I'm going to be in London in June for a few weeks. I would love to meet you!!)</p> <p>@catlady: discipline?? What's that?? ;) Though LO has started telling my mom "no," which brings out the Tickle Monster. It's hilarious to watch LO run away shrieking but look back, because she actually does want to get caught! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372904 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 11:31:53 +0000 Modern Daisy 2372904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents and fil/smil sit down on the couch and do not interact with DS at all. They will scream at me to tend to DS if they think there is an emergency or when they hear him waking up from his nap (as if I didn't know). They are all pretty lazy and like to be on smartphones and rest. Forget about babysitting - that is not even an option even if we hire a sitter to do all the work. They don't want the stress of being in charge. My mil is very interactive and will babysit but she is a night owl and sleeps in until 11am. So with our 5 am - 5pm schedule that offers very little help. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372900 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 11:30:20 +0000 LovelyPlum 2372900@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@BandDmommy: OMG, that would drive me INSANE to go so far for so little. Like, what's the point??? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372899 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 11:29:27 +0000 LovelyPlum 2372899@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents are super hands on. My dad is pretty much LO's favorite person, much more than either DH or I. We were at their house over the holiday, and she and he got into so much trouble. He threw all the couch pillows on to the floor and jumped on them with her; if she's playing something when we FaceTime, he'll get the appropriate props so he can play with her (think: if she's playing in a box, he will find a cardboard box and jump into it as well). He's ridiculous, and so much more playful than we were as kids </p> <p>My in laws are great with LO when we are there, but the problem is that they're not good long distance communicators. When we FaceTime, they have a hard time keeping her engaged, by singing to her, playing peek a boo, whatever. As a result, she doesn't do a great job focusing on them, so I feel she doesn't know them as well. We also don't see them as much, which is also a problem. We're working on it from our end, calling more, etc, but it would be great if they could put in a bit more effort to connect on her level. We will see how it goes when we are there over the holidays. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372842 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:51:09 +0000 gingerbebe 2372842@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Both grandparents adore DS and are great with him but my parents also tend to be overbearing and critical of lots of things I say or do. In laws are very respectful and generally keep their opinions to themselves. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372835 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:47:31 +0000 LuLu Mom 2372835@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>my parents: play with them and talk/interaction.<br /> MIL: seriously super grandma with activities planned when they are with her (although she doesn't say no...so it tends to backfire.)<br /> FIL: pretty standoffish, he's got an old school mentality of "women raise the children" even though they love him to death. He does take them for tractor/four wheeler rides which they love (he's a farmer.) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372825 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:41:19 +0000 petunia354 2372825@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do we have the same family?? Our dynamic is exactly the same. So frustrating!! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372782 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:16:45 +0000 misolee 2372782@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents are awesome with her. They still work so they are busy in their own way but they love spending time with her and I have no problem leaving her with them. They came over last night for dinner, and when they were leaving, you would have thought they were leaving for war with the amount of sorrowful crying LO was doing. </p> <p>My Inlaws are on the other side of the world. When we do see them, They both try to engage but I think it's harder for them. (They are older, the culture is a little different, etc) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372753 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:02:15 +0000 snowjewelz 2372753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Both sides are very interactive! My mom is the best with her since she takes care of her the most, and also lets her learn the most. In-laws are a little more spoiling; they are always holding her! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372750 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 10:01:12 +0000 Alivoo01 2372750@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom and aunt love playing/interacting with DS. My dad will if DS seeks him out or we ask him to watch him, but otherwise he doesn't. My dad isn't really touchy feely.</p> <p>MIL when hug and hold him, but doesn't really play with him. FIL will stop by and say something to him in passing, but doesn't play with him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372715 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 09:32:11 +0000 Smurfette 2372715@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My parents are awesome with her. They will play for hours with her. The IL's try but I have never seen them really play with her, or the grandson's for that matter. This past weekend, DH and I were outside kicking the ball with our nephews and they both just sat there and watched. FIL would throw a football every once in a while but they weren't engaging with the kids at all. They don't seem comfortable with LO at all. They also have no regard for nap, bedtime, schedules at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372706 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 09:25:14 +0000 catlady 2372706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Luckily they are all interactive and love to play with her but have different styles. However they all spoil her, and none of them ever discipline her.</p> <p>My dad - Often treats her like a slightly older kid (like a 3-4 year old instead of a 2 year old) which is good or bad depending on circumstances<br /> MIL - Always treats her in an age appropriate way, often comments on her development (she is a teacher)<br /> FIL - Still treats her like a baby (for ex. he likes to cut up her food and feed her). This hasn't been working so well lately. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372701 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 09:19:58 +0000 daniellemybelle 2372701@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>They are all very interactive but in different ways. MIL is more interactive now that LO is older and they can do activities together like baking, reading, singing songs, etc. because she is not as into "playing," like being goofy or getting on the floor. But their level of engagement with or attention to her has never been an issue for me. People just have different styles with kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372685 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 08:52:07 +0000 Mamasig 2372685@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My mom and in laws are great with them. They play with them, can take care of them, and I don't have to be there. The kids are 100% with them. My dad does nothing but say hello to them. My boys don't really even know who he is. He doesn't make much effort, but that's who he is. He wasn't really a hands on dad either, so he is what I expected. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/grandparents-interaction-with-grandkids#post-2372682 Mon, 30 Nov 2015 08:48:20 +0000 lamariniere 2372682@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My dad and MIL are very interactive. My FIL is more of the just take photos sort, but I think that's fine. </p>