https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 15 May 2026 18:59:43 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage/page/2#post-2518098 Thu, 07 Apr 2016 09:28:24 +0000 cascademom 2518098@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We won't have a third because we know what we can handle in our marriage. We don't think that a third child would be good for our marriage. Our first was so tough and colicky. Having our second, newborn time was easier and we handled it better overall. We still have issues with communication and stress. We sold our condo, moved, and DH lost his job all in a short span of time. That's been more stressful than balancing two kids and two parents. Finding time for ourselves has been hard as well as tough moments of support.</p> <p>If anything, having a second kid reinforced our need to work on our marriage and communication. Our second showed us even more how to be a team together. I wouldn't say it strengthened because it's still tough as hell. Our vision about marriage and family is clearer. We're looking for a marriage counselor to work out some communication issues as well that we can't overcome. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage/page/2#post-2518065 Thu, 07 Apr 2016 09:02:50 +0000 SLR 2518065@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'll be another one to say that number 2 is taking a toll on us. Though we are not that far into it yet (DD2 is just 3 weeks), I know it will get worse before it gets better for us. </p> <p>Our situation sounds a bit like yours. My husband didn't want another and I did. Once I resolved myself to being done at one (and starting to see the bright side of it), we had a (sort of) surprise with number 2. Right now, we are struggling with lack of sleep and lack of time and his "told you so" attitude in regards to how hard it would be with a second is making it even harder for me to bond with DD2. Since we have to divide and conquer, DH tends to handle my 3yo and I take the baby. It has really been hard on me to have very little time with DD1 and to see how much she is currently preferring DH over me. Silly, I know...but I feel like I'm missing out on all the fun stuff they are doing. She has recently really started to become her own little person that you can have real conversations and DO a lot more with, and I feel like I'm missing out on a small piece of her growing up. I'm sure a lot of it is still postpartum hormones and such, but I find myself missing her tremendously and not coping well with DD2. I find myself wishing at times we had stopped at one (again, terrible I know - but I know it will pass). </p> <p>On top of this, I think DH is unhappy with the lack of freedom he now has. I've done bedtime solo twice now and it as been brutal. (My 3yo is a huge challenge at bedtime.) It used to be easy for him to grab a drink with a friend once or twice a week or travel for work, but we aren't at a place yet where I can easily manage the both of them. I'm already dreading how much harder it might get when I'm back at work too!!</p> <p>However, there are some other factors playing into our recent issues involving a major/risky career change DH is planning to make (one that I don't fully support at this time, but that's a whole other story), so perhaps that is complicating things more than it otherwise would.</p> <p>I'm sure some of our current struggles will be a non-issue in a few months as, hopefully, the baby starts sleeping well and we find our groove. But...I do think it will be quite a while before we really have time for each other and get back to a good place overall. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage/page/2#post-2517872 Thu, 07 Apr 2016 04:31:43 +0000 Mrs. Tiger 2517872@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Having our 2nd has been very hard on our marriage, and I'm sure D's medical emergency and chronic health conditions made it even harder to deal with. I started writing blog posts many times but ultimately didn't want to our our struggles out there so publicly. As the kids get older it's easier in a lot of ways. </p> <p>I hope you sort out what's best for you all together! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage/page/2#post-2517711 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 20:13:59 +0000 erinpye 2517711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Going to 2 was harder for me in every single way than 0-1 was (worse HG, traumatic birth, very bad PPD, colicky newborn and an under 2 year old), except for the impact on my relationship with DH. Having our first was much harder on us, having our second was easier on us regarding our relationship. We feel very solid, and happy with our 2 girls! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage/page/2#post-2517194 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 12:01:28 +0000 hellobeeboston 2517194@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You've already gotten some great advice - I'll just add my two cents. We're only 6 months into being a family of 4 but I must say that DH and I BARELY talk or see each other because we're still tag-teaming the kids. The free time that we had with only one kid, is totally gone, which I think is the hardest part. He takes control of our 3yo most of the time we're all home together and I take the baby... a lot of that has to do with the fact that I'm breastfeeding and the baby HATES and refuses the bottle, so I'm still pretty chained to him. </p> <p>We both work full time and he's out the door before I get up with the kids, and then I get home and it's dinner, playtime, bath time, bed time, and then we're totally exhausted and usually just go to bed early.... and not even sleeping in the same room because the baby is still up 2-3x a night and DH can't get back to sleep once he's up. :(</p> <p>We don't even have time to fight! It's been exhausting going to two kids honestly, but great too.... No more kids for us after this, and while the baby is A LOT of work, he's the best and so sweet (even though he won't sleep, ha), and it's awesome seeing our older LO loving the baby.</p> <p>The good thing is we know this phase is temporary, and the babe is ALREADY 6 months old... We're starting to get out on dates here &amp; there, and working on getting the baby in his own room, then we get get back to sleeping together.... Sorry, kind of a ramble here - but we're in the middle of it and it's been tough, but going fast... and we both see the "light at the end of the tunnel" --- what helps us, esp my DH, is planning ahead. So we have vacations booked, and fun things to look forward to and plan that helps get us through what we know will be a short-lived tough time!</p> <p>Good luck, i know it's a HUGE decision and heard a lot of people say they thought going to 2 was easier, but we have found it to be tough! Having A BABY the second time is easier for sure, but then you have a baby AND a threenager and that's been the tricky part. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2517113 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 11:17:42 +0000 Aimed121 2517113@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pmrlady: We only have one at the moment so take this for what it's worth! Having LO was a tough adjustment (for me moreso than my husband), then we moved,far from family etc. so we decided to either have a large gap between kids or just be one and done so that we could focus on our marriage, ourselves and our LO for a while. LO just turned 3 and we now feel ready, that we are solid enough in our marriage and in ourselves and that we have had a lot of one on one time with LO. So perhaps consider waiting a year or two when you might feel more solid and like things are more under control if that makes sense and then a LO#2 might feel like a more manageable adjustment. I am also a HUGE fan of 'preventative therapy' if that is an option. I knew that LO1 would be a tough adjustment for me so saw a therapist for most of my pregnancy and for a while after, sometimes with my husband, to keep things on solid ground. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516974 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:56:30 +0000 BananaPancakes 2516974@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is one of the main reasons I want to be one and done. The first year was so so hard with DS, and I'm terrified to go through it again. Plus I feel like we have very little time together right now and we fight so much more, that I can't imagine how hard it is with 2. I don't really think it's worth the risk. I still feel like we are pretty solid, but the balance is sooooo much easier to throw off with a kid in the mix. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516973 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:56:17 +0000 travelgirl1 2516973@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I feel like having our first was harder on our marriage. Our second didn't make it worse, we knew more about how to look after a baby etc. With both of our children, my DH had had long periods of unemployment right after their births so being in each other's pockets hasn't been easy.<br /> I feel like the number of children won't impact on us as much as the fact that we do have children and therefore don't have time to ourselves and I struggle with being touched out by the kids. Once they are a little older I think we will invest more time in each other again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516956 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:46:57 +0000 Adira 2516956@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@rachiecakes: I hear you. There's definitely more that I could say on this topic, but there are some things I just don't feel comfortable sharing with the world. Marriage is definitely hard. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516945 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:41:46 +0000 rachiecakes 2516945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I admit that I hold back a lot on HB because though I love my husband (a lot!), he's not my best friend/do everything with/date nights, etc.<br /> Marriage is hard! :heart: </p> <p>I know a lot of couples that separated/divorced after their second child. </p> <p>I don't know if adding a second child would affect our marriage, but it definitely would throw the tightrope balance that we do on a day to day.. at least right now. And adding more stress to life would probably affect our marriage. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516937 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:35:17 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 2516937@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You know, I think a lot of things are hard on marriage and I see it all as part of the same ebb and flow. But whenever we go through a tough period I think of the end game and our vision for the future is still the same so we keep moving forward and then things improve again. Specifically in relation to kids I think that at the 6 week mark with both kids we were at each others' throats but the sleep deprivation got better and the kids got older and we found our groove. I can't say that those periods were any tougher than "issues" that came up while moving, while unemployed, while adjusting careers, etc. If anything I think that the love we have for our kids is actually a common denominator during the worst of times. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516934 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:33:50 +0000 Mrs. Sketchbook 2516934@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was one of the ones who claimed that her marriage got better so I want to offer some context...it got better once we realized (well I realized) that it had to get better or there wasnt going to be a marriage anymore! But for us that shift happened prior to the second baby's birth so we had a lot of motivation going in. Having another truly forced us to realize that we were basically all we had in the world. I'm not saying we don't both have other things going on, but without flexibility from each other we can't take much time for those things. We came to terms with doing things separately a lot more than we did before. We stopped trying to jam our schedule and stopped comparing the present to our childfree days. I stopped comparing myself to the perfect mom and started speaking up assertively (instead of passively complaining as I used to do), when things got bad. I also stopped thinking of divorce as failure and started thinking of an unhappy marriage as failure. I'm definitely a fan of the whole woo woo "unconscious coupling" notion that if a relationship isn't serving you, then let it go. But accepting that was part of learning how to cope with the realities of marriage and how to work within the boundaries. I think that having two made me realize...OK divorce is not a failure but it really isn't an attractive option with two so we better make it work and happily. Funny enough, the research backs this notion:<br /> <a href="http://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/everything-kids/happiest-parents-have-four-or-more-kids-study-says/" rel="nofollow">http://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/everything-kids/happiest-parents-have-four-or-more-kids-study-says/</a></p> <p>I'm not going to test this out myself, but I find it really interesting nevertheless.</p> <p>Not trying to say that this is what would work for everyone and my husband and I have done some pretty crazy stuff to try and improve our relationship, but I don't think it is dishonest or pie in the sky to say that your relationship can improve in spite of the addition of a new child. In fact, if the opposite were absolutely expected, then surely why would anyone have another? For everyone it is a crap shoot. The only times I have been able to improve my marriage in a positive way have been when I was willing to change the parts of myself that I held dear to me, and vice versa for my partner. So perhaps a litmus test would be, do I feel too stretched thin to change?Do I feel my marriage deserves the sacrifice? At my last therapy appointment I flatly told my therapist I did not want to change and she just laughed at me and said, well at least you're honest. </p> <p>I really like Gottman's seven relationship qualities. It is a pyramid, with friendship at the base. I think there are many times my marriage was on the brink if it were not for the fundamental friendship and the memory of the pre baby years we spent together. </p> <p>In many ways baby 2 was healing for our marriage. For example the day my 2nd was born was the happiest day of my life. The birth of my first ranks MAYBE in the top ten. Just because with my first I was terrified. I have to give many tasks to my husband that I kept to myself with the first, and this has healed much of the resentment I felt the first time around when I was hell bent on doing it all myself and then resenting everyone who didn't save me from myself. Maybe it is kinda crappy that it took having a baby to heal those wounds, but I must say it did. Same thing happened with my parents. I gave them more latitude with the second and also was more up front with them out of necessity and this has improved our relationship a ton. But it hasn't been a conflict-free change. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516904 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:19:26 +0000 meredithNYC 2516904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For us, the addition of the first child to our lives was honestly traumatic. My husband worked crazy hours, both of our families were a plane ride away, and breastfeeding troubles/PPD/sleep deprivation hit us HARD. I couldn't even consider having another child until our daughter turned two.</p> <p>With the second, some lifestyle factors had changed (most notably, a better job with better hours for my husband). And of course we felt more confident the second time around. However, the first 3 months really sucked. For our marriage, it was very much a "divide and conquer" approach and taking care of the kids was all we did. I mean, we barely had any time alone because if the kids were asleep ALL I wanted was to sleep myself.</p> <p>But, some things were better. For one, my husband stepped up massively and I can honestly say I love him so much more deeply for seeing the way he responded to my (and our kids') needs. The other thing is that the sibling relationship is an absolute joy to watch. My oldest is nearly 4 and the youngest almost 1. As the youngest becomes more active and responsive, the two kids spend so much time entertaining each other. It is the greatest.</p> <p>Things are really busy, but also really fulfilling. Sometimes the chaos and lack of alone time gets to me, but then I remember that this is just for a season of my life. I tend to look at the long game. What do I want my family to look like 10-15-20 years from now? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516894 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 09:14:27 +0000 pmrlady 2516894@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thank you everyone for sharing! It's good to know I'm not alone and for everyone else having trouble, I hope things get better!.. Parenting is hard! :bummed: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516843 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 08:47:33 +0000 Anagram 2516843@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think with both kids, we have gone through a period where it's hard on our marriage for a little while. I think for us, it's directly attributed to lack of sleep. Humans aren't very nice people when they haven't slept in 8 months, and that's understandable. So we are short with each other a lot of nights in a way we never were pre-kids, but I don't think this stage will last forever.</p> <p>After LO1, things improved a lot when she finally started sleeping a bit better after she was 1, and I suspect the same will happen when LO2 starts sleeping better.</p> <p>It's not just marriage for me that is upended after having kids--I've also gone through a long period of no self care after having both of my kids, and I just noticed this week that I am finally having the energy and mental space to pay attention to some of those things. I've been tracking what I eat, I've been to the gym twice--my second LO is 8 months old today and this is the FIRST TIME since she was born that I could give a sh*t about those things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516833 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 08:42:19 +0000 Adira 2516833@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Truth Bombs: Thank you! &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516830 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 08:39:52 +0000 Truth Bombs 2516830@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: Just want to jump on the bandwagon of giving you a high five for being open and honest. I hope things get better for y'all soon. Two kids is no freaking joke. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516804 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 08:23:29 +0000 avivoca 2516804@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This is something I worry about. I'm pregnant with #2, who is a surprise baby. We had a really rough time adjusting to having one. It totally rocked my husband's world and he definitely resented having to give up the immense amount of time (and money) he was used to devoting to his hobbies. The second winter (after she turned one) was the hardest. I anticipate that adding #2 is going to be difficult, but we will get through it. The first three years are going to be difficult with the reality of two in daycare, but in the end, things will be fine. Something else that will help in our situation is that now my husband has a bike trainer, so he can actually work out at home instead of grumbling if there isn't time/money for him to get out to the trails.</p> <p>For reference, we've been together for 11 years and married for almost 9, so we had a lot of time as a couple before adding one kid, let alone 2. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516795 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 08:18:23 +0000 snowjewelz 2516795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pmrlady: You are totally not alone! I have a 16 mo old, and we're definitely going for a 2nd later on this year. And this is exactly part of the reason we're waiting a little (to not have 2 under 2). Partly it's b/c of finances, partly b/c we want DD to get our 100% focus for longer, but a lot of it has to do with our marriage too. DD was definitely hard on our marriage. We go through good and bad phases. I find that mostly we don't communicate and don't try hard enough when we're just so tired at the end of a day. So knowing we are going to try for a 2nd soon, we are going to really work on this together. Our marriage is not in such a bad place that I'd have to consider postponing #2; I think we really just need to work harder than ever to make sure that we're good! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516794 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 08:17:56 +0000 Mama Bird 2516794@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That's a very good question, I think. For us, it does have a negative effect that we have kids... 99% of our fights are about them! Plus we get into all kinds of stressful situations that wouldn't come up otherwise, like being chronically sleep deprived, or not being able to do stuff we love without planning it out months in advance... never mind going from feeling like we make a decent income, to feeling rather poor. But then I remember that we really wanted them to be in our lives, and when we thought it wasn't going to happen we were so sad. Admittedly, we were hoping our family would come through more for us and at least watch the kids now and then so we wouldn't have to send them to day care sick, but we're getting by without them, and things will get easier eventually. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516761 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:47:01 +0000 Adira 2516761@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pwnstar: Thank you! &lt;3 My hope is that once #2 is potty trained and #1 is a little more independent, things will start getting a little easier and we'll start having a little more time for each other. Now it's always all hands on deck and we're exhausted at the end of the day, but my husband has needs too that have been severely neglected. I couldn't imagine our lives without two kids, but it's definitely been more of a struggle than I was expecting. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516759 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:42:17 +0000 pwnstar 2516759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I think that's incredibly brave to admit, and just wanted to add that I appreciate your honesty and openness as well. :heart: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516753 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:38:45 +0000 Adira 2516753@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: @looch: I just couldn't read all the posts about how having the second made things even better without posting the opposite side of things! Thanks for your support, ladies. &lt;3 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516752 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:38:07 +0000 pwnstar 2516752@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@pmrlady: I don't think it's a sad question, I think it's a really smart question. To me, giving my child a sibling is not nearly as important as my marriage (and the stability of my family). I think the biggest part of having a second is that your expectations are so much more in line reality . . . you don't have an idealized version of what your family will look like because, chances are, your ass got kicked a bit here and there with the first. Now that you know what's up, so to speak, I think it's easier to find/make peace with where you are. </p> <p>We were one and done for a long time . . . our first was hard in so many ways, and our relationship really took a beating. When things started to smooth out (after LO turned 2), it took a lot of frank discussions, and a lot of time, to flesh it all out, deal with it, and to let it go (it was not a smooth or pretty process either, but we couldn't keep going without dealing with several ever-present elephants in the room). I am now pregnant with our second. But I can honestly say that but for our journey, I would not have had a second. </p> <p>So many hugs to you! :heart: </p> <p>@looch: I totally agree with your first paragraph. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516751 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:37:52 +0000 skipper2010 2516751@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Each transition (going from 0-1 and 1-2) has taken a toll on our marriage, and then we've bounced back. I will say although it was still hard on our marriage the second time around, it was easier than the first because we kind of knew what we were in for. They weren't new fights they were old ones showing their face again. DH needs time to himself (well who doesn't) or else he gets miserable. The difficult thing about two is that there's very little down time. What's helped us is keeping an open line of communication and dealing with things before they get bad again. If I can sense DH is becoming stressed I take the kids and let him have some time to himself. He will do the same for me. I keep telling myself that this is just a season and this too shall pass. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516740 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:24:57 +0000 bushelandapeck 2516740@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For us, the first was extremely hard on our marriage. We ended up going to counseling and things improved enough for us to want a second. Now our second is 18 mos and it's still really hard (if not harder) on our marriage. It's hard to make time for one another, and for each of us to take time for ourselves (something we both really need). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516739 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:24:14 +0000 looch 2516739@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: I think it's great that you provided some honest feedback...I think online, people tend to only report the good stuff, or say nothing at all when there are real issues. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516737 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:23:00 +0000 Smurfette 2516737@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: you aren't a downer. I think you gave honest feedback. I personally don't see how adding another kid to your family wouldn't impact your marriage. It doesn't necessarily mean affect it in a bad way, but it has an effect for sure. It has to be more stressful and much harder to get time the two of you. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516736 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:21:34 +0000 MrsSRS 2516736@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The second pregnancy was hard on our marriage, and having two kids has brought into the light some issues we've always had and should have already worked on. It is impossible to continue to ignore problems while caring for two children. We're fine as far as divorce won't happen, but we have some mental health stuff to work on and we aren't happy with each other. We're going to start counseling. I wish we had started before the second baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/has-anyone-been-concerned-about-number-of-kids-and-effect-on-your-marriage#post-2516726 Wed, 06 Apr 2016 07:11:37 +0000 oliviaoblivia 2516726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Two and three made us better parents and partners but there's not much romance in our relationship right now.<br /> We fought a lot when our first was little and now we know what we're doing and don't fight about parenting styles anymore.<br /> We need a date though. </p>