https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 16 Apr 2026 05:01:09 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288845 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 19:47:06 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 288845@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>People don't think I'm the nanny, and most people think M is mine, but a few people have asked if she was adopted internationally or someone else's baby. Those people are rude! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288844 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 19:44:31 +0000 Sammyfab 288844@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That really sucks! Sorry you had to deal with that.</p> <p>I flew alone with my LO back in June and the TSA agent asked me who the mom was as I was putting my baby in the carrier. </p> <p>I do joke with my friends and DH about how I bet most people see me and think I'm the nanny because I look young...even though my LO looks a lot like me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288839 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 19:36:57 +0000 plantains 288839@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrsjazz: I am just amazed that people feel the need to ask, so strange. </p> <p>@Andrea: I am surprised to be honest that LIC isn't more diverse.</p> <p>@BKCaribBaby: The I'm not the Nanny t-shirt cracks me up. I find that I am surprised at how much being mistaken for the nanny bothers me. I usually am not that bothered about race issues but it makes me sad that when people see me with my daughter they assume I'm a nanny.</p> <p>We live in a large condo building too and all the nannies say hi to me all the time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288798 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 19:06:22 +0000 pastemoo 288798@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yup. Or they think I'm a babysitter. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288793 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 19:02:58 +0000 immabeetoo 288793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm pregnant now, but I am guessing I will be once he's here because I look young (particularly if I'm running errands in workout clothes/no make up). </p> <p>I don't think it will bug me that much - but I can (only) imagine that it would be much more troublesome if it was stemming from race reasons. I am sorry that you have experienced it!</p> <p>It's one of many questions involving kids that I just don't know why you would ask/assume either way, or frankly even comment on it! Something about kids just removes peoples' filter. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288724 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 18:32:34 +0000 mrsjazz 288724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: I'm sorry that happened to you but I'm not surprised at all. I saw this happen once to a woman on the train--she had dark skin and was speaking both French &amp; English to her LO who was very light (it was obvious to me that she was biracial, but I guess not to everyone)--and a woman made some kind of comment like, "What a great nanny, speaking French, too?" The French lady gave her a big side eye and said, "This is my daughter!" UGH.</p> <p>One of my friends is white and has 3 biracial children (black and white) and when she moved to her new Southern town people kept asking if her kids were adopted. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288712 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 18:25:35 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 288712@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@TurtleDoves: OHHH same thing with us and the house! Drives me nuts! "Is your mom home?" UHMMM she doesn't live here! lol so annoying! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288711 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 18:24:40 +0000 Mrs. Champagne 288711@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh no. That is frustrating!</p> <p>My DHs cousin is caucasian and married a chinese man, and they live in China. She non-stop has people asking if the baby is hers, and gets quite upset. </p> <p>Love the "i'm not the nanny" tshirt! LOL </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288117 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 06:30:31 +0000 meredithNYC 288117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Just chiming in to say I'm so sorry this happened to you. I never fail to be surprised by the way people can be such insensitive a-holes. I really hope she felt like a fool for saying something, but then again, if she's fool enough to ask you that, she's probably totally clueless. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288109 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 06:15:00 +0000 BKCaribBaby 288109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Plantains - hey there! While this hasn't happened to me yet, I am mentally prepared. I am light brown complexioned Black woman, and DH is white, so our future baby will probably not be very dark. Plus, I occasionally speak with a Caribbean accent, and I am sure I will to LO. I know I will get some nanny comments (For those unsure why I say that, many of the nannies in NYC are from the Caribbean). A friend who is a Black woman and also has a white DH has a "I'm not the nanny" T-shirt, and I may ask where she got it. :) She lives in Brooklyn like I do, so I don't know if being in Brooklyn will necessarily stop the comments. If anything, you must be an awesome mother, because these women stopped to say something. ;)</p> <p>@Andrea - Another nanny thought I was a nanny, too! I said, "No. I live here. I work from home," which is what is happening right now. We live in a fairly nice condo building. She felt so bad, but I didn't mind. We always say hi to each other now. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288096 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 05:55:50 +0000 tequiero21 288096@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>=( haven't been in that situation but sorry to hear you have to deal with that! especially in new york. but i bet in new york, there are more nannies than in other parts of the country. maybe in your area, there are a lot of nannies? i think there are a lot of women who like to work in ny or probably can't afford to be a stay at home mom since ny is so darn expensive! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288091 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 05:46:52 +0000 Andrea 288091@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: that is terrible about LIC. I've never been there and had no idea it is such a closed minded place. Sorry this is happening. :-( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288054 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 01:21:44 +0000 CupQuakeWalk 288054@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: omgosh my first reaction to your post is such sadness. I think it would break my heart if people assumed that stuff. Ugh! It also pisses me off!<br /> I don't have my LO here yet but this happens to me all the time with our home. I'm 24 and own a larger home because we bought when during the buyers market and we bought with the long term in mind. Well, people think its my parents house and when handymen or delivery people come to my door they ask for my parents. I'm like ...they are at home and I am the home owner -can I help you?<br /> Oh and every single nurse at my ob's office was jaw dropped when they found out I was married. They just assumed because of my age that I was accidentally pregnant out of wedlock. I look about 21 people say...but still. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288048 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 01:05:08 +0000 Mrs. Pickle 288048@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any kids yet (and DH and I are both white so I don't think it would ever happen), but that is so rude! Why do people think they can say the insensitive things that pop in their mind? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-288019 Sun, 09 Sep 2012 00:18:25 +0000 mrbee 288019@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: You've got my support!!</p> <p>I love Fort Greene.. we actually moved to BK specifically because of the diversity here. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287984 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 23:36:03 +0000 plantains 287984@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: I really regret moving here and am determined to rise LO in BK because I don't want her exposed to this. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287964 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 23:23:05 +0000 mrbee 287964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: Ohhh... LIC. That would do it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287946 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 22:55:59 +0000 Mrs. Pen 287946@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: oh my goodness!!!</p> <p>aww that is sooo sad :(:(</p> <p>i go out with my nanny LO's alll the time who are part Laos and I have never once had anyone question whether they were mine :)</p> <p>As for my son, no one has ever asked. BUT strangers have asked me how old I am... then after I tell them they say that they wanted to make sure I wasn't a teen mom... ummm? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287916 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 22:02:06 +0000 autumnlove 287916@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sooo sorry! </p> <p>This happened once during my maternity leave. I was shopping at a Japanese market when an older woman asked me if I was babysitting. (I am Chinese and DH is Japanese) I told her LO was mine and she seemed a little shocked and said but the baby looks all Japanese and you have tan skin like a Filipina. I was pretty pissed. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287911 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:56:01 +0000 plantains 287911@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: i used to live in Fort Greene, BK and I bet this wouldn't have happened there but I recently moved to Long Island City and it is oddly less diverse. Strange really, I didn't anticipate that at all. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287900 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:34:29 +0000 JennyD 287900@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It hasn't happened to me, but it happened to my SiL's mother, who is from Singapore and married a VERY white guy, so my SiL only very vaguely looks Asian. She has a wacko sense of humour and used to tell people yes, especially when my SiL was acting up :D </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287898 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:30:49 +0000 mrbee 287898@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: I would be so upset!</p> <p>I read a post once from an African American woman who shared a somewhat similar experience: she was breastfeeding her baby (who happened to be lighter skinned because of the father), and a woman thought she was the nanny... and asked her if she was willing and available to breastfeed other babies!</p> <p>Wow, people are ignorant. I'm so sorry you have to field questions like this! It makes me sad to see in your profile that you're from NYC... I was going to say that maybe it'd be better in a more diverse area! :( </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287886 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 21:18:29 +0000 plantains 287886@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Andrea: hahaha! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287852 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:47:54 +0000 Andrea 287852@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@plantains: yeah crazy. I'll never forget how wide her eyes got when I pointed to MY house right there. Saucers! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287851 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:46:39 +0000 plantains 287851@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Andrea: hmm, good point. All the nannies in my neighborhood are black so maybe that is why. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287850 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:43:32 +0000 Andrea 287850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes, once, by a nanny in my neighborhood. I don't think she could even see my baby. She just assumed that I was a nanny because I am not white. Everyone's white in my neighborhood besides nannies, gardeners, etc. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287847 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:41:09 +0000 plantains 287847@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Sweet T: tanks, I'm trying really hard not to take it personally. </p> <p>@Rosie Girl: That would be annoying, although I uses it's better to be mistaken for too young than too old right? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287844 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:39:18 +0000 plantains 287844@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@artbee: it is odd because my LO looks just like me too, her skin is just lighter and the Asian comes through quite a lot. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287825 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:16:34 +0000 heffalump 287825@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Nope. My lo looks just like me though. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-you-ever-been-mistaken-for-the-nanny#post-287822 Sat, 08 Sep 2012 20:11:50 +0000 Sweet T 287822@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Not the nanny, but I've been asked "Who's baby" a lot! I'm young but apparently people think I'm even younger. Ugh! People can be so rude though! Sorry you've encountered that! </p>