https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 28 May 2026 13:06:36 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-235156 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 09:10:26 +0000 ladyfingers 235156@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Ah, found the article!</p> <p><a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/11/AR2010061103251.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/06/11/AR2010061103251.html</a> </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-235155 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 09:09:48 +0000 ladyfingers 235155@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I always thought maternity leave in the states was insufficient. I'm so grateful just to get 12 weeks (according to my employee manual) even though it's unpaid, because they don't have to give me anything at all.</p> <p>However, I do not believe for a second that the government will ever set up a policy, much less pay for parental leave. I read a really interesting article about the history of maternity policy in the U.S. (I wish I could find it) that showed how close we came several times to instituting a policy, but political infighting and even the feminist movement in the 1970s (we don't want special maternity leave, we're equal) -- no joke -- has made it impossible. (I'm not anti-feminist at all, I'm just paraphrasing the article.)</p> <p>Unfortunately, we have a $15 trillion deficit. We are cutting Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid, education, etc. etc. etc. The only way to pay for something like parental leave is through taxes. Good luck getting everybody to be OK with that. It sucks, but we're just not a country that provides benefits like that on a federal -- or even, for the most part, on a state -- level. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-235135 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 08:51:44 +0000 Mrs.M57 235135@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee I never really knew how scarce the us was with maternity/paternity leave benefits especially after hearing what it is like in other countries. Way more value is placed on new families. My husband recently did a research paper for one of his college courses, which included a comparative analysis of benefits amongst other countries, it's quite eye opening how poorly the us fares. I think that it is definitely something that needs work. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234908 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 01:33:11 +0000 looch 234908@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Before I was pregnant, I thought that maternity leave policies in the US were skimpy, but I didn't (and still don't) think that the onus is on the government to provide for better policies. That costs money, and in general, it seems that the law and policy makers focus more on elder care. I read a statistic once that we spend more on the last few years of a person's life than we spend at any other point in their lives.</p> <p>Having said that, the goal of a business is to make money for their shareholders, esp. a public company. The companies have to find a way to care for their biggest asset (employees) while making a positive return for their shareholders. I think the answer is affordable childcare first, then extended maternity leave. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234906 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 01:20:18 +0000 littlek 234906@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think there should definitely be changes made to the maternity leave policy in the US. There should also be provisions that add for extended time off for preemies. My LO was in the NICU for<br /> 10 days and I feel like I should get an extra<br /> 10 days to bond with him at home. Also sending a preemie to daycare is frightening. I'm working from home for a month because I'm so worried about illness and the fact that I don't think he should be in daycare until an adjusted gestational age of 3 months old. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234881 Thu, 26 Jul 2012 00:12:29 +0000 BoogieBea 234881@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was in Singapore when my LO was born. They had just increased maternity leave from 3 months to 4 months - the extra month paid by the government. Unfortunately, that policy only applied towards citizens and PRs. My company only provided 8 weeks paid maternity. I was very bummed but I worked at home so I was able to be around when I helper cared for LO. That said, my company is very flexible for working parents to work at home if they need to. My coworker, since becoming a mom almost ten years ago works at home every Thursday and Friday to have more face time with her kids. I think that if the nature of your work permits, companies should allow more flexibility for moms (and dads as well) to work remote.<br /> My husband had up to 3 weeks paternity leave which I think is pretty good in today's standards.<br /> A combined 6 month leave between both parents would be nice. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234847 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 22:46:34 +0000 Maysprout 234847@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Agree with the others about having some paternity leave. We were lucky my husband's boss allowed him flexibility but it's sad that it is about luck. </p> <p>As for maternity leave, I don't know what the answer is. A lot of women that I know have been shown very little flexibility, so I think a start is to encourage employers to be more flexible with their employees - part-time work, logging in in the evenings, videoconferencing. There's lots of technology available that could help women transition into working motherhood without being away from her newborn for a full work day. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234838 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 22:31:12 +0000 Mrs. Sunglasses 234838@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wish you all have better parental leave. It's a reason why I love Canada so much. Even if I never had kids or didn't want any... I would be glad to contribute on my taxes for others to benefit of paid parental leave </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234830 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 22:18:22 +0000 SugarplumsMom 234830@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes. Taking care of a newborn is a lot harder than I'd expected! I can not imagine how women can do this alone while worrying about going to work soon after and often times without the help of their husbands (not being able to take paternity leave).</p> <p>Like @oliviaoblivia, we chose to live outside the States for a more family friendly country - Sweden. If we find our way back to the States and a plan is constructed for mandatory paid paternity leave, even if we decide <u>not</u> to have anymore children, I would be more than willing to help contribute. DH would too. </p> <p>Newborns deserve the love and care of both parents there with them. Parents deserve the right to be there for their baby without having to juggle the stress of work or compromising their income. As a new parent, there's enough to worry about without having to live with all that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234818 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 21:49:31 +0000 Mrs Green Grass 234818@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm just really starting to stress about it. I'm a teacher and teaching is not designed for breast-feeding! I know they have to support me but it's going to be really hard.</p> <p>I think all women should have at least 3 months off...if they choose. How can you bear to have a 6 week old in day care? It's got to be so hard!</p> <p>I have enough accrued sick leave to pay for 9 weeks, but the rules are so confusing so I don't even know if I can use all of it since Family Leave is unpaid besides benefits. </p> <p>It's confusing and stressful to say the least. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234796 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 21:20:45 +0000 mrbee 234796@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs.M57: I'm curious: how did your thoughts on maternity leave change? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234781 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 20:55:50 +0000 Mrs.M57 234781@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Yes! Especially since I work for a small company (under 50 employees) and do not have any paid leave and had very little vacation due to working for the company for only a year. My husband and I have had to greatly change our lifestyle to live from one income. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234777 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 20:51:23 +0000 oliviaoblivia 234777@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>The Canadian maternity and healthcare policies were big factors in us leaving the states. When we got married we decided on Canada because of the support for women, babies, and families. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234775 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 20:45:20 +0000 Mrs. Pen 234775@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I wish SO SO much that paternal leave was better!! My DH was allowed to use his sick time (there are restrictions on when he can use vacation time), which only amounted to about a week off. I spent two days in the hospital, so by the time we got back home he only had a few more days left with me at home. I totally was not physically able to be left alone at home by myself. I had such a traumatic birth experience and needed a lot of healing. I was so upset my husband had such a short leave. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/have-your-thoughts-on-maternity-leave-changed-at-all-since-starting-a-family#post-234768 Wed, 25 Jul 2012 20:35:14 +0000 mrbee 234768@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maternity leave (or parental leave in general) is one of those topics that is often controversial.</p> <p>Personally, since having kids myself, I feel more strongly that there should be more paid (or partially paid) parental leave. However, I feel like if we as a society feel this way, the government should step up and pay for it. The way things are currently structured, there's an adversarial relationship between female employees and companies that makes the entire system unpleasant for everyone involved.</p> <p>I'm curious: have your thoughts on maternity leave changed at all since starting a family? </p>