https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 10 Apr 2026 12:42:32 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931952 Thu, 06 Nov 2014 08:26:39 +0000 looch 1931952@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't think this problem is unique to SAHMs! I work out of the home and I am talking business when I am having convos. I mean, yeah, sometimes, we do socialize, and I have a long history with my coworkers, but I am not usually bouncing parenting scenarios off of them. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931901 Thu, 06 Nov 2014 07:22:43 +0000 Mrs. Lion 1931901@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thanks ladies &lt;3 I actually have found a couple "online" moms groups for my area and have connected with some other moms that way, but like was mentioned above, it is so hard to develop deeper friendships when there is a large group or you are constantly pulling your toddler out of the dangerous situations they get themselves into :) I think there are definitely different types of people when it comes to social interactions. Some love the big group lots of acquaintances atmosphere, but I am not one of them. I have always been one to have 3-4 really close friends that I do everything with, and my co-workers and students filled in the gaps. But with co-workers you see them several hours a day...with the moms I have met, I see them maybe an hour a week, if that. So forming those relationships is a much more slow process. </p> <p>I am glad to see I am not the only one struggling. I was starting to think I was crazy, or ungrateful, or just not cut out to be a SAHM even though it is so much what my heart has always wanted. I think now that I understand what it is that has been nagging at me I can try to find ways to fix it :) I love the idea of meeting up with a few for dinner or whatnot...We do actually have a small group who get together for freezer meal making nights, and for a book club, but with the chaos of our summer I haven't really been able to participate. That could be a lot of fun actually, assuming I can get myself out of the house post-bedtime ;) </p> <p>Thanks ladies &lt;3 I think this is part of the reason I love HB so much...I get to have "real" conversations, even if they are via the internet and with people I will probably never get to meet haha :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931865 Thu, 06 Nov 2014 04:05:50 +0000 Bubbles 1931865@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I don't have any advice but I can definitely relate. When DH finally gets home at night he's usually tired and wants to chill, whereas I am practically exploding with conversation! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931840 Thu, 06 Nov 2014 00:39:53 +0000 MrsRcCar 1931840@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I am a WAHM but I work largely by myself and balance kids at the same time. I enrolled N (25 months) in a tiny tot class once a week. I was hoping to make mommy friends because honestly I am lonely here. However no luck yet, I think everyone is feeling out the stituation. I have my fingers crossed I can make friends soon. N already has. :goodluck: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931801 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 22:49:50 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 1931801@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@photojane: my mom friends are also my friends from high school but they either work or have 4 kids (or both!) &amp; are very busy. Plus most of their kids are older than my LO so they have more of an opportunity to just let their kids play than I do when we do get together. I really miss just being with them without all the interruptions! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931781 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 22:30:00 +0000 photojane 1931781@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm so there. I make conversations with cashiers, because I am a talker and dang it... I just need to talk to someone! </p> <p>I have a group of mom friends (who were all friends from high school), and we all get together with the kids 3-4 times per month. I love them, and it's so nice to chat and spend that time together, but the time is always punctuated with little ones screaming or pooping... or whatever. We don't really chat much outside of play dates and occasional FB messages. We have girls nights once in a blue moon, but it's so tough to coordinate all of our schedules. </p> <p>My closest friend is several states away. I can always count on her to be there, and we have real, meaningful conversations... but they're via text messages. It's not the same as having a close girlfriend who I can get coffee or go shopping with, but I am thankful for her! Wish she was closer, but it's nice to have someone to talk to all the time -- this SAHM thing can be so lonely. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931779 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 22:24:54 +0000 Zbug 1931779@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Could you ask a couple of moms that seem cool to meet up for dinner or drinks one night - without kids? I think it's really hard to get to know people when everyone is running after the kiddos. You just can't have a real conversation. If the kids cooperate, going on walks could be another good option. I think it's really difficult to build true friendships when everyone is distracted. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931769 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 22:18:47 +0000 jhd 1931769@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I definitely feel this way. We moved while I was pregnant to be near my family. That is awesome, but I haven't been able to make any friends. And yes, small talk is absolutely exhausting for me. LO has had some challenges (surgeries, extra long nicu stay at two hospitals, feeding issues) so I'm just now starting to feel like I have recovered some from all that but any extra energy/time I have I would rather spend with DH or trying to lose some baby weight. I would love to make some mom friends but just thinking about it makes me tired! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931762 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 22:08:16 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 1931762@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I was just trying not to cry the other night because I feel like I don't have any friends. I mean I do but they are all working mom's so time with them is even more limited &amp; I feel so lonely sometimes. I miss the deep daily friendships I used to have. (i have DH of course but I need a mom friend! ) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931758 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 22:03:51 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1931758@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm totally with you! This has also been compounded for me by moving. Part of it is that having young children can be really isolating but another part is that it's just harder to form these deep friendships as we get older. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931733 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 21:41:37 +0000 Andrea 1931733@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I schedule girls nights with my friends pretty regularly. It is hard to have real conversations when everyone is manning multiple kids during a play date (this does get easier as your kids become older/more independent). And I get being too tired to go out. But I muster up some energy and I go out. It is always worth it! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931726 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 21:34:42 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 1931726@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Even though I'm not a SAHM, I feel this way a lot of times. I've made some new friends since becoming a mom because most of my college/close friends are still in a different life stage.</p> <p>We schedule playdates and stuff on weekends - it's easy to gravitate towards those who have kids the same age as mine and get together with them, but even so... sometimes I feel like there's a barrier there that's impossible to break through. These newer friendships still feels so surface level at times even though we've gotten together countless times and have known each other for years now. It's really hard to get deep, especially when we're manning our kids at the same time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931706 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 21:20:59 +0000 fairy 1931706@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have this same problem! I am just keeping at it and making slow progress - I almost feel like making mommy friends as an adult is a lot like dating haha. I joined a couple mom groups before I finally found one where the people seem to be looking for friends and not just acquaintances/people who happen to be going to the same events. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931689 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 21:09:05 +0000 Mrs. Yoyo 1931689@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I'm with you. Sometimes I wonder if I'll ever make any real friends again! The mommy group I joined was good for acquaintances but not friends, which is what I want and need. Acquaintances exhaust me. But it's so hard to go.to the next level when you are policing your kids. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931686 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 21:08:13 +0000 ktdid23 1931686@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Do you have a Moms Group in your city, or nearby? I joined one shortly after moving to CT and have loved the experience of meeting new moms and forming friendships. I think "Mothers and More" is a national organization; you could start by googling that! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931668 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 20:55:09 +0000 wonderstruck 1931668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I seriously feel like I could have written this post. Of course, that means I haven't figured out a solution either, so unfortunately I have no advice. There needs to be an internet dating-type site for finding mom friends, haha. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931593 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 20:07:05 +0000 Applesandbananas 1931593@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mrs. Lion: not a SAHM, but I'm involved with a play group and we are constantly planning new outings and day trips and there are a lot of the elements you described (brainstorming, problem-solving, etc. and a deeper connection!) maybe you could find a play group to get involved in, or start your own! There's another similar group (geared toward SAHMs) in my city that started a blog about all these cool kid-friendly things that go on in the city. Maybe you could start a blog and explore your city! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/having-real-conversations-as-a-sahm#post-1931560 Wed, 05 Nov 2014 19:46:26 +0000 Mrs. Lion 1931560@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So I think I finally figured out what has been bugging me lately...It isn't just the lack of social interaction with being home. I see plenty of people during the day. I think it is the constant stream of small talk. People in the grocery store asking the same questions over and over about lo or my pregnancy. Acquaintances that I meet up with at the park. LO is 20 months, but with nap schedules never lining up I feel like I haven't really gotten a chance to get to know other moms in a way that we can get past the small talk chit chat. When I was working I was constantly working with other teachers, problem solving, sharing stories, brainstorming lessons, etc. I am really missing that sense of working as a team, and I feel like the constant stream of small snippits of conversation is making me a little crazy. </p> <p>When did this get better for you? Or does it? How do you meet friends as a SAHM that you can develop more real friendships with? I have met quite a few people I think I could eventually be close friends with, but it seems like friendships develop so much slower as a parent than they did pre-kids, because our time is so chaotic with watching the kids and hanging out at the same time, and the get togethers seem so infrequent because of differences in schedules. Plus, I also feel like I hardly ever see my "old" friends anymore, because by the time I get LO in bed I am so exhausted I crash myself. Does anyone else struggle like this? </p>