https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 08 May 2026 11:00:22 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1756499 Mon, 14 Jul 2014 08:04:11 +0000 Chillybear 1756499@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I have a feeling this is going to be a 2 steps forward 1 step back process. On Saturday she fell asleep while nursing with all the lights on and didnt wake up when i tried to get her up to read to her. She slept through until 5am. I tried a couple times to get her to go back to sleep but she was wide awake (typical time we get up during the week) then she fell asleep from 7-9am (again pretty typical since she's in the car from 7-8 during the week) </p> <p>She really didnt want to nap on Sunday. and finally fell asleep during an errand run from 3-4pm. I ended up staying in the car with her so she could sleep. </p> <p>I started her routine 1/2 hour earlier last night and she still fell asleep nursing all the lights on etc and was in her crib by 8:10. She woke around 10:20 and i just laid her back down and she slept until 2:20 and it took two 10 min crying sessions and a total of 40 min to go back to sleep. I didnt pick her up but i laid her down and shushed her and rubbed her back.... that seems to work the best so far. It seems like she still needs a little help settling. But then she slept until hubs alarm went off at 5. </p> <p>So far so good i guess... Friday was definitely the worst night </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754776 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 19:57:14 +0000 ShootingStar 1754776@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: DS falls asleep all the time while having his last bottle. We moved it to before bath so aren't feeding to sleep. Usually he only dozes a bit and as soon as we pick him up to take him upstairs he wakes up. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754749 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 19:40:24 +0000 Chillybear 1754749@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Tonight she fell asleep while nursing even with the lights on and me trying to keep her awake. I set her in the crib and she stirred a bit and went right to sleep </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754387 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 10:33:59 +0000 blackbird 1754387@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds like progress!! Sleep training took us a week and it was stressful but it was the best thing we've ever done. Ever since, E has been an amazing sleeper, so I hope you have the same experience. But it took a good week to stick!! I walked outside a few times to steel myself </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754366 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 09:56:36 +0000 Chillybear 1754366@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ms.janedoe: yes she was standing probably the whole time she was crying I had to physically lay her down and kind of hold her there, or pull her legs out of a crawl while I rubbed her back until she fell asleep. It's amazing how 3-4 minutes feels so long but after that she would fall asleep. </p> <p>After nursing at 6 (which is usually our weekday wake up) I let her sleep in our bed and she didn't get up until 8 </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754280 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 08:26:29 +0000 Turd Ferguson 1754280@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: sounds awesome!! Congrats! Did she try to get up/stand up when she woke? I'm wondering if I could convince my LO to just lie back down...hmm... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754266 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 08:15:41 +0000 Grace 1754266@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That doesn't sound so bad for a first night! It sounds like there was progress. Hopefully tonight will be even better! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754235 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 07:48:05 +0000 LovelyPlum 1754235@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: yay! I hope tonight is easier still :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754183 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 06:16:03 +0000 My Only Sunshine 1754183@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: Sleep training is rough! It sounds like she's on her way. </p> <p>It seems like you just have to try a few approaches and see what works best for your family and your kid. For us, the pure cry-it-out method didn't work because she would get hysterical and I was a mess. But staying in the room and soothing her didn't work either because she would take over an hour to fall asleep (sounds like your LO is much better with this method!). We ended up doing the Ferber method and it finally worked.</p> <p>It is so hard, especially those first few nights, but it's worth it! Good luck! :happy: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754173 Sat, 12 Jul 2014 05:49:33 +0000 Chillybear 1754173@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We made it through the night, thanks for all the kind words and support.</p> <p>She woke up at 12:15 I let her cry for ten min then went in laid her down and rubbed her back until she fell asleep took about 7 min</p> <p>Woke up again around 1:00am did the same thing. She slept until a little after 6 when I went and got her and nursed her in our bed and she's currently asleep next to me</p> <p>I hope that tonight is easier and I'm proud/amazed that she slept through her consistent 4am wake up </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754117 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 23:51:00 +0000 twoofeverything 1754117@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>For me, it helped to have a stopwatch on my phone! And a few good trashy shoes on DVR. And wine! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754109 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 23:26:14 +0000 Turd Ferguson 1754109@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Sounds like it's gone alright so far, good job, lady!</p> <p>@LovelyPlum: thanks, unfortunately we are in wakeup number 4 so far. Boo. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754072 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 22:30:17 +0000 Mrs. Jump Rope 1754072@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: c was hard for us. I couldn't so CIO. My husband had to sleep train her. </p> <p>It made her hysterical. It was like she thought we were leaving her and never coming back. If we did checks, if was like a big tease. I could see in her eyes, she thought we were leaving and why wouldn't we hug her? And if we did, she didn't want to let go.</p> <p>The only thing that worked was sitting in her room until she fell asleep. It took awhile. We had to build trust. </p> <p>Now she sleeps without us just fine. She kicks is out of her room and tells us to go away. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754067 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 22:24:20 +0000 LovelyPlum 1754067@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@avivoca: go H! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1754066 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 22:23:58 +0000 LovelyPlum 1754066@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: oh man. I am sorry. I have not done this before, but could you rub her back to soothe her when you go in? That might help (or not,..just throwing out ideas) Good luck MOTN. :good luck:</p> <p>@ms.janedoe: I am so bummed to hear that you are back to square one :bummed: I hope that your night is going well. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753962 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 21:02:27 +0000 cyan 1753962@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Good luck tonight! We tried every "gentle" method I could find, and I swear, my LO just thought we were teasing her. We pretty much had to just let her cry with no checks ( they upset her more). The first night was ROUGH. The second night was rough. But, by the third night, she started to get it and the fuss was minimal. </p> <p>Does your L.O have a lovey? I think that helped us out more than anything. If we had to go in, we would just redirect her to her lovey. But, honestly, as much as it killed me, we had the best success with just staying out of the room.</p> <p>Good luck! I know how hard this is for a mama! But, it will help in the long run! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753945 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 20:57:14 +0000 avivoca 1753945@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: I'm glad that she is asleep! I had to do extinction because she gets pissed if she can see me. It gets better. Today is day 4 and she only screamed for a minute before rolling on her side and taking her paci. Last night was the hardest.</p> <p>ETA: she isn't standing, which I imagine will throw a huge kink into things. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753929 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 20:49:22 +0000 Chillybear 1753929@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Oh man I never thought it would be this hard. But she's asleep and I'm crossing my fingers that she was so worked up she'll sleep for awhile. Here's how it went down<br /> 6:15 got home from work and daycare<br /> 7:20 finished dinner and played<br /> 8:00 bath, pjs, nurse, book,<br /> 8:38 sound machine, kiss goodnight, lights out - she was already standing before I even left the room , crying fussing and saying mama mama<br /> 8:48 10 min check still crying did not pick her up seemed to be much harder after I left - more whimpering and guttural yells<br /> 9:08 15 min check tried to comfort her with out picking her up but she would not calm down, held her for a few minutes and she continued to howl when I set her back down. I had to physically lay her down and rub her back<br /> 9:22 asleep</p> <p>Advice? Tips for MOTN? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753314 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 15:16:19 +0000 Chillybear 1753314@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Smurfette: @sandy: She's 9 months old maybe i'll sit in our bedroom which shares a wall and see how she reacts to checks at 10 min intervals? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753259 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 14:56:31 +0000 sandy 1753259@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: how old is your LO? Honestly I think not being in the room is better...or at least where they can't see you. As they get older and more aware I think they fall asleep with you in the room and that is stimulating for them and when they wake up in the MOTN they are looking for you again. Where if you let them fall asleep on their own (if that's your goal) and they achieve that then when they wake in the MOTN they don't expect to see you and can put themselves back to sleep. Just my thoughts </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753258 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 14:56:10 +0000 Smurfette 1753258@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>How old is your LO? Can they sit up-stand up in the crib. I would try hiding in the room so LO doesn't get use to you being there. Seeing you could make it worse. Checks didn't work with my LO.</p> <p>Hugs it is hard. Have wine, a plan and stick with it! Three nights is all it took for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753195 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 14:22:30 +0000 Canoli 1753195@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Thinking of you, this is so tough. I think it depends on what your child's personality is like. We did a variety of things when we let our little guy CIO. The first night we let him cry it out was when we transitioned from the RNP to the pack and play. It was 45 minutes of crying. The next night was only 15 minutes. As he got older we did a combination of check ins and letting him go. Sometimes being in the room pissed him off even more. I think you should just try and prepare to take another approach if needed! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753012 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 13:14:44 +0000 dagret 1753012@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: it depends on her personality. For L, me being in the room made it worse. Other kids do better. </p> <p>I first worked on CIO for putting down to sleep, and then once we had that down I started CIO for night wakeups (one at a time). </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1753008 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 13:11:52 +0000 Turd Ferguson 1753008@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Chillybear: Ugh, not fun!! I hope it goes well for you tonight!! I'll be checking in and thinking of you! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1752966 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 12:52:27 +0000 Chillybear 1752966@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@ms.janedoe: We have the same problem, but she recently learned how to sit back down from standing but I have yet to see her go from sitting to laying down </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1752961 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 12:51:26 +0000 Chillybear 1752961@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>My plan for tonight is to do our routine, nurse and put her down awake... and sit in her room and read my nook with earplugs and reassure her until she falls asleep. Now that she can sit and stand i have a feeling i'm in for a long night. If she wakes up during the night do i do the same thing?</p> <p>Maybe i'm being the baby, but i dont think i can stomach just leaving her to cry for an hour +. We dont have a video monitor and that also makes me nervous. </p> <p>I guess if sitting in the room this weekend doesnt work next weekend we'll give full blown CIO a try. </p> <p>I'm hoping that if we make a concentrated effort on the weekend by the time monday rolls around we'll all be sleeping much better.</p> <p>But be honest here, should i just rip off the bandaid and do CIO? am I setting myself up to fail by sitting in the room with her? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1752935 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 12:42:38 +0000 illumina 1752935@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>You can do it!! What helped us was to have a plan so you aren't trying to make decisions on the spur of the moment...like whether you will do checks, if so, when and then how long will you let LO cry for. CIO was life changing for us...we did it because LO couldn't fall asleep on her own but it took one day and we have had no regressions! I would do it again in a heartbeat. Fingers crossed for you :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1752867 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 12:10:25 +0000 travellingbee 1752867@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>That was our problem too. Middle of the night wake ups. But once we got him to fall asleep on his own at the beginning of the night the rest of that all fell into place. My advice is to have a plan and stick to it. It was rough but worth it in the end </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1752828 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 12:00:11 +0000 Turd Ferguson 1752828@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Good luck!! We sleep trained at 6 months and things went great up until now (8 months)... She's learned to pull up and stand in the crib and then she can't sit down on her own OR she'll fall over and get scared/hit her head...so we are back to square one. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-me-be-brave-or-just-hold-my-hand#post-1752713 Fri, 11 Jul 2014 11:16:57 +0000 Chillybear 1752713@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@dagret: oh i hope it wont take 5 weeks! its just that from like the end of april until last weekend we constantly on the move... staying at my mom's, down the shore, vacation, earache, etc. this is the longest stretch of time where we can really develop a solid routine </p>