https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Fri, 10 Apr 2026 11:37:10 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1855086 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 14:08:50 +0000 Jess1483 1855086@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Kelley_lovelikecrazy: Not that I know of, but that's possible. He likes some blankets, just not all the blankets. I don't think he's worried I'll disappear, because like this morning, the blanket was only on my legs and it stayed there. He's perfectly willing to cover HIS head with blankets (some blankets). Toddlers... :silly: </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1855081 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 14:06:29 +0000 Kelley_lovelikecrazy 1855081@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I find this thread so interesting - and toddlers will be toddlers!</p> <p>Did anyone play peekaboo with him with a blanket or jacket? Or did he see a magic trick on TV where someone disappeared behind a blanket? </p> <p>Maybe he has a weird fear that you'll disappear? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1855022 Tue, 09 Sep 2014 13:42:33 +0000 Jess1483 1855022@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>In case anyone is still wondering...</p> <p>Jackets seem better, although not always. I was feeling pretty good, and then I sat under a blanket today and all hell broke loose, haha. We put stickers on the blanket, which helped a bit. I just kept wearing it and talking to him about it. It's definitely not about the texture, because he was certainly willing to play with it, etc, he just did not want that thing on Mama! We will keep powering through, I think. It makes him so sad, but I'm fairly certain it won't cause permanent damage. But someone file this for his future psychiatrist. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1853093 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 10:44:45 +0000 Mama Bird 1853093@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: awesome! Glad what you're doing is starting to work! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852995 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 09:42:23 +0000 .twist. 1852995@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: wow! glad to hear there has been some improvement. Hope it continues. :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852986 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 09:38:24 +0000 tysonja 1852986@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: wow! that's awesome :D </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852915 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 08:59:53 +0000 Jess1483 1852915@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Small update: so many great ideas I wanted to try right away. Once DS was totally awake (not cuddly) this morning, I pulled the most offensive jacket out of the closet. I didn't put it on, but we talked about it and played with it (well, I did. He wanted nothing to do with it). Finally I put it on. He fussed for a bit, but didn't seem as scared. We kept talking and then started playing. I let him put stickers on the jacket. I am wearing it now and he seems ok with it. We will keep working! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852795 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 07:56:37 +0000 Jess1483 1852795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@tysonja: Thanks. We probably will do some of that. I'm starting to think it's just that he likes to feel my skin when I'm holding him, so he might react more when he's in short sleeves or when he's feeling extra cuddly. We'll start talking about that and I'll pay attention to the "skin" ratio.<br /> @JennyD: That's a good idea. We'll work on that.<br /> @looch: I'm thinking giving him a heads up might make it worse, but I'll give it a shot. He's pretty good about "in one minute, we're going to go take a bath," so perhaps some extra warning will work.<br /> @Mamaof2: It really bothers him to see me put on the jacket, it still bothers him when I walk in with the jacket on. Sometimes it won't bother him for 20 minutes, and then all of a sudden it bothers him. I'm so confused. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852768 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 07:12:09 +0000 Mamaof2 1852768@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: does it happen when he sees you put on the jacket? What if you walked in a room with the jacket already on - would that bother him to?</p> <p>No answers just thinking of reasons </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852759 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 07:03:11 +0000 looch 1852759@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>This sounds like something my son would do, out of nowhere, something just triggers a strange reaction on his part.</p> <p>Usually, how I handle this kind of stuff is to help him with the transition, like giving him a heads up. The last thing I would do is change my behaviour, he's got to learn how to accept things...so a lot of my discussion with him around scenarios like this is that "people play differently, they talk differently, they look different, etc." </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852678 Mon, 08 Sep 2014 00:08:54 +0000 JennyD 1852678@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: wow! This is a good one!</p> <p>When my LO goes through weird inexplicable phases like this, I find that giving notice ("in two minutes it's time to put our jackets on and go outside!") and group mentality work well ("mama wears a jacket and daddy wears a jacket and H wears a jacket. We all have jackets! We're all the same!")</p> <p>Totally weird and frustrating. Good luck! You have more patience than me! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852648 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 23:08:04 +0000 tysonja 1852648@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: oh dear, I feel for you! this is certainly a mystery. sounds like you are doing everything you can -- he's a lucky kid! :)</p> <p>hmmm the only other suggestion I have is maybe try and find some books or videos where kids or adults talk about putting on jackets for the cold weather etc (like Robert munsch's 'thomas' snowsuit') and see how he reacts to that? I think it may take a combo of explaining/making it fun, straight up desensitizing, and good old TIME .... hope you can figure it out soon and report back to us! :) good luck! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852631 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 22:33:19 +0000 Jess1483 1852631@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MsMini: I think that's pretty much where I'm at. That's how we deal with most things (the world can't revolve around him, we address feelings but live in reality). This one is just so different than his other (rare) meltdowns. If I can't figure out rhyme or reason in the next week or so, I think this is where we will be stuck. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852605 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 21:45:56 +0000 MsMini 1852605@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Rather than adjusting your wardrobe, which might not even work, I would just power through it, keep exposing him to the idea to desensitize him. It's not like you can avoid everything that freaks him out for his entire life ... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852554 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 20:41:19 +0000 Jess1483 1852554@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MamaChin: I've tried. He chooses neither. Loudly. And usually he's good with choices. But I'll keep trying! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852551 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 20:38:23 +0000 MamaChin 1852551@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe have him help you pick out what to wear, like choose between two sweatshirts? I can't begin to guess what's going on in the mind of our toddlers, but this may make the process easier. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852542 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 20:25:14 +0000 Jess1483 1852542@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mama Bird: Hm...that's possible. I wouldn't necessarily consider them all bulky, but maybe. I'll pay attention to the shape-changing nature ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852528 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 20:05:04 +0000 Mama Bird 1852528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Maybe he's figured out that you "change shape" if you wear something bulky, and it scares him? Is it always big bulky things that upset him? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852510 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 19:38:01 +0000 Jess1483 1852510@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@reyorra: he does calm down as soon as i take it off, but he most definitely does not want to wear it. It's pretty much an offensive item at that point. He sometimes needs it placed far away from him. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852480 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 18:42:14 +0000 IcebergMom 1852480@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Wow this is an interesting thread!! Wonder what it is! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852462 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 17:55:29 +0000 reyorra 1852462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>When you take the item off, does he instantly calm down? Does he take the item from you? I'm wondering if he wants to wear it, and he's jealous... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852435 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 16:15:12 +0000 Jess1483 1852435@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Applesandbananas: I get the jackets/sweatshirts from lots of different places, so I don't think that's it. It's only been the last week or so. Doesn't seem to bother him to wear his own jackets.<br /> I can't think of anything that's bothering him about when I put it on. Sometimes we're already outside and I put it on, sometimes we're going outside, sometimes I'm just cold in the house. Sometimes it bothers him if I'm already wearing it when I first see him (I had a sweater on when I woke him from nap and he didn't like it.)<br /> They're not silly questions at all, they're helping me think!<br /> He does pull down at the top of the jacket/sweatshirt. He tries to unzip, but also tries to see down my shirt. He doesn't do that when I'm just covered by a t-shirt, though, and like I said, he hasn't nursed in months (and didn't even do that when he did nurse). I'm totally lost... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852433 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 16:10:54 +0000 Applesandbananas 1852433@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Where do you keep the jackets? Could it be that he doesn't like that closet for some reason? How long has it been going on? Does he get upset when he has to wear a jacket? Is there some kind of transition that happens when you put on your jacket that could be exacerbating the situation?</p> <p>Sorry if these are silly questions, just trying to come up with some reason! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852427 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 15:55:02 +0000 Jess1483 1852427@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@lemondrop: Those are helpful suggestions--thanks! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852408 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 15:31:54 +0000 lemondrop 1852408@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Can you involve them in a game, like peek a boo? Also I'd leave them sitting out where he can see them without wearing them, during comfortable times, like play time. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852393 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 14:46:22 +0000 Jess1483 1852393@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: Those are good suggestions. When it was just my down jacket, I could see that, but now it's been all sorts of materials. I will try to pay better attention, though, to see if there's a pattern. I did have a sweatshirt that bothered him when he watched me put it on. I went to do something else, and came back with it on, and it doesn't seem to bug him. So perhaps part of it is watching me put it on? But that's definitely not all of it. </p> <p>@Applesandbananas: He doesn't go to daycare, and he hasn't shown distaste for anything that he wears or touches, just that his adults wear/touch. He did just move to a big boy bed, but I can't see a connection. Not that toddlers are known for logic... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852390 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 14:42:56 +0000 Applesandbananas 1852390@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Does he go to daycare? Maybe they have been getting rowdy before or after naps with the blankets and he's scared? Does he do it with anything else, like his blanket at bedtime? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852389 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 14:42:24 +0000 mrbee 1852389@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: Could it be related to the sound that the jackets make? The swish swish sound of certain jackets pains me. Or maybe the texture of the clothes bothers him, or the color?</p> <p>Just guessing that it could possibly be a sensory issue. But honestly, have no idea and am just guessing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852385 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 14:36:37 +0000 Jess1483 1852385@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@mrbee: it's hit-or-miss what bothers him. There are some he always hates, and some he usually tolerates, but mostly it changes. Always hates are:my down jacket, my winter robe, and blankets. He sometimes tolerates sweatshirts.<br /> This is really uncharacteristic for him. I'm lost! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/help-toddler-wont-let-me-wear-a-jacket#post-1852384 Sun, 07 Sep 2014 14:30:55 +0000 mrbee 1852384@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Jess1483: Are there particular things you can put on that don't bother him... like maybe a flannel shirt or a light sweater? It might be helpful to find out what you can put on that doesn't bother him, just to help narrow down exactly what the trigger is! </p>