Hellobee Boards Topic: How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?

Hellobee Boards Topic: How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Thu, 30 Apr 2026 17:10:29 +0000 reverie on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925856 Sun, 02 Nov 2014 01:19:49 +0000 reverie 1925856@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think it is pretty common. Growing up my mom was a stay at home caregiver and my brother and I had a strong daddy preference. Currently, my son has as a strong preference for me and I'm also (sadly) gone more than my husband! MrsMccarthy on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925710 Sat, 01 Nov 2014 20:42:28 +0000 MrsMccarthy 1925710@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I don't know of any preference in younger children but I know of little ones who are equally into both parents regardless of time spent. babynumber1 on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925633 Sat, 01 Nov 2014 19:41:06 +0000 babynumber1 1925633@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Not in our house, our LO is a total Mommas girl! Mrs. Pen on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925619 Sat, 01 Nov 2014 19:29:53 +0000 Mrs. Pen 1925619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think so. When I was a SAHM he preferred DH, now that I'm the one gone all the time - he wants me. Tanjowen on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925618 Sat, 01 Nov 2014 19:28:05 +0000 Tanjowen 1925618@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My husband is gone 4-5 day of the week, and my LO definitely prefers him. He's like a little shadow when daddy is home! NurseDMB on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925610 Sat, 01 Nov 2014 19:18:06 +0000 NurseDMB 1925610@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I should also add that until he hit 9 months, DS didn't really have a preference. There were actually quite a few times he would reach for me over DH. But from 9 months until now, he has definitely favored him. NurseDMB on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1925604 Sat, 01 Nov 2014 19:10:23 +0000 NurseDMB 1925604@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Yep, over here! My DS is 15 months and is a major daddy's boy. He always has been. I work part time nights as a nurse and am basically a SAHM. My DH works 50-60 hour work weeks, and when he's home my son is all over him. He also went through bad sep anxiety with my husband. When he's home, DS wants him to put him to bed, to comfort him after he falls, etc. Even when he's sick, if DH is home he will 100% cling to him over me! My son is all over me when it's just him and I or if other family members are around, he always comes to me. But if DH is around, forget about it! It used to really upset me and make me think I did something wrong (even though logically I know that's not true). But now I see the positives and it doesn't bother me as much - I'm happy that he's so close to his dad. I came to realize its not a popularity contest and all that matters is that LO feels safe and secure. I know my DS loves me, I just think he has a really special connection with DH. And just changing my attitude about the whole thing has really made the situation better, because he's not nearly as clingy with DH as he used to be. He prefers me to read books to him over DH though, so at least I'm good for something! Haha. I still hold out hope that one day he will switch to team mommy ;-) Worrywart on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923904 Fri, 31 Oct 2014 09:14:53 +0000 Worrywart 1923904@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I am a full time WOH mom and my husband WAH and is with DD all day long. She much prefers Mama when I'm around :happy: LuLu Mom on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923765 Fri, 31 Oct 2014 08:19:04 +0000 LuLu Mom 1923765@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I would say LO sees DH less and she is a total daddy's girl, I'm already planning on brain washing the next one to be a mom's girl! ;) looch on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923754 Fri, 31 Oct 2014 08:16:00 +0000 looch 1923754@https://boards.hellobee.com/ This was us! I was home with my son all day and he preferred my husband. Now's he switched, and he prefers me. petunia354 on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923724 Fri, 31 Oct 2014 07:53:09 +0000 petunia354 1923724@https://boards.hellobee.com/ That is us! DH works longer hours than I do and is most definitely the preferred parent. I always thought that was the norm since I was the same way with my Dad, I preferred him even though my mom was a SAHM and I could sometimes go days without seeing my Dad due to his schedule. I agree with @Mrs. Tiger that the person who is around less is seen as more exciting. BabyBoecksMom on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923620 Fri, 31 Oct 2014 05:45:22 +0000 BabyBoecksMom 1923620@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Could it just be the phenomenon of being 5 he first daughter? I have seen that happen quite a but - something special about that father-daughter bond. Andrea on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923617 Fri, 31 Oct 2014 05:37:49 +0000 Andrea 1923617@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Ditto @Mrs. Tiger. My kids don't seem to have a mommy/daddy preference, but they don't get to spend a lot of time with DH so they get craaaaaazy excited when he gets home (if they are still awake). It is cute, but it is also very disruptive to their bedtime routine. So I have requested that DH not come home too close to their bedtime, if he will be home! Mrs. Tiger on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923524 Thu, 30 Oct 2014 23:09:07 +0000 Mrs. Tiger 1923524@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think the parent who is around less is seen as more exciting. The boys are always so happy with Mr T, especially if he's around for bedtime, they want nothing to do with me :) coopsmama on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923519 Thu, 30 Oct 2014 23:00:52 +0000 coopsmama 1923519@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I'm a SAHM and DS clearly has a daddy preference despite the fact that he really only gets time with him on the weekend. I'm okay with it though and am just glad that they have such a great relationship. Mrs. Sunshine on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923466 Thu, 30 Oct 2014 22:10:50 +0000 Mrs. Sunshine 1923466@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Yes. My husband's best friend. His wife is a SAHM & he usually works a lot sometimes out of town for a week or two at a time & his son has a massive daddy preference. Even when he was tiny he preferred his dad. mrsjyw on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923464 Thu, 30 Oct 2014 22:09:14 +0000 mrsjyw 1923464@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Ds goes through phases where he is team daddy because he is gone more than I am and wants every last minute with him! It's adorable and I love it!! Mrs. High Heels on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923462 Thu, 30 Oct 2014 22:07:45 +0000 Mrs. High Heels 1923462@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Nope - I actually don't! mrbee on "How common is it for a child to prefer the parent that's around the least?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-common-is-it-for-a-child-to-prefer-the-parent-thats-around-the-least#post-1923457 Thu, 30 Oct 2014 22:03:35 +0000 mrbee 1923457@https://boards.hellobee.com/ A good friend of mine is a SAHM, and spends all day with her kids. Her husband works long hours, and only sees the kids for a little bit in the mornings and then on weekends. Despite this, her first daughter has always had a massive preference for the dad! I had always thought that kids usually prefer the parent they spend more time with, but in some cases at least that's definitely not true! I was wondering how common the reverse is... do you know of any kids who have a strong preference for the parent who's rarely around?