https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Mon, 06 Apr 2026 13:51:05 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2480014 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 13:04:18 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2480014@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I can see why she didn't like being told she could easily hide it. She knows how big she is, and if she perceives it as large she's now thinking that if she doesn't look pregnant, but she still looks bigger, she must just look fat. I can see how she got there although it's not like it's your fault. It just is what it is. Outside of telling her she's beautiful I would no longer talk about physical appearance. If she wants to talk about interviewing you could phrase things like "I just wore xyz when I was trying to hide my pregnancy" or something not directly about her shape. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2480013 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 13:02:18 +0000 pastemoo 2480013@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>20 weeks sucks. Empathize. Remind her she'll pop, too, but you've been there </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2480000 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 12:54:56 +0000 Adira 2480000@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@MUI831: I definitely agree that different people perceive things differently!! It's really hard to know what's okay to say, since everyone woman wants to hear something different! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479999 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 12:54:46 +0000 autumnleaves 2479999@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She was having a bad moment - at 20 weeks I think clothes can generally hide a pregnancy.<br /> If a friend says she feels fat and she's pregnant - I might say you look great or I know what you mean - I think a lot of us have felt that way - not happy with the numbers on the scale during pregnancy even though we're carrying a baby. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479990 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 12:49:30 +0000 HLK208 2479990@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@snowjewelz: same, or just mention that some people carry toward their backs so it's not super obvious. And I'd tell her that she's beautiful. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479977 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 12:41:19 +0000 snowjewelz 2479977@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I guess I would've tried to save it by saying something like, "No! I meant it's easy for to hide with all the different clothing options!" and just hope that she'd let it go......... </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479971 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 12:39:42 +0000 Mommy Finger 2479971@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Adira: It's funny how different people perceive things. If someone told me that I could easily hide my pregnancy, I would almost take that as a compliment in that I actually haven't gained any weight so I could hide it from someone else. But then again, I know that other people have expressed that if someone tells you how small you are when you're pregnant, they perceive it as someone telling them they're unhealthy and should've gained more. This is why I agree with you that you always just tell a pregnant woman that they look beautiful. :)</p> <p>. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479964 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 12:36:53 +0000 cat620 2479964@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I had a pregnant friend once who used to complain to me all the time about how much weight she was gaining and how she looked fat or like a whale. I never knew how to respond, but I usually just said she looked great. It didn't stop her though, because she complained about her weight until her baby was born, and then she complained about how long it took to come off. I think some people just have a harder time coping with the weight gain. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479817 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 11:32:21 +0000 MrsKoala 2479817@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>All you can do is tell her that is not true at all. It's up to her to believe it or not. :/ </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479795 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 11:19:24 +0000 Mrs. Lemon-Lime 2479795@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>She looks in the mirror everyday and knows if she's fat or not. No need to try to change her mind. However, I tell all my pregnant pals they look beautiful! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479793 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 11:17:15 +0000 rachiecakes 2479793@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Some people have a tougher time with the physical changes of pregnancy. I was one of those people. I felt totally out of control, did not feel beautiful or 'glowing' ever, I felt hideous. </p> <p>I would try to avoid conversation about her physical appearance. And if she asks, just tell her she looks great without much detail. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479782 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 11:10:55 +0000 avivoca 2479782@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would just tell her that she looks beautiful regardless. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479779 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 11:09:48 +0000 Mrs. Oatmeal 2479779@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Eh, I probably wouldn't worry about it. I'd tell her she looked beautiful regardless. And in response to your friend....I mean, isn't it sort of a compliment that she doesn't look pregnant at 20 weeks? Maybe not, but it didn't sound like you were implying she was fat? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479701 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 10:38:37 +0000 Adira 2479701@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I probably wouldn't have told someone who's 20 weeks along that they could "easily" hide their pregnancy... I'd be offended hearing that too!</p> <p>But in general, if a friend remarks that they look fat instead of pregnant, I usually say something like "Shut up, you look beautiful!" </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479688 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 10:33:47 +0000 youboots 2479688@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Eh, her issue not yours. You were trying to be helpful and she did not take it well. If it were me I would not say anything about her physical appearance during pregnancy again. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-handle-a-pregnant-friend-that-calls-herself-fat#post-2479680 Tue, 01 Mar 2016 10:31:33 +0000 mediagirl 2479680@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>One of my local friends is typically slightly above average in weight but gained some weight before pregnancy due to illness. She is about 20 weeks and can still easily hide her pregnancy. We were talking about her options for interviews recently and I told her she could easily hide it - to which she responded, "So you're calling me fat. Thanks." </p> <p>Aaaaannnd...change topic.</p> <p>How do you respond to a pregnant friend who calls herself fat/thinks she is fat while pregnant? </p>