Hellobee Boards Topic: How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?

Hellobee Boards Topic: How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 19 Apr 2026 12:34:20 +0000 snowjewelz on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2711325 Thu, 16 Mar 2017 09:55:32 +0000 snowjewelz 2711325@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @AnnabelleG: It just makes me so happy that I'm not alone in these feelings! Yeah I think it's either I nurse DD2 in DD1's room and DD1 goes to sleep quietly (which she does but not 100% consistent), or baby has to work it out while I quickly go into DD1's room! AnnabelleG on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2711171 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 23:18:28 +0000 AnnabelleG 2711171@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I don't necessarily have great advice, but I feel you. Oh my goodness, this was so hard for me when my 2nd son was tiny. I literally had to wear headphones to listen to meditation music so I wouldn't have my own meltdown while both boys were freaking out at bedtime. It was like a wack-a-mole of crying babies. I finally got to point where I could let #1 sit in a chair with a bottle in #2s room while I read stories and nursed and then I'd put #2 down awake. The one benefit to all of it was the my 2nd son became much easier to get to sleep because he had practice being put down sleepy and trying to work it out. It gets easier! winniebee on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710852 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 13:11:33 +0000 winniebee 2710852@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @snowjewelz: he cried hard for one night, came out of his bed several times until we had to threaten to take away certain privileges....whined a lot the second night. Still whines on occasion and bed time in general still takes longer than I'd like, but he lets us leave him awake and falls asleep on his own. snowjewelz on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710850 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 13:10:13 +0000 snowjewelz 2710850@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @winniebee: ugh so true. so how did it go with sleep training T? winniebee on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710847 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 13:07:40 +0000 winniebee 2710847@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @snowjewelz: I only tell u this from experience - T went to bed on his own for a long time, until age 3. Then he switched to a bed and we got in the habit of soothing him more and laying with him to fall asleep. It got out of control where we would fall asleep with him and it would ruin our night and we had no down time...and so we had to sleep train him at age 4.5! When they are both eating food and on the go there's so much more clean up from dinner, etc, at the end of the night and preparation for school the next day that there's just no way to do bedtime until 9 pm and still get those things done (and be up for work the next day!) snowjewelz on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710832 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 12:52:36 +0000 snowjewelz 2710832@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @winniebee: I agree... I think to start I'll tell her I'll stay in the room but you have to be quiet and go to sleep yourself. The most I can do is pat you if you need @Shantuck: I totally nurse her to sleep dead asleep so maybe this will force me to do drowsy/awake! Shantuck on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710701 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 10:51:33 +0000 Shantuck 2710701@https://boards.hellobee.com/ My husband travels frequently for work so I've been left trying to get both the 4 year old and the 4 month old down on my own quite a bit. I usually put the 4 month old down first and my 4 year old (who is afraid to be alone) sits in the room with me on an iPad with headphones while I feed (he helps with the baby's bath and diaper change before that final feed as well). We've been working on getting the 4 month old to go down drowsy but awake so when we are at that point of putting the little one in the crib, I tell my big guy to wait in the hallway. Then as soon as the baby is down, I focus on getting the 4 year old to bed. This seems to work well for me. Can you start working with the baby on going down drowsy but awake so there is a bit more predictability? Also, my ped said nursing sessions at 3 months should only take 20 minutes total (10 minutes on each side) and suggested that I might be overfeeding her by my marathon sessions (but we were dealing with spit up / acid reflux issues). It has been a huge relief to limit these sessions. If after 20 minutes she still seems famished I let her have a bit longer but this time limit has been working well for us. iluvboba637 on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710528 Wed, 15 Mar 2017 02:34:55 +0000 iluvboba637 2710528@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I do bedtime solo almost every night. My 4Yo is still very needy but we have made this work somehow so I'll just keep at it. 4:00 bath on alternate days for each kid. Some days both kids need to be bathed. If DD had a late nap I might push her bath to after dinner. But usually I have to do bath before dinner bc otherwise it's just too crazy after dinner. 5:20 dinner. 6:20 wash hands, change both to pj's, change Dd diaper, and brush DS teeth. 6:45 books then nurse Dd on the floor next to DS floor bed. Some days I need to pat his back. Some days he will need to lay his head on my lap/leg. Other days, especially no nap days he will fall asleep easily. Most days Dd falls asleep nursing. Once Dd had a late nap so she sat and played with a water bottle while I got DS to sleep. Water bottle ftw! :) usually both kids are asleep by 7:30 which is so critical for us because they are both super early risers no matter what bedtime I have tried. 2littlepumpkins on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710488 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 22:30:32 +0000 2littlepumpkins 2710488@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We have always just done the bedtime routines together. So with your sleeping arrangements I would think that would mean sitting in your older child's room and nursing your younger child, and then transferring your younger child to her crib. Babies change so much that your routines may change too. If they cry, they cry. It happens. Address it and don't beat yourself up for not having it perfectly planned out. Good luck! FaithFertility on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710438 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 20:42:44 +0000 FaithFertility 2710438@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I do bedtime solo 2x a week Thankfully DS goes down early 6:30-7 So DD usually is busy getting us books to read or it can watch an episode of Doc Mcstuffin as I feed him in dark room and lay him down only takes about 10 mins (bottle) Then we play/read and DH is home by 7:30 for her bath and bedtime If not I skip bath and she will go to bed with a few songs from me I think a bottle on those nights help, where you can feed K2 quicker?! If need be? Miss Flamingo on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710260 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 14:07:37 +0000 Miss Flamingo 2710260@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I was in that position 10 months ago, well I still am the kids are just a little older. I also had to put them both to sleep by myself for a whole month and then 3 months this winter because of my husband's job. I had three solutions. If I could get the baby to sleep first then I would do that. However, most of he time I would nurse the baby in DD's room. Also when things got tough I would put them both to sleep in my bed, it was bigger and we could all lay down and then move the kids after they fell asleep. Sometimes my DD got upset about the baby being there but I always tried to frame it as the baby needs her help too, or she needs to show the baby how to fall asleep. Good Luck! gingerbebe on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710259 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 14:02:45 +0000 gingerbebe 2710259@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Does your baby take a bottle? I would pump a bottle and feed the baby since its faster that way and then put the baby down while your older one watches a show or does something quiet. If the baby needs more snuggle, let the baby hang out while being worn or held while you do bedtime for the older one. Generally, DS2 can be put down 15- 30 minutes before DS1's bedtime, and DS1 can easily go 30 minutes later to bed, so that's how I would (and have) handled bedtime for both. KayKay on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710257 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 13:54:10 +0000 KayKay 2710257@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Assuming no changes to your sleeping arrangements (which I admittedly have never done!), I think my general plan(s) would be: 1) Stagger the K2 feeds so that she needs to eat around 7/730p and try to get her down then, at a minimum for a "nap". If not, at least she is happy and content while you lay with K1 -- either laying with/next to you, in a bouncer/swing/whatever. 2) Try to stagger the feeds so you nurse K2 while you are laying down with K1. I mostly did #1 when I had 2 kids, but E was a good sleeper and started early bedtime pretty early so it only rarely didn't work out that she was down (for the night or at least a long while). K would usually come sit quietly in E's room while I nursed E down. Or not so quietly and get sent to her room to wait for me :) winniebee on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710205 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 12:45:12 +0000 winniebee 2710205@https://boards.hellobee.com/ At that age, I put DS1 to bed first while cuddling/nursing DS2 - or he would occasionally sit in bouncy seat and watch bedtime. Then put DS2 to bed, since he was more unpredictable. We did not lay with DS1 though so that complicates things -- I would honestly try to break her of that habit so that you aren't stuck doing bedtime all night long!! As DS1 got older and had a later bed time (and DS2's bedtime became earlier), I put on a show for DS1 while I put DS2 to bed. Then put DS1 to bed. Truth Bombs on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710156 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:12:26 +0000 Truth Bombs 2710156@https://boards.hellobee.com/ If I had to do solo bed time I usually just let my older one watch a show on my phone in her bed while I put the baby to sleep, and then I would come do her bed time. But it was never longer than the length of one show to get my baby to sleep (or to at least stay down long enough for me to get the older one to bed). knittylady on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710154 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:04:14 +0000 knittylady 2710154@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I've blacked out that period tbh. Kiddos are 15 months apart. Whatever happened there was some inherent CIO for each boy because I couldn't be 100% there for each of them the whole time. Ended up being a great thing! Also once you figure it out I find something changes developmentally or a physical milestone for the baby and you've gotta figure it out again. Oy. bhbee on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710153 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:02:01 +0000 bhbee 2710153@https://boards.hellobee.com/ When the baby was that age I also took him in to do bedtime for older. He would generally nurse while I read books etc. I generally had to put him down after. It got better as he got older he was able to go to sleep earlier so I could have more time with big sister. It's just hard some nights so do whatever you need to do! maddyz on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710151 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 11:01:10 +0000 maddyz 2710151@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Sometimes I get LO2 (6m) down before LO1 (25m) but it's rare. I often nurse LO2 with LO1 lying across my lap in the rocking chair and then once LO1 is asleep I pick them both up and put LO1 in his crib and pick LO2 up off of him. It's silly. I have also had luck with "you need to find your sleepies on your own tonight while I take care of the baby" and close the door. There sometimes there is crying, sometimes no. But for us it's worked better to let LO1 cry it out a bit. This might not work for you, LO1 is still in his crib so there is only so much damage he can do when he's fussing to sleep. I've also learned that there isn't just one way the works or that it has to be the same every night and that's been super helpful. Ajsmommy on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710130 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 10:45:13 +0000 Ajsmommy 2710130@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I'm in sort of a similar situation... Luckily it doesn't happen that often that I have to do both alone... But the time I did I just took lo2 in with me and Nursed while still trying to do normal bedtime with lo1. It wasn't easy but it worked out. Good luck! T.H.O.U. on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710129 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 10:45:07 +0000 T.H.O.U. 2710129@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I think you may just have to gauge each day on its own. Sometimes baby is super sleepy so I put on a show for the 2 year old, hope for 30 minutes, go nurse the baby. Usually the baby goes down pretty quickly and then I can move on to the older ones bedtime and take my time with him. This is kinda the ideal situation. We have also done it where they are both in a good mood, so I get them both in PJs, try to nurse the baby while reading books on the floor with my older one. He goes to bed pretty well on his own after a bunch of hugs and kisses and songs so once I get that over with, he usually lets me leave (again assuming he's in a good mood) to go put the baby down. I just ask him to "wait in his bed" and he falls asleep. Worst case would be that you let the baby cry for a while while you put the older one to bed separately. snowjewelz on "How do you put 2 LOs to sleep if they are both needy?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-put-2-los-to-sleep-if-they-are-both-needy#post-2710122 Tue, 14 Mar 2017 10:41:33 +0000 snowjewelz 2710122@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I will need to put both DDs to sleep myself one night a week. DD1 is 27 mo and DD2 is almost 3 mo. DD1 sleeps in her own room, but we need to stay in there with her till she is asleep (sometimes she even needs to be held a little). DD2 is nursed to sleep. We are fine with this set up (we each do one) except for one night a week when DH can't do bed time with DD1. My problem is that DD2 is not predictable... Good night I nurse her between 7-8 or 7:30-8:30 and she is done. Bad nights it takes me 2+ hours to get her down. DD1 is in her room by 8 and usually asleep around 8:30. I thought about nursing DD2 in DD1's room and just hoping that DD1 doesn't make a scene and goes to sleep peacefully... That's pretty much the only way it can work, or I leave DD2 to wait/cry/whatever till I can get DD1 down?