Hellobee Boards Topic: How do you teach manners?

Hellobee Boards Topic: How do you teach manners? https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Sun, 12 Apr 2026 22:30:32 +0000 Sweet T on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623668 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 02:20:37 +0000 Sweet T 623668@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Commenting so I remember to come back to this one! We say please before giving DS whatever it is he wants and thank you when we actually give it to him, but he still whines and grunts for whatever it is. It's so frustrating! Boogs on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623652 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 02:02:22 +0000 Boogs 623652@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @sandy: Exactly, couldn't agree more! sandy on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623619 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 01:46:17 +0000 sandy 623619@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @googly-eyes: totally agree! Our pediatrician's handout at her 15 months check up had a section about sharing and how they are too young to understand completely so try to have toys that are multiples if possible during play dates (blocks, etc). At this age, she is mostly learning that she can't grab stuff and that it's fun to hand things to others. It's pretty cute b/c we went to brunch with another mom and baby and they were passing their food back and forth saying "share"...it's like a game to them :) lovehoneybee on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623598 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 01:29:50 +0000 lovehoneybee 623598@https://boards.hellobee.com/ Commenting to subscribe. HLK208 on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623595 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 01:25:38 +0000 HLK208 623595@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I was just very repetitive when DS was Cobi's age. I didn't sign though (I do with DD now). By 20 months he had please and thank you down and the whinning had stopped...for a little while. I think manners are so important so I try to be a good example. By 3, he finally got down "May I please have ____" so it takes time but he will get there. Like pp's have said, just be consistent :) sandy on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623536 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 00:52:58 +0000 sandy 623536@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Boogs: completely agree that being consistent is key! Also, completely agree that sometimes you just have to let them get upset...and they learn from that process...the alternative is giving into them and teaching them that they get to behave however they want to behave...I know discipline needs to be age appropriate, but all my friends who have well behaved kids started early and all my friends/relatives with really poorly behaved kids started way too late... Boogs on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623512 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 00:43:30 +0000 Boogs 623512@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I try to remain consistent no matter what. I just let my LO throw a full on fit if that's what it takes to get him to a place where he will say please or something like that. He will sometimes pout or cry, but when he snaps out of it he's much nicer and more agreeable. It's painful, but I try really hard to not give into the whining. Right now, for example, he's in the bath and asks DH to, "Open it!" and DH reminds him to say please. We do that for all of his requests and almost always he says please without a fight. Consistency is key. :) Mrs. Pen on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623451 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 00:09:09 +0000 Mrs. Pen 623451@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @sandy: Thank you!! That is so helpful. I will work on being more OCD with him ;) googly-eyes on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623448 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 00:05:42 +0000 googly-eyes 623448@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @Mrs. Pen: My plan is to model the best I can, and use positive reinforcement. He's still very little so he may just be getting frustrated? Sounds like you're doing all I would, and a great job! Hope he gets better at it soon. :) googly-eyes on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623445 Fri, 08 Mar 2013 00:03:26 +0000 googly-eyes 623445@https://boards.hellobee.com/ @sandy: Regarding sharing, it can take til 4-5+ years old for children to truly get the concept (at least according to what I learned in school and my experience working with kids.) Mine is way young so I truly don't know how I'll choose to parent at your LO's age, but I just wanted to give some encouragement and say you're ahead of the game, if anything. :) sandy on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623432 Thu, 07 Mar 2013 23:52:34 +0000 sandy 623432@https://boards.hellobee.com/ We put in a lot of effort to limit LO's whining...she's almost 16 months and I know we have a long road ahead of us, but this is what works for us at the moment... I have written about it before, but my LO knows I mean it when I say "[her name], no thank you"...so when she gets super whiny, I use my "mom voice" and tell her "[her name], no thank you, please stop whining and tell mama what you want." That stops the whining for the moment and she will point to what she wants and I say to her "you want your cup? say cup please"...and we do this all the time (yes, it gets tiring and exhausting, but so far it works. I feel super lucky that LO is a pretty good talker (really started saying a lot around 13-14 months) so she is pretty good at using her words. So now she says "please" all the time bc she knows she gets stuff (she walks around during story time at the library and if she sees someone with a snack she will go up to them and say "please" in her little voice). So, basically I do not tolerate whining and try to find out what she wants and when I do, I tell her what she needs to say to me in the simplest way possible and we just do that over and over and over...and she catches on so quick. Yes, sometimes she sounds like a crazy child saying "cup, cup, cup PLEASE" or "cheese, cheese, cheese, PLEASE!!!" but it's way better than the whining noise. I guess bc she was caught on with talking pretty quick, we didn't do a lot of signs. She does sign "all done" and "more" which is super helpful...we just started early on when it seemed like she had no idea what was going on (we started around 6-7 months when she started out in her high chair)...and sure enough she started signing "all done" when we get her out of her highchair...and now she does it when she's done with her meal, done playing with something, and even when she's done for the day and ready for bed. I have no idea what I'm doing, but so far, I feel like LO is very well behaved. My advice is to start out as early as possible and be super consistent (almost to the point of being OCD)...they are smarter than we give them credit for sometimes...my husband is way stricter than I am and it shocks me the things that she can do/say when he's around :) The past month we have been working on sharing. There have been times where LO wants a toy and will grab it from another child, and I will stop her and tell her to "share"...and the first few times she got very upset and cried...but I was firm that she needs to learn to share and she cannot grab toys from other kids. But it's ok that she got upset and cried a little...and we try not to redirect immediately bc she's definitely able to somewhat process what is going on...and sure enough, after 2-3 times of getting upset, now she hears me tell her we need to share and she hands toys over to other kids. I know what works for my LO won't necessarily work for others, but who knows, maybe give it a try and see what happens :) Mrs. Pen on "How do you teach manners?" https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-do-you-teach-manners#post-623361 Thu, 07 Mar 2013 23:21:38 +0000 Mrs. Pen 623361@https://boards.hellobee.com/ I am sooo bad at this and my child is becoming VERY whiny when he doesn't get his way or when he wants more of something. I've always been consistent on teaching the sign "more" but he only does it occasionally. I also try to teach the signs all done, please, milk, and eat but he won't do them consistently. He just figures it's easier to start whining to get his way... I hate it! He's a year old so I know he CAN do those things. How do you incorporate manners into daily activities? How insistent were you that they say/sign them back to you?