https://boards.hellobee.com/ Pregnancy, Baby and Parenting blog, by Hellobee en Wed, 17 Jun 2026 21:38:42 +0000 https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1873081 Mon, 22 Sep 2014 13:20:55 +0000 skipra 1873081@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine are 20 months apart and while it's not necessarily easy, it's not as difficult as I expected and I am SO happy with the age gap. I won't lie - in the first few weeks that DH returned to work I called him or my mom or my sister in tears because I just felt so overwhelmed and like I was failing my older DS. Most of it was emotional and for sure related to all those changing postpartum hormones. It was just really tough for me to see the change in my relationship with DS1 and I'm still dealing with that 4 months in but it's getting much much better. My biggest fear before DS2 was born was that I would not be able to handle both boys alone at the same time but that really is not a big deal. Having a baby the second time around is really SO much easier than the first time. Once we got into kind of a routine it's been relatively smooth sailing. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1873063 Mon, 22 Sep 2014 13:08:56 +0000 Adira 1873063@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sungirl: So encouraging to hear you say that DS1 was too young to really be jealous! Mine will be right around that age (21/22 months apart) and I'm worried about DS1 being jealous of all the time the baby spends with me once he arrives. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1873016 Mon, 22 Sep 2014 12:41:54 +0000 sungirl 1873016@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I would totally agree with @Mamasig: WOH helps! My boys are 21 months apart. Now about 4 months and 2 years and the first 6 weeks or so was tough and I needed help but for the most part I've got it down now. For the most part DS1 was too young to really be jealous and I love watching them together and can't wait until they can play </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872917 Mon, 22 Sep 2014 11:31:19 +0000 jetsa 1872917@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamasig: that's great to hear; I WOH 4 days a week. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872914 Mon, 22 Sep 2014 11:30:04 +0000 Mamasig 1872914@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@jetsa: I have to say I think it got "easier" once I kind of adjusted my expectations. You won't be able to give each one the same amount of attention your 1st got. Routines will change, personalities are different, etc. Once I told myself, things will not run perfectly, but it's ok, I relaxed more. Seeing them love each other already is awesome. I really rarely have an OMG moment. But I also WOH so that probably helps. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872895 Mon, 22 Sep 2014 11:14:17 +0000 jetsa 1872895@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@Mamasig: @Baby Boy Mom: @kml636: I bumped because mine will be 20 months. It sounds like it'll be a great spacing :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872337 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 21:59:09 +0000 GrapeCrush 1872337@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So, I can add to this now that my two are both here. Mine are 15 months apart, currently DS us 28.5 months and DD is 13.5 months. The beginning sucked, but, IMO, it was easier than I was expecting and earlier than going from 0-1. You definitely need to be more organized, and prepared to go out. It's dsunting at first, but gets easier the older they both get. Especially once the older ine becomes more independent. Some days I still think 'WTF did we do?', but more days I think it's heat that they are this close, especially when they are playing so well together. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872323 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 21:33:34 +0000 Mamasig 1872323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine are 20 months apart - 2 and 4 months. The beginning was hard but it's gotten easier as we got out of the newborn stage. I don't think it's horrible and no regrets. From day one, DS1 loved his brother. It's wonderful to see. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872300 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 21:01:21 +0000 MamaChin 1872300@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine are 16 months apart, now 22 and 6 months of age and I SAH. Months 1 and 2 were easy because baby girl just slept all the time, like 20 hours a day. Months 3 and on were tougher and sometimes down right miserable. I sent big boy to daycare 2x a week so I can have a breather and spend some time with the baby so that helps a lot. Now at 6 months into 2 under 2 I have to say I'm really glad it worked out this way. They are starting to play together and it makes me heart burst. She's startng solids so we have meals together. Her schedule is starting to settle so they have an overlapping nap. Going out with them gets easier once you get more practice. Even though the baby was a surprise I feel like this was such a blessing, I would've never had the guts to plan 2 under 2! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872269 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 20:32:53 +0000 MamaBehr 1872269@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>So, I responded to this post originally and I had no idea that only 20 days later I would find out I was pregnant with LO#3!!! So, between my first two, it is 23 months, and between my second two, the spacing is 22 months (we had 3, three and under for almost three months!) So, I can honestly say that I love the just under 24 month age difference. It can be tough (I joke that I'm worried DS#1 is going to kill DS#2 because he is so much rougher than DD was when she was 2.5 years old), but I LOVE watching the friendship between my older two develop. It melts my heart, frequently.<br /> It gets much easier as the younger one can fully express him or herself, and then they are tight as thieves. My biggest goal in child spacing was that they would have a great relationship and be friends, which is not what I have with my siblings.<br /> I am hoping to talk DH into one more baby with the same 23 month spacing! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872243 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 20:09:08 +0000 Mrs. Bee 1872243@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>i do so it's easier when there is a bigger gap. but i don't know any other life than 2 under 2 (22 months), so i wouldn't have it any other way. I would say in the past couple of months (olive is almost 3) charlie and olive have become super close friends because she is talking so much now. I think it would take longer if there were a bigger age gap.</p> <p>it is hard in the beginning -- it was a glorious day when olive dropped to 1 nap so they were on the same schedule. but somehow you just make it work! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872193 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 19:32:02 +0000 matador84 1872193@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I love having two under two. DS was 17 months when dd was born and I think it was the perfect age. He was walking, talking some and able to help with small tasks (go get the burp rag from the other room, get a diaper, etc.) he was sleeping through the night except maybe one wake up one or two times a month. He loves his sister so much and was attached to her from the moment he saw her in the hospital. He still loves her and I know he will always protect her.</p> <p>I think it would have been much harder to have them older. Now that he's almost 25 months he's much more opinionated than when he was a baby toddler. Nonetheless, I wouldn't have done the spacing a bit differently--I think it is perfect for us. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872189 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 19:30:15 +0000 jedeve 1872189@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Can I ask an addendum? Does it get easier when #1 is no longer under two?</p> <p>Ours are 17 mo apart. Life is pretty crazy. I miss going out. It just seems impossible to take them anywhere. We will do the library or park sometimes. But not much else. </p> <p>On the other hand, I don't know if they had been farther apart it would be any easier. Kids are just hard! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872186 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 19:26:50 +0000 erinpye 1872186@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Mine are a day shy of 22 months apart, and it is HARD. 7 months in, I'm still struggling often, but it gets easier and easier. I don't regret it, but I also see benefits of doing closer to a 3 year gap! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872181 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 19:23:47 +0000 Baby Boy Mom 1872181@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I think I have amnesia about much of the first year. The key to my sanity was having the older one start a 2s preschool. But I love our spacing-20 months. The boys LOVE each other, playing together and makes it easier to plan activities since they are so close. I think if the little one ever decides to STTN and we potty train I will be ready for another. ;) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872148 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 18:50:36 +0000 artsyfartsy 1872148@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We're planning on two under two for a lot of reasons. The main one is that the way our life is going (promotion for me and moving) it's either 2 under 2 or put off TTC #2 for 5+ years which I don't want. </p> <p>Baby years have been good, but it's been such an adjustment to have someone needing you for every single thing 24/7. I dont want to get out of that and adjusted and have to start all over!</p> <p>I'm also scared at the same time. Lol </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872140 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 18:45:40 +0000 kml636 1872140@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I just have twounder two. My youngest is now eight weeks and they are 20 months apart. It has not been too terrible but I will say my husband helps me a lot.</p> <p>The worst part of the day is the evening when my youngest one fusses and my older one has to have dinner/bath /story time etc. My husband have to take care of the older one while I nurse the baby while she cluster feeds. So if he didn't help me I would be screwed.</p> <p>I feel like this time will be over soon and then they will be able to play together and it should be smoother sailings! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-1872034 Sun, 21 Sep 2014 16:48:16 +0000 jetsa 1872034@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Bump :) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-699873 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 15:25:47 +0000 googly-eyes 699873@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@scg00387: This is what I'm thinking!! Luckily we've been doing well on the sleep front so far but as far as sleeping "normally" (as in kids can get up Saturday morning and watch cartoons for a little while!) or not lugging the diaper bag and stroller around...I can't imagine just getting to the end of it and THEN starting over. But I'm still pretty scared of having a baby and a toddler, so we haven't decided yet. Our first is pretty easy going though, so hopefully that will be a help if we go through with it.<br /> @NaturallyCathy: Tell it like it is! :) I'm trying not to let the NB phase be the thing I make the decision based on and you're definitely in the thick of it..but it's still something I'd absolutely have to consider. I SAH too for now but the other thing factoring into this is whether I want to get a job and work awhile before the next one, or just complete my MA (the original plan before LO) and then have another and then go back to the working world.</p> <p>@MamaBehr: Thanks for mentioning the point about the resentment. I recently read an article that said after 18 months they might resent the next sib, but I also know TTC before a year pp is not recommended nor is it something I think I could bring myself to do.</p> <p>@Mrs. Jacks: What exactly happened with the potty regression? We're not there yet and potty training is something I've been dreading since before preganancy, lol. Oh, public toilets.... </p> <p>@twoofeverything: You're amazing! :) @rawrasaur: My fear is that I'll get pregnant again and it'll be twins, lol! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698563 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 09:27:16 +0000 rawrasaur 698563@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I really wanted 2 under 2, but due to other circumstances it will hopefully be 2 under 3 instead. My mom started out with twins and our younger brother was exactly 2 years later and she said that was easy compared to twins. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698465 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 09:01:01 +0000 twoofeverything 698465@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Well we have twins, so I guess that counts! It's not that hard...try to keep them on the same schedule and figure out the sleep. You'll be fine! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698344 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:57:09 +0000 Mrs. Grizzly Bear 698344@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@sarbear: Agree - tough in the beginning but it gets easier and then easier still as they grow up. At least that's what my mom tells me too - my siblings were 18 months apart. I'm a five years later oops. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698343 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:56:56 +0000 Mrs. Jacks 698343@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not terrible, and I wouldn't change a thing... But looking back on the first four months or so is a bit of a blur.</p> <p>Highlights:<br /> 1) potty regression<br /> 2) an older sib that is both fascinated with and horrified by the little sib and their own new role in the world<br /> 3) you finally get one to sleep and the other one wakes up.<br /> 4) leaving the house takes 10 times as long because you have to prepare so many contingencies for each<br /> However:<br /> 1) I have 2 kids close in age who both adore each other<br /> 2) the older doesn't remember life without the younger.<br /> 3) I'll be done with diapers in less than a year (that was fast!) </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698338 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:51:17 +0000 GrapeCrush 698338@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>my brother was born 12 days after my first birthday...my mom said the transition from 1-2 kids was tough, but she says she wouldn't change a thing about how close we are. she said the transition from 2-3 kids 17 months later was a breeze though! haha</p> <p>i'm hoping it's not too bad, since mine will be 15 months apart. she just keeps telling me it'll be tough in the beginning, but so worth it. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698323 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:41:29 +0000 MamaBehr 698323@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We had ours almost 23 months apart and I think it was perfect! DD was old enough to be somewhat self sufficient (think meal times, getting up the stairs etc) but not too old she resented DS for ruining her being an only child. I had help from my Mom and MIL for the first five weeks and that was wonderful. But, we are going to go for baby #3 to be here when DS is close to 2 as well, because it worked out so well! </p> <p>However, I have a friend who had her third baby when the second was only 18 months and she said that was super hard. The second was still a baby (18 months sounds old, but it gets so much easier the closer they are to two), so maybe the trick is to get as close to two as you can? </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698294 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:21:47 +0000 Mrs. Grizzly Bear 698294@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>I currently have two under two - one is 14 months, the other is just 5 weeks - and I will be the first person to tell you that it's rough. I guess I'm just fortunate DS sleeps through the night since DD definitely doesn't. Some days are rough, especialky when both are screaming and crying for attention in some form and words are beyond them. Some days you'll want to tear your hair out from lack of sleep and energy. And those some days may last the first few weeks but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. It's one of thise things that you know what to do because you haven't had the time or luxury to forget much but you also know these phases won't last forever. This too shall pass sort of thing. At week five, we're starting to hit our stride. But then again, I'm a SAHM doing all this myself (DH helpa at night) so maybe that's why it's working for me. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698278 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 07:08:12 +0000 anbanan15 698278@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>We will be having 2 under 3...~31 months apart. I am a little nervous since DS is a terrible sleeper and very attached, but overall I think it will be better in the long run. They will grow up knowing the same people and we also have close friends whose LO's are 18 months apart so our kids will grow up together (our oldest are 4 months apart and our youngest will be around 8 months apart). I grew up being 5 years apart from my siblings, so I have a brother 10 and 5 years older than me and at times it felt like we were only children. They were out of school I was in by the time I got to middle or high school etc.</p> <p>@scg00387: I felt the same way...I couldn't imagine going back to a "normal" life and then doing it all over again, especially with DS's allergies and the chance of the next having similar issues I wanted things fresh in my mind as well as it doctors. DH was on the other side of the fence because of DS, but his ideal child spacing before LO was 3 years so we are almost at that. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698229 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 06:12:03 +0000 immabeetoo 698229@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>@googly-eyes: haha I've wondered and I think posted the same thing a while back. I can't imagine going back to real sleep and no diapers and then diving back in again... But I also can't imagine trying to leave the house with a toddler and a baby. DH and I are discussing this and I keep repeating that he has to be 100 percent on board because even though he is a big help and very hands on... He's have to amp it up with two! </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698217 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 05:51:18 +0000 mamimami 698217@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>It's not terrible but it's a bit intense at first! I wouldn't so it without a great, supportive partner at the very least. I also have a nanny (I'm a wohm) who really, really helped during my maternity leave with #2. </p> https://boards.hellobee.com/topic/how-hard-is-2-under-2-or-close-child-spacing#post-698174 Mon, 08 Apr 2013 01:10:56 +0000 googly-eyes 698174@https://boards.hellobee.com/ <p>Is it really as terrible as people make it out to be? </p> <p>For those who chose to do it, do you regret it?</p> <p>I feel like its probably harder in the beginning (especially if one or both are bad sleepers) but easier in the long run, for my personal preferences. </p> <p>Is it really so terrible? </p>